And the Blood Kept Running

by thesketchytepe

The massacre survivors discover another body in the Jaeger barn and are thrown into another series of nightmares as they help Detective Ackerman and Hanji catch the killer. Dr Smith is quickly losing grasp of his patients at his rehab center and seeks for help from the most unlikely places. All must face what is haunting them the most: ghost of the past or their own mental turmoil.

1. Two Years (Levi POV)

** thesketchytepe and blueTshirts at it again to break your even more! This is a sequel to our other fic "I'll Make You Bleed" and we highly recommend you read that one first because we won't be doing much recap in this fic. WARNING: this fic contains many references to depression, self-harm, suicide, other mental illnesses, crime scene despcriptions and violence, adult diagolue, and explores the concept of death often. If you are sensitive to any of these topics, please read with caution or don't read at all. We do not use "many references" lightly-all these topics will be discussed heavily. In absolutely no way are we suggesting that suicide or self-harm is okay; PLEASE seek help if you are experiencing such things.

This fic is very much like a mystery novel, so there are many layers to this story, which is why it took us so long to get this posted. We've rewritten time and time again, backtracking details, researching like crazy, and making sure we nail characterization on Mr. Isayama's part. Nevertheless, we hope you enjoy! All your comments and likes definitely kept us going and we can't thank you enough. This fic probably wouldn't have happened if it were for you guys. THANK YOU!

Written by: blueTshirts**

Sirens echoed in the light polluted distance. Dogs barked at faceless shadows. Cars screeched and growled along empty streets. My shoes scraped on the brittle asphalt of the empty gas station parking lot.

I dragged my feet towards the convenience store. I glanced at the setting sun behind tall buildings in the skyline. I frowned. I was hoping I wouldn't have to make the long walk back home in the dark. It took me longer than I thought to get to this gas station. I haven't been to this one yet. I had to ditch the last one I used too frequently. The cashier started to recognize me. He asked too many questions. It couldn't have been long until he was chasing me off the property with a dusty broom.

Green fluorescent lighting illuminated unoccupied gas pumps and stained pavement. Blinking beer brand logos and open signs flashed like a broken down car's dashboard along the windows of the shop. Old posters hung loosely off the clear glass and advertised aged promotions. It was kind of a dumpy place for the nicer than average neighborhood surrounding it. The nice cars that I saw pass by made me sneer with disdain and pick self consciously as the holes in my sweatshirt. Fuck nice cars. Fuck nice neighborhoods. Fuck elitist pricks.

My stomach ached with a pang of hunger. I ignored it.

My eyes scanned the bright interior of the convenience store as I approached it. It was a small place but packed with aisles carrying a million types of unhealthy shit. There barely looked to be enough space to walk around. Hopefully the copious amount of aisles would help hide me.

I noticed the cashier ringing out a couple at the entrance of the shop. I raised my eyebrow at the empty parking lot. They must've walked. Noted.

I took slow steps to perfect my plan in my head as I entered the gas station's convenience store.

A soft ding rung above my head as I pushed open the glass door. I grimaced. That was going to make it a bit more difficult to get away. Whatever. I'll deal with it. I inhaled the scent of cigarette tar and bleach. My lip twitched.

I turned to the right towards that back of the shop where tall glowing refrigerators lined the wall. I ignored the cashier and the other two occupants entirely and planned on using the two of them to help with a bit of distraction. Unfortunately, that meant I didn't have a lot of time.

I quickly grabbed a couple cans of soda and stuffed them up my sweatshirt sleeves. My eyes scanned the contents of the alcohol selection. I noticed the swish of plastic bags at the front of the store. Time was running short. I'd have to come back for that another day.

I snagged a few candy bars blindly along with random snacks that weren't in loud, crinkly bags. I spared a moment to glance at the front of the store over a rack of processed pastries. The couple seemed to be chatting contently with the cashier. They all looked to be the same age. At least from what I could tell from the back of their heads. They were all probably high schoolers like me.

I risked a few extra moments to grab anything that wasn't too noisy and shoved them in my pockets. My clothes were baggy on my thin body and did nicely when hiding stolen shit. I'd learned the best places to hold crap in my clothes in a way that looked the most natural and wouldn't fall out.

