A/N First time writer here, really nervous about posting so I hope people will enjoy it. I do not own characters etc. For the purpose of this story, Frannie dog doesn't exist.
Amanda Rollins stood on the sidewalk, staring up at the intimidating façade of the Upper West Side brownstone belonging to her captain, Olivia Benson. Each of her hands was wrapped around one of her daughters', Jesse who has just turned five and Billie, who was almost two.
They had been invited, along with the rest of the SVU squad, to Olivia's for Thanksgiving dinner, and Amanda was feeling nervous. She had deep seated feelings for her boss, she had done for a long time, ever since she moved to New York and laid eyes on the enigmatic Detective Benson.
They had had a somewhat tumultuous relationship over the years, but since Jesse had been born, the two women had grown closer, the bond of motherhood creating a strong friendship between them, even if Amanda longed for more.
They spent a lot of time together outside of work, entertaining Amanda's girls and Olivia's son, Noah, who's eighth birthday was only a week away. They went on trips to the park and the zoo, and to the beach in the summer as well as movie days, meals together, and quite often, impromptu sleepovers.
Many times, Amanda had resolved to tell Olivia how she really felt, and every time, she had chickened out, convincing herself that friendship was better than nothing, and that Olivia couldn't possibly feel the same way.
You will happily face down serial killers and rapists, Rollins, but you can't tell Olivia you're in love with her? She had berated herself many times over the years.
Looking up at the four-storey sandstone building, Amanda swallowed and, taking a deep breath, started up the steps to the ornate front door. "Mama, can I press the button?" came Jesse's sweet, high voice, level with her right hip.
She looked down at her five-year-old and smiled, "Sure kiddo," and she hoisted the little girl awkwardly onto her hip with one hand, keeping a firm hold on Billie with the other, so Jesse could reach to press the doorbell. Truly, Jesse was a miniature version of herself, with one difference. Her eyes were a deep, rich brown, not dissimilar to a certain SVU captain's chocolatey orbs that Amanda often found herself getting lost in.
A deep clanging chime echoed somewhere within the confines of the house as Jesse slid down her mother's leg back to the ground. After a few seconds they could hear light racing footsteps inside, and they saw Noah through the glass panelled door, running excitedly down the hall to greet their guests. "Mom," he called over his shoulder, his chestnut curls bouncing as he moved, "Aunt Manda is here, with Jesse and Billie." They heard Olivia say something in reply, but couldn't hear what she said.
Noah opened the door with a huge grin on his face. "Hi Aunt Manda, hi Jesse, hi Billie," he said breathlessly, standing aside to let them in. They all said 'Hi' back, and no sooner had they crossed the threshold, than Noah had taken Billie by the hand and called, "Come on Billie, Jesse, I want to show you what Uncle Fin brought." The three little ones scurried away, leaving Amanda stood in the entry way, smiling and shaking her head at their retreating backs.
She began removing her coat taking in the unfamiliar surroundings, dark hardwood floor and pale painted walls, she turned to the side, smiling as she recognised the coat rack that had stood for many years at Olivia's old apartment. The rack had been a housewarming gift from Amanda when Olivia had first moved in with Cassidy, way back in 2013. It warmed her to think Olivia valued it enough to bring it with her to the new place.
Olivia had moved into the townhouse a couple of months ago, not long after she had been promoted to captain. None of the squad had been to the house before today. She had opted to pay for a removal company to help get all her stuff from the apartment to the house, explaining that she wanted to get the house in order before inviting guests. A month later she had extended the invitation to a joint thanksgiving/ house warming party to Fin, Kat, Carisi, and Amanda and her girls.
Amanda thought the place looked very… Olivia. The perfect mix of traditional and modern, elegance and style without looking cold. As she completed her assessment of the foyer, she heard footsteps behind her. Turning, she saw Olivia walk through a doorway to her left, wiping her hands on a dish towel, smiling warmly at her guest.
The brunette wore tight dark jeans that hugged her in all the right places, a plain black tank top with a beige cardigan over it that was open, and fell to the top of her thighs, the colour accentuating her olive skin tone perfectly. She had her recently cut chin-length hair half up half down, which opened up her face, and, in Amanda's opinion, looked beautiful. The hairstyle coupled with Liv wearing very little make up, made the brunette look much younger than her 53 years.
"Amanda, hi!" Olivia approached the blonde, pulling her into a hug and giving her a peck on the cheek, Amanda felt herself go red, the skin where the older woman's lips had touched her tingled. "Welcome. Where are the kids?"
"Um, Noah wanted to show them something, they ran that way," she pointed to the doorway Liv had appeared from. The captain rolled her eyes, playfully, "that boy!" she exclaimed dramatically. "He's over the moon because Fin has bought him a Scalextric race track. They're setting it up in the den."
Amanda reached into her bag, bringing out a bottle of red wine she knew Olivia liked, and handed it shyly to her host. "Just a little thank you for having us over," she smiled softly.
Liv smiled back, "you didn't need to do that, Manda. I'm just glad you agreed to come early and help me with the cooking." She squeezed Amanda's shoulder lightly. "Come on into the kitchen, I'll get you a drink and we can get started."
