Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Souls as it is owned by FromSoftware
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'Thoughts'
"Speaking"
"YELLING"
-Time-
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"In the beginning, there was the Ancient Dragons and blah blah blah blah blah blah. Age of Fire starting. Blah blah blah. Lord Souls, whatever."
"And stuff about some guy with a burning sword, a literal hot girl witch, and some dead guy who's a spooky scary skeleton. And a dwarf."
"Yes, a dwarf. Anyways those guys went to war with the freaking dragons and yeah and one of those dragons who betrayed them was a nerd dragon."
"Morons didn't know what hit them. "And then lighting happened due to the nerd dragon providing some sweet cool lightning and then the dragons were dunzo!"
"Yeah! Lightning rules, baby!"
"Anyways, stuff about the golden age occurring. Then some sign showed up causing normal humans to turn into zombies! And curse or something. Some fire is going to go out or something and yada yada."
"Fire going out starts the zombie apocalypse, basically." "And yeah zombies now! First dragons and now it's freaking zombies! This sounds like a stupid world!"
The narrator sighed.
"Yeah...and that's the world I am going to! I shall get powerful by absorbing the Chosen guy who's supposed to be thrown into that dumb fire to make it stop from going out or something like that."
"I'll make my half brothers see that I am the strongest!" The narrator said, who's name is actually Gary Stupid.
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-Northern Asylum, Lordran-
A portal opened up at the topmost section of the Northern Asylum and Gary stepped out. He was wearing an overly flashy armor that looked more like a standard JRPG endgame armor than something from the world that he is in.
"So this is where my quest begins, huh?" Gary said as he looked at his surroundings. "Alright! Now, where is that undead?"
He then saw a fog wall.
"Maybe he's on the other side? Let's find out!" Gary said.
He then entered the fog wall.
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-10 minutes earlier-
BGM: Dark Souls OST - Taurus Demon - Extended
The Chosen Undead rolled to the right to avoid being smashed by the Greathammer of the Asylum Demon. He was facing the demon in his knight set with a broadsword and kite shield in both hands.
After being freed from his prison by Oscar of Astora, he confronted the man after running away from the Stray Demon to get better equipment. After meeting him he now resolved himself to become the Chosen One to light the First Flame, but he was having a problematic time fighting the Stray Demon.
The reason was that it was able to soak up its attacks and when he got too close it would fly up into the air and come crashing down. Causing a shockwave that damaged him. Luckily, he was able to heal himself back up through the use of the Estus Flask he was given by Oscar before he could become a hollow.
The Chosen Undead glared at his opponent who was standing in front of the exit to the Asylum. The Asylum Demon was ready to pummel him to death with his great hammer.
Unknown to both combatants, Gary managed to bypass the fog wall and was on a platform above the Asylum Demon. He ignored the demon and saw his target the Chosen Undead, this was his chance.
"TAKE THIS!" Gary said as he jumped from the platform and did the plunging attack. However, he was very far off and stabbed the Asylum demon on the head by accident, which pissed it off, which managed to allow the Chosen Undead to do hits on the demon.
To Gary's dismay as he missed his target. If he was alive to see it. As the Asylum demon grabbed him and crushed him in the palm of its hands.
YOU DIED
Then it threw Gary's corpse at the Chosen Undead who dodged it and took this opportunity to hit the Asylum Demon. With a well-placed plunging strike to the belly, it was finally defeated as the Demon let loose a howl of defeat before collapsing and turning into ash.
BGM End.
"Who was that? Anyways I better get out of here…" the Chosen Undead said as he picked up the Big Pilgrims key that will allow him to leave.
Gary respawned at the bonfire leading to where the Asylum demon was fought. He then saw the Chosen Undead at the other end exiting the Aslyum and going up to the hill.
'This is my chance once again!' Gary thought to himself as he quickly made his way on over there to kill the Chosen Undead, who was over watching the foggy mountain tops.
Gary took out a great sword with which he will try to backstab him to death. Before he could even do so a Giant Raven showed up and grabbed his target and flew him out of the Northern Undead Asylum.
Gary was left shocked at what he just witnessed. Then that shock turned into rage as he realized that the Chosen Undead is not in his sights for now.
"Darn it! He got away!" Gary said as he kicked at the ground in frustration.
However he was very much close to the edge of the cliff, and he ended up losing balance as soon as he kicked at the ground. He then screamed as he fell down to his death.
YOU DIED.
Thus begins his misadventures of Gary Stupid in the world of Lordran...and expect many, many stupid deaths to occur along the way.
A/n: So yeah here's the first chapter of a series of fics known as the Misadventures of Gary Stupid. It's basically Gary Stu...but brought down to reality as he tries (and fails) to get what he wants as the universe does not bend the knee to him at all. That's reality for you.