A/N: So. This is my first multi-chapter story - something I never thought I'd write. I'm very very excited about this, and I really hope you like it!
The fic is all done and I'll be updating weekly, so there will be no risk of long hiatuses or it being forgotten. I feel like I should say right away that this is not a super dynamic, plot-heavy story, so if that's your preferred style this might not end up being your favorite fic, but I do hope you'll stick around anyway :)
Lastly, I could not have done this without Kelly and her endless support, patience, availability and excitement. Thank you, thank you, thank you 3
Title and foreword from "When We Were Young", by Adele.
My God, this reminds me
Of when we were young
Walking into Louis' living room and seeing Harvey's face again, Donna forgets how to breathe.
He looks just like he always did, the moles over his left brow, the crinkles around his eyes, the sharp jaw. But he also looks different; there's a few extra lines on his forehead, a hint of silver in his hair, a hint of a beard, a very faint tan.
She supposes he must find the same little changes in her appearance as he eyes her, though she probably wouldn't be able to tell which changes those would be. She's learned that growing old is a strange process; you'll wake up every day for decades, look yourself in the mirror and think you look exactly the same, bar maybe deeper bags under your eyes or an extra pound here or there. And then suddenly you'll realize you've gained weight, wrinkles, experience and regrets at a rate that feels far too quick for everything you still want to do. And your new self will look starkly different against who you used to be. Probably worse, more tired, mournful for everything you didn't get to live.
It's been five years, six months and twelve days since she last saw him. She gave up on being embarrassed about knowing the exact date they last met some good three years ago. She tried to let go of it, to force herself not to pay it any mind in hopes it would fade away, but it shone bright and aggressive like a neon sign in the dark, stuck to her like a scrap of toilet paper clinging to the sole of a shoe. She tried and tried to get away but she couldn't, the date coming to her unbidden, its anniversary being unwittingly observed every year, and eventually she just accepted that she would forever know the day Harvey walked out of her life, seemingly forever.
It's not entirely surprising that she's meeting him again. Actually, it's not surprising at all; Louis told her he'd be here. Half of the purpose of this gathering was to welcome him back. And yet, her brain had weirdly refused to believe it until this very second. She'd somehow convinced herself he wouldn't show, or that he'd give up on coming back and stay in Chicago - one night she even dreamed the gathering itself wasn't real, just an elaborate, mean prank pulled on her.
Improbably, he's here. In flesh and blood, in all his glory, all six feet of him. He stands up from the couch at the same time as she sees Louis scurrying away to the kitchen out of the corner of her eye, finding the tact to leave them to their moment possibly for the first time in his life.
She spent this whole time wondering what she'd say to him if they ever met in person again. She concocted apologies, listed quips, spun declarations. She thought of cadence and timbre and vocabulary. She wrote drafts and improvised in front of the mirror. There is no good way to greet a person who used to be your best friend, the man who gave up everything for you. Everything she came up with felt inadequate, like it sold them short because the enormity of them and the mess they became cannot be contained in words.
Still, he's here now, really in front of her, after five years, six months and twelve days. Her heart skips a beat and then doubles down on itself, pumps growing in speed and intensity until her chest feels like a door being banged on, ready to burst open. Her palms are sweaty and her eyes haven't blinked since they first spotted him and she has no idea what to say.
"Hey," he starts, and it's tentative, delicate, nothing like they used to be, and still the sound of his voice sends goosebumps all over her skin and makes her body tingle, the low register hitting like sound therapy, soothing and electrifying at once.
"Hey," is what she says back.