Disclaimer: I don't own South Park.
"Okay, children, settle down! We're about to find out who has won the student of the year award!"
Mr Garrison was standing on the stage as he spoke into his microphone. He had gathered all of his class into the gym hall. The entirety of the forth grade sat in the seats, focusing on their eccentric teacher. They were waiting with baited breath for him to present the award one of them was about to win. All of the children watched as Mr Garrison stood on the stage underneath the large red banner which hung from the wall for its bright yellow letters to be read by all.
STUDENT OF THE YEAR
"Oh, man. I can't wait to win that award and rub it in everyone's dumb faces." Cartman said smugly to himself. "I'm so much cooler than everyone else in the class! There's no way I'm gonna lose!
"I sure hope I'm the Student of the Year," Butters mumbled quietly. "It sure would be for me to be recognised for achieving something for once... Plus, my parents said to bring home that award - or else, I'm grounded!"
"I'm definetly gonna win!" Wendy smiled in all her confidence. "I put in the most work in our class assignments! Mr Garrison will have to see I'm the only one deserving of the award!"
"I'd better be the one to take home this award!" A determined frown spread across Token's face. "My parents bribed the school a lot of money to make sure I win! We can't blow away part of our fortune for nothing!"
"If I could just win this one contest..." Craig looked hopefully up towards the sky. "I would be so happy!"
"Argh! Am I gonna win?! Or am I gonna lose?!" Tweek twitched agitatedly as he twitched in all his nervousness. "Oh man! I can't take this suspense, dude!"
"Alright, children, quiet please! It's time to announce the winner!"
The lights in the gym hall dimmed. Mr Garrison stood in the centre of the stage. He held up a shiny golden trophy in his hands, about to present it to one of his students.
"And the winner is..."
The children held their breath, bracing themselves as Mr Garrison prepared to announce the student of the year.
"...the New Kid!"
Jaws fell while aghast eyes widened as it sunk in on the children who had won the contest.
"Douchebag?!" Cartman screamed disbelievingly. "He won the award?"
"What the fuck, dude?" Kenny mumbled under his hood.
The shocked children watched as the New Kid made his way wordlessly up onto the stage. He stood alongside Mr Garrison and gazed up at the teacher, showing absolutely no emotion for beating his classmates in winning they award they all wanted.
"How the fuck does Butthole get to be student of the year?" Stan demanded. "We've been here far longer than he has?!"
"Because, children, this fine young man is one of a kind in South Park Elementary," Mr Garrison explained. "You could all learn a lesson or two from him; he makes friends with everyone easily, knows when to keep his mouth shut and does not swear."
"He also farts all the time..." Kyle muttered bitterly.
"THAT IS BULLCRAP!" Cartman bellowed angrily. "I DO NOT FUCKING SWEAR! YOU TAKE THAT SHIT BACK, MR GARRISON!"
"ERIC, SHUT UP! THE NEW KID WON AND YOU LOST! FACE IT, YA LITTLE FAT TURD!"
Cartman sunk into his chair, crossing his arms with a scowl and murmuring under his breath. "I'll make you eat your parents..."
"Well, congratulations, New Kid, you're the winner." Mr Garrison handed the trophy over. "Do you have anything to say about your victory?"
The New Kid remained silent. His expression didn't change - but it was somehow clear from the way he looked at his trophy that he was hoping to win something better. He stared out at the appalled children watching him, still in disbelief that he had beaten them all.
Then without warning, the New Kid threw the trophy out of his hands, causing it to strike the gym floor and smash into millions of pieces. He proceeded to flip off the other children and Mr Garrison before jumping down from the stage. He marched without a word out of the hall, slamming the door behind him with a bang.
Everyone gaped in complete disbelief. Mr Garrison was now just as stunned as the rest of his student. He couldn't believe he had presented the New Kid with the very award the rest of his class wanted to win - and that was his reaction.
"Wow..." Mr Garrison broken the silence that filled the gym hall. "That sure was ungrateful of him. Wouldn't you agree, Mr Hat?"
The forth grade teacher held up his hand which his faithful puppet was sitting on the end of, proceeding to speak in character on Mr Hat's behalf.
"You said it, Mr Garrison! That New Kid is a little bastard who can go die!"
The end.