"You're exhausting."

"You're so needy."

"Why can't you just suck it up like everyone else?"

"Maybe the problem is you."

The sentences bounced around inside Buck's head as he tossed and turned that night. They were right. He was too much. Too much effort, too much work, too much energy. He wasn't worth it. When it really came down to it, the reason why he felt so alone was because he was nothing but a burden to his friends, to his family.

Buck didn't like being alone. That was the motive behind a lot of his decisions. Buck hated being alone. Hence, the lawsuit to get back to the 118. The reason he was so willing to let Albert stay with him. Why he would drop anything for Eddie and Christopher.

Looking back at how things have been going these past few years, Buck realized that he really was the problem. At least, he thought he was.

"Maybe the problem is you." The words haunted him. They stuck to his brain like chewing gum sticks to the bottom of shoes.

So Buck started to pull away from his friends. Convinced that he was doing it to make their lives better off. He was a problem, and the only solution in his mind was to subtract himself from the equation. It started off with him not going drinking with the team. He babysat Chris less and less. He no longer met up with Maddie. Then he stopped texting anyone back. Started bringing his own lunch and dinner to work and eating in the safety and solidarity of either the bunks or the locker room. Whenever someone asked why he was withdrawing, he gave a non committal shrug, and redirected the conversation to a safer topic.

He was doing the right thing. Buck was sure of it.

"Hey guys?" Hen hesitantly started, gathering the attention of the other members (sans Buck) of the 118. "Do any of you know what's going on with Buck?"

She was met with looks of unease and hasty shakes of their heads.

"Our Buckaroo just isn't acting like himself." Chim muses, shifting in his seat and not meeting the other firefighter's eyes. "Albert says he's been unusually quiet since their weird little double date disaster thing."

"Do you think something happened that they're not telling us?" Bobby inquired, setting his fork down onto the table and leaning heavily on his elbows.

Chim squirms slightly under the intense look that Bobby was giving him, before giving a weary "I don't know" in response.

"Look, I don't know what could've happened that was so disastrous, but he's not even spending time with Christopher. The poor kid is upset as can be now that 'his Buck' isn't talking with him as much anymore. Chris is worried he did something, or that this is gonna turn into what happened before."

Eddie's words hung heavily in the air, their implication and reminder of the lawsuit filling the room with tension so thick it couldn't be cut with a knife.

"Okay so let's just brainstorm what we know." Bobby said, ever the leader.

"Well we know he was on that double date with Albert, his ex date from hell, and the reporter who wanted to destroy us." Chim started off.

"Okay… all judgements aside, that's true." Cap agreed, before adding on, "He's not eating with us, and he's declined any offers to come to my place for dinner with Athena or the kids."

"He's avoiding me and Chris." Eddie spits out, anger lacing his words. He deflates a little under Bobby's pointed look, but the anger still simmered beneath the surface. Eddie knew that he should talk to Frank about this, seeing as Buck's behavior was impacting his own actions and feelings.

"He's not as open or talkative as he used to be." Hen added.

"Maddie said that he's not really talking to her much either." Chim said. "He won't meet up with her or reply to her texts."

"Now that you mention it, he doesn't reply to my texts either." Hen frowned.

Cap and Eddie chime in their agreements of ignored texts and unanswered phone calls.

"Okay Chim, tonight why don't you give your brother a call, see what details he can give you. Let's not panic over some antisocial behavior. I'm sure Buck will be okay, we just need to get to the bottom of the problem, and support him however he needs. We will not fail him." Bobby told them, with conviction. The "again" went unsaid, but not unfelt.

The rest of the team nodded uneasily, before digging into their dinners while they could. Buck never made an appearance, instead choosing to eat a sandwich in the bunk room, away from his team. He didn't know just how much his presence was missed, and how worried his team— his family— was. How could he? He thought he was doing the right thing.