I Think That He Likes Me

I can't believe I'm actually meeting James here, Lily thought as she walked through the cool, dusky, evening air towards the Three Broomsticks. It's just a study date, she reminded herself as she reached the door to the small wizarding pub in Hogsmeade to pull it open. As Lily entered she caught sight of James right away. He had snagged a table in the crowded pub off to one side and was slinging his bookbag off his shoulder as she approached.

"Ahh, welcome, Evans!" James exclaimed as he saw her, dipping his head in what she assumed was a gesture intended to be charming but came off looking ridiculous.

"And hello to you too," Lily quipped as she moved to sit down. As she was pulling out her chair James swooped behind her in an attempt to pull out her chair for her, but only succeeded in causing her to lose her balance since she had already begun to sit.

"Come on, Evans, I'm trying to be romantic here," James said with a laugh, pushing her chair in behind her and then moving to sit on the other side of the table.

"Romantic? Well maybe you should find a different pastime," Lily chuckled, pulling her bookbag off her shoulder and getting her books, parchment and quills laid out across the table for them.

"Oh, Lily. When will you see that romance is my pastime?" James gave a dramatic sigh, placing a hand over his heart in mock pain. "My pastime, my present - time, and my future - time." Lily simply rolled her eyes, pulling out her Pygmy Puff Potter from her bag. The lilac colored ball of fuzz happily scampered up her arm to nestle itself on her shoulder in the crook of her neck.

"He still follows me everywhere," Lily sighed, pulling Potter off her shoulder and setting him down on the mahogany table to play. "Just like his namesake."

"Well then he is a man of clear smarts and intelligence," James grinned as the Pygmy Puff sat on the table giving him the side eye. James opened his arms to let the small creature crawl into his lap. Lily couldn't help but laugh, James looked ridiculous. The Pygmy Puff slowly crawled over to James' hand, lifted up one of his fingers, then bit it. "Hey!" James yelled, pulling his finger away as the Puff scampered back to Lily and up her arm to her shoulder.

Lily sighed, watching James with an amused expression. "I see what you mean about the smart and intelligent bit now," she said, grinning as Potter pulled itself up onto her head to nestle into her hair.

"Oh bugger off, Evans," James retorted with a sigh of his own before pulling his bookbag up onto the table. Random pieces of parchment, quills, and dog eared books spilled out onto the table. Lily glanced at the mess, pushing one of his books back onto his side of the table.

"When I told you to come prepared to study, I did not mean 'throw every book you own into a bag and call it good," Lily rolled her eyes as she watched James hastily trying to organize his books to match her own. "Come on, you managed to survive your O.W.L.S last year. Now you need to keep up the good work to pass your N.E.W.T.S."

"Don't worry, Evans, the N.E.W.T.S aren't until next year," James said, finally pushing his books into a stack and then moving on to collect his quills and bits of parchment. Finding a Sugar Quill, he popped it in his mouth for a few seconds before continuing to talk. "I promise I'll be prepared."

Lily raised one eyebrow sceptically, shaking her head. "Well I suppose if you say so then there's no reason for me to be here…" She let her sentence trail off, still watching James with her eyebrow raised.

"Wait! No, no, you're right, I need help," James sighed, running his hands through his messy black hair. "That's why I asked you to come here… to help with studying…"

Lily smiled, although a small ember seemed to be burning in her stomach at those words. "Yes. And that's why I accepted," she said with a curt nod, pulling the top book off her stack. "To help you study."

James glanced at the title of the book Lily had pulled down. "Ugh… do we have to start with Astronomy?"

"Well, James, seeing as I think that would be your reaction no matter which subject we started with, I'm going to say yes." Lily opened her book, pulling out a quill and a fresh new piece of parchment from her bag.

"No… that's not true," James said, scratching his head with his quill. "I like Defense Against the Dark Arts… you know, with You Know Who around, that stuff is even more important."

Lily paused in writing the date at the top of her parchment, glancing up to see if James was joking. She didn't think she'd heard him right. "Well… yes. That's very true…" she began hesitantly, still unsure of if he'd said what she thought.

"You know, I want to do my part to make sure someone puts a stop to his evil reign. People don't deserve to live in fear all the time." James then chuckled uneasily. "I mean, you know… just something I've been thinking about."

Lily was again struck by James' words. "Well that's a very mature way of thinking about things, James." She said, still eyeing him suspiciously.

James then chuckled, a bright smile appearing back on his face. "Well, you know me, Evans. I'm always the one to have those mature thoughts," he laughed, then was distracted as the barmaid Madam Rosemertta came over to ask if they wanted to order anything. "I'll have a Butterbeer," James said with a grin and a wink towards the tavern owner who didn't bat an eye at James' flirtation attempt.

