So yeah, I published this in AO3, but fanfiction NEEDS some more Legosi&Haru content.
The thing is easy, I mean, the summary says everything you need to know. The rest is right here.
READ THIS BEFORE READING:
-This story is a little AU, because Louis, in here, is Beastar.
DISCLAIMER: BEASTARS does NOT belong to me, nor this image for this story. It belongs to みー.
Please, enjoy!
The fallen cradle
After everything that happened, Haru wanted to believe that Rex was going to give them a chance; the possibility to have a future together; that they'd conceive one day… and have that miracle. And they did success. When the doctors confirmed her suspicion, and she told Legosi, they were terrified… but so happy at the same time.
They really doubted the chances, since the size difference was a little alarming if she were to conceive their child, and the wolf feared for her safety almost all the time, so the fact that even their unborn child could hurt his little girlfriend's body, it scared him to death. However, Louis offered to pay the most prestigious doctors to take care of Haru's pregnancy, and make the process easier.
Since rabbits and wolves had different gestation periods, it was uncertain when it was going to be born, and Haru struggled with all of it. She was already small, so when her belly got bigger than she expected, she was both excited and scared.
They were following the doctors' instructions perfectly.
So, why?
Rex gave her and Legosi this wonderful miracle, yet, there were people who couldn't bear that being to exist.
She remembered pain; in her back, in her head… in her belly. Then she felt wet between her legs. She tried to keep herself awake and widened her eyes as she saw blood.
Her already wet eyes shed the angsty tears as her shaky hands touched her stomach. She could feel that life… slipping away from her fingertips…
She cried out in pain as she heard Legosi's voice calling her, but she couldn't see anything through the tears. She sobbed and her ears and nose twitched in both agony and horror of what was happening. She wanted Legosi, she wanted her child, she wanted this day to never happen.
Haru felt some bigger hands than hers gently picking her up, but she knew they weren't Legosi's. She could never forget his hands. She glanced at his direction, and her heart sank at the scene: the police was restricting him while he struggled, suppressing the growls that threatened to come out from his muzzle. There was blood in his clothes, too…
But it wasn't hers.
The next time she opened her eyes, she felt like she had slept years, her body was stiff, and her limbs weighted more than she remembered, or she was weaker. Just her luck.
She recognized the antlers that were in her white room. She blinked.
"… Louis."
"I'm glad you're okay." Was the first thing the Beastar said. And Haru knew he meant it.
"…. Wh-What…"
"Don't." He felt his gentle hand on her shoulder. "You need to rest."
"I think… I've slept enough." She grumbled. "What happened?" asked louder.
His ears drifted to the back, and he grimaced, avoiding her eyes. Haru wasn't sure why Louis was pitying her in these circumstances. She tried to move, but a pang of pain crossed her abdomen, and she briefly grazed her flat stomach with it…
And she finally realized what happened.
Her mind started working rapidly and everything came back: those animals, the pain, Legosi losing control, pain, pain, pain…
And blood.
She brought both her hands to her belly, and started shaking.
"… is it…?" she started, and she surprised herself for her tone; she sounded awfully calmed. "… am I…?"
"You're going to be fine." He said, not sure if she was asking that.
"… did it survive?"
Haru contemplated the raw and disgusting remorse in Louis' eyes. Despite what everyone could think, even if she doubted it once, she knew that there was one time Louis did love her in the past. And for that past love, he appreciated her a lot, she knew that. And she loved him too, but right now…
The last thing she needed was him, the great Beastar, giving her a pity look.
"Haru…-"
"Tell me." She gritted her teeth. "Now."
He frowned, then turned directly at her.
"… It was a boy. I'm really sorry."
She expected herself to feel something; pain, loss, hate… she expected to cry her eyes out. But she didn't… she felt numb. The reality of the situation hit her in the face and she suppressed a shiver, but she couldn't bring herself to feel anything.
She was too weak to do so.
