I'm Gay Panicking But It's Fine

by Mka1098

Nico is broody and dark but Will is bright and friendly. Nico then gay panics, as you do... Will rolls his eyes and scoffs. "I'm gay- course I have some style. What's your excuse?" He says snarkily. Nico can only blink back at him. Gay, gay, he's gay. Oh of course he's gay! His inner monologue is stupid. I'm gay, he's gay. Oh my gods, we're both gay A Solangelo Oneshot

Might be a bit of OOC it's my first Solangelo piece; they are just too cute for me not to try and write them. Also, I'm straight (feel free to make fun of me like my friends, I take all the hits) so my attempt at gay panic is just not great. I just tried to think of my friend when they gay panic. Haha, hope you guys like this piece, and the podfic/audio versionis in my profile box

Nico is a generally petulant,cold-faced and stoic person. He smiles only during the darkest and latest of nights and barely grunts a word at people. His expressions are perceived as less than friendly and perhaps the only people who weren't afraid of him and his ghost powers could be counted on one hand. (Percy, Annabeth, Jason, Hazel and Renya). So it was a total shock to him when the golden-haired Will Solace bounced next to him right as he was leaving his cabin at 2 PM in the afternoon.

"Uh… hi?" He says in the quietest voice. Will smiles brightly at him.

"Hi Nico." The blonde says. Nico frowns. He feels as if he's being smirked at. And oh, it is not a welcomed feeling, not for him. Enough people believe they can mess with him and those said people were sent right to Will's own wing.

"What do you want?" He asks with a bit of bite in his tone. Will shrugs.

"Just wanted to say hi." He says evenly. Nico scowls at him.

"That's it?" His tone is harsh. "You just wanna pop over here and say hi? For no reason?" Nico says snarily. Surprisingly, Will doesn't run and scream in terror; he doesn't start to shake either. Instead, his smile seems to grow infinitesimally bigger and he shoves his hands into his pockets.

"Yep." He pops the P of the word before turning sharply left and away from Nico. The blonde doesn't even look back at the confounded boy he had left standing. Instead, he smiles at some of the other campers and heads into cabin 6.

Nico stares back at him dumbly, even as he disappears into the cabin. "What the Hades?" He mutters quizzingly to himself. Nico crosses his arms tightly on his chest. There are some other campers, gossips for sure, who are staring at him. They are murmuring hush whispers while clearly pointing at him. He sends them a murderous glare; the point gets across and they scramble away quickly. Nico sighs. Sure being dark and broody is helpful when one wants to be alone but there are times when he doesn't want to be alone. Alas, how on this earth is one supposed to make friends when they have the appearance of a walking skeleton. Nico keeps walking towards the mess hall. He needs food; he needs it now. His stomach shouts at him to hurry up. Hm, if only Jason was here then maybe he'd believe him that yes, the Nico Di Angelo does still run on sustenance- well, something other than happy meals.

Few campers are still in the mess hall when he arrives. They stick to their own tables, their only sibling. Nico has no sibling, not any that are here at least. Sitting down, he summons plain salted noodles, slightly butter and light garlic; diet coke rather than water. He sighs as he smashes a forkful into his mouth. Pasta's great and all but he eats it because they are simple carbs. Plain pasta isn't overpowering, it isn't too earthy or meaty or lettuce. It's just enough to keep him up right. Nico sighs again as he finishes half the bowl, quickly getting sick of the dish. As he scrapes the rest of the pasta into the fire, he wishes he had a friend next to him.

"Welcome back." Nico groans as the harsh light attacks his eyes. He attempts to get up but is shoved, gently at least, back down. "You just woke up; it'd be awful if you fainted again." The voice chuckled. Nico's eyes register just enough to see curly blonde hair next to him. The figure is wearing a white coat and holding a clipboard; it's Will.

"What happened?" Nico says in a slight snarl.