My chest tightened when I heard exchanges of goodbye echo from the register. I peaked up at the trio, frowning when the couple turned towards the door.

The girl, her brunette hair bushy like a labrador and tied into a swinging tail at the back of her head, spun on her heel with her pointer finger thrusted into the air. "Wait, I forgot Nutter Butters."

She skipped back through the shop and bolted directly towards me in the candy aisle. I stumbled backwards and turned into the next aisle nearly taking down a rack of discounted Doritos with me.

I huffed out an exhale, shifting so that my shit wasn't going to flop out of my sleeves the next time I moved. And leaned over to peak at the girl down the aisle.

Something in my gut churned amongst the hunger pains. My eyebrows knitted together as I stared at her. I recognized her. Although I wasn't from this area, and had absolutely no connection with any of the rich fucks in this part of town, something about her still rang a bell.

She stood there with her hands on her hips while tapping her toe on the tile as she browsed the variety of peanut butter snacks. She hummed to herself, more like muttered to herself like she's buzzing through the pros and cons of getting each type of snack. It made my head hurt just listening to her.

She was dressed in baggy gray sweatpants that bunched around her ankles and a loud teal t-shirt that looked three sizes too big with a neon pink Fanta logo on the front. Her messy hair hung straggly, standing out of her ponytail that swished in front of her face as she moved. She had bulky round glasses that slipped down her nose as she starred at the shelves. She looked like someone I'd see around my parts of town.

"Hanji, let's go," a deep voice called. I stiffened at the name. In the spare moments from when I heard that ever familiar name float through the candy aisle to when the owner of the voice stepped towards the girl, a rush of memories smacked the back of my head like a swinging shovel.

He stood at the end of the aisle looking tired and out of patience. A gray plastic bag full of assorted snacks hung from his fingertips as he stared at his friend. Opposite of the girl, he dressed in khakis with a red polo shirt. His blond hair was combed nicely away from his frowning face.

I flinched back to hiding behind the Doritos and squeezed my eyes shut. I knew these people. I used to be friends with these people. And now I was about to use them as a diversion so I could steal food to eat for the next couple days.

"I'm comin' I'm comin'," Hanji muttered to herself. I listened to her grab a noisy bag, pause, grab another bag, and then exit the aisle.

"You don't need two, we already have-"

"You obviously have no care for the art of science, Commander."

"And you have no conscious for sugar intake but someone's got to keep an eye on you," Erwin replied. Erwin and Hanji. Damn it had been a while since I'd thought about them. I was sure they hadn't thought about me for even longer.

"Has anyone ever told you you're a buzz kill?" Hanji said as she strolled to the register again to pay for more snacks. "And about as helpful as a condom I might add."

"I don't...what does that even mean?"

"That explains everything."

I could only make out the low grumbles of Erwin's deep voice from back in the store. I decided that this was my last chance to get out of here without getting caught and started doing my best to act as nonchalant as possible considering the circumstances.

I kept my head low and my body loose as I exited the convenience store. I tried to not make it look like I was running away without getting everything I wanted. I was going to have to snatch some smokes from somewhere else on the way back.

As I raised my hand to push open the front door I spared a glance over my shoulder at Erwin and Hanji at the counter. The cashier was softly smiling while the pair bickered at each other like an old married couple. They had always done that. The memory made my chest hurt.

I took a moment too long to steal a look from my old friends because Hanji's wild eyes met mine in a quick flick. I nearly flinched.

It was too late. I knew Hanji. A brain like Hanji's was like a shark hunting a bleeding seal. She was quick and unstoppable. She recognized me. I knew it. I just hoped she wouldn't care.

And then her lips quirked into a smile. "Levi?" she said ignoring both Erwin and the cashier.

I looked away quickly, shoving the door open and busting into the dark outside. I shoved my hands into my pockets and shuffled towards the road in a swift escape. Holding onto the shit in my clothes, I made a run for it. I darted around the building and started booking it down the glowing street lamp lit road. I struggled to keep the snacks in my clothes as I started sweating under the pressure.

"Hey, wait!" Hanji's voice echoed from the shop.

I didn't bother to glance behind me. I continued running even as candy bars started slipping from my hoodie and left a sugar trail after me. Who cares? They wouldn't be interested enough to run after me for too long. I would just have to out-

"Levi!" My name was screamed into my ear as a flying body crashed into my back and sent me face planting into the concrete. My body hit the ground in painful scraps, popping bags, and exploding pop cans.

