A/N: Hey, folks. I'll be completely honest, this is ALL writing practice for me. I've never written a story before, so there's a chance that this story is pretty awful. If so, you have my permission to yell at me about it in the review section. Whether or not I continue this is really up to me and the reception to this thing. Still. Writing practice it may be, I had some degree of fun making it. Always wanted to tinker with the idea of all (major) robots in one giant location. Let's hope Security Breach is good. Anyways, have fun reading this.

Chapter One: E1M1

"...and Connor? Don't take this job as seriously as you have been. The only reason that you're not on day shift is that I'm afraid that you'll bite a kid's head off."

"Sir, it's security. I have to take it seriously."

"The robots have built in safety features and every surface is practically baby-proofed. Again, STOP TAKING THINGS SO SERIOUSLY."

"...Yes, boss."

"For the fifteenth time, it's Michael. And have a good night. Talk to you at 7."

"Okay, Mr. Michael. Goodbye."

"I hate y-"

Click.

I reclined back in my cheap swivel-chair, my eyes glazing at the numerous security monitors in front of me. I looked to my left for the upteenth time, sighing again when the sight of the closed piston-powered security door of my cubicle-like office greeted me. I looked at the clock. 11:59pm. Words from the training manual flashed through my mind. At 12:00am exactly, leave your office, equipped with a flashlight, a SaSS Industries security tablet, and a taser. Patrol the entirety of Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria Planet, covering every stage area, bathroom, dining area, and back room. If a break is required, you may take a 15 minute one at your office. The clock now read 12:00am. I got up, grabbed my flashlight, put my taser in its holster, and pulled the tablet off its charging cable. I did a quick scan of the cameras using it, making sure nothing was out of place. Aside from some static, everything seemed fine. Robots on their stages, no broken windows, arcade machines somehow still on. All good. I opened the piston door, and took a step outside my office.

I was greeted with what could be called the central "hub" of this place. It connected all areas of the place, including the entrance/exit. The sheer size of it still amazed me. Six themed "areas'', each with their own set of stages. 36 animatronic robots, all human-like yet animal-like. Dozens of food areas and arcade rooms. Private rooms. Jungle gyms. Carnival attractions. This place could be called a mall given its scale. Upon starting your patrol, head to the Glamrock Venue first. Check every area. I pushed open the double-doors to the Glamrock Venue area. The area was mostly dark, but night-lights and discarded glow sticks gave the massive room a sort of glow. Everything looked like the '80s threw up on it. All tables had this retro style to it. The robots on the stage had face paint and clothing like rock stars from back in the day. Food stands consisted of theme park food, like popcorn and cotton candy and funnel cakes and nachos. Tables with reflective, flashy tablecloths were scattered everywhere. I took a glance at the stage. All six robots were on there, from the main band ones (those being a bear, an alligator, a chicken, and what seemed to be a wolf) to the creepy looking sun and moon ones. I walked over to the Venue's jungle gym. It was massive. Trapeze ropes, monkey bars, slides, tubes, and a giant ball pit in its center. Everything seemed in order. Then there was a noise. Snap. I immediately turned to the right. At first, I thought it was nothing, that I had accidentally stepped on a popcorn kernel or something. Then I noticed the robots.

Their heads were turned towards me. At least, all the main cast's heads were. They all had their eyes narrowed at me, but other than that their bodies were in the same positions. The wolf was seemingly in the middle of licking her lips in the same way a dog does when it sees food. The chicken had this grin on her face. The crocodile had a worried look on his face. The bear also had a worried look. I shivered. Making sure I maintained eye contact, I walked behind the stage to the private rooms for the Venue. Shining my light through each, they looked like normal private party rooms. Nothing out of the ordinary. Then I heard a loud CRASH coming from the stage. I dashed over, shining my light at it to reveal the robots having changed positions. They weren't moving now, but I noticed that the chicken and the wolf were on the floor, with some appendage of theirs being held by either the bear or the crocodile. It was like they were trying to stop the chicken and the wolf. Their eyes were also following me when I moved. I shivered again. Then I noticed that the sun and the moon robots were missing. Looking around the room, I could tell that they weren't on the ground. I flashed my light at the ceiling. They weren't there, either. I gulped, then slowly backed towards the exit doors. I quickly opened one, walked through it, then slammed it behind me. I took several deep breaths. Then I heard the voices. I looked through the door's window, seeing the four robots bickering onstage. I turned on my tablet, flicking over to the Venue stage camera, turning on the sound.