"Shadow travel." Will responds dryly. "Did you know you have a limit on distance and time?" He asks with an innocent voice but his eyes are letting on more than he's saying. "It seems to me that your body uses a lot of energy to travel around that way and it lowers our blood sugar significantly."

Nico scowls at him and blinks at the feeling of a hollow ache within him. "Yes, I did know that." He says. Will makes a half-smile, half-smirk.

"Great, then I'm going to need you to manage your shadow traveling a bit better." Will says. "I will come up with exact rules soon but know it's going to be more limited now."

Nico feels fury well up inside of him. "Not over my dead body." He growls. Wills chuckles at his threat, annoying Nico even more.

"One-" Will puts a finger up. "-if you were a dead body then I did my job wrong. Two, as if you'd go so quickly. And three, doctor's orders." He says firmly, leaning in. Nico crosses his arms indignantly.

"And what if I don't listen?" He snaps.

"You will." Will sounds so sure of himself. Nico's eyes darken.

"And how do you know that?"

Will leans in; he leans in very much. Nico gulps subconsciously and for a moment is shell-shocked by the smug look on Will's face. His eyes are full of bright lights and mirth. His mouth is pink and completely sure. Nico never really talked to Will before… well yesterday when he had randomly said hi when Nico woke up. He had always known the blonde, how could one not and vise versa. He knew Will was smart and capable and a wicked good doctor; Nico just didn't know how commanding and snarky he was either.

"Oh, I have a feeling." With that, Will leans back and rips off a piece of paper and hands it to Nico. The boy stares at it; it has times and measurements. "Your new rules." Will says easily. "Doctor's orders." He leaves with a flourish of his coat and Nico is left still on the bed with shouted orders to rest.

Nico is surprised- pleasantly surprised. Everyone at camp is afraid of him and his 'scary' powers. But Will is not. It's a nice change. A hint of a smile appears on Nico's face. He actually listens for once (because he is not Percy Jackson)

"What is that?" Nico stares at the cards in Will's hands. He shrugs. Nico scowls at him deeper. "What is that?" He repeats.

"Mythomagic cards." Will smiles bright; Nico wants to put on sunglasses. "I was playing with a couple of my patients when I remembered that you used to be a huge fan of the game. That was how you identified Dionysus right?" Will teases. Nico feels his face warm up, something that never happened before. Indignantly, he turns away with a huff. "Huh? Don't like it? Mm… could've swore you still liked the game; oh well, see you later then."

Will only takes about 3 steps before Nico caves. "Wait." Nico calls out quiet but Will hears and spins around as if he had shouted at the top of his lungs. "I- I still like the game, okay?" Nico says, trying to act hardened but it wasn't working as well as he was hoping it would.

"Perfect!" WIll says with a grin on his face. "Come join me." He puts a hand out between them. Nico stares at it. What? Noticing that Nico didn't move a muscle, Will quirks an eyebrow up. "Huh? Too much for you to handle?" He teases. "Sorry, just say it." He brings his hands back to the pocket of his sweatshirt but smiles welcomingly for Nico to follow him. Nico frowns before giving in and following the blonde. He still catches the smirk residing on Will's face.

"You don't need to look so smug; I still like the game." Nico growls. Will tilts his head to the side.

"I hoped so."

They enter the hospital healing wing and there is a group of kids in clean white robes that seem to light up when their eyes catch on Will. They are young- ages 9...10...11...12 perhaps. " !" They chorus before even noticing that Nico stands next to him. Will smiles brightly; he looks almost like an angel of medicine with the sun shining through the window. "You're back!" The kids continue. Will laughs and leaps onto one of the empty gurnays. Nico walks and stands awkwardly next to it. The kids don't spare him much of a glance- he wants to melt into the shadows to escape but finds that the wing is so lit up with light the nearest shadow could barely cover his entire hand.