"… Where's Legosi?"
"At the police station."
"He didn't do anything they didn't deserve." She muttered, and Louis narrowed his eyes, staring at her without saying anything.
"I can get him out before night. But I'll need your testimony." Haru glared at him, wanting him to leave her alone. "I won't force you now to talk, don't worry, that can wait to…"
"I want them dead."
He widened his eyes.
It almost felt like those years at Cherryton. Haru's white fur looked like the cold light room, as if she was part of it; part of its stillness… she looked so fragile.
"However, I know that's something Legosi wouldn't want." She muttered. "Just… bring them to jail… and make sure they don't ever escape."
Legosi cried.
Haru had seen him cry so many times, but this time was different. He was wailing, howling in pain. He grasped her with his big and dangerous claws, but she didn't feel threatened nor scared of him. She doubted that this big bad wolf that had been wetting her chest could ever hurt her again. At least, physically.
She hated herself.
She hated those zebras who couldn't understand that the world was changing and carnivores and herbivores could cohabit in peace, and have a family too.
She hated herself for still not feeling the raw loss that her boyfriend was feeling right now.
She hated the comments from the nurses outside, feeling glad that an abomination like that wasn't able to take a living breath in this world.
She hated Louis' pity gaze.
She hated it.
She hated this…
She just wished Legosi could pierce her body with his claws, bite her neck and end this.
She couldn't believe she wasn't even good to be a mother. And she wouldn't be one. Ever.
The doctors had warned her. They said that, if she had this child, there was the possibility of her dying, or her unable to have more children. They assured her the second option was the most possible one, and she didn't mind. As long as she had a family with Legosi, she didn't mind. At least, if they only had one…
Her uterus now was completely useless.
What kind female was she, then?
"Haru… Haru, please, forgive me." His broken voice snapped her out of her mental wreck.
The dwarf rabbit closed her eyes. She had been hearing this since he arrived, he didn't even change his clothes to see her. He got out of jail and came immediately to see her. When he saw her, then her body, he broke down.
She caressed his torn ear slowly, and she pressed her head on his, not replying. She knew that if she ever tried to assure him it wasn't his fault, it would only make him feel worse. So she let him cry while she petted his head, his ears and muzzle. She wondered how many tears he had left, she wasn't sure how much they had been in that position. Her arms felt a little stiff, but she didn't mind.
At least, she was finally feeling something beside the numbness and the heavy chest.
Eventually, Legosi stopped crying, but his eyes were red and puffy. He looked exhausted, and she suggested him to rest, but he just shook his head, rejecting her offer. She didn't insist. They stayed silent for a while, until Haru spoke.
"… It was a boy. We agreed that we wanted it to be a surprise until…" she stopped for a brief moment, and she noticed his eyes filling up with fresh new tears. "I wanted to ask if I could see him once, but… I wanted to ask you first."
He flinched and his hands grabbing the blankets of her stretcher started shaking.
"… I'm sorry…" she started, but his voice gently interrupted her.
"Do you think… they'll let us?"
"I hope so. I… want to say goodbye." She admitted.
Legosi stared at her, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him now.
"D-Do you want me to ask?"
She nodded and he saw him exit her room.
The morgue was cold.
They were just going to see him. They couldn't touch him. Haru was being carried by Legosi, who didn't mind. The doctor offered her a wheelchair, but she rejected the idea. She needed her wolf to be as close to her as possible to see this. The doctor, who was a tiger, glanced at them one last time, then removed the sheets.
Haru's ears stood still, alert, while she felt against her back Legosi's fast and strong heartbeat.
It seemed like the nurses didn't even touch him when they removed it from her, she thought.
His position was still curved, fetal. It didn't have much fur, but the little he had was light gray, and his ears looked like Legosi's, though they looked a little longer. The smalls curled hands didn't let her see if they had claws or not, and from their position, she couldn't see very well his tail.