"I'll have one as well," Lily smiled, then turned to James as Rosemertta walked away. "Oh, so you and Rosemertta are the 'new hot thing' nowadays?" She joked, pulling Potter off her head and letting him scamper down her arm to play on the table.

"Absolutely," James grinned, glancing back at the barmaid who was preparing their drinks. "Didn't you see the way she looked at me? She was so clearly in love she was at a loss for words."

"Mmhm," Lily smirked, watching as Madam Rosemertta walked back over with their drinks in hand.

"Thank you, my darling," James said, earning a stern glare from the tavern owner before she left to go assist other customers.

"Well she seemed to have graduated from girlfriend to mum in just one glare," Lily laughed, watching as Potter scampered over her things to James' side and began chewing on one of his pieces of parchment.

"I know, it sent shivers up my spine," James agreed, watching the Pygmy Puff with a mixture of amusement and fear. The pair then fell silent, avoiding one another's gaze as they listened to the chatter of the pub around them. However it was only a few minutes until James spoke up again. "You know, I don't really like Madam Rosemertta." He began, trailing a hand through his hair as he spoke.

"Oh is that so?" Lily began, pretending to be surprised by James' seemingly obvious comment. James shifted awkwardly in his seat, like he couldn't sit still.

"Yeah, actually. I mean, she's nice, of course, and bloody gorgeous…"

"I can really tell you dont like her at all."

"Bugger off. No, there's a lot more than looks into stuff like this. You want to love someone who never fails to make you nervous when she gives you that look. You want to be in awe about everything about her. You make up any excuse to talk to her…" James suddenly trailed off, an embarrassed flush coating his cheeks.

Lily watched him, a swell of feelings rising up inside her that she tried her hardest to quell before they rose to her face and made her cheeks just as red.

"You know, I'm just gonna head to the bathroom for a minute," James muttered before promptly standing up and excusing himself. Lily was pretty sure she caught him muttering a few choice words to himself as he left.

Am I crazy? Lily wondered, turning her head to watch as James disappeared into the mens room, face still red and a hand running along the back of his neck in a gesture she'd become so accustomed to seeing in him. He was totally strange. Things like that never happened with James. In the six years she'd known him he'd never once broken his cheery, joking facade around her, and yet he had done it twice in their conversation that day. Maybe I missed something, she thought, but quickly ruled out that thought. She had known James Potter since they'd arrived at Hogwarts, and something was definitely up with him tonight. He couldn't have suddenly changed overnight, could he?

Lily was pulled from her thoughts as her Pygmy Puff Potter clambered back onto her side of the table, laying down on top of her Astronomy textbook with a scrap of paper stuck out of his mouth. Lily watched the small creature with amusement, placing her head in her hand. "Potter, you know, well, Potter better than I do. Is there something strange about him tonight? I mean, we were just hanging out, right? Just two good friends on a Saturday night…"

This time it was Lily's turn to trail off as James exited the bathroom and sat down across from her again. Lily hastily put Potter on her shoulder to avoid it seeming like she was just having a conversation with it. One Potter was more than enough.

"Well, Lil, did you miss me?" James asked as he sat down, flashing the charming grin that she had come to know all so well. He seemed like he was back to his normal self, but she couldn't help but think that there was still something strange about him.

"Yes, James, although I think this one is a little disappointed you're back," she replied, pulling Potter off her shoulder just as he was finished munching away on the last scrap of parchment he had taken from one of James' books.

"Ahh that's alright, he can have it," James laughed, opening up his book to the page Potter had eaten from. "When your friends are literal animals, you get used to missing book pages."

"Yes, your friends certainly are interesting. Not sure if I would go as far as to say their animals, however. You, on the other hand…" Lily grinned back at James, allowing Potter to scramble out of her hands and back over to James' textbooks.

"Ahh, you just don't know them like I do. Trust me; animals, each and every one of them. Myself included," he added with a good natured laugh. Then he turned his attention to where Potter the Pygmy Puff was struggling to get James' Astronomy textbook back open for another bite. "Here little buddy, have one from Divination," James pulled that book out of the stack and ripped a page out, handing it down to the liliac critter who curled up on James' knee to eat. "I don't need that book anymore, and thank god. Divination is a load of crap."

Lily nodded. "Are you only saying that because you got an D on your O.W.L in that class?" She asked with a small laugh.

"See? This is why I need you around," James laughed with her. "A complete ray of sunshine you are, Evans."

"Charmed, I'm sure." Lily retorted, then the two fell, yet again, into silence. This one, however, seemed to be thick with tension. With nothing else to do Lily reached out and grabbed her mug of Butterbeer, taking several deep sips from it while averting her eyes from the boy who sat across from her.

