A/N: A completely off the wall short fic, which came to me when I was discussing with JohnnyRayChandlett about how Shaw spoilt much of season 3 for me. Then I thought about all the other romance blockers and how much better the show would have been without them. This is the result.

No betas or pre-readers were subjected to this, so it's all my fault.

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck, otherwise it would have been Charah from much, much earlier.

Accidents Happen

As he sat drinking his glass of Johnny Walker Black, Casey thought about his time with Team Bartowski, so far.

It hadn't started well when Bryce Fucking Larkin sent the Intersect to the guy whose life he'd already virtually destroyed.

There were a couple of things wrong with that part of Casey's life.

First of all, he shot Larkin, but obviously hadn't killed him. How did that happen? Must make sure he left a dead person when he walked away.

The second thing was this geek who'd received the email from Larkin, Chuck Bartowski, hadn't actually been the traitor Casey had been told and Casey's treatment of him had made working together hard at the start. This was made worse because of the CIA shirt who'd got there before him.

As it turned out, it was a good job the CIA Wildcard Enforcer, Agent Walker, stopped him from killing Bartowski. However, at the time, it was a failed kill and he'd vowed that future ones would not fail.

Working alongside Agent Walker quickly proved they were a good team. Both were loners, but worked together very successfully. They were made great with the third member of their team, Bartowski. Initially called an asset, he then proved himself time and again to the point that both Casey and Walker supported his status change and got Casey's boss, General Beckman, to agree. Of course, that took a while, a year actually.

Casey had originally called him "Moron", but that wasn't true, so recently he'd started calling him "Geek", just to needle him, as Bartowski always said "Nerd".

In that first year, General Beckman and Director Graham were told, after the salami incident, that the only way to get Bartowski to "stay true" and work at his best, was for Walker to seduce him. Casey and Walker knew that wasn't strictly true. She and Bartowski "had feelings for each other" (he hated that phrase), so it would become a cover within a cover.

Of course, that was after the salami. Walker had mentioned to Casey that the asset wasn't coping with the cover not being real and had told her that he was going to date another girl, Lou Palone. This would wreck the team and Casey had to take action. Had to.

So, Palone was the first "accident". Casey thought being "caught" in the slicing machine and turned into sliced meat quite appropriate. She never actually ended up in her deli, which was a shame. Sandwich girl in a sandwich appealed to Casey's sense of justice.

After that, he knew it was important to get the two lovebirds together, but they were just too stupid, or too insecure, to go for it at that point in time.

Next came Larkin, back from the dead, trying to insinuate his way into Walker's pants. Casey saw that she was wavering. Hell, Bartowski saw it too. This would have broken the team, so Larkin "accidentally" fell in front of a train when they had made an exchange for some paintings. That definitely was a fun "incident". Larkin hadn't fallen into the middle of the track and when his smashed body landed, it was on the rail line and got sliced in half. Bastard wasn't going to "recover" from that!

Walker did then get together with the geek and everything started to get better.

Then they intercepted what they thought was a senior Fulcrum agent. He, unfortunately, wasn't Fulcrum. He was a very attractive British spy. Walker wasn't interested in him, she was with Bartowski now, but she hadn't stopped him from kissing her. God, just like With Larkin, fucking Bartowski saw it happen! His insecurities kicked in and he ran out, missing the all important slap in the face. Shit! Why did that keep happening? So, Barker became termination number 3. Just to get Bartowski back on the team! Strange how the floor of that balcony on the 20th floor was so slippery. Shame about the car that the body hit. A write off. Casey had been glad he'd parked his Vic the other side of the building.

So, everything back on track again. For a while.

Then the supposedly "smart" Stanford guy, let's slip that he and Walker were going on a date when on a Castle call with the General; one not needed for the cover or a mission. Eagle-eye Beckman spotted this and decided to action a CIA rule, a 49B. God damned CIA rules! Beckman & Casey weren't part of that shitty organization, so WTF!