Amanda excused herself to go and fetch something from the car. She returned moments later, carrying a large homemade sweet potato pie ready for dessert. Olivia's eyes widened at the sight of it. "Oh my goodness, Amanda, that looks amazing!" she gushed, "Did you make that?"
"Sure," Amanda grinned, "my mama may not have taught me much, but I used to cook with my grandma when I was a kid. We always made the pie for thanksgiving, so I thought it would be nice to make one for the party."
Amanda followed Liv through the door she had appeared through. To her left was a large open den, where Noah and Jesse were on the floor beside the large glass coffee table, putting together pieces of race track. They were being directed by Fin, who sat on one end of the large new L-shaped sofa with Billie on his lap. Billie was entertaining herself by sticking one of the cars in her mouth and drooling all over it, staring absently at the flat screen TV on the wall, that was playing cartoons quietly in the background.
With an indulgent shake of her head at the kids' antics, Amanda waved 'hi' to Fin before turning right into the kitchen, where she put the pie down, marvelling at the state-of-the-art space Liv had. A huge turkey was already roasting away in one half of a double oven, and pots and pans stood empty, waiting to be filled on a large eight-ring gas burner along the back wall.
"Liv, this place is amazing," she said in an awestruck voice, leaning her elbows against the massive granite-topped island, looking around the cavernous space.
"Thanks," Liv replied with a small chuckle as she pulled bags of vegetables out of the stainless-steel refrigerator. "I actually have to cook now though. I feel guilty ordering takeout when I have all this." She gestured around her at the extensive storage space and kitchen appliances.
Amanda washed her hands in the stylish farmhouse sink, peering out of the back window to see a small neat yard. It was mostly lawn, with a border of plants that were sure to be a riot of colour in the spring and summer months, but at the moment were various shades of green and brown.
Following Amanda's line of sight, Olivia added ruefully, "I also need to learn how to keep plants alive. I never had a garden before so, that could be interesting." She frowned slightly.
The blonde, who had grown up in rural Georgia, and had plenty of experience with gardens, rolled her eyes at her captain. "It's easy enough Liv, but if you run into trouble, just holler."
She dried her hands on the dish towel, then moved to the chopping block on the island, picked up a knife and set about helping Olivia to prepare the trimmings for dinner. As they peeled and chopped, Amanda relaxed a little, no doubt aided by the glass of wine Liv provided her with, and they talked while they worked.
They chatted about the kids and their shenanigans and how Liv was settling into the new house. They both laughed heartily when Amanda told a story about the time they had tried to deep fry the turkey back home, and it had gone horribly wrong.
Over the next hour or so, the rest of the guests arrived, necessitating Liv going to the door to greet them now that Noah was fully engrossed in the race track Uncle Fin had brought. Before long they had a full house. Carisi and Kat arrived together, then John Munch appeared and not long after him, their former captain, Don Cragen. Fin had already been there when Amanda arrived.
Amanda smiled when she saw Fin was not here alone. He had been joined by the M.E., Melinda Warner, and they seemed very cosy together. "It's about time those two got together," she murmured to Liv as she passed behind her on her way to the oven, nodding towards her partner and his girlfriend. "They've been dancing around each other for as long as I've known them."
"Longer," Liv whispered back, "you know how, in cartoons, they have the hearts in their eyes in romantic scenes?" Amanda nodded. "well, that's what Fin looked like when I first introduced him to Mel, like, eighteen, no, nineteen years ago."
"Nineteen years?" Amanda asked incredulously, "wow, that is a hell of a long time to crush on someone for. That's…" she cut herself off, realising the irony of what she was saying as she stood before the woman that she had been crushing on for almost a decade. Shaking her head, partly at herself, partly at Fin, she took a sip of her wine.
Liv closed the oven door, straightening up she tossed the oven mitts onto the counter, then leaned against it right beside Amanda. "Well, Melinda was married when they first met," she shrugged, "I know Fin makes out like he's a thug, but he's got too much honour to break up a marriage. So, he pined over her from a distance for about a decade, then, as you know, Mel moved away for a while."
Liv picked up her own glass of wine, now glancing over her shoulder across the open plan space to where Fin and Mel were watching Carisi entertain the kids. The two female cops watched as Fin placed a hand on Melinda's knee, and she put her hand over his, both of them grinning dopily at one another. Amanda sighed, "I won't give up hope just yet then. If they can find their way to one another after nearly twenty years, maybe I stand a chance after all." She finished her wine, feeling the flush in her cheeks from the alcohol.
"You got your eye on somebody, Rollins?" Liv asked playfully, nudging the blonde lightly with her shoulder. Her expression was humorous, but with a hint of something less definable that was gone before Amanda could work it out.
"Wouldn't you like to know, Captain?" she replied coyly, winking at Liv and laughing.
Liv had to swallow hard before joining in with Amanda's laughter. "Maybe if I keep plying you with wine, you'll tell me," Liv wiggled her eyebrows conspiratorially as she refilled the younger woman's wine glass. They were done in the kitchen for the time being, so they headed to the den, joining in a conversation with Cragen and Munch.