"...So I take it that the whole 'I promise I won't try to get at the new kid' thing was a bunch of baloney?"

"Come on, Freddy! He's adorable!"

"He's six feet tall, Roxanne. And Chica, I thought we agreed to lay off him. You saw him during the tour Michael gave him today. You saw how shy he looked! I expected better."

"That means he's a serial killer."

"No, Monty, it does NOT, and we both know he isn't."

"Can I go see him now?"

"NO! Besides, you don't even know where he is now, given how he practically ran out!"

"Oh, I DO know..."

The wolf's head immediately snapped to the camera. I jumped. Her head then looked at the door. Both the wolf and the chicken jumped offstage and started running towards the door. Next, head to Toy Carnival. Check every area. I ran from the Venue doors to the Carnival doors, breaking into a full sprint. I heard the doors behind me get slammed open, alongside heavy footsteps. I kicked open the Carnival doors, slammed them shut, then grabbed a chair from a nearby table and put it in front of the doors. The door shook like crazy. Bangs echoed throughout the Carnival tent-like area. I ducked behind a table, anticipating the worst. The knocking subsided. I breathed a sigh of relief, then took in the Carnival's atmosphere. Again, it was dark, but night lights were on. It looked like a circus carnival tent, and every object was circus themed. Posters scattered everywhere had a sort of circus-ad-theme. There were arcade machines around the area, as well as a merry-go-round and a miniature roller coaster that went around the area. I fantasized about riding it, despite knowing that it would probably be very slow. There were carnival games everywhere. The stage for the Carnival looked like a normal stage, but it was made entirely of wood. The robots on it looked like toys one would see in a store. Rosy cheeks, bright, plastic-y colors, exaggerated body proportions. There was a rabbit, a bear, a chicken, and a fox. Unlike the Venue robots, these ones seemed to be turned off, so that was a relief. To each side of the stage were two small robots holding balloons. One male, one female. They seemed friendly. Making sure that the main room seemed situated, I walked over to the prize room. It was a normal-looking prize room. Plushies everywhere, ticket stubs scattered around the floor. An oversized Jack-in-the-box was slowly turning in the corner, emanating oddly soothing music. I took a deep breath. I walked out of the prize room, then walked over to the Carnival's private rooms. They looked like miniature tents. They were rather adorable. I noticed a light on in one. Hesitantly opening the tent flap to it, I discovered a piece of what seemed to be cheesecake with a candle on it, alongside a balloon tied to a weight and a note with a pen next to it, across from which sat a glass bottle of what looked like cola. I picked the note up.

In crude handwriting, I could make out "HelLo, nEw Guy! ChicA thouGhT yoU woUlD wAnT someThing tO eaT. EnJoyy!" I wasn't very hungry, but I really felt thirsty. Taking the pen next to the note, I wrote "I'm sorry, but I am not very hungry. Thank you for the gesture, though! However, I thank you for the drink. Sincerely, the new guy, Connor." I left the tent smiling wildly, a warm feeling in my chest, and the opened cola bottle in my hand. The ceiling then made a scratching noise. I quickly shined my flashlight at the ceiling. The sun and the moon robots were jumping between the wooden supports on the ceiling. They looked at the beam of light from my flashlight, then at me. They then scrambled away, apparently through a ventilation system, as I heard vent-like bangs and echoes. I walked to the double doors of the Carnival exit and removed the chair. I waved at the robots onstage, tilting my cola bottle at them as a thanks, then left the area. Next, head to Rockstar Arena. Check every room.