It was big for a rabbit like her, but still looked so small…
… and it was the most beautiful being she had ever seen in her life.
Her ears lowered and closed her eyes for a few seconds.
Then, she opened them and the ears stood up.
She thanked the doctor and asked Legosi to bring her back to her room. He did it without replying. He was about to place her gently in the stretcher again, but she grabbed him and shook her head.
"Let's just stay like this for a while."
She saw him about to protest, but he finally didn't refuse her wish. After all, neither of them had the energy to get away from each other. He sat back in the chair they gave him while he stayed in Haru's room and hugged her softly.
Haru's mind drifted to the first time she met Legosi; she remembered the fear, the resignation. The Haru she pictured back then didn't feel like life was enough for her; she was just living, and she wanted to know her purpose to genuinely want to live. But she didn't.
Then she remembered the Shishigumi. She had been petrified in fear, she remembered the humiliation, the naked horror laughing at her misery, and the angst that even if she didn't value her life enough, she still grasped to that ray of hope to… keep on living.
Then, Melon came to mind. The way his eyes pierced to her soul, trying to figure out who and how she was, so he could taste her being in every way possible.
After all those things she went through, she wanted to live. And she still wanted to; she wanted to have a pleasant and simple life with Legosi by her side…
But now, she felt… dead.
She couldn't even move herself, Legosi was holding her firmly but not strong enough to hurt her.
She couldn't feel anything from this.
This was horrible. This was a tragedy, and she knew that; she knew this was hurtful; she knew Legosi was suffering… so why wasn't she?
All she could feel right now was hate towards those animals that hurt her to make her lose her baby… and hate towards herself.
She was so selfish. After everything, all this grudge was still nagging her. She wasn't enough, she never was strong… but those faults weren't important right now. She needed to pick up the pieces of Legosi's heart and place it back together. She had to.
She didn't have time to think about herself.
When she came back home, they had tons of visits.
First, they were visited by Gosha. Haru had to admit it was the most pleasant one of them all. He just came and didn't say anything. He just hugged both of them and cried for them. Since she was still weak from the incident, Gosha held her for a brief period of time, fearing of hurting her with his poison. The komodo dragon gently wiped the zones where he touched her and suggested her to take a bath, just in case. And she did, but just to leave Legosi in his grandfather's arms. She curled herself into a ball in the bathroom, spending a good time below the water. She remembered she had seen the stiches of her belly. They had to shave her white fur to take him out, and now, she stared at the pink skin along with the weird marks that, hopefully, wouldn't leave her body.
The second visit was a little overwhelming; her parents visited. Her mother cried and cried… and, gosh, cried. Her siblings didn't say anything, they just moved around the house cleaning and cooking for her and Legosi, knowing they weren't in the right state of mind to do anything. They were small things, but both of them appreciated those efforts. However, Haru felt even smaller because of her father's somber look on her. She even saw him talk with Legosi outside. She didn't ask what they were talking about, and it didn't seem like her boyfriend was going to share it with her either.
Louis and Juno came too, and Haru refused to talk to the red deer, so she spent time with Juno and had a bath together, while Louis and Legosi talked about… whatever, she didn't care. She didn't flinch when the female wolf cleaned her stitches carefully and wept for a while.
Legosi's friends, from Cherryton in the 701 room, came too. Haru always smiled whenever she saw them, however, they looked sad, their tails never wagged when they saw Legosi, and they tried unsuccessfully, to cheer them up.
Sebun and Zaguân came to give them some food too. While the female sheep acted more concerned for them, the dwarf rabbit preferred the seal calm attitude over everything.
Still, Haru just wanted to be left alone with Legosi.
She had nightmares.
Not only did she remember the day she was attacked by those stupid zebras, but she remembered all the times she felt threatened too.
Instead of fleeing, she had nightmares of Legosi actually killing her. Haru didn't share those dreams with him. It wasn't his fault that her mind was breaking. She dreamed of the Shishigumi, especially that boss that threatened to eat her slowly. She'd lose her fingers gradually, until he'd rip her ears, then her tail… there was pain everywhere.