"I am!" Will says, eyes Twinkling. "And… I brought a friend." He presents his arms out like a magician showing his newest trick. The kids stare at Nico. Nico stares back awkwardly. Uh… what is he supposed to do now? He waves; a tight forced smile is on his face. The kids look at him intently and then back at Will. They smile, a move Nico did not expect, and nearly giggle out. What on… what? "Guys…" Will says with a head shake. Nico looks at him with a head shake. Is there a blush on his face or has Nico forgotten breakfast again? "-don't laugh. This is Nico."

A kid falls over, chortling. "Oh… we know." He says mischievously. Will sends him a hard look. The kid turns back to Nico and thrusts a stack of cards in his hands. "You've ever played?" Nico looks at the cards… amacter set.

"Yeah." Nico grunts. The kids here are all too young to know his past- they don't know what these cards mean to him. "Course I do… I've got seven of these." He continues. The kid's eyes widen like saucers; the other kids gasp dramatically.

"No way!" The kid lights up like a firework. "That's so many! I only have that one of everything. But I do have two Apollos!" The kid explains.

"No, you don't! You don't have Athena."

"It didn't come with!"

"That's no excuse."

Nico is confused and stares at the bickering kids, unsure of what to do next. WIll seems to have noticed his discomfort because he leans over slightly. "Tanner, he's one of Ares's kids. Lara's mom is Athena. They like to fight a lot but they're friends." He explains. Nico quietly nods, observing as Lara and Tanner begin to shove each other's shoulders. Will allows them to fight for a minute longer before cleaning his throat and sternig glaring at them. Lara sheepsily takes her hands off of Tanner's shoulders. "That's enough; do you want to start the game now or what?" Will smiles, holding his cards up. Nico copies the motions, inspecting each player carefully.

"I'm ready to win." Lara brags. Without meaning to, a rare smirk raises to Nico's face; it feels equally forgien and nice.

"That's funny because I'm sure I'm going to win." Tanner shouts at her. Lara stickers her tongue out at her.

Nico lowly huckles, hiding it behind hsi stack of cards. Will seems to be the only one who notices it. The blonde looks at him with a smile and eyebrow quirk. Nico scowls. "What?" He snaps.

Will shakes his head. "Nothing. Just nice to see that look on your face."

Nico stares at him, unsure of what he means. So instead of worrying about it , he resorts to slamming these kids at Mythomagic. No one knows it better than he does.

"Woah! How'd you do that?" Lara shouts at him when Nico unsurprisingly wins. He shrugs.

"Easy move." He says lazily. Lara glares at him but it's nothing like her older sister's stare so he's not fazed at all. "You'll learn it in time." He all but teases. She snarls at him; he slightly grins back.

Will laughs and forces Lara to put her cards back in the pile. "He's a big fan of the game, don't take it personally." He tells her. Tanner looks back at Nico with wide and impressed eyes.

"Really?"

Nico feels awkward- never once has anyone looked at him in awe. Why was this kid doing these? What did he want from him? "Uh- yeah. I have most of the extra packs. You know, it's fun." HE babbles out, wanting to melt into the ground. Tanner leaps up on his gurney.

"That's awesome!" He cries. "Can you play with us more?" He asks. His eyes go big and wide and Nico finds it in himself to not shut him down with a harsh no. tanner looks excited, Lara looks interested and Will looks smug. Nico snarls at him.

"What's got you all happy and sunshiny?" He asks. Will just keeps smiling, still looking like a medicine angel or whatever.

"It's nice seeing you have fun. I'm so used to you groaning in pain on one of these." He motions to the gurneys. "You should play with us more. Lots of the kids love the game." Will asks. His smile seems welcoming. Nico is still unsure if he should or shouldn't agree. "Besides… how else will those extra card packs come into use?" WIll teases.