Arena had a giant stage that seemed to split in two. Posters scattered all over the walls advertised "Dueling Duos'', whatever that means. Everything looked like a rock concert. Again, it was dark, but night lights gave the area a glow. Unlike the previous areas, there weren't very many arcade machines or booth games. There were a lot of speakers and singing booths, though. There were a lot of fast food stands, too. Unlike the rectangular tables of the other areas, there were circular tables and booth seats, all facing the stages. The robots onstage looked a bit too similar to the Toy ones, but they had an interesting rock aesthetic. Like the toy ones, there was a bear, a rabbit, a chicken, and a fox. The fox had a parrot on it. There was a massive go-karting circuit to the left of the stage area. I grinned wildly, trying to resist the urge to jump on one and drive it. The thought of getting sacked for it brought me back to reality, though. When I turned back to the stage, the robots had moved: they had their hands up, as if they were waving to me. I waved back, then wandered to the private rooms. They were karaoke rooms, with microphones and lyric prompts and everything. The walls were also soundproofed. Smart idea. Then I heard a bang. This time, it was the doors.

"Is he in here?!"

"I know so, Rox!"

Ah, great, it's the wolf and the chicken. I quickly slammed the door of the room I was in, locking it. I ducked behind a speaker. Despite the fact that I heard absolutely nothing from the outside, I got the feeling that they were heading my way. I grabbed my taser, turning it on. A shadow then appeared on the window of the door. I held my breath. I heard the lock being undone, realizing that the locks could be unlocked from both sides. The door creaked open, soft footsteps walking on the floor. I didn't move an inch, nor make a sound. "He isn't in here, Chica!" Came the voice of the wolf in the room. "Methinks the rockstars have him backstage," came the voice of 'Chica'. The wolf left the room, but left the door open. I breathed a sigh of relief. I could hear distant arguments:

"I'm telling you, we DON'T HAVE HIM. He went to the private rooms, I'm sure of it!"

"We checked back there, he isn't there!"

"Well, I don't know what to tell you two, other than STOP LUSTING AFTER HIM. He's scared enough as is!"

"Never!"

I sighed, leaning against the wall. I heard scratching noises from the maintenance vent to my right. I shined my light at it. It opened, revealing what seemed to be a small, hot pink rabbit. "Hey, new guy! Through here! You were on your way to Funtime Disco anyway, right?" I nodded. "Alright, I'll come with you. Let me close this door first." I got up, walked over to the door, and prepared to close it. Remembering that I still had my now empty cola bottle, I dropped it into a recycling bin next to the door- which then made an audible crash. "I KNEW he was there!" I slammed the door, then threw myself into the maintenance vent. "Follow me, new guy!" I hastily crawled through the vent, slamming it shut. Using my flashlight as a guide, I crawled my way through the labyrinthine vent system. "My name's Bonnet. What's yours?" Came the voice of the pink rabbit. "My name's Connor, ma'am." Bonnet scowled. "Don't call me ma'am. Just Bonnet is fine. I guess the rumors were serious about you being, er, serious," I sighed.

"Just doing my job, ma'am."

"Though I told you to stop that."

"Whatever you say, ma'am. How did you find me?"

"Call it a lucky guess. I knew you were in the Arena, but I didn't know where you were in there precisely. And stop calling me 'ma'am'."

Eventually, we reached an end of the shaft. Bonnet opened the grate, climbing through. "This is the place! Come on through, Connor." I climbed out of the grate into what seemed to be a storage room. "Drink storage. The strawberry sodas are my favorite. Funtime Disco is the only area in Pizza Planet that's only for adults, but I have a feeling that you knew that already."

"Yes, miss Bonnet."

"None of that 'miss' garbage, alright?! Stop being tense."

Funtime Disco looked like a disco bar. So many blues, purples and reds. Bars at every other corner. Standing tables. Instead of a single stage, there were multiple. They all looked empty, though. There were two stories, and multiple sets of stairs. A DJ booth sat on the second floor, overlooking the main dance floor. Speakers everywhere. Cocktail napkins littered the floor. "Want a drink, Connor?" I turned to my left. Bonnet stood at a bar, a glass in her hand. "I don't drink. Do you have water?" She turned around, facing a water tap. She put two small ice cubes in the glass and filled it up. She slid the drink over to me. I grabbed my wallet, reached in, and put a 5 dollar bill on the counter. I chugged the water. "Bonnet, where the heck have you bee- oh, you found the new guy!" A booming voice echoed throughout the dance floor. I turned around. A pink fox, microphone in hand, was running up to us. "Didn't I see you in the Carnival area?" The fox laughed. "You saw my sister! I'm her brother."

