AN: Dear Jesus, I cannot believe I allowed myself to be pulled back into this unholy mess of a fandom. It's like a very unhealthy addiction that I just cannot get rid of. Oh well, at least I came back through Squimpus McGrimpus and not through some other lame ass shipper. The psychological horror in that man's mind is metal as fuck. Anyways, this is a self-insert story written in a sort of 'Found Footage' style story. It focuses mostly on the first three games and the lore found there, with some references to the other games in the franchise. That being said, let the games begin…
Record: A Five Nights at Freddy's Self Insert
First Week: Beginner's Luck
[Static as tape starts]
[Error: Audio Only]
Subject#1: Er…is this thing working…oh, oh yes, it is, the red light is on and everything. Good. That's good. Okay [subject clears throat] Hello, to anyone who may be viewing or listening to these tapes in the future. I am Samu—you know what, don't call me by my slave name, call me by my real name! I am Observer, and I appear to be stuck in a video game!
[Nervous laughter, silence]
Observer: Yeah, I know, that had no context at all, but I didn't get any either. I just went to bed, and then whoosh! Stuck in a place where childhood dreams go to die. Damn you for getting me back into this series, both figuratively and literally, McGrimpus!
…
But enough of blaming another man for my own issues, I better get started on my goddamn shift, otherwise I shall be killed in ways too horrible to imagine!
[Sounds of clicking from security monitor-tablet]
Observer: hookay…let's see…time is…11:54PM…Power is displaying an infinity symbol, but that shall soon change, I believe. And…not enough time to explore surroundings, so let's just…sit here a while. There's a couple of tapes on the desks, but there isn't enough time to watch them. I mean, I could, but they would distract me and then I would probably die. I've also got a flashlight and a…Spring Bonnie mask! Luckly, not spring locked. Could use it to try and fool animatronics, but I don't think it'll work on Foxy.
[silence]
Observer: I need to find a crowbar or something. Anyways, I bet you're just dying to know how I know that I'm in a video game! Well, the thing is…I already tried to leave this place once I knew where it was. Even made it to the front door. Except…there's nothing out there. Not even a black void. There's just…the nothing. I don't know how else to describe it. There was also this memo I can read really quick, since it seems that we have time.
[silence, sound of rustling paper]
Observer: Hookay…[clears throat]…Attention new employee! If you are reading this, then you have accepted our job offer for a night shift security guard! When you complete your first week, you will receive a generous paycheck of $540 dollars…so much better than whatever they were paying the guard in the games…anyways, that's where the memo ends, but it's signed in a job title rather than a name…job title being 'The Manag—!
[phone rings]
Observer: GAH! Shit!
[phone continues to ring]
Observer: Guess I should pick this up…even though I know what the basic message is. I'm going to stop the recording for now. Might pick up when something important happens…or when the shift ends…if I'm still alive by then.
[Whine as tape ends]
[Static as tape starts]
[Error: Audio Only]
Observer: Good news! I'm still alive! Better news! I don't time jump between nights, so I have time to eat and rest, along with searching the pizzeria for anything useful. Anyway, I forgot to mention this in the first entry, but whoever designed this place was kind enough to put a fridge and a bed in the security office. So, in the very least, I won't go hungry…or without sleep. Anyways, it's about…6:10AM. Better get some shut eye.
[Video restored]
[Error: No audio]
A young man in a light purple security guard outfit lies on a small cot in an office. The office has very little room, containing only the cot, a refrigerator, and a desk holding a desk fan, a phone, and the monitor tablet. In one of the doorways stands a shadowy figure, which is far too thin to possibly be human.
[Whine as tape ends]
[Static as tape starts]
[Error: No video]
Observer: Okay…I've had my meal of…lunchmeat and cereal…and an apple, don't forget the apple! It is about…4PM. Bathrooms are accessible, since none of the animatronics are moving at this time. Luckily, found a toothbrush in the supply closet.
[Video restored]
A young man sits on the cot in the security room from the previous tape. His blond hair is tied back into a ponytail, and cloudy eyes are hidden behind a pair of glasses. He begins to speak again.
Observer: Anyway, I also watched some of the tapes, and yeah, they were just some introductory stuff about the office and what we will be doing as security guards—nothing Phone Guy couldn't already tell me. I'm considering taking another look around the area and getting myself further acclimated…especially in the kitchen. I can survive off of the stuff in the fridge for some time, maybe even a whole extra week if I limit myself, but not forever. Gotta see if I can get the door open first. If I can't open the door…better find a crowbar. Or keys. Can't open a door with a flashlight, even if it is a Mag-Lite.
The Observer begins to carry the camera Outlast-style into the hallway and the party room beyond. He takes a moment to stare at the three animatronics on stage.
Observer: All three of them are there, as they should be at this time of...day, or whatever it is.
He turns the camera towards Pirate Cove.
Observer: Foxy's still in there as well.
He turns back towards the kitchen door and tries to twist the knob.
Observer: Damn. Locked.
The Observer turns back towards the stage. Bonnie's head appears to be inclined towards him.
Observer: Hookay…Time to find that crowbar I was thinking of.
The Observer flees back down to the west hallway, stopping in front of the storage closet.
Observer: They can't move, right? Not during the day…but is there a day in this place?
The door is opened. The room on the other side is small, like most storage closets, containing cleaning materials and a ring of keys, along with a crowbar.
Observer: Okay. Good. Very good. Crowbar. Very good crowbar.
The camera is placed on a shelf as the Observer grabs the keys and crowbar, securing the first to his belt and holding the second object in his right hand. He then takes the camera off of the shelf with his left hand and rushes back to the Party Room.
Observer: Come on come on come on still be there still be there still be there—!
All three animatronics are still on the stage. Foxy is still in Pirate Cove.
Observer: Heh heh heh oh thank god!
He quickly walks over to the kitchen door, trying to get one of the keys to work…
Observer: No, no, come on come on!
…but none of them work.
Observer: Fuck! Crowbar, use the crowbar!
Something slides out from under the kitchen doorway. It's a tape marked: Freddy Fazbear Maintenance.
Observer: Okay…okay, who's in the kitche—!
The Observer cuts himself off as he turns the camera around towards the stage. All of the animatronics are looking at him. Their eye sockets are empty, save for small pinpricks of white light.
Observer:…Oh god…ohshit…gobackgobackgoback!
The young man flees back to the security office and closes both doors, unconcerned about the power due to the infinity sign on the monitor-pad.
[Whine as tape ends]
[End Credits Song: The Living Tombstone's Song]
AN: Not my first time in this fandom, but this is the first time I've been back in a long time. I'm going to be focusing a bit more on the psychological horror of the situation, so I hope I do well with that.