So I know that this has been probably written many times over, but I want to try one for myself so here it is, this one would be different I promise as for starters I have no interest in changing all the Damon and Elena scenes to The OC.

Dear Diary,

I don't know why I am writing in it, or writing on you actually but Elena says it helps and when my sister says something it is right cause she is the perfect girl, note the sarcasm. So today is the first day of school and I take this initiative that I will smile and make everyone believe that I am fine totally ignoring the fact that I am totally broken inside. And here it ends, I guess my first diary entry because seriously I cannot write anymore and I suck at it.

Elena Gilbert's sister,

Julia Isobell Gilbert.

The blonde sighed as she got up from where she was curled up in the armchair, her favorite place in the room, and gazed at herself in the mirror, for today she had chosen white jeans, a black top with cuttings some hoop earrings, and sneakers. Julia took a deep breath again, squared her shoulders, put on a fake smile slung her bag over her shoulders, and made her way downstairs.

"Hey, Jess," Jenna, her aunt said, smiling. A fake smile not unlike the rest of them. Jenna was the fun aunt the aunt who you would trust with all of your mischiefs and who would get you champagne but now she was their guardian, even though she was still struggling with her role.

"Morning, Jenna," I replied, smiling back as I forced down the memories of my mother making pancakes on the same table and Grayson,ohh sorry dad smiling at us (read: Elena and Jeremy)

"You want something?" she asked, bustling around the kitchen.

"No, I'm fine. I'll just get something at lunch."

Jenna pointed a rather parental finger at Julia. "You need to be eating more often. Last night, you barely touched your dinner. And it was pizza. Pizza! You love pizza!"

She shrugged nonchalantly. "I wasn't hungry. Jenna, stop worrying about me."

Jenna let out a loud sigh. "I always worry about you. You remind me of me so much when I was of your age."

"Ohh well I am pretty sure I was much cooler than you and more beautiful.." I said with a slightly teasing tone and hating the understanding look Jenna gave me, she knew all about my insecurity issues we both had talked about it after all. I hated it hated how I was jealous of my own sister how I despised her for looking drop-dead gorgeous every second of every day and I hated myself more for hating her. No one could call me ugly with my blonde hair, blue eyes, slim figure, and pale skin but as compared to my sister, I was pretty ugly.

Getting out of her downer mood, she piped up suddenly. "How about toast? I can make toast."

"It's all about the coffee, Aunt Jenna," Elena said, smiling as she entered the kitchen.

Jeremy joined them, already stoned from what Julia could see. And she could practically smell Elena's disapproval.

"Is there coffee?" He took Elena's mug. Said brunette glared at him, while the others simply laughed.

Jenna rooted in her purse. "Your first day of school and I'm totally unprepared. Lunch money?" She pulled out three-five dollars.

"I'm good," Elena assured her.

Jeremy and Julia shot out their hand as they lunged for the money.

Jenna shot both of them a look as Julia got the extra five-dollar and waved it teasingly in front of her little brother.

"Anything else? A number two pencil? What am I missing?"

"Isn't that big presentation today?" Elena asked. Leave it to her to take care of everyone.

"I'm meeting with my thesis advisor at..." She checked the watch on her wrist. "...now. Crap!"

Elena gave her a smile. "Then go. We'll be fine." Jenna nodded gratefully to her and stormed out. "You guys okay?"

Jeremy didn't have time for meaningful chats, apparently. "Don't start."

As Jeremy left and the beauty sighed.

"Leave it alone Elena, everyone has their own way of coping with grief."

"It has been four months Jules if this keeps going on he will destroy his life and I can't let him do that."

"Well, the truth is that you don't get to make decisions anymore for had you listened to Uncle John for once in your life mom would still be with us."

"It was not my mistake," she said, a hint of desperation creeping into her voice." How could I know that the c..car would crash."

I said nothing. There was an awkward silence as none of us spoke anything.

"I am gonna go with Bonnie, "she said.

I shrugged her shoulders. "Me too. I can't wait to see Matt"

"So Grams is telling me I'm psychic," Bonnie, their best friend, rambled as she drove them all to school. "Our ancestors were from Salem, witches and all that, I know, crazy, but she's going on and on about it, and I'm like, but this woman in a home already!"

"Oh, Bonnie, we're all thinking that," Julia said.

