"When you are born in a burning house, you think that the world is on fire

But it's not."

- Richard Kardey, Aloha in Hell

"A toast to the long life of Signor of Orseofilo!" A tall man wearing a military uniform stood from where he sat, raising a glass of champagne. "And for young master to continue the family legacy!"

The other participants raised their respective glasses of the best quality of champagne. Signor Orseofilo rose from his seat, the smug smirk on his face becoming duller for a second at the mention of the young master he had yet to address for the night.

Even to the trained eye, they could only see the perfect posture of the youngest one in the room. It was his turn to give a customary speech for the incumbent head of the county. This is already the tenth generation trusted by the Pope and the royal family to continue with the trade, and to lead their cause to victory no matter what.

With a trained smile, their attention was turned to the smaller man who seemed to be so comfortable in such setting. "With grandfather's stubbornness and tenacity, we all know that the county will not worry about passing the torch any time soon." The young Orseofilo started, garnering laughter from the guests. He continued with the accomplished plans and those that are being implemented all with the blessings of Count Orseofilo for the betterment of their county. He finally ended with a sigh, his chest visibly heaving under the scrutiny of the Count who gave a thin-lipped smile in return. "May you live long and healthy, Count Orseofilo!"

The crowd gave a round of applause.

When the celebration came to an end, the count and his successor were left sending their guests on their way.

The count chanced upon his grandchild loosening the tie on his neck to get more air. "And people wonder why I cannot retire even though I have you, Lucca." He shook his head in disapproval as he wondered until when this ruse would go on.

"Whatever do you mean, Lord Gabriel?" Lucca attempted to straighten the tie, and hide the weariness.

"You cannot even go on without having to take a break." His grip on his cane tightened. "Next time, get a looser clothing so you can loosen your bindings."

Lucca placed his hands on his back, and stood straight. "Do not worry, my lord. I will strive to learn not to breathe in the future."

"You can act all high and mighty now, but when they learn-" Gabriel was surprised when his passive grandchild made a beeline towards the corner, ignoring him when Lucca would usually absorb his scoldings.

"Lady Elena, how long have you been here?" Lucca kissed her hand, and led her towards the waiting area of the carriages.

"I just arrived. The paintings of your castle really blows me away, Lord Lucca." She held the hand Lucca offered to her as they walked down the steps. Elena noticed that Lucca pulled away slightly when she came too close to his body. Neither addressed that matter, and pretended that everything is fine.

When they reached the carriage, Lucca opened the door for her and helped her get in. They were greeted by a man with a weird hair style, giving them a disconcerting smirk.

Lucca tilted his head slightly to the side in bewilderment.

"Do not worry, Spade is with me." Elena reassured Lucca as she took Spade's hand to help her get in the carriage. "It was a lovely dinner. I look forward to your next painting collection. Please send my regards to Count Orseofilo, Lord Lucca."

Lucca gave a smile. "Take care, my lady." He gave a curt nod to Spade. He was wise enough to know that Spade is of noble blood, judging by his weird hair and not so coordinated clothes of the finest quality.

Lucca did not really care, though. The sooner the guests leave, the sooner Lucca can go in the comfort of her room. Keeping up the ruse of a confident young man takes a lot of strength.

Now, when that was settled, it was hard to resist the urge to loosen the tie when the head of the family had just given a reprimand.

"Forgive me, my lord. There was an urgent matter."

Gabriel pursed his lips at the display of masochism. Lucca should have not returned to back when given the chance. Although, a part of Gabriel was relieved that this child would do anything for the family, there is also a sense of anger and dread that came with that filiality.

"Just get some rest. I have no need of you for tomorrow." He ordered the young one. "Marietta has been scolding me of the bad effects of keeping the tight bindings in your body."

Lucca has been trained to read between the lines, and know the meaning behind every word. Words are another type of weapon, and battling with words is another war. It would be bad if my successor becomes indisposed because of those bindings.

Gabriel was never fond of Lucca, that was very much clear since the child had known how to perceive and understand. Even so, they are in a mutually beneficial relationship, and leaving the other would only lead to more cons on both sides.

Lucca wondered what came to Gabriel that night when escorting him to his bed chambers. Only his butler await inside the room to help the lord change to his sleeping wear.

Gabriel lifted Lucca's face and scrutinized the younger one. Both displayed no emotions. He moved her face slightly to the side. "Your mother has to give me a final blow by dumping you to me. It would have been better if you do not have your father's eyes." He remembered that man with bright eyes like sky at dusk. He should not have taken in such bold man if he knew then that his daughter would be a victim of those eyes.

And Gabriel had to spend the rest of his days, looking at those damn eyes as if mocking him for trying to take back his own daughter.

"You claimed that my mother is your dearly beloved child, my lord." Lucca felt his grip tightened but not tight enough to leave a mark.

"Until she chose that peasant over the family." Gabriel pulled his hand and motioned for Lucca to leave him.

Lucca dismissed Gabriel's unusually kind behavior to weariness. "Rest well, my lord."

Before Lucca could leave the room, Gabriel weakly said his name. He was looking at the back his successor with an emotion even he could not discern. "You are your mother's daughter, indeed."

Lucca visibly squirmed. "The walls have eyes and the doors have ears, my lord. We almost got caught by Lady Elena."

Both knew that this would be the last time he would acknowledge such fact.

When Lucca finally reached her room, she loosened her tie and removed her jacket. She threw her dress shirt on the ground and removed the bindings on her chest.

For the first time that night, she could breathe well. Tomorrow, her governess will witness the mess she have made, and she will be scolded for it. She let her hair cascade freely and threw the tie in a random direction of her room.

She remembered Lady Elena's smooth hand on her skin and got self-conscious on the scars on her body. But the most painful experience Lucca got to experience was the stifling tightness of her bindings on her chest, and the painful cramps that came with blood oozing out of her body every month as if to remind her that she cannot live and think for herself.

For that, Lucca cannot forgive her mother for bringing her to this world.

And herself for clinging on that bleak hope of gaining the love of her grandfather.

Later that night

I held an atlas in my lap

Ran my fingers across and the whole world

And whispered,

Where does it hurt?

It answered,

Everywhere

Everywhere

everywhere

-Warsan Shire