"Ughh, that could have gone really badly!"
Himawari and I had just exited the teacher's office. I get called down there all the time, but it was rare for goody-two-shoes Himawari to get sent there with me. Apparently, the teacher was suspicious that we were cheating together on yesterday's take home exam. I had gotten high marks despite 'sleeping in every lecture', as she so kindly put it.
Sensei had looked at our exams side-by-side and saw that many of our answers were the same. Even the wrong ones. Thankfully, I was able to convince her that it was because Himawari and I had studied together earlier. In the end, she let us off with a warning after lecturing us about the importance of academic honesty.
"I can't believe Sensei saw my amazing grades and immediately assumed I had cheated. I, the great genius Sakurako, always do well on exams!" I proclaimed to the world.
As we continued walking, I waited for a snide retort about my intelligence from Himawari. But… she didn't say anything. In fact, Himawari hadn't said anything since we left the teacher's office.
"Sensei can be such a drag sometimes, right Himawari?" I said, gently nudging her with my elbow.
"Sakurako…"
Cold. Her voice was cold.
"What's up, Himawari?" I said with a nervous chuckle.
Himawari turned to me, disappointment etched into every feature on her face.
"How did you get the answers to my take home exam?"
Gulp.
"I specifically told you that I wouldn't let you copy my answers for this assignment. You promised me that you would do it yourself."
"Well, yes… but -"
"You PROMISED." she said through clenched teeth as she took a step towards me.
"I did do it myself!" I stammered.
"Oh really?"
She took another step towards me, forcing me towards the wall.
"Yes! Most of it. Half of it. Maybe less."
Nervous words poured out of my mouth like a waterfall of self-incrimination.
"I thought it was strange that my take home exam was in front of my notebooks instead of in between like I usually arrange them. I was truly, truly hoping that I put it in like that. But no, it was you, wasn't it."
I needed to choose my next words carefully. Otherwise she might never let me copy her homework again.
"Alright, it was me!" I confessed.
Himawari stared at me, crossing her arms indignantly. She seemed unfazed by my admission of guilt.
"I'm sorry, Himawari."
Her face softened a little after hearing my apology. Nice one, Sakurako! Time to bring it home.
"I'm sorry for copying your answers and getting us in trouble with the teacher. I'll be more careful next time -"
Instant regret. I could tell from the second those words left my mouth that I had made a huge mistake. Any trace of forgiveness present in Himawari's demeanor disappeared without a trace.
"Are you kidding me Sakurako?!" she shouted.
"I said I was sorry!" I said meekly.
Himawari was shaking. Her hands were balled up in fists. At this point, I would prefer if she punched me and we called it even. I had a feeling that Himawari wasn't going to let me off that easy though…
"You didn't just copy my answers. You took my test out of my bag while I was away, without my permission. That's STEALING. That's wrong! You know that's wrong! I just… I can't even fathom why you would think that's okay!"
"I know it sounds really bad when you put it that way, but -"
"But what, Sakurako? Yesterday, I said no, you can't cheat off of me. You did it anyway. What possible explanation could you have for that, other than you not having any respect for my wishes?"
"Himawari, I -"
"And then in the teacher's office, you couldn't even bring yourself to tell the truth to Sensei. We got lucky today. But what if she didn't believe you, and she failed both of us? Called our parents? Forced us into remedial class?"
"None of that happened though!"
My stomach was churning. Of course I respected Himawari, why was she acting like I had shoved her face into a pile of dirt? I made a mistake, and this was the result. If only I had just done the assignment myself. What was I even doing last night?
"Sakurako."
Himawari spoke my name, coldly enunciating each syllable. I had never seen her like this. This was completely different from our usual bickering and name-calling.
"Hi, that's me…"
My attempt to lighten the mood failed. I braced myself for the coming storm.
"You're lazy. You're irresponsible. You never study; I have to spend every night before every exam with you. You eat everyone's food without so much as a thank you. You lounge around the student council room while Sugiura, Ikeda, and I do all of the work. I know you think no one minds, but believe me, they do. You're such a burden, Sakurako! "
I had to endure this. Himawari needed to vent. But it hurt, hearing all of this from my best friend.
"You're selfish. Completely blind to the feelings of the people around you. You take advantage of my kindness day after day. You promise to improve and you never do. You -"
She was crying, unable to speak through her tears. I wanted to reach out and hold her, promise her I would make things right. But I was too ashamed. I didn't know what to do.
"You make me smile harder and laugh louder than anyone. Even though we bicker all the time, I really do enjoy being around you. But after today… I think I need a break."
I stared at her as she began to walk away, dumbfounded at her words.
"Himawari!" I called out to her. "What do you mean? What are you saying?"
She turned to face me one last time.
"I'm saying goodbye, Sakurako."
I watched helplessly as Himawari disappeared down the stairwell, like a vanishing dream. And just like that, on a day like any other, I lost my closest friend.