Lay Your Weary Head To Rest

Carry on my wayward son

There'll be peace when you are done

Lay your weary head to rest

Don't you cry no more

Kansas, Carry On Wayward Son

After climbing back to the surface, relieved to leave the River of Lost Souls behind, Killian Jones and the former ruler of Camelot part ways, and Killian watches Arthur disappear in the direction of the town hall. Just when he's about to turn towards the blinding light, he hears someone call out to him.

"Killian?"

The voice catapults him right back into the past, decades at first, and then even farther, centuries. The memories assault him with a force that makes him stumble as he turns away from the light again to look at the man who spoke to him. He looks exactly like when he last saw him - the black hair long and wavy, dark eyes, the beard a little longer than he remembers.

His lips form the word all by themselves. "Father."

His father's voice, rich and deep in his memories, is now broken. "The rumors are true then."

Killian's brain is empty, and even though his heart isn't beating, of course, it's like the blood is rushing through his veins loudly, and he forgets to breathe, even though he doesn't have to.

"Rumors?" he echoes, and his father nods slowly, scrutinizing him over and over incredulously.

"The word is that... Captain Hook came down here." Brennan Jones takes a few steps nearer, closing the remaining distance between them, before he adds, "And he died a hero's death."

The ghost of a smile flickers over his handsome face, and Killian remembers the last words his father spoke to him with his last dying breath, while he was sinking to the ground, life trickling out of him with the blood drawn by his son's blade. It's never too late. You can change. Be a different man. For a moment, they look at each other silently, both still trying to process what's happening here.

Killian tilts his head. "That's overstating it a little," he answers with hesitation in his voice.

"What happened to you?" his father asks softly.

"The Dark One," Killian replies dryly, and his father frowns.

"Your revenge?" he inquires.

Killian drops his gaze and lets it linger on his hand, the hand he used to stab his own father. "I let go of it," he then says and swallows, looking back at the man before him.

It's not like he owes him any further explanation, but he feels like he owes him at least… something, maybe some sort of closure and peace, and he just wants him to know that his last words fell on fertile ground in the end.

"I found True Love," he continues and blinks furiously to keep the tears at bay that are welling up in his eyes when he's reminded once more of the fact that Emma is lost to him forever. Then he looks his father in the eyes again and adds, "I found it in me to change. And when I died, I... " He pauses for a moment and swallows hard while his father hangs on to every word he's uttering. Then he finishes, "I died being the man I wanted to be."

"Oh, Killian." Brennan's eyes light up and he raises his hand as if he wants to put it on his shoulder, but then he pulls back again, not daring to. "The moment I got down here," he tells him, "I started to look für your brother, but I couldn't find him!" Sadly, he shakes his head, then pulls himself together and nods, like he's trying to soothe himself. "But I assume that means he moved on."

"He did," Killian assures him quickly, and his father looks at him questioningly. "I met him. He had some… unfinished business, but he dealt with it, and he moved on. He's in a better place now." Brennan closes his eyes in relief and nods again with a sigh. Killian draws a deep breath, guilt and remorse suddenly suffocating him. "Father…"

"You have to believe me," Brennan interrupts him fervently and grabs his upper arm, "once I set foot ashore, I regretted what I'd done, and I swore to myself that I'd do everything to get back to you and Liam!"

Killian clenches his jaw to keep his emotions under control and nods, not replying, because it's clear his father isn't done yet. And if he deserves closure, after the life and long years of villainy he lived, then so does his father, and it's very obvious that he's the only one who can help him achieve that. So he lets him talk.

And Brennan Jones, encouraged by his long lost son's nod, keeps talking. "I was a coward, and selfish," he says with self-contempt in his voice, a sentiment that feels all too familiar to Killian. "It was much easier to run from my problems than to face them," he continues, his voice rising with every word, "and by the time I wanted to turn back, it was too late." He lets go of Killian's arm and drops his head wearily, running his hand through his hair. "When I realized they were going to put me under a sleeping curse," he mutters tonelessly, "I knew that was it, and I could never make up for what I had done... to my beautiful boys." At his last words, his voice breaks, and so does Killian's heart.

He remembers very vividly his first love's remorse and pain, and that not a day had gone by Milah hadn't thought about Bae and regretted leaving him. What his father had done to him and Liam couldn't be compared to Milah's abandoning of her son, of course - but the despair of not being able to atone for one's mistakes is the same.

Killian looks down at his father's dark head, his whole miserable figure standing there before him like petrified, and what else can he do than raise his hand and put it on his father's shoulder, squeezing it. "Father," he repeats softly.

Slowly, Brennan raises his head, and Killian is not surprised to see the tears on his face. "I know it's too–"

"I forgive you," he interrupts, and he means it. He finds that it makes his own heart a lot lighter. "And I know Liam would, too," he adds.

Brennan nods and squeezes his eyes shut, sending more tears down his cheeks, a puffed breath coming out almost as a sob.

"Can you forgive me, too?" Killian asks in a rough voice and inclines his head a little, his own tears trickling out of his eyes now.

"Gods, I already have, my son," Brennan says firmly and reaches up to grab Killian's forearm. "A long time ago."

It's only a tiny move, more a weight shift, and he leans forward to touch his forehead to his son's. They stand in silence for a few moments, a few wounds healing without needing any more words.

Finally, Brennan murmurs the only question left between them. "And my other son?"

For a moment, Killian has allowed himself to forget about the boy he'd turned into an orphan, simply leaving him to his fate, another boy whose life he'd destroyed, and a heavy guilt settles in his stomach again.

"I… I don't know what happened to him," he admits. "I just…" Putting it in words seems to make it even more terrible, and he shrugs helplessly. "I just walked away."

Brennan swallows and nods, not letting go of Killian's arm. "He's still alive, I can feel it," he says firmly.

"I couldn't think clearly," Killian tries to explain, "I was so full of hatred…"

"I know," his father soothes, and it seems like their roles are reversed now. "And I was responsible for that hatred."

Killian shakes his head, his fingers clutching his father's sleeve. "But the boy… my brother… he was innocent!"

"Aye, but-"

"We're going to wait for him!" Killian says, "and we can-"

"No!" Brennan interrupts fervently. "I'll wait for him, and you are going to move on, like you're supposed to!" He nods his head towards the portal of blinding light behind Killian that's patiently glowing, like it's beckoning him nearer.

"But I can't-"

"You can," Brennan cuts him off and grasps his face with both hands, "and you will, do you hear me? I'm not going to let you sacrifice your well-deserved chance to move on to a better place!"

"Father…"

"Yes, I am your father, so allow me to be your father and let me take this responsibility off your shoulders." He locks his dark eyes with Killian's blue ones, like he did so many decades ago in that fateful night, and the gesture has lost nothing of its effect. "I swear I'm going to wait for your younger brother, no matter how long it takes. And then we'll join you and Liam in the afterlife, and we can all be together again."

Killian throws a hesitant look over his shoulder at the shimmering portal or whatever it is, then looks back at his father, who nods. "Go to rest, my son." He brushes his thumbs over Killian's still damp cheeks in a precious gesture and then lets go of his face. "Go."

Brennan takes a step back, deliberately putting distance between them, but this time it doesn't feel like abandonment, not one bit. So, Killian nods with a slight smile, and it feels right that his last look at his father should be a smiling one.

Then he turns around and walks towards the light without looking back.