Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars.
"Say, what do we have here, Chewie?"
Han Solo stood on the sandy grounds of Tatooine which his faithful furry companion, Chewbecca, by his side. The young smuggler was staring at a grave in front of him. He was most surprised to discover that laid to rest here was a certain someone with whom he had history. He read over the words on the tombstone, eyebrows raising over what they said:
HERE LIES GREEDO
17 BBY - 0 BBY
BLASTED BY THE NORTORIOUS SCOUNDREL KNOWN AS
HAN SOLO
A LEGENDARY BOUNTY HUNTER
FOREVER REMEMBERED IN THE BLACK HEARTS OF
ALL CRIMINALS ACROSS THE GALAXY
CURSE YOU, SOLO!
"Rawr!" Chewbecca commented.
"You're right, buddy!" Han replied to his wookie companion. "What's been written here is nothing but a load of garbage! I can't let my old buddy, Greedio, lie here underneath a load of lies!"
Han began to work away at the tombstone. He was altering the message to say something more truthful. To leave what he had found written at Greedo's grave wouldn't do at all.
It didn't take Han long to change the message. He stood back to observe what the gravestone now read. A smile crossed the smuggler's face, filled with all his usual smugness.
"There! That's much better - and more truthful! C'mon, Chewie, let's get back to the ship!"
With that, the cocky young scoundrel began to lead his fury friend in the direction of where they had docked the Millennium Falcon. They left behind the grave of Greedo, the tombstone now displaying a more historically accurate message:
HERE LIES GREEDO
17 BBY - 0 BBY
SHOT IN SELF-DEFENSE BY THE HARDCORE HERO KNOWN AS
HAN SOLO
A SLEAZY SLIMEBALL
HATED BY EVERYBODY, MISSED BY NONE
THREE CHEERS FOR SOLO!
P.S.
JUST FOR THE RECORD SO THAT WE'RE ABSELOUTLY CLEAR,
HAN SHOT FIRST!
The end.