That brought in Agent Alexandra Forrest. She was the self-important shit of an agent that Casey expected from that organization! She called Walker compromised and got her replaced. And by who, oh yeah, herself! Walker had left before Casey could do anything, just upped and gone. Looking very upset. She was, thankfully, driving, so if he acted fast he thought he should be able to get her back.

Casey was pleased that Forrest apparently liked driving fast to let off steam. The geek had refused to work with her and, after a shouting match, she'd locked him in a cell and driven off. Unfortunately, the brake hose on her Merc had been "damaged"; a slow leak.

Forrest had been driving fast and cut in quickly after a truck and braked. The brakes hadn't worked, apparently, and when she tried to avoid hitting the car in front, while going over a bridge, she lost control and first hit the wall then bounced back and hit the truck which toppled over, onto her Merc.

When Casey arrived and she was pulped and the rescue team were just scrapping her out of the car. Shame. The truck had been carrying some weapons for one of the military bases and six rocket launchers were damaged in the incident.

It hadn't taken Casey long to convince Beckman that Forrest had been talking shit, just to get on the team. Beckman contacted Walker who was "resting" in a motel not far away. When he saw Walker's face, Casey thought she may have been crying her eyes out, but he never asked.

Casey and Walker had got together to discuss the asset situation, though, which led them to get his status changed. He became their Analyst. Stupid label, as he came on missions with them, but it allowed Walker to bed him "officially". Sanctioned shagging. Thank God!

Who should turn up next? Jill Harpy Roberts. She tried to get the geek away from Walker. Being such an idiot, he thought she just wanted to be friends again. Walker was losing it, so the Exterminator had to take action. As Roberts was a bio scientist, "accidentally" exposing her to a neurotoxin seem appropriate. Turned out she was working for Fulcrum anyway, so time saved. The nerd was upset, but Walker "helped" him through it.

Then the pair of them found Bartowski senior, who got the Intersect out of his son's head. Looked like the team would get disbanded, so Casey tricked Bartowski when he joined him and Walker on a Fulcrum raid; he tricked him into downloading another version of the Intersect. Job done. Team back in place.

Beckman had been furious. She wanted the geek to get trained as a spy, but he and Walker, and the geek, to be honest, refused to let that happen.

The next 6 months were a series of encounters with Fulcrum, all successful. Then a new, larger threat became apparent. The organization behind Fulcrum, the Ring. Another stupid name!

That meant that a new threat to Bartowski's confidence arrived. Daniel Fucking Shaw. Another "model" agent. He spent most of his time criticizing the nerd's abilities, to the point Bartowski was failing to function in the team, gaining more criticism. Not only that, Shaw was obviously making a play for Walker, which was further making the stupid geek worried. Why, for god's sake? She's humping you not Shaw! Anyway, Shaw had to go.

Shaw had sent Bartowski on a "mission" to collect some evidence from a safe house in Paris. Walker or Casey would have gone, but Beckman sent them on a separate mission, with Shaw.

Casey was trying to work out how to dispose of Shaw and, unfortunately, he hadn't achieved this before the geek returned. With "a friend"! Casey saw that the "friend", Hannah, was making moves on Bartowski, who was completely oblivious! Walker wasn't though! So, now two to "lose".

He took Shaw first. On the next mission Shaw went on, Casey followed him into a Ring building where Shaw "fought" with two Ring agents. Casey noticed he wasn't actually hitting them, so as he shot both Ring agents, he "accidentally" pushed Shaw down the stairwell. Such a satisfying sound, that splat.

Hannah was relatively easy. She got a call at the Buy More to fix a network problem. When she got there, it was a cabling mess. She was trying to sort out this out when she put her hand on a live wire that had "somehow" been exposed. Sizzling pork, anyone?

The lovebirds reunited and Walker "consoled" Bartowski on the loss of his friend, in the loud way they did next door.

So, here he was, relaxing over a drink which he raised to Regan.

Of course, an exterminator's job is never complete. There would be more threats, but he hoped this dumb pair would tie the knot and stop each other from worrying. Let that be soon!