I hissed at the cans that forced blunt bruises into my skin and started spewing sugary sewage onto me and Hanji's clothes. Hanji squirmed off of me as she started getting sprayed by the soda, rolling to the side and staring at me with wicked confusion.

I cursed as I sat up and threw the cans off of me and sent them flying into the grass nearby to empty out of range. Once the sodas were gone, I sat there in a sticky mess glaring at the stains covering my sweatshirt.

"Heh, sorry," Hanji said breathlessly. After a moment of me completely ignoring her existence and trying to devise a plan on getting out of the situation, she asked, "Wait, where'd you get those?"

I closed my eyes feeling my fingers twitch in the drying soda.

"Stole all that, didn't you?" Erwin's brash voice condemned. I looked down the pavement at the fucker's polished shoes as he strode down the sidewalk with his plastic bags rattling at his side.

Hanji made a noise. "You-wait, really?"

I glared up at her, finally volunteering to meet her eyes. Her fuzzy hair was now slicked with some of the soda spray but she didn't seem to care. Her crooked smile started to fade as she looked back at me.

"Get lost. What's it matter to you fucks anyway." I muttered as I gathered myself and stood. I turned and started walking back towards my part of town. Hopefully they could just ignore everything and let me go.

They didn't, of course.

"We just wanted to say hi," Hanji mumbled as I walked away.

"Hanji, let's go," Erwin said. I shoved my sticky hands back into my pockets and tried to start forgetting everything.

"No, I don't-" I heard Hanji's footsteps smack the ground as she jogged to catch up to me. Instead of hitting me with a flying tackle this time, she grabbed me by the shoulder. I glared at her. She gave me a familiar side smile. "I just wanted to say hi you weirdo, you didn't have to run out of there."

"We're not friends anymore, Hanji. Forget it."

Her eyebrows knitted together. "Since when are we not friends?"

"We haven't talked to each other in almost two years."

She shrugged, "So?"

I rolled my eyes and swatted her hand away from my shoulder. "Just forget it Hanji, you guys have a new life now."

She pursed her lips like a thinking cartoon character and crossed her arms with a huff. "Still don't know why we can't be friends."

I shook my head and started turning back to continue my walk. It was going to take a while to get home anyway. It would probably be midnight before I could get to bed.

"Ah ah," Hanji tisked as she grabbed my elbow. My nose wrinkled in distaste. If only she knew what I did to anyone else that grabbed me. "Come hang out with us. It's sleepover science night. We're seeing how many nutter butters I can eat before I have to use my epipen."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "You're what?"

She laughed to herself. She was taller, I noticed. Either she was taller or I had let myself stay hunched in this horrible posture for far too long. "C'mon it'll be fun. Plus it might make Erwin feel better so that he doesn't have to drive me to the hospital alone."

I glanced up at Erwin behind her. I caught myself eyeing his arm before I met his eyes. I didn't mean to, I had just never seen much of Erwin after he had lost his arm. It didn't seem to bother him as much anymore.

He shrugged when we met eyes. I figured he'd think I'd become a heathen like the rest of my family. Kids like him with money, cars, and khakis didn't mesh well with my family that's distinctly active in the city's drug trade. But he didn't seem to look at me much differently. It almost felt like it hadn't been two years but only two days since I'd seen them.

Erwin gives a flat smile. He sucks at smiling, it always looks like he's trying to imitate a portrait of George Washington. "You can at least help me get her drunk enough so that she doesn't eat any peanut butter in the first place."

Hanji's expression lit up with fire. "A duel!" she said as her eyes shifted mischievously to the side. "With three people and an epipen. Excellent."

I looked at the ground again, noticing the trail of candy bars down the sidewalk and the soaked soda spot on the pavement. My stomach cursed at me.

"We're getting pizza too," Hanji said with a shrug. It didn't look like she noticed the loud rumbling in my stomach, although maybe she did and she was trying to not make me feel bad. "We can stuff our faces and catch up."

"Yeah, let's go, it's getting cold," Erwin stated supporting Hanji. It wasn't cold, I think he was just trying to get me to agree to plans.