Nico decides that he'll agree to play with him more often. "Touche." He mumbles and Will knows he's won. The kids are a bit loud for his taste but the game is fun. It's nice playing with people who love Mythomagic almost as much as he does. And Will… he's nice… a little too nice but not awful. He's a nice friend. Maybe…

When Nico leaves the hospital wing to retreat into his own cabin to nap the day away, he leaves with a new ten-year-old fan, a planned gaming session next Tuesday and Will's touch lingering on his shoulder. He buries himself in his four blankets and knocks out for twenty hours.

He admits… it's weird having a friend- at the same time, it's so nice. Will is friendly and bright; slightly annoying but sometimes it makes him smile in a way that makes him also want to bury himself into the ground. How could a person look so sweet yet not disgusting? It didn't make sense! The last time a person had smiled like an angel and been cute without being awful was Percy and Nico didn't need another round of that.

"Hey… Will, can you- do you think you can help me with something?" Nico says, very nervously. The feeling's very odd for him; he's more brooding than awkward on a day to day basis. The young patients behind Will seem to giggle slightly. The blonde smiles back at him, looking as golden as his father in a tiny way.

"Yeah… with what?" He asks, leaning forward on the gurney.

Nico opens his mouth to respond but is distracted for a second. Who on Gaea's earth gave Will arms like that? They're strong, that's clear but not overly muscled and big. Lean but firm and oh dear Zeus, why can't Nico stop gaping at them. Why are they so gorgeous? Why are they so distracting? Oh gods. Nico swallows and forces his eyes away from the view. If Will had noticed him staring, he certainly doesn't show it. His smile is as serene and pleasant as ever. Nico swears his face isn't bright red but it may be.

"Um- Per- my dad wants me over for dinner and… I don't know, I wanna make a good impression on my step-mom; she's not trying to smite me so I think it'd be nice." Nico admits, fighting the urge to shadow travel away. God, he's so awkward. Nico blames Will's newfound arms for the feeling- technically though, Nico had been awkward since he called out Will's name while walking slowly into the room.

"Yeah, of course!" Will smiles brightly.

"Really?"

"Definitely. My shift's wrapping up anyway so I have the time."

"Oh." A smile sneaks it's way up on Nico's face. He hates it. "Thanks." He says meekly. Will shrugs, calling that it's no problem and that he'll meet him at his cabin in about ten minutes.

When Nico closes his cabin door, he questions his own sanity.

He further questions it as Will explains which fork is which and which spoon goes where. Oh if he thought his arms were a distraction before then it was the entire center star of a solar system now. With his doctor coat, most of Will's arm had been covered and only the forearm showed and a sliver of upper arms- now his entire arm is on display and Nico's mouth is basically probably drooling. It's all lean muscle and beautifully tanned skin.

"Nico? Hello~?" Will waves his hand in front of his face and Nico jumps about a foot in the air. Will snickers; Nico does not.

"I hear ya, salad, soup, all that." Nico growls in an attempt to hide his gaping. Will chuckles and folds his arms over his chest. Huh, wow… biceps- very nice. Nico feels dizzy.

"Great, then I will be on my way then." Will says easily, walking towards the door.

Everything in Nico's mind and body screams at him to not let the boy leave. He steps up and puts a hand on Will's shoulder and wow, it's an equally terrible and glorious idea. He jerks back like he's been burned; Will takes notice and looks at him like he's gone insane. He probably is a third way there.

"I- I need help picking something nice to wear." Nico blabbers out, a very unlikely thing for him to do. "Pure emo black probably isn't the best impression." He continues like an idiot. He secretly asks for the earth to open up and swallow him whole. Then again, he could probably have that arranged if he really wanted it to happen. "I don't know what to do, you know…?" Cue awkward grin. Cue facepalm. Cue Will's weirdly cute head tilt.