… But she didn't have nightmares of Melon.
She'd only dream about him, talking to her while the rabbit stared at him. A half-breed like that could live healthy and get so big, uh…
But that same half-breed was a criminal, a murderer… and was in prison. She didn't know much about him, but… now she was really curious. If he turned out like that, why did that happen? Was it because he was a hybrid? If she had her child… would it have turned like that?
Those last thoughts… terrified her even more than the nightmares where she was devoured.
After a couple of weeks, Haru started working again. Legosi had insisted she needed more rest, but she didn't want to be caged in her home any longer. She was sick of it, and she needed to distract herself. She tried to act as normal as possible around the wolf; she smiled and joked around him, but somehow, that didn't work. Legosi would still stare at her with deep sadness in his eyes, he would hug her while she was laying in their bed, and she wasn't sure if he was trying to find comfort in her… or was it backwards?
She wasn't that broken.
Unlike her, Legosi looked heartbroken, almost all the time. That was why she wanted to be around him, making him happy before that happened. Still, the wolf was sad all the time. The dwarf rabbit wasn't stupid, she heard him cry a few times in the bathroom, or while she was pretending to sleep. She hated seeing him this way, but she wasn't sure how to heal his heart anymore.
Was it going to be like this from now on? Was this… useless?
One night, she tried to have sex with him.
If felt like the first time they met.
He was confused and terrified at the idea, but he didn't have to be, right? It wasn't like he could get her pregnant anymore. Those thoughts killed the mood, so they just laid there, nuzzling each other naked. Haru thought this was better than try to make him feel pleasure for a brief period of time until the cruel reality struck them back again.
Her temper was getting worse.
It wasn't explosive, but she knew herself enough to know there was something wrong.
She hated it.
Sha hated those herbivores that thought they had the right to kill their unborn child. She hated being so weak… but she couldn't feel bigger, nor stronger.
It was like all those years back all over again.
She remembered using males to feel herself like an equal; even being a sex toy for them, the this was for her benefit; to feel alive and worth. It was better than being pitied; better than being treated in a hypocrite way by others.
Now, she was craving for some intimate touch from her wolf just to… feel something.
The numbness in her body was overwhelming during the day; so, in the night, she tried, so many times, to seduce him; to please him. The first nights were a waste, but after a pair of weeks, she was able to have sex with him.
Even thinking that this pleasure would be limited, and they'd be back to their mourning state, at least Legosi would, she didn't mind. She needed to feel something more besides just living. She wanted to genuinely smile again, so why couldn't she?
Legosi always embraced her with so much love; sometimes, he did it carefully, then there were other times when he'd let his intimate instincts and take her rougher. All of that, was surrounded by love; that powerful yet frail love that Legosi felt for her.
And she loved him too…
Right?
Her dark eyes welled up with tears.
"Haru?"
She was worthless.
Worthless, worthless, worthless…
"Haru, what's wrong?"
She was succumbing to this numbness so much that she couldn't even be sure if she loved this wolf anymore. Was she using him? Was she trying to get rid her problems while Legosi was suffering? Was she putting her weakness over his pain?
She wasn't worth anything.
She didn't deserve him.
She was a disgusting and shameless female that used males for herself. She didn't know how to love someone. She couldn't love herself; couldn't appreciate her family's concern; couldn't love this wolf; couldn't…
She couldn't… feel after her unborn child was cruelly killed.
The dwarf rabbit blinked and glanced up at Legosi. She had her blouse open, showing her white bra as she sat against the wall. The wolf was leaning towards her, his claws grazing the buttons of her cloth, but he immediately stopped when he saw her face.
"Do you want me to stop? Did I hurt you?"
She shook her head at his last question, but Legosi buttoned back her blouse anyway. He helped her get up and her eyes stared at his. He looked tired, his tail barely wagged anymore. And yet, he looked so big and strong.