I weighed my options. Either that the hour and half walk back home in the dark with no food to find Kenny at home blackout drunk or high off his ass and suffer the night to scrounge up some food in the morning, or I could go along with my past friends and let them give me food and possibly wrangle Nutter Butters out of Hanji's crazy hands for the rest of the night.

A ball of guilt built in my gut. I didn't want them to take care of me. It was selfish, greedy, and weak. I could take care of myself. I didn't need them. But also, maybe they really did just want to hang out. And I couldn't remember the last time I'd hung out with any friends. Maybe it was as long as two years ago.

I sighed, letting myself fall victim to Erwin and Hanji's kindness. "Yeah, alright."

That day changed my life.

We had been inseparable for years, but when the shit went down with Erwin's family, it was like they disappeared. In a flick of a switch they were my light and hope, and then they were gone. The darkness I was left in for two years made me believe that I really never had a chance to become that great person they thought I was. I was alone, again. All I had was my shitbag uncle and an odd willingness to survive.

But once again, the light flicked back on and I was brought out of the darkness.

If I hadn't ran into Hanji and Erwin that day, I would've continued to get wrapped up in my shit uncle's lifestyle and become a criminal to survive. But instead, I had Erwin and Hanji. They had my back. They looked after me and I after them. We became the trio like we used to be. I was happy again. I graduated high school because of them. I decided to go to college because of them. I found my wife because of them.

It haunts me to think about what would've happened if I lived the rest of my life without them.

And now as Hanji is barreling down the freeway like a wolf through the mountains, I listen to the hysterical cries of a boy that lost the only support system he had, I think about what his life will be now that he has no one. I wonder if I may have ended up the same as him. Lost, confused, alone.

Alone.

"Jean. Jean, listen to me. Hey," I say starting to raise my voice of his never ending babbling over the phone. His panicked, frantic breathing sounds like a train trying to pull an emergency stop on busted brakes.

"It's Armin. Armin's here. He-he's d-dead. He's dead. Armin's dead. Levi, Armin's dead!" Jean wheezes over the speaker. His cries are thick with tears and spiraling with a breakdown. I just hope Annie can keep him from snapping before we get here.

"Armin's not dead, Jean. Hanji just talked to Erwin. Armin's alive. He's fine. He's at the house-"

"No! No he's not, he's here. He's at the barn. He's dead. S-Someone k-killed him. He's dead."

"He's not dead, Jean!" I say almost instantly regretting that I'm raising my voice. As calm as I want to be, as calm as I should be, I can't seem to shake that same fear of what happened two years ago when I got a similar terrifying call. Or even just a year ago, finding Jean in those woods wishing for death to find him.

Jean's cries are the only thing that answers me. I think I can hear Annie on the other end trying to rationalize with Jean. She usually does pretty good with him considering how long they've been living together. Although there's not much anyone can do when he gets really bad.

"Are you sure we shouldn't send back-up?" Hanji nervously asks with her white knuckle grip on the steering wheel.

I shake my head pulling the phone away from my ear. "We have to see if it's real or not. This isn't the first time he's done this."

Hanji seems unconvinced but drops it and focuses on her driving.

I listen to the phone again, doing my best to gauge just how far gone Jean is going this time. He's crying mostly. Wretched sobs that rip ugly gasps from him. The frantic breathing is only going to fuel the panic. He needs to calm down the best he can if he wants to stay in touch with reality. He seems to forget that.

As soon as I'm about to start reminding him to focus on his breathing, he chokes on a violent breath and nearly screams. "Go away, Marco!"

I press my lips together and close my eyes, my grip on my phone threatening to crack the screen.

Shit.

I continue to listen to Jean yell at his hallucination of Marco. He tells him to go away, to shut up, to stop. Whatever any of that means. From what I've put together, Jean's usually been pretty protective of his favorite little coping mechanism. He hides it as much as he can but he's not a genius.

I would expect that he would want Marco with him at this moment. But instead he's screaming at him to leave.

It hollows a pit in my gut.

Alone, I think again.

The rest of the car ride, I keep Jean on the phone and do whatever I can to keep him talking to me rather than yelling at hallucinations or imagining his friend dead. It feels like it takes hours to get to the estate.

