Hm ? I don't know you, do I ? Hm... It's weird, I'm pretty sure I know everybody in this- AH ! Of course, what an idiot ! You're the newbies ! It's your first day, isn't it ?
Haha, yes, it's obvious ! You look all fresh and bright !
Me ? I'm from the Student Council, and I have the honor to be here to make sure every one of you finish this year alive !
Hahaha, don't panic, I'm joking ! (Wha- Who dares to doubt my sincerity?!)
Anyway, you absolutely NEED to know you environment, and nothing better for this than to learn to know the freak- THE CHARMING PROFESSORS who compose it !

Onodera Ritsu, said « Mister Denial »

Age : 29 years old. Yes, I know, he doesn't look like it. Especially when he blushes : he's closer to a 14 year-old middle-schooler, then again, it's not his fault ! Besides, you'd better get used to it, you have yet to meet the Biology teacher !

Family Status : Rich kid. WHAT ?! It's the truth ! He's rich kid, that's it ! Son of Onodera Publishing's CEO and rightful heir of the company ! That's all ! I must admit that he doesn't seem to talk that much with his old man, but his mother is calling him every day, at this point I'm pretty sure it's harassment. By the way, if his phone starts to ring during class, big chances are that it's her, and then I pray for you that she won't try to discuss marriage with him, otherwise, without earplugs, you won't make it out alive...

Position : English Teacher. He has spent a big part of his younger years in England, at a fancy private school, but surprisingly enough, he's the only professor who won't rub his achievements into your face. In fact, he's pretty objective in regard to his skills. (Which is probably the only thing that he's objective about... Gh- er- let's go back to the important stuff!)

Other activities : He's in charge of the Self-Defence Introduction Club. Ha ! I can see you, laughing like hyenas ! He doesn't look like it, but he could kick your sorry butts without breaking a sweat ! You need to understand that, as a rich kid, he has gone through everything : from extortion to kidnapping attempt as well as physical and psychological harassment (also sexual harassment, but this one is pretty new)... At some point, he decided to learn to protect himself, and god, did he learn well ! He has mastered a dozen or martial arts, including aïkido and judo, which makes his kitten-like looks even more dangerous, just ask the Spanish teacher !

Appearance :

-Chestnut hair, cut in some sort of bowl cut that suits him remarkably well. Some wild strands always fall before his eyes, which gives him a kind of rebellious look, but really, it's barely noticeable. You may, at some point, feel like running your fingers through his shining, soft-looking hair... DO NOT PROCEED ! It's a one-way ticket toward your DEATH (Spiritually speaking : your soul will be drained out of your body by some external player whose identity I cannot reveal for fear of suffering this exact fate just be aware that being too handsy with this adorable teacher is dangerous.)

-Green eyes, some will say they're sparkling, others may argue that they're deep and filled with love, but in the end it's up to you to decide ! However, don't try to take a closer look at them or you may start to see the Math Teacher everywhere, lurking around like some evil spirit waiting for you to put your guard down in order to subject you to his completely unfair rage ! (I'm NOT scared ! I'm shivering from the cold...) Those marvelous orbs have the misfortune to be coupled with the biggest dark circles you've ever seen, which will push you to reconsider your plans for the future.

-Now, about his « aura », it gets complicated. One morning, he will appear to you as a perfectly normal human being, calm, sweet, with his hair combed and his shirt spotless. The following day, he'll barge in looking half dead, in clothes way too big for him and completely incapable of walking straight. Those days, the class will consist in mubbling and cursing (all strangely directed at someone called « fucking Masamune »), all in english of course, as professionalism require.

Character :

-I can already assure you of one thing : Onodera-sensei will surely be one of your favorite teachers. Simply put, he's part of the very small group of professors who see the miserable and ignorant fools that you are as actual human beings. Oh, I wouldn't say that the others despise you... Onodera-sensei is simply one of the very few who refuse to participate in the competition launched by the Foreign Literature teacher whose goal is to have the most first-year students in tears by the end of the first day of class. So, yeah, Onodera-sensei is an angel sent on Earth to bless us all, believe me.

-Onodera-sensei is a sweet-tempered, strong-willed, truly nice man... Until the Math Teacher shows up with his sexy glasses. From then on, the very polite and supportive young man we all love turns into a moo box, but instead of the soothing mooing of a cow, it's a stream of sentences starting with « Takano-san » and ending with « you big pervert », the latter's laughter overlapping the whole tantrum. To be fair, if Takano-sensei didn't interrupt the class out of nowhere to come and grope our dear professor EVERY SINGLE DAY, this same professor wouldn't be so inclined to throw him out the window. (What is it ? Oh no, Takano-sensei is fine, he's pretty used to it now. Yes, I know, Onodera-sensei's classroom is on the fifth floor...)

-The real problem with Onodera-sensei is that, despite his unlimited kindness, he seems to be at war with the very concept of honesty. You see, according to the informations that several innocent students collected at the risk of their life, our dear teacher might have gone through some serious trauma when he was young which, in addition to render him partially jaded by life –the day the cherry trees of the campus started to blossom, he spent his whole three-hour class explaining how much « love is a lie meant to let human beings think that their sad and tasteless lives are meaningful » needless to say that the depressive wave that has soon followed has forced the Student Body to forbid any mention of the word « love » within 100 meters around the english teacher, much to the relief of – , has revealed in him unmatched talent for insincerity. (For example, he keeps denying his involvement in the destruction of the faculty lounge's vending machine, even though he was definitely the one who threw the kettle at the Biology teacher's head.)

Marital Status :

Engaged. Sort of. For the second time. The funny part being that he has chosen his first fiancee to be his maid of honor at his marriage. Sweet, sweet irony... It took quite some time to reach this point in his relationship with the Math teacher. Imagine : ONE YEAR to realize he was in love with Takano-sensei, add 6 months to admit they were a couple, and two more years to finally accept the marriage proposal and- (Aaaaaannnd please tell me that wasn't Kisa-sensei behind the door's glass a second ago ! It was, wasn't it ? I'm dead.)

Relationships :

-As strange and contradictory as it may seem, Onodera-sensei's best friend is none other than the Biology teacher, Kisa-sensei. In fact, despite their diametrically opposed personalities, those two are inseparable since the very first day of Onodera-sensei at MU. It is said that when Kisa-sensei met him for the first time, he instantly became fond of "the newbie with the lifeless eyes" that he was and took him under his wing. Unfortunately for Onodera-sensei, being this professor's BFF comes with finding yourself involved in all sorts of suspicious jokes that -veeeeery often- get them in trouble.

-Haitani-sensei, the Spanish Teacher. Their relationship is pretty strange : Haitani-sensei used to be jealous of the attention that the english teacher was getting from their math-loving colleague, but despite that, Onodera-sensei never seemed to bear a grudge against him on this matter. But this situation had to come to an end at some point, a point that was reached, if you believe the rumor, as a consequence of a heated argument between the two lovebirds, since it ended with the spanish teacher flying through a hallway. Since then, the latter keeps his distance, probably for safety reasons.

-Luckily, if there is one relationship that has evolved for the best, it's the one between him and the Math teacher. Even if there had been highs and lows in their relationship for a long time, today they are happily engaged, even though their antics remained the same. In fact, it isn't uncommon to find our cute professor and his colleague arguing in the middle of the hallway, usually on really trivial matters. (You will however be extremely disappointed to hear that the argument revolve around the fact that « somebody could have caught us », as you will realize what you just missed.)

Conclusion : A particularly nice and devoted teacher that will make you want to give him a big hug... as long as his husband-to-be isn't around ! Otherwise... you better watch out !