Even broken, he looked so strong.
Haru considered asking him to kill her.
She almost did when she took his right clawed-hand in her small white hands, and got it near her chest. She considered pleading him to pierce her heart to finally feel something. But Haru knew better. Her mind wasn't okay, and these thoughts would only bring more pain to both of them, specially Legosi. Instead, she pressed his knuckles between her breasts, so he could feel her heart beating.
Even with the Back-Alley Market fallen to the ground, Gouhin's clinic was intact. She didn't even announce she was coming, nor did she tell Legosi she was going to visit the panda. She knew about him when Legosi told her a panda-friend helped him to rescue her from the Shishigumi, however, that was it. The only thing she got from this character afterwards, it was that he was a psychotherapist or something like that from the old market.
So…
She opened the door and glanced around the place. It looked dreary, but she didn't care. She had been in worse situations than this one. After long walks, she finally busted into his office, startling him.
"Who the fuck dares…?!"
The big bear abruptly stopped when he saw the small white rabbit frowning determined at his direction. He dropped the cigarette from his lips and sniffed deeply.
"You're Legosi's mate."
"I am." She still vowed her head. "I never met you, but I knew Legosi helped you to save me years ago. So I'm grateful."
"I didn't do it for you."
"I know." That comment seemed to interest him. "You did it for him, that's why I'm grateful to you. We both would've died if you hadn't come along with him. He was safe because of you."
He deeply frowned at her.
"I heard it from Legosi. I'm sorry for your loss."
"I need you to treat me." She avoided his condolences.
"Why? You're nothing to me. Just a bunny coming to my office unannounced asking for something that you only can fix."
"But I can't do it alone."
"He's by your side."
"For that reason, I can't let him see me like this anymore." She gritted her teeth. "I know he's hurting whenever he sees me. Because I can't feel the pain he felt, I was just hurt physically. And I need to fix that."
The panda was silent for a few moments, then stood up.
"You want some tea?"
She agreed without a doubt. Legosi didn't like this bamboo tea, but it had a soothing flavor. At least, it was like that for her. Was it because she was an herbivore?
"You're misunderstanding it, rabbit." He finally talked after some silent sipping. She raised her head and her ears stood erect and still. "You're mourning as much as Legosi." She was about to protest, but the panda growled at her. "Don't interrupt me. This kind of tragic acts affect people in a different kind of way, it depends on the individual. Legosi, even with his poker miserable face, is pretty sensitive, and we both know that. You, on the other hand…" He stopped, then placed his cup on the table. "I met you just a few minutes ago and I already can perceive a heavy inferiority complex you have." She frowned. "And you know it."
"Does it have to do with how I'm coping with this?"
"Indeed. Your reaction came from a traumatizing event. Legosi told me they threw you, literally threw you so you fell to your stomach." She flinched at the memory. "Pain accompanied with something shocking can induce you to think you're not hurting, but you are in a different way from Legosi. Since yours is so different, you think he's suffering more than you're. But I think it's in backwards."
Haru wasn't sure to believe that. Legosi used to look so happy and confident after the Turf War. Then, after what happened to her, it seemed the scared and timid wolf she once knew was back. She thought it was her fault, that was why she tried to act like she was…
Oh.
"You're realizing, right? You're so much smarter than Legosi. What the hell did ya see in him anyway?" He shrugged, though he didn't expect and answer from her, she still talked.
"He never saw me with pitiful eyes. He thought of me as an equal, even though he was so much stronger and bigger than me, even if he could eat me someday… he treasured me more as a being."
"Uh, whatever. It's not like I care."
She squinted her eyes, staring at the tea, then she looked back at the panda.
"I think I understand, it may take some time, I think I'll be able to handle it."
"Hmph, Legosi's right. You're strong-minded, more than him, at least." He left his empty cup in the table. "But consider this: this is not about who's having a harder time grieving. Both of you matter, stop thinking bullshit about the other's pain is more important than your own."