Hanji turns onto the gravel driveway of the Jaeger Estate with the grace of a cat being chased by a thunderstorm. She blazes down the pathway and screeches to a halt next to Jean and Annie's van. She seems to have no concern with traumatic memories or present dangers as she flings herself out of the car and starts bolting towards the barn that we've grown to be quite familiar with. I follow after her into the woods.

I think back to seeing this place set aflame with the fire Eren had started, the murders Eren had committed, and the traps Eren had set. If only I'd been more cautious. If only I'd paid more attention. If only I'd done my job right.

I think back to stomping through these woods in pitch blackness looking for Jean wondering if he was dead or alive.

It doesn't take long for Hanji and I to come up to the barn, dark, old, and falling apart at the seams. It looks just as it should for all the horrors it's seen.

Jean and Annie are sitting next to a tree a fair distance away from the barn. Jean curled up with his head pressed to his knees and his hands flat over his ears. He's twitching and shaking and muttering to himself as Hanji and I approach them.

Annie is sitting in front of Jean, her elbows resting on her knees as she remains unmoving and staring at a single spot in the grass. I notice one of her hands gripping a slim box in her lap.

Hanji approaches the pair with no hesitance. I pause for a moment wondering if it's the best idea that we're running to them in such a hectic hurry. Remaining calm in this situation is imperative. It's our responsibility.

In the moments I'm concerned for Hanji's abrasive nature when it comes to people who are in unstable mental state, I realize that she's not being hectic and abrasive because she's scared for the two, she's looking for the body.

Hanji skids to a halt in front of the pair on the ground with her hands held in claws at her sides and asks, "Where is it?"

I frown, wanting to step up to Hanji and shove her aside and leave the poor kids alone. I'm ready to step in and be the barrier between Hanji's crazy and the pair in shock, but Annie lifts her head. Her blonde hair is in thin strands around her shell shocked face as she slowly looks up at Hanji with barely any readable expression on her face. Beyond the swollen pale scars over her eye and cheek you can see the true fear that she tries so desperately to keep contained. Her sunken, lightless eyes trail up the detective, pause, and then she lifts a finger towards the barn.

My chest tenses. There can't be a body. It would only be by a sick, twisted coincidence that a dead body would be on the Jaeger property on the only day that Jean and Annie decided to visit.

But I'd only talked to Jean on the phone. Jean, by any means, is an unreliable source with his long history of hallucination problems and PTSD. I believe that he saw a dead body, but that doesn't mean there's actually one here.

Annie, on the other hand, she's not one to be rattled by ghosts.

My eyes follow Hanji as she steps towards the decaying building. My mind swirling with begging pleas for the speculation to be wrong, for memories to be erased, and for the horror to remain in the past.

I can't be wrong again. I can't fail again.

Hanji pauses when coming up to the barn. She peeks inside, lifting her phone and turning on the flashlight, waits, then turns around.

She types a number on her phone and lifts it to her ear. Almost immediately the person she's calling answers.

"Moblit, hey," she says, her detective voice kicking in. "Yeah bring the team out the Jaeger Estate, we've got a body."

The clenching of my chest and the sweat clamming my palms comes to a halt. The swirling thoughts and anxiety flips like a switch into detached coldness. I close my eyes, sigh, and make my way to Annie and Jean.

Annie is still sitting there, her eyes unfocused and her protective hands on the box in her lap. I don't try to say anything to her. I don't know if I can.

Jean is huddled in on himself. His messy, unkempt hair is ragged over his head like he's been pulling at it. He keeps his hands flat over his ears with his face in his lap and his eyes squeezed shut. He looks so young, innocent, as if he's just a child that just saw a hand reach out from under their bed. His glowing white fingertips curl and claw fist fulls of hair like his efforts to block out the sounds around him aren't working. He's crying and hiccupping and blubbering to himself in a panicked mess. The worst part is that it looks like he's trying. Jean's been in therapy since the day the massacre happened. Under his breath between the trembling names of the people that he lost and the desperation for it all to stop, I hear him try to count down from one hundred, or repeat his calming mantras, or hold his breaths as he listens to his heartbeat.

But none of it is working.

I squat next to him and grab his shoulder in a tight grasp as if I could squeeze the panic out of him. He doesn't budge. I listen to his babbling for a moment and the only phrases I can make out are whimpering, "It's my fault," and the name Marco.

