"Feels like a lifetime ago, eh, Rex? To what do I owe the pleasure?" said Cut, looking over at Rex who sat on the opposite end of the Dejarik board. Night had fallen, and the light of the planet's three moons crept through the gaps in the wooden windows of the deserter's home, accompanied by a cool and relaxing breeze. But despite the serenity of the outside world, it was clear to Cut that something was wrong. Rex's vacant expression was a far cry from the disciplined and determined man he'd once met. Studying the soldier's armour, he saw the telltale signs of scorch marks, and a singed hole through the once-impressive blue pauldron. The former captain simply held his helmet in his hands, seemingly lost in thought as he gazed at the sliver of his face reflected back at him from the thin T-visor.
"I know that expression. Something's happened. Look, just... tell me what's up. You can talk to me."
After a moment of silence, Cut spoke up again.
"The Jedi... The Empire says they were executed for treason, but that's not the whole story, is it?"
Finally, he received a response- but Rex's voice held an almost inhuman level of hurt. There was fear, there was sadness, and beneath it all, there was rage.
"The Republic's gone, Cut. This new... 'Empire'... It's...it's what my brothers have been fighting for without even knowing it. We won the war, alright. All of us clones. We fought and bled and died for our victory. We just didn't realise what 'victory' would mean. All this time, we thought we were fighting to protect the galaxy against evil. Against tyranny."
"But you don't believe that anymore, do you?"
Rex shook his head.
"No, I don't."
He paused, before looking up at Cut and continuing.
"Do you know what the Kaminoans did to us? They modified our genetic code. Created organic chips to regulate our behaviour, so that we'd... follow orders... no matter what those orders would entail. We were used, Cut."
"Organic chips, huh? That wouldn't surprise me. The Kaminoans always were control freaks. But... used for what?"
"Eliminating the Jedi. Creating the new Empire. It was part of the plan from the very beginning. Every clone trooper bred on Kamino... Every one of us who gave our lives in the line of duty... We were all just pawns in someone else's game. Our chips were used to make us turn on the Jedi and wipe them out, and now... clones are creating the very same evil we once died to fight against."
"So does that mean you..."
"I didn't kill my Jedi, if that's what you're asking. She found out what was going on, and removed the chip from my head. We had to fight our way out of a Venator caught in the gravitational pull of a small moon, and in the end, we were the only survivors. My men, my brothers, turned on us with unquestioning obedience. In a way... I'm responsible for every single one of their deaths. But I didn't have a choice. I couldn't just give up... right?"
Cut leaned forward, placing a hand on Rex's shoulder.
"You've been through a lot, Rex, but I'm glad you survived. You did what you had to. I'm sure your brothers would agree, if not for their programming. They wouldn't want you to blame yourself."
Rex recoiled slightly at Cut's touch.
"...They were good men. And every single one of them was an individual- each with their own free will and desires. To lose that... It's the worst fate imaginable for us, isn't it? The kind of thing we only ever see in our nightmares."
"Exactly. That's part of the reason I left. To lose my identity and become some nameless number, killed in the line of duty... That's not the kind of future I wanted for myself."
"And I should have listened to you. The last time I was here, you said that the war made no sense to you. At the time, I didn't understand. But as the fighting dragged on, I began questioning the point of it all... though I never questioned far enough. I was too blinded by some misguided sense of 'duty' to see anything beyond my obligation to the Republic. I was so convinced I was fighting for the right side..."
The former Clone Captain's voice weakened, and his gaze turned downwards.
"You know, it was Jesse who brought me here after I took that sniper shot to the chest. He saved my life... and I put him in the ground. Buried in a shallow grave among countless others like him. They say it gets easier, but it never did. Not to me, at least."
"As well it shouldn't. Every brother we lose is a loss worth mourning."
"...I suppose you're right. Look, Cut, I... I came here to warn you. The Empire's cracking down on interplanetary travel, and you need to get out of here before you get stranded. You still have that chip in your head. With the right trigger phrase, you could end up becoming like the rest of the clones. And I don't want you to become another mindless drone. You and your family... You're among the only friends I have left."
The deserter gave Rex a sombre but reassuring smile.
"Thank you, Rex. And what will you do now?"
"What will you do now?"
It was a question that had been on Rex's mind since leaving Ahsoka's side. He still had yet to come up with a good answer.
"...I don't know. I've been a soldier since birth, and I honestly don't know any other way. Fighting for the Republic gave me a cause. A cause to fight for, something greater than myself. It was difficult. I struggled and fought and watched my brothers fall, but it felt meaningful to me. It gave me something to be a part of. It made me feel like I existed for a purpose. And the cruel irony is, I did exist for a purpose- just not the purpose I thought. I believed I was an opponent of tyranny... when all I've truly been is an agent of it."
Cut shook his head.
"That might have been your intended purpose- or rather, the purpose the Kaminoans intended for you- but that doesn't make it your true purpose. You think anyone intended for me to be a defector who left the army to raise a family? A purpose isn't given to you, Rex. It's something you need to discover for yourself."
"And how do I do that?"
"That's up to you. Thanks to your Jedi, you're free. Free of Kaminoan programming, and free from the command structure of the GAR. What are you going to do with that freedom? What do you want to achieve?"
After a brief silence, Rex let out a wry chuckle.
"It's funny... Even after everything that's happened... Part of me still believes there's a cause out there worth fighting for. Is that... Is that wrong?"
"Of course not! To each his own, as I always say. You're a soldier at heart, and a damn good one at that. Just remember that a cause is something you choose to fight for. Not something demanded of you by someone else. I'm confident that you'll find something to fight for one day. And when you do, you'll achieve great things."
The former Captain smiled slightly.
"...thank you, Cut. I'd better get going before my ship draws suspicion, but... I hope I get the chance to see you again."
"You sure you don't want to stay with us? We can leave Saleucami together if-"
"Thanks for the offer, but... there's something I need to do."
With that, Rex re-equipped his helmet, and the resolve finally returned to his voice.
"And Cut..."
"Yeah?"
"Deserter or no, I'm honoured to call you a brother."