"Ah."

"Let's talk about you, though. We've been on damage control for you since the two Glamrocks decided to go head over heels for you. They've been running around everywhere looking for you!"

"I'm sorry for the trouble, sir."

"Okay, pardon my French, but don't goddamn apologize. You have done nothing wrong. I'd blame my ruined makeup on you, but this situation has gotten so out of hand that I'd rather blame it on Rox."

"Alright then."

"Man of a few words, I take it?"

"You could say that, sir."

The pink fox looked at Bonnet, an eyebrow raised. "I already told him to stop doing that, but I don't think he's going to." I walked off, starting to look around the first floor of the Disco. Noting nothing out of the ordinary, I walked upstairs. The second floor seemed to house all the private rooms. Each one had a couch and chairs, a minibar and what looked like a stripper pole. I assumed the customers used them, and not the robots. "Hello, human." I turned to my left to see a ballerina robot. "How d'you do, ma'am?" She seemed to giggle slightly. "Don't call me ma'am, I feel old enough. What are you doing up here?"

"My job. I'm the new night security guard, miss."

"Ah. You've stirred up quite the calamity with the Glamrocks."

"I didn't mean to, miss."

"I know you didn't. The important thing is that you're safe. Let's get you downst-"

"Ballora? You should come and see this."

"Oh, dear."

The two of us ran down to the first floor. A ginger-haired, pig-tailed robot pointed towards the door. A bear and the pink fox were holding it shut, seemingly with great effort. "The two of them want in." Looking towards the door, we saw Roxanne and Chica banging and shoving against the door. The girl robot looked at Ballora. "What are we going to do? We can't keep him here forever." Ballora looked at me, then at the doors, then at the stairs. "At my mark, let them in." Ballora then led me upstairs. I raised an eyebrow. "Here is my plan: we let them in, they go up this staircase, but then you run down the other set of stairs and escape." I nodded. We walked about halfway to the other set of stairs. "NOW!" The doors banged open, footsteps echoing. "Go, human!" I sprinted down the other set of stairs, threw open the double doors, and ran towards Classic Cove. Check every room.

As soon as the screams of frustration coming from the other side of the double doors died down, I took in Classic Cove's calm atmosphere. Unlike the other areas, Cove was quite small. Given the number of pizza decorations, I could assume pizza was the food for the area. There were three robots on the area's stage: another bear, another chicken, and another rabbit. A tented off area read "pirate's cove". The tables were wooden, and had numerous paper plates and plastic utensils everywhere. There was a pair of long hallways that seemed to converge on a single room. After I looked inside, I realized that it was a security room, complete with a camera system and doors. I picked up my tablet, flicking through the cameras for the Cove's area. Seemed relatively normal. When I checked the bathrooms, they seemed perfectly fine. Then I heard walkie-talkie feedback. I snapped my attention towards Pirate Cove. An arm was extending out, holding a security radio.

I cautiously walked over. A voice, seemingly the owner of the arm, suddenly spoke. "Just take it, laddie. It'll definitely help ye in yer job."

"Who are you, sir?"

"Call me 'sir' again, laddie, and I'll tern ye into dog meat. It's Foxy."

"Alright, Mr. Foxy. I'm Conner, the new night guard."

"I know who ye are. The Glamrock bimbos 'ave been looken' fer ye for the past hour that ye've been on duty. I'd call it 'negligence', but ye can't fix or control lovesickness."

"Wait, you know about that, Mr. F-"

"Don't call me 'Mr.', ye cretin. Just 'Foxy' is fine."

"Alright, …Foxy, if you know that, do you know why they're after me? Why do they like me in particular in relation to all the other staff?"

"'Other staff'? HA! 'Ave ye seen the other staff? They're all just weed addicts an' secret drunkards! Last I checked, yer none of those. They're all loud and angry and impatient, and yet here ye are, quiet as a mouse, listening to me ramble. They take every excuse to touch or grope 'em, and yet yer afraid ta even look at 'em! Har, har, har!"