James, however, didn't seem to pick up on the fact that Lily was too nervous to look at him, as she caught him staring right at her. After a few more gulps of Butterbeer she set her mug down, finally daring to glance back up at James. She was startled to see the intensity in which he was staring back.

Then, with a smirk, James began to lean across the table towards her. Lily paled, completely rooted to her seat. The ember that had ignited in her stomach seemed to grow larger, as if it were a firework ready to explode. James, his stupid, cocky smirk still on his lips gently reached his hand out, brushing her cheek so delicately it was as if she was made of porcellian. His hazel eyes seemed to bore into her… she'd never noticed the small flecks of green in his eyes before. She'd never seen his smirk so close. She'd never seen any of James this close.

All of a sudden James pulled his hand back, sitting back down in his seat, his smirk disappeared. He ran his hand through his hair and opened his mouth, but it appeared no words could come out.

Lily touched her cheek. What was that? She wondered. Why didn't I move? Why couldn't I breathe… oh god… I think that he likes me. Lily's heart quicked at that revelation. Sure, she knew James could be a massive flirt, but there was something about that look, that touch, that told her things were different then they used to be.

James still appeared to be unable to speak. His mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water as another deep red blush coated his cheeks. "I…" he finally managed to get out, helping Potter off his knee and back onto the table. "You just had some…. just a little piece…. there was some of the foam… stuck… cheek."

Lily couldn't help but chuckle at his reaction and stuttered words. However when she herself tried to speak, she had about as much success as James. Her mouth opened but now she couldn't stop looking at his eyes. The way he had stared at her sent shivers up and down her spine. She felt like she couldn't breathe around him anymore. He likes me…

"... I was just… you know, trying to help… just cause… Well, I didn't think you'd noticed…" James was still murmuring on as Lily refocused. She quickly nodded her head.

"Yes! No, yeah, I understand," she said, quickly removing her fingers from the spot on her cheek where James' hands had been not moments before. They both relapsed into silence and this time it was James' turn to down his Butterbeer and avoid her eyes. After he set down his mug and glanced back up at her, Lily knew she couldn't just keep sitting here like this. "Do you want to go for a walk or something?"

James gestured to their books that were still spread out across the table. "What about all this?" He asked her, tearing out another small page from his Divination book to give to Potter who sat in the middle of their table.

"It's not like we were doing much studying to begin with," Lily said with a laugh, already beginning to put her books back into her bag. "Come on, let's walk back to the castle together. It's getting late, anyway."

James nodded, hastily shoving his stuff back into his bag despite the organized piles he'd placed it in earlier. Lily's Pygmy Puff got swept into James' bag in his haste. However the lilac critter didn't seem to mind as he curled up in the dark and began sucking on James' Sugar Quill.

Lily put her stuff away as well, then they headed back out onto the streets of Hogsmeade. It was late in the evening now and the pathway back was dimly lit with street lamps. The first chills of winter were in the air, but it wasn't cold enough to make anyone run for their winter jackets just yet.

She opened her mouth to say something but her voice trailed off before she could even begin, so she shut it again. Lily didn't know why but for some reason, walking with James, she felt more embarrassed than she ever had before. She cast a quick glance over at him and he met her gaze with a small smirk, then quickly looked away. Lily was gratified to see that he couldn't think of anything to say either. So maybe he likes me?

They continued walking in silence for a bit. Whenever Lily glanced over at James he had his head hung down to look at his feet, but would always glance up and give her a quick smile before his cheeks would grow red and he'd look down again. Lily attributed that behavior to the cold whenever she felt her cheeks grow crimson too. He had been so awkward around her since their… What do you even call something like that? But in a way Lily found it rather sweet and endearing. She had never met someone who was able to render James Potter speechless, even their toughest teachers. I'm thinking he likes me.

However Lily couldn't help but notice a strange feeling of her own taking root in her stomach. To be fair, she wasn't usually at a loss for words either. But as hard as she tried she couldn't think of one thing to say to him. After their many years of fights, quips, insults, and rare moments of friendship, Lily couldn't find the appropriate words to say to him tonight. She caught herself thinking back to previous times they'd shared together and was surprised to realize that she looked back on all of it with a fond memory.

Oh god… how long had James Potter really liked her? Now that she was looking back on things she could see how in some moments his eyes would light up when he said her name, she caught him staring at her the way he had tonight while she had been studying, all those moments of running to catch up to her in the castle halls… What if tonight was his breaking point? What if this all was some long denied desire?

Lily's head started to get foggy thinking about all that. It was too much to focus on for one night. However her head and her heart were on clear and separate agendas. While she could tell her head no, her heart would hear none of it. That small ember that had begun to burn deep in her stomach had caught her heart on fire and she could do nothing to quench it.