Bonnie shot her a look. Despite her constant complaining about her grams, she loved the woman dearly. She didn't like it when anyone but her complained about the eccentric professor. "Anyway... But then I started thinking, I predicted Obama and I predicted Heath Ledger, and I still think Florida will break off and turn into little resort islands... Elena! Back in the car."

Jessica turned back her head to look at Elena, who had a dazed expression on her face as she stared out the window. "I did it again, didn't I? I-I'm sorry, Bonnie. You were telling me that..."

"She's psychic now," Julia told her.

"Right," Elena started. "Okay, then predict something. About me."

Bonnie smiled slightly. "I see..."

Suddenly, a dark object, like a crow, hit Bonnie's front window. The three girls flinched back in their seats. Julia gripped the sides of her seat tightly and looked away from the bird.

"What was that?" Bonnie practically roared. "Oh, my god! Elena, Jess, you guys okay?"

"It's okay. I'm fine," Elena assured the worrying Bennett.

"Julia?" she inquired.

"Drive carefully, okay just do that. No talking." Julia said trying to catch her breath.

Her features softened when she noticed Bonnie was hurt. "Sorry, I-I shouldn't have snapped like that. I'm working on those... uh... issues."

Bonnie nodded and give her an understanding look she was really starting to hate those. "It's okay."

"But seriously," Julia started with a small smile. "We can't be freaked out by cars our entire lives."

"I predict this year is going to be kick-ass," Bonnie said, smiling. "And I predict all the sad and dark times are over and you guys are going to be beyond happy."

"Let's hope so, I cant wait to see Tyler even if he is acting like a douchebag," Elena said with a fond smile. Tyler to Elena was what Matt was to me best friends since diapers, personally, I couldn't understand my sister's choice but I was not going to comment.

"Major lack of male real estate. Look at the shower curtain on Kelly Beech. She looks like a hot- can I still say 'tranny mess'?" Bonnie babbled on

"No, that's over," I state smirking at Kelly condescendingly and flipping my hair.

"Ahh, find a man, coin a phrase. It's a busy year," Bonnie says and I giggle at her.

Elena waves to Matt and he ignores her, causing me to smirk internally.

"He hates me," Elena mopes.

I roll my eyes still looking at Matt.

"That's not hate. That's 'you dumped me, but I'm too cool to show it, but secretly I'm listening to Air Supply's greatest hits.'" Bonnie says.

"Well, I personally don't blame Matthew for holding a grudge," Julia added.

"Well cause you are so good at them." my twin replied helpfully

Caroline, my favorite person, rushes to us.

"Oh my god." Caroline squeals.

She hugs Elena, then me, as I groan internally.

"How are you? Oh, it's so good to see you. How are they? Are they good?"

"Caroline, we're right here. And I'm fine. Thank you," says Elena.

I didn't even bother replying.

"Really?" Caroline asks with a skeptical look on her face.

"Yes. Much better," Elena says.

I and Caroline had a weird friendship although both of us could not tolerate each other we did at times bonded over our insecurities and how we were never the one, she was okay to talk to about boys and other stuff.

"Oh, you poor things," she said then gave us all a group hug.

"Okay, Caroline," Elena says as she pries us from Caroline.

"Oh! Okay, see you guys later?" Caroline says walking away.

"Okay! Bye!" Bonnie says.

"No comment," Elena says.

"I'm not going to say anything," Bonnie defends.

"Bonnie I am going to find Tyler and you and Jules do enjoy," Elena said. Both Bonnie and I were closer than her and Elena which despite the guilt made me smugger. Yup, that's me.

We both shake our heads and chuckled.

"I don't know why she is friends with the guy Jeremy hates the most," Bonnie said.

I simply gave a shrug. We continued walking until we're outside the office and Bonnie stops us.

"Hold up. Who's this?" Bonnie asks.

"All I see is back," I state.

"It's a hot back," Bonnie says and I roll my eyes.

"I'm sensing Seattle, and he plays the guitar," Bonnie says.

"Oh, for crying out loud with your psychic bullshit Bonnie. How long do you keep this going on?."

"Ummm, till I can."

Elena walks out to the field as she tries to search for Tyler and she notices him with Matt's sister and Jeremy.

"Oh shit!" she whispers and she ran and made her way to the trio.

As she approached she heard Vicki say, "Oh Ty, be nice. Be nice. That's Elena's little brother."

To which Tyler replied, "I know who he is. I will still kick his ass.