"Yes."
"Oh, and just so you know…" He smirked. "Legosi is more observant than you think."
Her ears stood tall in confusion, but she didn't press his words any further. However, there was one thing she needed to do before starting this.
"Can I have a schedule to talk with you?"
"You want a treatment from a panda that treated carnivores who used to eat meat?" He mocked.
She smiled.
"Oh, you know, I like bizarre things."
He chuckled.
"I like you, girl. Alright, you can have this…" he handed her a paper to fill. "Then you can visit me next week to tell me when you want to start."
"Mm… thank you."
Without anything else to say, Haru vowed and left the room slowly. Gouhin saw her leave and took another cigarette.
He knew she was about to snap. She already recognized there was something wrong with her. Those caged emotions were about to escape. It was a matter of time.
Haru walked down the stairs and beside the officer. She was a lioness and asked one last time if she wanted to go in, and Haru just sent her a glare. The big female sighed and opened the door for her. When she stepped inside, she saw him.
Melon was chained, and had a weird muzzle in his face, since the shape of it was a little odd, it seemed like they made one just for him to fit. The half-breed glanced up and looked right at her.
"Ah… it's you…"
She should be scared. This was the criminal that almost killed Legosi not once, but many times. He had killed many other animals; innocent animals. He leaded the Shishigumi and almost conquered the Back-Alley Market. And, of course, he had wanted to eat her.
However, she was glad he was still here.
Alive.
She walked towards him.
"Hey." She greeted.
He squinted his eyes at her, contemplating her form.
"My, my… don't you look skinnier? I thought you wanted to be a good taste~"
She let him talk; it was weird that no matter how disturbing his words were, she still wanted to talk to him.
"You're the one to talk." She replied. It seemed they didn't give him much food in this place, or maybe he didn't want to eat at all.
Even with the muzzle on, she saw him smiling at her, his teeth showing.
"What are you doing here? You smell funny." Haru guessed he was referring to her medicine. After all, her body didn't react the best way, and she had been asked to take a list of pills that would help her to heal faster… or so they said.
She narrowed her eyes and stared right back him, determined.
"… I was pregnant. I was going to give birth to a half-breed like you." She said. He dropped the grin off his face. "But I couldn't. I was hurt by some people who didn't like my relationship with my boyfriend, and I lost him. It was going to be a male."
The half-gazelle held his cold gaze in her, and she didn't mind. He leaned to her face, and the rabbit could smell the weird material of the muzzle. Steel?
"That's good."
Haru felt a knot in her throat, but she wasn't that surprised of his response.
"Why would we want more freaks in this society?" He grinned again, and opened a little his mouth. She wasn't sure what he was trying to do, but she shrugged.
"I don't know… I just wanted to have him."
"Why would you want that?" He suddenly cackled at his own question, and she flinched a little. "Those animals did you a favor, actually. Your precious baby was going to die anyways!"
She had pictured it many times. If they ever had a child, she knew their kid was going to suffer. Everything was changing, but hostility wasn't one of them, and she always wondered: was it worth making him live that life?
But…
"But I wanted to be a good mother of a half-breed." She whispered. "Because I love Legosi so much."
His ears perked at that.
"I love Legosi, so much that… if he were to eat me someday, I would let him." She shrugged. "I meant what I said when you were my teacher, for herbivores and carnivores to cohabit, they must face each other with everything they have. Legosi tried to kill me, and I ran away… now, he wants me as a female, and I want him as a male too. He loves me, and I love him. I felt the need to share this… that was why I wanted to have his child." She went to grab one of his hands. They had cut his claws, and she caressed his fingers. "I realized this when I found out you were a half-breed, you know?" she confessed.
Melon didn't move.
"I was so thrilled at the idea that, a half-breed like you, could grow so much, that you could even have a PhD, that you've come so far… Maybe, I pictured you as… my kid."
