"Love is for children. I owe him a debt."

I was surprised to see Barton's face look so deflated at the comment while watching the footage of my interrogation with Loki. Deep down I new I had been lying my ass off at that moment. I loved Clint more than he would ever know. But he could never know. There were too many reasons he could never know. Us being agents of SHIELD being one of them. Dating other agents is against the rules and for good reason. I suddenly felt really uncomfortable watching this with him. I never wanted Clint to see this.

Everyone in the room jumped when Loki's fist hit the glass. "I won't touch Barton. Not until I make him kill you. Slowly, intimately, in every way he knows you fear. And then he'll wake just long enough to see his good work and when he screams I'll split his skull! This is my bargain you mewling quim."

I looked down not wanting to see the footage. No one had known but I was actually terrified in that moment.

"Tasha..."

"Don't worry about it," I shrugged him off. "I got what I needed to know out of it."

I left the room at that point. A lot of feelings were coming forward and I needed a moment to process so the team couldn't tell anything was wrong with me.

I went to the room I was staying in in Stark tower. Sure enough there was a knock.

"Tasha?"

"Come in," I sighed. I guess I couldn't avoid him forever.

Clint walked in and sat next to me. "The others thought you were really good at your interrogation techniques. But I know you. You were really bothered by what he said weren't you?"

"Does it matter? We got you back. You didn't kill me," I shrugged.

"You were scared to lose me," it was a statement and not a question. Somehow something go my inside me snapped. The walls I'd worked so hard to build around me broke at the realization that he was right. An ugly sob escaped and my head fell into my hands in embarrassment. The great black widow was crying? I couldn't remember the last time I cried.

Clint noticed the change in me at once and put his arms around me. I hugged him tightly my arms trembling. I was terrified he'd disappear right then and there. Back into Loki's grasp.

"It's okay," he said softly in my ear ," I'm here Nat, I'm okay."

We stayed like that for a long time. Until I could stop my crying and form words again.

"Ugh" I sniffed embarrassed my partner was seeing me like this. "I'm sorry."

"You're apologizing for being human for once?" He smirked and handed me a tissue.

"Yeah" I exhaled, "I guess I am."

"Did you mean what you said?"

"About what?"

"Love is for children huh?" He brushed his thumb along my cheek and he half smiled at me. "We're you lying to Loki or to yourself?"

I stared at him. "Clint it's complicated."

"Well Uncomplicate it."

"I was playing a game with him..."

"You owe me a debt? Is that all you think of us? He stood up from the bed shaking his head at me. "That's why you spared my life when I literally tried to kill you back there? Is that why you burst into tears just now? Why you nearly lost it during the interrogation with Loki? The thought of me killing you like that?"

I flinched at the image and at his words. He caught me completely unprepared and vulnerable. I didn't know what to say. My cheeks were burning from my own feelings for him.

"You know there's more to us than just a debt," I said finally looking down.

"I'm sorry he scared you like that..." Clint said shaking his head. "I never wanted to get you hurt. But he got inside my head. I never would've told him..." he trailed off and turned away from me shaking his head.

"Clint you can't blame yourself. You didn't know. And I'm fine." I stood up and went behind him. I put my hands on his shoulder blades. I flushed immediately. What was I doing?

He turned around and we were closer than ever before. Our noses almost touching. This was how our relationship had always been. Right on the border of something more. Unable to stop myself I put my hand on the side of his face, I needed to feel his skin, feel he was actually here with me. Clint covered my hand with his own as if reading my mind.

"I'm not going anywhere," he said softly. he wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me to him again.

"Stay with me tonight?" I asked. We had slept together before on missions all the time so this was nothing new for him.

"Sure," he squeezed me reassuringly and let me go, "just let me grab my stuff."

He left the room and I followed him out to the living area of Stark tower.

"You two done making out?" Stark smirked at us.

I punched him in the arm. "We're not dating Stark."

"Not yet. I got 10 bucks you'll end up together though. Try not to disappoint, "he winked and I went for another punch. This time he dodged.

Clint returned from his room with his bag and we went back into my room and locked the door behind us.

We both crawled into bed together after changing into night clothes. Without any words he pulled me to him from behind and was spooning me. I snuggled closer to him. We may not talk about our feelings, but we both knew how the other felt on the inside. He nuzzled into my neck and held me tight. I snuggled closer to him.

I turned around in his arms and we both stared at one another. My cheeks were flushed and Clints eyes darkened. His thumb stroked my cheek, "what is it?"

I couldn't bring myself to say the words. I just slowly, shyly brought my lips to his. He kissed me back ever so gently and his hand went to the back of my neck. It felt so amazing. I'd wanted to kiss him for a long time. I retreated once the consequences for what we'd done entered my mind. What was I doing? I'd kept him at a distance for a reason.

"We can't do this."

"We already have," he stroked my cheek.

"We can't be having feelings for each other."

"A little late for that," he chuckled, "Nat regardless we're human first, agents second. You can't control who you end up having feelings for."

"And you have feelings for me?" I asked.

"I'd die for you" he said without hesitation.

I blushed, "same here"

He took my hand and placed it on his heart. "I mean it. It belongs to you. Im in love with you Natasha Romanoff. I'm yours, always have been, always will be. I can't promise I won't die, but I can promise I'll always try to find my way back to you. Always."

Tears flooded my eyes, "Clint...I..."

"You don't have to say it back if it scares you. I know you. I know how you feel for me. It's okay." I sighed and pressed my lips to his again.