I sigh to myself again, feeling the growing finger of guilt scratching at my insides.

I'm sorry.

"Jean," I say in a defeated voice. He still doesn't budge. I start to notice the smears of red at his fingertips. Without meaning to be so harsh, I quickly smack my hand over Jean's wrist and pull his scratching hand from his head. This time Jean flinches and meets my eyes with a ghastly expression.

His bright red eyes continue to leak with sloppy tears that dampen his cheeks. His face is flush and red marks bloom near his eyes where he had them pressed into his knees. His hair is a mess and I can't tell how bad the scratches along the sides of his head are under his dark hair that's grown just a bit too long.

I glance down at his hand in my grasp and see the blood under his fingernails.

"Let's go," I tell him, tugging on his arm. His eyes search frantically around him. His glance stops on the pacing Hanji who's still on the phone.

"Is…" he starts, turning his head back to me. "Is he dead?"

"It's not Armin, Jean," Annie practically hisses at Jean beneath her. I'm almost surprised at the grit behind her words she sneers at him like he's lying to her. "It's a woman."

Jean continues to look at me with pleading eyes. It makes my stomach hurt. I shouldn't be the only person he trusts anymore. He used to be surrounded by people that loved him and cared for him and would have protected him.

Before I can confirm that the dead body is not in fact Armin who is still safely housed with Dr. Smith, Jean's eyes shift over my shoulder and up a couple feet. The change in his expression sends chills down my spine.

His pleading eyes gape as more tears stream down his cheeks and drip from his chin. He heaves around the thick saliva in his throat.

"I can't, just-" he weeps looking at this precise point behind me. Jean's eyes shift side to side like he's looking between someone's eyes, searching. I know what's happening but I take a glance over my shoulder just to check. Nothing. "I know, but I c-can't do this right now."

"It's Marco," Annie says softly to me. "He's been seeing him since we got here."

I make a suspicious glance at Annie and try not to be distracted by the fear in her own voice. I ignore it all and pull on Jean's arm again, standing this time.

"Let's get you out of here," I say. Thankfully, Jean stands slowly after me. His shoulders are stiff up to his ears as his arms wrap themselves tight to his body. Another wave of guilt makes me start to feel nauseous.

I watch Jean's eyes as he tries to look away from the spot of nothing, but he keeps looking back and keeps getting hurt. He lets me direct him in front of me and as my hand brushes his shoulder I can feel how badly he's shaking.

I look over at Annie. "Coming?"

She shakes her head, making a calming breath and says, "I'll stay."

For a fleeting moment I don't trust Hanji with Annie if she's in just as much shock as Jean is and is just hiding it better. Once there's a dead body, the humanity in Hanji is razor thin. But it's no job of mine to force Annie to do something just as much as I can't keep Hanji from a crime scene.

With that, I take no time in leading Jean back to the car after telling Hanji that I'm going back into town. As we walk through the woods, Jean keeps his head down and his shoulders high. His head tilts unnaturally like he's trying to block out noise. I assume that Marco is still with him.

I lead Jean along feeling the weight of all of my failures pressing down on my mind like soil over a casket. I didn't believe Jean, and now look, he was right. I didn't believe Armin those years ago, and look what happened then. My ignorance has led to lives lost not once, but twice now. The dirt over this coffin only grows heavier and heavier with each mistake I make, and I don't think I have the strength to keep it from suffocating me much longer.

I let Jean into the cruiser, leaving behind the van so Hanji can bring Annie back. As I get into the driver's seat I notice the vacant gaze that has clouded over the sorrow in Jean's eyes. He looks straight ahead at the burnt remains of the Jaeger cabin. The seven pictures of the victims are still sitting in the grass surrounded by weathered toys and dead flowers.

I don't bother asking him if he's okay, instead I ask him what he's seeing.

He shakes his head and lets his stare linger. His eyes flick towards the side mirror and he closes his eyes.

"Do you think it's happening again?" he asks, his voice rough and weak.

I sigh looking out to the pictures. Historia, Ymir, Sasha, Connie, Reiner, Berthold, and Marco. All these kids would still be alive if it weren't for me.

I start the car and pull off the Jaeger estate feeling my guilt manifest into anger. "I won't let it happen again."