Haru wasn't sure what was going through Melon's head, but she already said what she wanted to say. Honestly, she felt lighter, like she just got free from a heavy luggage. She wanted to retreat, thinking her words didn't mean much to him, but she still wanted him to know. He was one of the main reasons she dreamed of being a mother, after all.
She froze when his arms, still chained, went above her to trap her in a weird hug. Her nose twitched in fear and her ears stood erect in alarm, but then, she heard it:
"Mama."
It wasn't the memories, it wasn't the memory of Legosi's worried eyes looking at her. It wasn't none of those things that finally made her snap.
That single word awoke, mercilessly, all her locked-up emotions… the trauma and horror of the pain, the blood, so much blood… the shock and grief of losing her child; their child!... The corpse at the morgue… the nightmares… the dead weight… she wasn't…
She couldn't bring more life to the world anymore.
That little beautiful creature she saw there, lying in the cold morgue wasn't going to wake up, ever, to grow up and smile at her… and call her…
. . .
Legosi's blood turned cold when he sensed Haru's scent nearby, but it was mixed with someone else's; it belonged to someone he knew well and would never forget. However, when he almost jumped out of his apartment, he flinched when he saw the dwarf rabbit entering their home as if nothing happened. What caught her attention was her ears. They were droopy, but they raised a little when she looked at him.
"… I'm home."
It had been a while since the last time he saw such a transparent expression coming from her. It killed him these last months when Haru was trying to play a façade of being okay. At first, he thought that she wanted to move on, so both could overcome this, but he had learned how to read a little better his beloved. She never talked about it, almost as it never happened, and tried to erase it from her memory, or that was the impression that it gave him. But her eyes…
He loved her eyes so much.
Those dark eyes looked like the nocturne sky, and loved staring at them for a long time. But this last time had been hard, because those eyes looked lifeless, dull. He hated being so weak to not to understand her feelings to the extent of make her hide them from him.
He gulped. He would start by being honest.
"Haru… you went to see Melon?"
"Yeah…"
He widened his eyes. That was a fast response, though he shouldn't be feeling surprised. After all, she knew him and his canine costumes.
"… Oh. Can I ask why?"
His heart hurt at the sight. She smiled a little, but it was a curve from her lips that didn't reach the dull expression in her eyes.
"… You did anyway." She took off her shoes and walked towards him. She looked so tired suddenly, so she extended her arms at him. "I'll tell you everything. Can we cuddle?"
He complied without saying anything. He picked her up in his arms and walked towards the warmest place of the room. He sat down with the little female in his lap and kept hugging her. It irked him smelling Melon's scent in her, he wondered if she was in danger before and he never knew it. He rubbed a little hard his muzzle against her left cheek, to fade the hybrid's scent away. She flinched a little then giggled.
"It tickles…"
Legosi didn't reply back. He waited patiently for her to start what she wanted to tell him. He felt her moving, her right cheek leaning in his bicep.
"I finally met the panda, you know? The one that helped you to rescue me?"
"Eh?" He blinked. Ok, he didn't know that. "Gouhin-san?"
"Yeah… there're some questions I had, and I thought he was the best doctor to answer them."
Did she mean medical questions? Was she feeling sick?
"Are you okay?"
"I don't know… at least, mentally, I don't think so." She said. "I'll use the money I saved to have some therapy session with panda-san."
"W-Wait, what? Really?"
"Yes. I don't know… how to deal with this, how to express it, or let out the pain… I… was able to come with terms of what happened, but… I still hadn't…"
He knew what she was talking about. He hugged her tighter to his chest.
"… about Melon… I just wanted to see him."
"Why?"
"Because he's a hybrid."
He widened his eyes.
"… I just wanted to… see him." She narrowed her eyes. "The moment I realized how much I loved you and wanted to be with you no matter what… it was thanks to him. Because, I was so excited by finding out about his species… a half-breed that came so far. I imagined… that our kid… could've been… tall, and strong… I just…" She stopped talking when she felt something warm and wet hitting her cheek. She glanced up a little and saw Legosi's teary eyes. "… Sorry."