"Well your father is Hades so I don't think she'd really mind this-" Will looks him up and down; Nico's face becomes red. "-ensemble. But I do get where you're coming from. I'm thinking… nice but still My Chemical Romance?" Will teases him. Nico scowls at him. "I kid- actually no I don't." Will makes a quick turn and thrust open Nico's closet. It's a total mess and explosion of black clothing. He's unsure if he should be embarrassed or not. Either way, he is. "This… not bad...this one is actually better- okay, I got one." Will throws his newfound sartorial choice. Nico catches it in his hands and looks quizzingly at them. "Nice non-ripped jeans, striped black and white button-up… just wear black sneakers and comb your hair out of your face a bit," Will instructs him.

Nico nods. "Not a bad choice." He laments. WIlls rolls his eyes and scoffs.

"I'm gay- course I have some style. What's your excuse?" He says snarkily.

Nico can only blink back at him. Gay, gay, he's gay. Oh of course he's gay! His inner monologue is stupid. I'm gay, he's gay. Oh my gods, we're both gay. I could date him! I wanna date him? Do I? No! I don't! Maybe? Yes? No? He has great arms… it wouldn't be bad. And a pretty cute smile- plus he's gay. Wait… why is he staring at me with that look? Nico opens his mouth but no words come out. Wills starts to full-on laugh. He's laughing, oh my gods, I'm dead. It's cute… AH I'M EVEN MORE SCREWED! Wow, his arms… I should watch him do his blood tests one day. Nope...that's weird. But would it be hot? Probably…AUGH!

"Are you okay?" Will gasps in between his chuckles. Whatever is happening in Nico's mind is the mental equivalent to a keyboard smash.

"Yep." Nico says, preparing to shadow travel. He steps backwards into the shadow and begins to melt away.

But much to his shock, Will's eyes widen and his hands shots out, grabbing Nico by his hoodie sleeve. Will drags him back into the light and aggressively points a finger in his face. His expression is a mix between worry and lot's of anger. He's never been like this before. Nico is shocked and weirdly intrigued.

"You're not getting away with that- not from me at least." Will scolds him. Nico stares at him blankly. He's mad… it's lowkey hot. Uh- should I be breathing right now because I don't think I am. I mean, he's a doctor he could fix me. NO! BAD IDEA! I've never seen him so mad. Or mad at all. Huh. Huh... I don't think my brain is functioning. "-as your doctor… it is an order." Will finish but Nico caught only 10% of what he said. Nico gulps, not out of fear but out of… well he doesn't even know.

"Noted." Nico says dryly. Will huffs and nods, looking at him with a fierce glare. It's now he understands why Percy gets that stupid dazed look on his face when Annabeth is yelling at him. He's really hot right now and I don't think that's okay. Nico wants to shadow travel again but it would probably be risky. Not that he doesn't want to see angry Will again, it's more so… he's already pushed it.

"Good." Will says haughty before leaving the cabin.

Nico stares out his window till Will's curly blonde hair is no longer visible. He then falls into his bed, face first into a pillow. He blinks into the pillow- and does so for a very long time. His brain is fried and it is because of Will.

I'm panicking

"I need your help."

"Really?"

"Yes! Please help me now!"

"Okay, okay, what for?"

Nico looks around him and then back at the IM. "I think I'm panicking." She raises a brow at him and drily says, no duh. He glares at her; Renya isn't phased in the slightest. "But really- I feel like my heart is about to explode."

"Is your heartbeat really going that fast?" Renya questions. Nico throws his arms up in the air.

"Maybe? Probably not?" Nico sighs and drags a hand down his face. "...I saw Will." He admits.

Renya's face turns into an interested smile. "Go on."She says. Nico feels his face heating up and the following urge to jump into an ice bath. Gods, he hated blushing like a ten-year-old girl.

"Everyone was going swimming…" He continues. The smirk on Renya's face grows. "-and I decided that maybe I should go too, you know, for fun." He mumbles.

"Nice to hear you're not hermit shelling yourself." Renya teases. Nico glares at her. SHe only shrugs.

"But-" Nico points up a finger. "Will and his sibling decided to go swimming in the lake too. Which I guess makes sense or whatever, everyone in camp is burning up today but I still wasn't expecting it."Nico ignores Renya's snickers.