"To be frank, I don't think being quiet and scared are desirable traits for, er, 'boyfriend material'. What about Michael? Or Jeremy? Or Fritz? Or Henry? They've all never smoked or drank anything. Henry's debatable, though. Jeremy is the quietest person I have ever seen. Michael is extremely friendly. All Fritz does is mind his own business. Why me and not them?!"

"Jeremy's quiet, absolutely, but he's amazin' with the kiddos. Never seen a man so happy before. He's a stuttering mess everywhere else, honestly. That Toy Chica bimbo is seemingly the only one that calms 'em down. Never seen a happier couple. Michael is friendly, absolutely, but he's more of a dad, if anythin'. Fritz minds his own business too well. He practically blends into walls, and 'e happens to have the personality of said walls! Ha! Henry is questionable, as ye said. Ye though, yer diff'rent. Yer quiet, more composed. That tour Michael took ye on, we watched you pick up on things. Watched ye be friendly with people, yet refuse eye contact and remain as stubbornly professional as a mule with a law degree! Ha! Yer a good kid. Yer stubborn to an excessive degree, sometimes to yer own detriment. They like ye because they see the friendly side to ye. They want to be intimate with ye, yet be yer best friend ever."

"...Foxy, do you always call the girls here 'bimbo's?"

"Always 'ave, laddie. Tern on that service radio. Every worker 'ere 'as one, even us! It'll let ye eavesdrop, help ye avoid them fer as long as ye like. Still, I hope ye realize that ye can't run ferever. Ye have to talk to them at some point."

"...You're right. I'll talk to them later tonight. I promise."

I took the radio and left the Cove, waving bye to Foxy. I headed for the last major area, the Melody Cafe. Opening the double doors, I was pleasantly surprised: it was a cafe. The cafe was small, with the only stage housing 5 robots: an elephant, a frog, a hippo, a pig, and another bear. The walls were decorated with old album covers and vinyl disks. The small tables had tea bags and sugars. It was a small coffee shop. The order counter for it had a note secured by a steaming mug and a pen. I walked over and picked it up. "Hello, new guy," the note read, "Welcome to your new job. Help yourself to some coffee and a pastry. On the house. Have fun at your new job!" I smiled, picking up the mug. Black coffee. I walked over to the back counter, grabbed two packets of sugar, then sprinkled them in. I added a small amount of milk, which I found from a minifridge below the counter. Mixing it together, I took a sip. I breathed out an ahhh. It was a pretty good cup. Deciding I wasn't hungry despite the carrot cake slices seemingly calling my name, I sat down in a booth, coffee in hand. I reached for my radio, and activated it. "Security guard Connor reporting in. Finished my sweep of the area and am having a coffee. Anything out of the ordinary, tell me immediately. Over."

"I see our plan worked. Who gave you a radio?" Ballora.

"Mr. Foxy from the Cove did. Nice person."

"I can still hear ye, ye cretin. Stop calling me 'sir' or I'll slap the coffee out yer hands!" Foxy.

"Haha!" Monty.

"Conner? You're safe! Thank goodness!" Glam Freddy.

"Conner! Where are you?" Roxanne.

"Please, Conner, we want to cuddle ya 'till morning." Glam Chica.

"I think the fact that he said he has a coffee should be your key. Before the two of you decide to break open the cafe's doors, remember the rule. Also, don't kill him by hugging him too hard." Bonnet.

"Melody! We'll be right there, cutie!" Roxanne.

I sighed. Maybe this wasn't the best idea. I took a sip of my coffee, leaning back in my booth. Within two minutes, the two robots entered the cafe, then peacefully grabbed chairs and sat next to my booth. I raised an eyebrow. They smiled at me. I cleared my throat. "It has come to my understanding that you two like me for some reason, despite us meeting literally just today." They nodded, Roxanne licking her lips. I gulped. "It has also come to my understanding that you two want to do… intimate… things with me." They nodded harder this time. "There are problems, though. Firstly, my job is to be a security guard. Not a boyfriend. Secondly, I'm not sure how I feel about potentially dating two people at once, discounting the 'being robots' variable of the equation. Thirdly, I am entirely unsure how the more... intimate… actions are possible." The two of them giggled. "Oh, that's not a problem." I shrugged. "Al...right then. I believe I have a way that we can date. I want to get to know you two better, before we jump to any hasty conclusions. I admit we can't do that all in one night, so how about we start next week, after I learn how to do my job right?"