"N-No… it's okay. I'm just… I'm glad you're sharing this with me."
Glad, he says… she thought.
"… Of course, I thought that before finding out about him being a criminal and all, but… since then, I wanted us to be a whole family. I wanted it to happen so badly, so… he was the original source of me wanting to be a mother…"
He quietly sniffled.
"… Is that why you promised him to let him eat you?"
She smiled. She had told him that a long time ago, and they had a huge fight because of that. He had reprimanded her for not taking care of herself, while she yelled at him for never understanding her feelings at all, being a hypocrite and risking his own life in exchange.
"Yep. I pictured Melon as my kid, even being bigger and older than me, I just… felt him like my son. I thought I'd do anything for my child, and… I admit what I agreed to was pretty stupid, but now you know why I did it." She shrugged.
"… I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault. I didn't want to tell you my reasons that time, and it was still my fault for letting myself get nearer to danger. It's okay."
"… So, how was Melon?"
"I didn't find him any different, honestly. I told him about our loss, and he said it was better this way, because, that way, nothing would hurt him. Not society… nor his own self."
"Oh."
Haru closed her eyes.
"You know? I wanted to… call him Juro."
Legosi flinched.
"Wh-What?" His voice broke.
Haru's heart clenched at hearing her lover's voice sounding so sad. Her own eyes filled with tears.
"Yeah… After all, I wanted that for him." She felt more drops of tears in the top of her head, ears and right cheek.
Guess that'll never happen, she wanted to add, but that would only bring more pain for Legosi… and her.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Melon was used to receiving letters from his admirers. Though he could come out if he ever wanted, he felt like it wouldn't be any fun as before.
He just kept thinking… over and over… about a certain female that made him feel so different.
He didn't want to kill her the first time he met her; he wanted to eat her, since her personality seemed tasty as well, he wondered if her flesh was like that too. But then, that changed once again.
She had made him change his feelings towards her all the time.
She praised him, for being a hybrid, for existing… for being alive and breathing.
So he admitted he was a little excited when he received a letter from her, of all people. She didn't even said goodbye when he stopped hugging her almost two years ago.
He tore the envelope and read:
To Melon:
It's been a while. How long has it been? Almost… twenty-four months, I think…? Well, I hope you're doing okay, eating well, but without killing anybody.
I don't even know why I'm writing this to you, but I felt like it, so you'll have to read it.
We're having a child.
Don't get me wrong. I can't have kids anymore, but Legosi and I don't mind adopting, there're tons of animals in this world that deserve love, and we want to give that to them. We tried to adopt a year ago, but they didn't let us because we were a 'hybrid couple', so we had to ask help for the Beastar. It took some time, but we came to an agreement: we need to marry first, wait for six months, then finally get ready the freaking papers to adopt! I'm honestly excited, like the time I was about to have Juro (I wanted to call him like that, just so you know), it feels so… similar, I don't know why. I talked with Legosi, and we wouldn't mind if we came to find another hybrid.
I'm gonna show you that hybrids can live happily.
-Haru.
The half-gazelle couldn't help but smirk.
"I'd like to see that, rabbit… we'll see about that."
Juro = Best wishes, long life.
Yeah, a little cruel.
I always thought Legosi and Haru having a kid wouldn't be that easy, society is changing, yes, but not completely, hate is alive. Besides, c'mon, Legosi is like twice Haru's size, I always thought that her being pregnant would be really dangerous. And, I always liked the idea of them adopting as well.
And I added Melon because since Paru didn't develop his and Haru's relationship further, since their interaction is really interesting, I wrote this.
This is the actual end. If I ever consider to continue this, I may add an epilogue or something.
Anyway, I hope you guys liked it!
Rossana~
Reviews?