I do not own Star Wars The Clone Wars. this was something I wrote a few years ago. Ahsokas perspective on the events that led to her walking away from the order.
"You're stuck with me Skyguy."
"I'm sorry master. But I'm not coming back."
Ahsoka stood before the council after proving her innocence, or rather after Anakin proved her innocence right as she was about to be put to death for a crime she never comitted. Next to her stood the jedi knight who had trained her even though he hadn't initially wanted a padawan learner.
The Togruta former padawan heard Plo Koons apology but found it hard to forgive him for abandoning her. The jedi master had been the one to find her and take her to the jedi temple all those years ago. How could he so easily turn on her? Did he not know her better than that?
"This was actually your great trial. We see that now." Mace Windu spoke, his eyes on the sixteen year old. Ahsoka crossed her arms, she was unimpressed by the deflection. For that's exactly what it was; a deflection.
"Back into the order you may come." Yoda said looking up at Ahsoka. She turned her gaze to the small green grand master. Many feelings were welled up in her. Not even Yoda had trusted her.
"They're asking you back Ahsoka." Anakin started as he turned to Ahsoka. The gaze in his blue eyes was soft. Gentle. "I'm asking you back." The general opened his hand causing shock to fill her. He had kept the silka beads that had marked her his padawan.
Ahsoka repeatedly glanced from the beads to the hopeful gaze of her former master. The jedi order had been her entire life. She wanted nothing more to stay; but she knew she couldn't. The council hadn't trusted her. Even Obi Wan who had been on more missions with her and Anakin than any other jedi had turned his back on her.
How could Ahsoka trust herself after this? more to the point how could Ahsoka trust anyone but Anakin not to turn on her or anyone else again? After all it had been her best friend who set her up. The Togruta reached out, feeling despair at the hope that got higher only to die and show a look of pain and despair that she felt as she closed Anakins hand.
"I'm sorry master. But I'm not coming back." Ahsoka said before letting go of his hand. She turned and walked out of the room.
It wasn't long before she heard fast paced footsteps behind her. She didn't have to turn to know it was her former master.
"Ahsoka wait! Ahsoka I need to talk to you!" Anakin called out desperately. He couldn't lose her.
Ahsoka stopped. She didn't turn just yet. She waited for the general to speak and didn't have to wait long.
"Why are you doing this?" It was a plea for answers. It didn't take much for her to realize this.
"The council didn't trust me. So how can I trust myself?" Ahsoka questioned. She crossed her arms as if it would shield her against the pain she currently held.
"What about me? I believed in you! I stood by you!"
Ahsoka turned to look at Anakin. "I know you believe in me, Anakin, and I'm grateful for that; but this isn't about you. I can't stay here any longer." She turned away as she continued. "Not now.."
Anakin kept trying. He couldn't just let her walk away. The jedi order is your life..You can't just throw it away like this! Ahsoka you are making a mistake!"
Ahsoka turned her gaze back to Anakin. She knew this was hurting him as much as it did her. "Maybe. But I have to sort this out on my own. Without the council and without you."
Ahsoka turned away fully this time. She and Anakin stood back to back. She knew he wasn't done. Ahsoka also knew that Anakin realized she wouldn't stay.
"I understand." Anakin started off. "More than you realize. I understand wanting to walk away from the order."
Ahsoka knew this. She knew about Padme. She didn't know how deep it went but she knew they were at least together. "I know."
With that spoken Ahsoka began walking very much aware of her former master staring after her with saddened blue eyes. She walked down the steps, away from her life as a jedi. One door opened and another closed. This would be a new begining for her without the order.