"WHAT THE FRAG ARE YOU DOING?!"

Lockdown blinked, looking up from the table to the doorway. "Oh. Hey Swindle."

"Don't Hey Swindle Me! What The Frag Are You Doing?!"

"What's it look like I'm doin'? I'm takin' a dead bot's body apart."

"I can see that! And I can also see THAT!" Swindle pointed at the dead bot laid out on the table. Or, more accurately, he was pointing at the small sparkling sitting casually inside the offline bot's chest. The sparkling was a small femme who looked like a mix of both adult Cybertronians, with Swindle's servos and torso, and Lockdown's stabilizers and face marks on her light grey face. From her helm to her peds she was covered in Energon and other fluids, hiding her colors under the mess she didn't seem to mind.

Lockdown took a small glance at the sparkling, shrugged, and looked back at Swindle. "An'?"

"WHAT IS SHE DOING IN THERE?!" Swindle exclaimed, crossing the room and taking in the sight with his face twisting in disgust and horror. Spinning on his tire heels, he glared angrily at Lockdown while pointing at the sparkling. "Don't you know how unsanitary that is?! How many corrupt damaging nanites she could get just sitting in there covered in that filth?! Sparkling her age can get viruses just being near this! Viruses Lockdown! Viruses!"

"Would ya calm down already? She's jus' sittin' there."

"COVERED HELM TO PEDS WITH ALL THE GRIME AND DIRTY ENERGON! Who Knows What This Bot Put In Their Systems!" Lockdown kept his intake shut as Swindle looked towards the sparkling and grimace. "Uhgk! This is going to take more than a single bath to get her all cleaned up. How could you let her get so dirty Lockdown?"

"Hey, she was the one who wanted ta get in there an' I couldn't stop her." Swindle gave him a deadpanned looked before rolling his optics.

"You could have at least tried to keep her clean." Swindle sighed, reaching for the sparkling. "Come on Scarlet, let's get you cleaned up."

"No!" Swindle's servos flinched back at the sharp cry, blinking in shock at the little femmling glaring at him. "No 'ath!"

The merchant's shoulders drooped as his intake formed into a sad frown. "Scarlet…"

"No! No 'ath! 'Ath yes… yeser… yessserrr—"

"Yesterday." Lockdown crossed his arms. "Ya had a bath yesterday."

"No 'Ath!" Scarlet screamed, raising a servo and slammed it down on the dead bot's chest, splashing a puddle of oil. "No 'Ath! No 'Ath! No 'Ath!" Scarlet kept loudly chanting, splashing the dirty oil all over.

Swindle's face morphed into horror, his servos hanging in the air as he watched the femmling get herself dirtier and dirtier. Lockdown just watched the whole thing with one corner of his intake twitching upwards at the sight of Swindle's growing grief. Leaning close to the mech, Lockdown smirked as he spoke in a low voice. "Havin' a sparklin' was yer idea ya know."

Swindle snapped out of his stupefy and shot Lockdown a hard glare. "And you were the one who agreed on having one." The con-mech hissed. Lockdown shrugged but his smirk didn't go away. Sighing heavily, Swindle once again tried to take Scarlet out of the dead bot. "Come on sweetie. You need to be cleaned."

"NO!" Scarlet dug her servos deeper into the bot's chest, grabbing dead wiring and tubes as Swindle wrapped his digits around her and tried pulling her out.

"Scarlet, pllllllease." Swindle groaned, trying his hardest not to hurt her while also trying to pull her out. He had hoped that the oil covering her servos would make her grip slip and make it easier for him to get her out, however he had underestimated how stubbornly strong the femmling was and only managed to get her lower half out while her upper half remained inside the dead bot. "Scarlet!"

"NonononononononononononoNO!" Scarlet screamed, kicking her short stabilizers. "NOOOOO!

Swindle's frown deepened at his sparkling's continual stubbornness, shooting a glare over his shoulder to the snickering Lockdown. "You know, you could help."

"Nah. Ya seem ta got this." Lockdown snickered at the display before him and hardly fazed by the glares Swindle was shooting at him.

"Oh sure. Let me do all the work as usual." Swindle huffed. "I only just carried her for eleven orbital cycles and seem to be the only one to worry about all the potential health hazards you keep putting her into!"

"Yer the one who keeps tryin' ta brin' her ta every business deals ya get called up on." Lockdown pointed out.

Swindle groaned loudly. "That was ONE. TIME."

"That was enough times fer me ta get a spark attack with the danger ya already put yerself in yer line of work. I don't need my kid in the mix yet."

"Oh how nice of you." Swindle muttered, giving one last pull before letting out a groan. "Scarlet, sweet spark, please. It'll be a quick bath, I promise."

"NO 'ATH!"

Swindle groaned in defeat. He went silent a moment before his optics lit up and a sly smirk crossed his face. "Scarlet. If you let go and take a bath, I'll give you your favorite cookie~"

Scarlet's peds froze, ceasing their kicks. Slowly the little femme turned her helm, peeking at Swindle with her large red cat-like optics. "… 'ooey 'ooey Enni cokies?"

Swindle's smirk grew, reaching into his subspace and taking out a small box. "Gooey Gooey Enni Cookies." He shook the box, making Scarlet's optics grow. "And you can have one…" He held it out, shaking its contents inside. "IF." He yanked the box away, making Scarlet puff out her cheeks. "You let go and take a bath."

Scarlet went quiet a moment, making a cute little face as she thought it over. "… No!" She turned her helm away quickly.

Swindle's smirk didn't waver. "Are you sure? They're a fresh batch." He shook the box again. "And I know how much you love it when your favorite cookies are fresh. How soft and extra gooey they are and perfectly warm that they just melt in your intake at the first bite." Scarlet peeked over her shoulder, looking conflicted but kept her gaze locked on the box. Swindle gave her a moment to think it over before going in for the kill. "If you take a bath right now and behave, I'll give you two cookies."

Times ticked slowly as both mechs waited for the young spark's reaction. After a full cycle, the femmling huffed and crossed her arms. "Fiiiiiine."

"Atta girl!" Swindle beamed as he lifted his daughter up. "Now let's get you cleaned up before you start to rust."

"Fast 'ath, ok?" Scarlet whined as she was carried away.

"Of course! I always keep my promises!"

"Only when they benefit ya Swin!" Lockdown called out with a smirk, ducking the wrench Swindle tossed at his helm.

"I'll be back to deal with you later!" Swindle growled. "And put that body away before Scarlet manages to get herself in there again!" The merchant huffed, carrying a smirking Scarlet through the door which Lockdown only rolled his optics but didn't stop his smug smirk.