All of a sudden, to her surprise, James reached out and took her hand. "Wouldn't want you getting lost out here," he said, his playful smirk back on his lips and a happy gleam in his eyes.

Lily decided not to point out the fact that they were following a path, instead relieved to have something to talk about. "Oh? And what makes you think you know this place so much better than me, Potter?" She asked, bumping his shoulder with her own.

"Please, Evans, do you know how often I've snuck out? This is my sixth year here. Lets average the fact that I sneak out… once a week. Which I don't, of course…"

"Of course."

"Right. So once a week for six years… you can do the math for that." James laughed, giving Lily's hand a small squeeze.

"Nope I'm alright," she laughed with him, shaking her head. "I have no idea how you manage to pass classes with all that sneaking about going on."

"Oh you know… maybe I've got a great friend who is willing to take me out studying and who doesnt leave me in the mud," James glanced over at Lily as he spoke, brushing a stray piece of hair from her face. "You know I mean Sirius, right?"

"Bloody hell…" Lily sighed, although she couldn't help the laugh that bubbled up from her stomach. "That bloke couldn't do anything without someone to keep him on track."

"Right you are, Evans," James grinned back at her. "He's usually dogging someone." James then laughed as if he had made a very clever joke while Lily watched with amusement. "I'm serious though, he's lucky to have you guys around." Lily realized her mistake as soon as she said it. James began laughing once more.

"You're not serious, he is!" They said in unison. James glanced over at Lily again with a bemused expression. "Man Evans, sometimes I'm scared by how well you know me."

"Face it, Potter, you're awfully predictable." Lily retorted, and they two fell silent once more.

Lily felt her chest swell again and glanced over at James. He had the remnants of a smile still on his lips as they continued to walk. Lily wondered what was on his mind tonight. Did he see something new in her? What had caused him to reach out like he did? She couldn't help but blush when she thought back to that moment. It had made her feel lighter… brighter then she could remember feeling. She wondered if James had felt it too.

She glanced over at James again and caught him staring. They both quickly looked away, although their hands remained joined. Lily saw Hogwarts castle in the distance and was almost dismayed to see it. She wondered why he had been staring again. Was he looking for things in her that he'd missed before? Lily knew that after today she saw James in a whole different light. She knew she could never look at his eyes or his smirk the same way. Lily wondered if James was looking for things he now couldn't ignore like she was. Some small part of her really hoped he was. Some part of her hoped that he was feeling this feeling that she was feeling now. Whatever it was.

They entered through the main doors of Hogwarts and James let go of her hand to get the door for her. There were still some students milling around the Great Hall as they walked past, up the stairs to the Gryffindor dormitory. They both stayed quiet as they entered the empty common room, and James walked Lily over to the set of stairs that would lead her up to her room.

"Well…" Lily began.

"Well…" James finished.

Lily finally looked up to meet his eyes and was yet again met with that piercing stare she could now so easily recognize. He looks like he likes me…

"Thanks for walking with me, James." Lily said, shouldering her bookbag.

"Thanks for the attempted study date, Evans." James added, a small smirk accompanying his words. For as confident as he looked and sounded, his eyes never dared to meet his.

Lily stared hard at James, the feelings of embarrassment leaving her, being replaced with just an overwhelming sense of… happy. Look at him standing here, pretending like things are normal. He can't admit that he likes me. Lily almost laughed. The absurdity of James Potter not being able to say something was new to her, and surly new to him.

"Well…" James gave Lily a small nod, then turned and began to walk away. Why won't he stay? Lily wondered, her heart beating faster the further away he got. Why do I care? Why do I want him to come back? To touch me again. Smirk at me, hold me, anything.

All of a sudden Lily saw her Pygmy Puff pop out of James' bag. "Potter!" She yelled, her heart hammering.

James turned around and noticed the Pygmy Puff in his bag. "Umm… were you talking to me or…"

Before James could do or say anything else Lily marched across the common room, planting a firm kiss on his lips. James reciprocated, letting his bag drop to the floor and wrapping his arms around her waist. It was only an indigent squeak from the Pygmy Puff, who had landed with a book on his head, that finally broke them apart.

"I… I'm sorry… I don't know where that came from…" Lily said, her heart still hammering.

"Lily…" James muttered, reaching out and cupping her cheek with his hand. This time he initiated their kiss, and his was slow yet full of passion. They finally broke apart again, both with flushed faces.

"Well… that was long overdue." James said, shaking his head in disbelief.

"I… yeah, it was." Lily agreed, bending down and picking up Potter from where he had been discarded to the ground.

"Now I know the little guy takes after me," James began, pointing an accusatory finger down at the small lilac creature. "But if you go kissing him you may wake up to see him being hexed."

Now I know that he likes me…. I think I like him too.