"Really, why don't you take on someone your own age huh."Elena interrupted as Tyler stopped kissing Vicki something she did not look pleased with.

"Well, well look at you you look terrible done with the fake smile yet," he replied his face set in a smile and smirk .

"Watch it." Jeremy said warningly at the same time Elena said."Don't ask " Tyler ignored the other two as he and Elena embraced."You can have her,"

he called back as Elena hit him in the arm.

"Heard the rumors, there is a new guy in town, Stefan Salvatore. "

"Hmmm never took you for that kind of would be very happy founding family and everything."

"Very funny Elena."They both chuckled.

"So you and Vicki huh... are you really interested in her."

"Hell no my parents would have a heart attack besides she is good in bed."

"You know she has feelings for you. It is wrong to lead her on."

"Just like you lead Matt on..." she sighed.

"Please not now Julia already reminds me every second of every day."

"Not judging but the guy still not over you and just you know you might want to give your brother the stern talk ."

"What? why ..."

"Before I came both of them were just exchanging some medicine..." he purposefully let that sentence trail off and not long after Elena heard a guy called

"Jeremy, good batch man." she snapped her head around towards the bathroom.

"I'll be right back," Juliet heard her ever-too-nosy twin say and stalks to the bathroom. She followed behind her hoping to help Jeremy

"Please be hot," she hears Bonnie say as I followed Elena.

"Whoa! Pants down, chicks!" some guy says as we walk in.

I glare at him and his eyes widen as he turns away from me.

I watch as Elena grabs Jeremy's face, looking into his eyes to see if he's high.

"Great. It's the first day of school and you're stoned," Elena exclaims.

"No, I'm not," Jeremy argues.

"Where is it? Is it on you?" Elena says, checking all over him.

"Jeremy don't you think enough is enough. "I tried to play the big sister.

He ignores me and as Elena continues her search.

"Stop, all right?! You need to chill yourself, all right?" Jeremy says shaking her hands off him.

"Chill myself? What is that, stoner talk?" Elena asks.

"Dude, you are so cool," she says like a stereotypical stoner and goes back to searching him.

"Look, stop! I don't have anything on me. Are you crazy?"

"You haven't seen crazy, Jeremy! I gave you a summer pass, but I am done watching you destroy yourself. No, no, no, you know what? Go ahead. Keep it up. But just know that I am going to be there to ruin your buzz every time, you got it? Jeremy, I know who you are. And it's not this person. So don't be this person," she says.

Juliet chimed in," Jeremy mom and dad would not have wanted this "

"Oh like you ..." he says and ouch that one hurt.

"Jeremy " Elena said scandalized. He just shrugged and went out. I took a deep breath "He didn't mean it Jules he didn't ...he is just going through a phase."

I scowled at her. "Just stop it okay stop. The first time I try to help him and you know what I don't even want to think about it and just stop putting on this face don't act like you care when I know you don't," I said sternly as I made my way out of the men's restroom. I didn't look back knowing I would just see her hurt face. This was my coping method when someone hurt me I hurt other people any person really. Elena dealt with all of this by mourning I am the opposite.

I hate how dysfunctional this family became after our parents dealt with all of us barely keeping it together. Elena would spend hours at our parents' grave, Jeremy took to drugs and alcohol while I became moody, insensitive, and cruel and took all of it out with hate and resentment. Hopefully, there is a light at the end of this tunnel but I just don't see it yet.

After a boring day of lessons, we had history.

With Mr. Tanner.

God save me now.

Me and Mr. Tanner have never got guy was a total douchebag and history lessons were very boring. However this time there was new eye candy in the class, the new student Stefan Salvatore .'Oh my god, he is so hot ." I thought to myself

as I totally checked him out from my seat beside Matt. I texted Bonnie

"The new guy I am calling dibs XOXO" as drowned on and on

"Once our home state of Virginia joined the Confederacy in 1861, it created a tremendous amount of tension within the state. People in Virginia's northwest region had different ideas than those from the traditional deep south. Then Virginia divided in 1862 with the northwest region joining the union..."

"He is staring at Elena XOXO."

"No this time he is mine. "

I texted back determined after today. I will be a new person, a different one someone who is sure of herself, and it will start with me being the Miss Mystic Falls, the head cheerleader, and for once in my life getting the guy.

Hope you guys enjoyed this one. There will be major character development and the final pairing will be a surprise.