The two looked at each other, then back at me. They smiled. "Sure," said Roxanne. "Fine," said Glam Chica. I smiled. "Glad we understand each other." I held out my hand. "Hi. I'm Conner. Nice to meet you." Glam Chica grabbed my hand, gently shaking it. We both let go, nodding at each other. I offered my hand to Roxanne. She grabbed my hand and shook it, grinning wildly. I let go of her hand, but she didn't let go of mine. I raised an eyebrow. She suddenly grabbed the back of my head with her free arm, snaked the handshake hand around my waist, and crushed her lips with mine. My eyes grew wide, as did Glam Chica's. She eventually parted after what felt like 10 seconds. "What was that about?!" I demanded. "You taste good," was her only reply, giggling throughout. I looked at Glam Chica, who was blushing like mad. "I'm guessing you want to get even with her-AGH," she grabbed me and similarly crushed her lips with mine. After what felt like another 10 seconds, we parted. "I guess that's one way to get even," I sighed. "Rox was right. I look forward to our dates, cutie." The two got up and left the cafe, leaving me with my coffee. After your patrol is finished, return to your office. I finished my coffee, got up, put the mug in the sink behind the counter, then put a 10 dollar bill in the cafe's tip jar. I nodded in the robots' direction, then left.

I collapsed into my office cubicle clock only read 2:23am. I groaned. Upon completion of your initial patrol, you may roam as you please, guarding any room or area that you wish. I picked up my radio. "This is security guard Connor. Just arrived at my office, waiting for something to do. Over."

"You can do us!" Roxanne.

"Whyyyy? That was awful, even for you." The pigtailed robot.

"I pun, therefore I am." Roxanne.

"...an asinine wolf who broke my damn door?" Pink Foxy.

"I said I was going to help you fix it, wasn't I?!" Roxanne.

"Was this before or after you made out with Connor in a booth in Melody?" Glam Chica.

"YOU DID WHAT." Glam Freddy.

"You did it too, Chica! And it isn't technically making out if a kiss lasts for only 10 seconds!" Roxanne.

"Oh, it most definitely counts." A new voice.

"Hey, can we not have this conversation while we know Connor's listening? He's probably uncomfortable enough as it stands. Rox, Chica, we'll discuss what you two did to him off-radio. Connor, good job for your first night, we don't really know of anything you can do. Await further updates. Over." Monty.

"Copy. Will remain on standby. Over." I leaned back in my chair, flipping through cameras. Roxanne installing a new door, the Toys practicing a new song, the Funtimes dancing, the classics chatting onstage, the Glamrocks playing arcade games, the cafe robots brewing more coffee, the Rockstars apparently engaged in a rock-paper-scissors war. I sighed again. Peace.

When 7am rolled around, all of the robots were back on their stages. I left the office, eager to go home. On my way to the exit, I poked my head into the Venue. I gave a friendly wave towards the robots. "Connor." I jumped a little bit. "Hello, Mr. Michael."

"Connor, what have I told you. Annoyances aside, you did a great job. They've never been this quiet at 7, well, EVER. I appreciate it."

"Just doing my job, sir."

"Connor. STOP. So, I'll see you at 11:50 this evening?"

"Yes, you will. You can count on it."

"Good! See you then. Have a good, long nap. Again, fantastic job."

My apartment's couch seemed like a better bed than an actual bed. As soon as I shut my door, I slumped into my couch, head buried into a pillow. Turning myself around, I looked at the ceiling. I felt my mouth. "A robot just kissed me," I said to nobody. I sighed for what felt like the fiftieth time. As I drifted off to sleep the thought "...and I kind of liked it…" wafted in my mind.

A/N: That was certainly something. Leave a review. Oh, and NO, Conner isn't a self-insert, although he is based on some aspects of my personality that have been multiplied to eleven. Those being my hypercritical thought process and my stubbornness. Again, Conner isn't a S/I. Leave a review, why don't you.