Short Song-Fic inspired by Rest in Peace from Yellow Card.

It was the best that you could be for me,

I think we were lucky just to stay alive.

Even when you had only fire to breathe,

I know you were only trying to make it right.

Kate sat alone on the bank, the city lights danced in the distance.

An icy breeze tugged at her hair, she hugged her coat tighter and nestled her face into her thick scarf.

Salty rivers streamed down her pale cheeks, even when alone, she still felt the need to hide her tears.

She couldn't face the Pub, the celebrations, the questions. The case had been closed, 'H' identified and was to be sentenced for conspiracy to murder, amongst many other charges.

Nearly 10 years of AC12, several undercover operations and now their biggest case was over.

It had cost her, her marriage, her relationship with her son and almost her life.

And all she felt was empty.

Hollow, soul shattered and scattered into the wind.

Her heart had been torn out, leaving nothing but dark space.

Underneath the shell of Kate Flemming, there was nothing.

She was nothing without Jo.

Too late had she realised how she truly felt. She hadn't been pretending. Maybe at first, but she quickly found herself inexplicably drawn to the older woman. Chestnut brown hair that sat neatly on her shoulders, those brilliant but pained eyes.

She knew she should be thankful that they were both safe, but safe wasn't enough if they were apart.

You don't know what you've got until it's gone.

She understood now, she understood everything. Why Jo had done the things she'd done. How hard she'd tried to get away from it all, to make it right. I forgive you she wanted to scream. Once the anger faded, she understood everything.

You don't choose your family, but you also aren't your family. Jo was proof of that. Jo had saved her, by admitting to shooting Ryan she'd ensured Kate couldn't be charged.

Change everything I've ever known.

Try once again to let you go.

Jo had changed everything.

Kate had never considered she could feel such a way about another person like she felt for Jo. It had never crossed her mind that she could love someone like she loved Jo. A love so strong it hurt, each beat of her heart a painful reminder of what she'd lost.

She couldn't let her go.

Every time she closed her eyes, she'd see her face. The tears that streamed down her cheeks during her final interview.

The goodbye she never said.

Kate started at MIT and her whole world changed.

Jo, a tornado that tore through all she thought she knew, stirred up feelings she didn't know she had.

The way Jo smiled after she made a stupid joke, lighting up her whole face. Letting her mask slip for just a moment, Kate glimpsed the vulnerability she hid with her frosty exterior.

No those men weren't my type

Jo, you were my type and I never told you.

Please, I wasn't pretending.

You changed everything.

Every gentle touch was electric, as if every cell in her body had suddenly sparked into life.

Evenings in the bar, sharing a bottle of wine.

I could have spent all night looking at you.

Losing myself in your beauty.

How did I not realise?

Nothing had ever felt so real.

You were my reason for being.

If you could go back now, would you say it differently,

If there was no one there, would you open up for me?

If this was the last time that we would ever speak,

Could we forgive somehow, could we let it rest in peace?

Kate wished she'd told her.

Those three words that could have changed everything.

She cursed herself for not having the courage to follow her heart. For ignoring the feelings and desire that burnt within her.

Maybe things could have been different.

If she'd had more time, time to build a relationship, build trust.

To admit her feelings,

To open her heart.

To forgive and start again. Together. Together against the world.

Stories are lost somewhere behind your eyes,

You are a dying breed, you stand alone.

I couldn't get through no matter how hard I tried,

You tore me apart but I still love you so.

Years of dark secrets kept hidden.

Such trauma hidden in her past.

You can share it all with me, she wanted to say.

I won't judge, I'll just listen and be there.

There was such torment in those beautiful eyes.

So alone, but you need not be.

I'd give anything for you, I'd take all the pain as my own for you.

I'd break down those walls, brick by brick if needed.

I'd hold you for eternity, bring peace and comfort.

But the walls wouldn't break.

I tried so hard, but you still pushed me away.

You still stayed cold and distant, I know now why.

You did it to protect me. Because you still cared, you always cared.

And I care too, I always will.

Because I fucking love you Jo. I love you more than I thought I could ever love, so much it hurts.

"I love you Jo!" Kate screamed into the night, tears stained silver in the moonlight.

But it wasn't enough.