((I am getting back into Boku no Hero Academia again, so, before I lose all of my motivations- I want to get a fanfiction going for strictly BNHA. I don't know how regularly I will update this book, but I am hoping this will be a shorter one that I- will, you know- finish.))

When there is a lot of action... time seems to both slow down and speed up simultaneously. It's as if there is no kind of happy in-between, in these cases. There is an endless rush of adrenaline.. yet the actions we commit to- or actions we see commit just... slow down. It takes forever to process such things.

It is almost amazing... how easy it is for things to go from calm and content to absolute chaos in under 5 minutes. It was just a normal day. All of class 1-A was sitting in their homeroom- listening to their tired teacher conducting class carefully. Explaining the laws that came with hero-course work. Especially after getting their confirmation of completion and acceptance.

The darkness of the world is unparalleled.. despite how beautiful some things in life can be.

Living... loving... caring for others. Nature. Friendship. Family.

Everything just seems to be taken advantage of. Not appreciated as much as it should be. Life... most of all.

On that day in Class 1-A - no one could imagine what would happen within the time that it took to lose 5 growing children. 5 very loving- strong- and passionate children. All of which went out doing the very thing that they were training to do.

All of them dying before they got to even experience more of the world on their own.

How cruel can life be... right? How cold, and heartless can fellow humans be to each other; no matter what pain- and misconduct happens among the common populous. It is easy to put the blame on society- those who are not close to us- or those that dwell within the very same room we do.

Humans are unpredictable. No one is ever promised tomorrow. Hell- no one is ever even promised today.

If only... I would have been on my guard.

Maybe- I could have saved them.

There are 5 holes in my tired old heart. Yet- I keep persevering. I keep trying- to better prepare those around me for the real world. I don't want to let any more of my children out of my sight. Until now- I forgot just how easy it is to lose those around myself. Everyone experiences loss.

Was I maybe- a bad teacher? Was all of this... MY fault?

I can't help but blame myself... it's as if I have no choice. I am the adult. I am the one in charge. I should have taken the fall- not them. They didn't even get the chance they wanted or needed to accomplish their dreams. They didn't get to fall in love... experience life to the fullest.

"I am a bad teacher- aren't I?"

I couldn't save my friend then- I couldn't save all of my students. So... what does that make me?

"None of it... is your fault. You can't keep blaming yourself."

"Yes. I can."

"Fine.. you can... but... is that going to bring them back? Would they want you to dwell on it the way you have? To fall back into yourself? All of your other students are worried. They are just as worried as you are."

"..."

"You need to pull yourself together... you are still allowed to feel pain. There is nothing wrong with expressing grief. You need to stop holding it in. Think about your students. Some of them SAW their friends die. Right in front of them. They felt their blood. They saw life leave their eyes. Comfort them, and comfort yourself. Seek some closure."

"You would think I would be used to this by now... why does it still hurt?"

"Because you are human. You are not meant to feel nothing. This is normal for grief. How about you get some rest. Then- tomorrow- you and your class can go and visit their graves. Okay?"

"Yeah. I can do that. We haven't been there in months. Together- anyways. Thanks for the help- All Might."

"You all need it. We must persevere- but never forget those who have fallen. I just might come with you. I wish to express my grief as well."

"Alright. See you there."

"Yeah. See you there. Let's just make it a day off. All of your class needs time to calm themselves too. They are still taking it hard and it's been half a year. I am sure they will come around eventually. Maybe not soon- but eventually."

"Right. Bye."

- - - - -

What am I to do... ever since then... it has been nothing but constant confusion- and anger. None of the class are happy anymore. It's constant disarray- despite there not being any misbehavior- and further chaos since the incident.

This is worse than losing my friend from a long time ago- in a way. It's worse because I am the reason 5 families have holes in them. I am the reason 5 kids will never see adulthood. No matter how much anyone tries to convince me it is not my doing- I will not believe it.

I am not worthy of being a pro-hero. I am not worthy of being looked up to by other students in the very class that I am teaching. Yet I refuse to leave- because I don't want to lose them too. I don't want any of them to slip through my fingers- and crumple below a tombstone because of some hateful bastard that decided that they were worthy targets.

I need to get myself together... for them.

All of them.

I need to better myself so I don't make anymore mistakes. So I can smile at them while they graduate- and go out to be the best that they can be. The least I could do is smile... no matter how hard it is. I need them to know I am proud. They need to know that they were not at fault. I need to help them any way I can- even if it means being more openly supportive.

I need them to know... that I...

.

.

.

I need them to know that-

"I'm sorry.."