"You didn't realize that he: as a part of the camp, was going swimming in the lake?"

"Shut up!"

"You literally called me to freak out over this."

Nico just nearly swipes at the message. "I discovered his arms a couple of weeks ago and I couldn't look at him the same; now I've seen him without a shirt and I can't look at him, full stop. He's hot- like really hot. Literally looks like his dad; what do I do?" Nico walks around in a circle in his cabin, tugging at his hair in a frenzy. "I stared at him for a complete minute. I don't think I breathed or blinked or moved at all. Just- I stood there." He continues.

"Nico." Renya says seriously. "You're panicking." She deadpans. He turns to scowl at her. She raises a brow in defiance.

"I know that!" He cries out. His eyes catch to the uncovered window where there is a perfect view of bare-torso Will ran by. He is silently laughing, hair flying back and eyes nearly closed. Nico gulps and his brain pauses for a minute or two. How are the campers around him even functioning!? It's like watching a piece of art but not in an objectifying way. "I'm gay panicking but it's fine." Nico sputters out. The words are a total mess that falls in front of him. Renya cackles like a witch.

"Will walked by?"

"Yes!"

Nico grabs a blanket from his bed and huddles it around his body. He groans loudly and falls to the ground. Renya's eyes trail down with him, quietly witnessing his breakdown. She doesn't even make a sound as he mutters deliriously about how Will is affecting him and that his brain is now melted.

"You know, it may just help to tell him you like him. Might stop the panicking." Renya offers. Nico glares at her from the ground and forces an arm out to wave around madly.

"What part of-" His arms are now a helicopter rotor. "-this makes you think I could confess."

Renya rolls her eyes. "You're an emo depressed boy, not an emo anxious boy." She says drily.

"I could be both!"

"But you're not." Reyna chuckles. "It's fine to tell him you like him. He's not as blind as Percy; he's as gay as you are so that means he knows what he's doing. You've said it before, he's very clearly smirked while you blushed. Why not tell him? Will's not the type to lead a person on. He probably is just waiting his time and having fun with it. It's more torturous for you than him." Nico makes a sound of pure gay panic for an impressibly long time. Renya allows him to do so. "I gotta go soon." She looks off the IM for a second and nods. "However, you still need to at least consider it." She points at him threateningly.

Nico nods meekly from the floor and watches wordlessly as the IM disappears.

If anyone is able to actually die from gay panicking, Nico's is very clearly, unwilling, trying to accomplish it.

Nico wants to die but he can't seem to turn off his mouth. The words he was spilling weren't the ones he had practiced with Renya but Will is smiling at them nonetheless. He's sure the red on his face has taken over and he's become a tomato head. Nico feels miserable and thanks all deities for making sure no one else is walking onto the scene.

"-so yeah that's kinda what I wanted to say...yeah." Nico prays for his father's realm.

Will lets out a laugh and if it wasn't so horribly sweet and cute, Nico would have shadow travelled away. "That's very nice and brave of you to say." Will says. He leans out and presses a kiss to Nico's cheek. Nico nearly falls over. "And I like you too. But I've been waiting for you to make a move since you started staring at my arms like a lifeline." Nico gasps and points at Will accusingly.

"You noticed?"

"How could I not."

Nico glares at him harshly. "I don't like you no more." He mutters. Wills sighs but with a smile on his face. He opens his arms and closes them around Nico's form. Nico is shocked by the fact that he is still standing. His inner mind is frozen still. "Oh." He says dumbly.

Will chuckles, the sound resonates lowly and vibrates from his chest to Nico. "Does this makeup for it?"

Nico scowls but doesn't deny anything. His heart is beating much faster than it should but it's kinda okay with him. He decides that, yes the hug makes up for the torture Will put him through: freaking arm tease. It's warm and comforting and he really likes how Will smells.

"Yeah. It does."