All things considered, Sirius Black was a clever bloke. At the tender age of 13 he'd managed to become an animagi. Why? Because one of his best mates was a werewolf and Sirius couldn't keep him company as human, hence the solution to learn how to turn into a big black dog at will. When Sirius turned 14 he was able to cast a full corporeal patronus; also a big black dog. At 15 Sirius succeeded in helping one of his other best mates to become an animagi, which, ironically, turned out to actually be harder than doing it himself. When he was 16 he and his mates finally succeeded in creating an extremely integrated and advanced magical map which not only showed every bit of Hogwarts, but also all its inhabitants' location at any given time. And just two years ago, when he was 18, he'd graduated Hogwarts with an O in all his five N.E.W.T classes.
Yes, Sirius Black was a goddamn genius, even on a bad day.
So why the bloody hell couldn't he mend his ruddy motorbike?
Four days! Four sodding days of carefully taking apart, inspecting, labeling, cleaning, mending and putting it back exactly where he'd found it, but still, no luck. It had taken him three days to come to the conclusion that the problem must have hailed from the exhaust manifold, but even after special care and mending the bike still wouldn't run right and Sirius wasn't having it anymore. He vented his frustration by giving the back tire of his 64 Triumph a hard kick, which only resulted in him losing his balance when the bike refused to move. As he took a staggering step backwards to regain his balance he knocked over the box he'd, oh so carefully, placed all the bike's nuts and bolts in, which scattered across the driveway.
"Bollocks."
For a moment he just stood there, seriously contemplating using magic to summon the million small pieces of metal laying all over the ground, but he decided against it.
It wasn't that he couldn't. No, if he'd only used magic there probably wouldn't even be a problem with the exhaust manifold to begin with, but that wasn't in the spirit of things. See, this bike represented something; something very important to Sirius. Something so important that it outweighed using magic to make his life easier. This bike represented that he was not his family. No one in the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black would be caught dead with something as Muggle as a motorbike. And even less so caught tinkering with it without magic. The bike represented that even though his decisions had gotten him disowned by his family he was still his own person, free to live his own life and be the master of his own destiny.
Sirius had bought his bike and a small cottage in the middle of a forest as soon as he'd graduated Hogwarts with money his uncle Alphard had left him, and those were probably his two wisest investments yet. Because they meant he was free.
As Sirius was contemplating this, on his hands and knees, searching his driveway for the nuts and bolts a pair of feet walked into view. Looking up he saw the feets owner's wide grin. One of his best mates, Remus Lupin, was looking down at him, hands shoved in his pockets, and smiling.
"Lose something?"
"Remus!" Nuts and bolts forgotten, Sirius stood up and embraced his friend. "Merlin, it's been too long! How are you, mate? What's going on?"
"Yeah, it's been a while. What has it been? Five weeks? " Remus teased when Sirius finally released him from the hug. "I'm fine, though. How are you? Taking the bike out for spring cleaning?"
"Yeah, it's been making some very ill boding noises so I've been trying to mend it." Sirius glared angrily at the bike, as if the bike had personally insulted him. "I've narrowed it down but still haven't solved it."
"Oh, what's the problem, then?" Remus asked, giving the bike a quizzical look.
"The exhaust manifold, I think," Sirius sighed.
"Mind if I have a look?" Before Sirius had answered, Remus was hunched over the bike, inspecting it.
Sirius shrugged,
"Sure."
After all, Remus's mother was a Muggle and Sirius knew Remus had had various Muggle jobs, on account that his furry little problem, as his case of lycanthropy was referred to amongst the friends, made it hard for him to keep a job in the wizarding world, so Sirius failed to see how Remus having a go at the bike could make the situation worse. The two mates then spent a few minutes poking and inspecting the bike together.
"So, what kind of ill boding sound are we talking about here?" Remus asked as he handed Sirius a spanner. "Like a ka-tink ka-tink or more like a ffsss ffsss?"
Sirius's hand gripped the spanner, his hand closing around Remus's,
"Eh, what? What are you talking about?"
Remus gave him a lopsided grin,
"Well, if it goes ka-tink ka-tink it indicates a mechanical problem, doesn't it? Like the engine being botched or something. If it's more of a ffsss ffsss sound then you probably have a leak, you know?"
Sirius contemplated this for a moment,
"Well, then I'd say it's like a ffsss ffsss psssh."
"So a leak, then, following my logic of reasoning." Remus grinned. "Did you check the gasket?"
To Sirius's surprise and delight Remus's logical reasoning and deduction skills turned out to be right, and an hour later they were sitting in the kitchen, having tea and congratulating themselves on being savvy enough to have fixed the motorcycle.
"You know, some would argue that a simple Reparo would've done the job much quicker, though," Remus said, peering at his friend over his tea cup.
"Yeah, but that's not very Muggle, is it? And then how would the bike fulfill its purpose of pissing off my parents? Hmm?" Sirius tapped his temple, giving Remus a meaningful look.
"But you've modified it so that it can fly; that's not very Muggle," Remus said.
At this, Sirius just laughed,
"Yeah, but being full of contradictions is what makes me interesting, wouldn't you say, Moony."
His friend just rolled his eyes,
"I wouldn't say you exactly need to add things to be an enigma. You seem to have got that covered even if you're not making an effort."
"Yeah, you're probably right, as per usual," Sirius grinned. "But what brings you here, anyway? Surely it wasn't because your wolf senses tingled and told you a pack member needed your mechanical expertise?"
For a split second a distraught look flickered over Remus's face and the playful banter they'd just shared was gone in an instant.
"Um, well, it actually is about the tingling wolf senses," he said quietly, his eyes falling down on the table. "There's a big one coming up."
Sirius watched his friend and thought; this isn't fair. It isn't fair that he hates it this much when I always found it to be the highlight of the month.
"Yeah," he just said instead. "It's tomorrow. It's a blood moon this time, right?"
Remus looked up, probably surprised at Sirius's detailed knowledge about this specific moon. Remus probably thought his friends' interest in the lunar cycle had stopped once they graduated Hogwarts and didn't spend their full moons with a werewolf on a regular basis. But truth be told Sirius still kept an extra eye on his lunar charts and still marked his calendar carefully. Why? Because he missed it. And every month it gave him a reason to reminisce over the full moon escapades him and his friends had had at school. And every month he found himself wondering how Remus was. How he was coping with that particular moon. Hoping he was okay.
"Yes," Remus sighed. "A blood moon is worth like three regular ones." He rubbed his temples. "It only happens, like, once in a decade, so I guess there's always that. But it's the worst."
Since his friend didn't elaborate on what part of the transformation was the worst, Sirius was left guessing it was either the excruciating pain, the loss of control or the fatigue that followed, all of them tri-folding. But an educated guess would be it was a combination of all of the above.
"So, what do you need?" he asked, putting down his tea cup, looking at Remus. "What do you want me to do for you?"
Remus looked up, his face clearly betraying his words;
"No, it's not like that. I didn't come here to ask anything of you."
Stupid, noble Remus; still thinking his condition was an inconvinience on his friends.
"Oh, come off it!" Sirius shot out, now losing patience. "Of course you came here for something. Just tell me, I'm your mate, for Merlin's sake! Don't be shy! Do you need wolfsbane?"
Remus shook his head.
"No, that's not the problem," he said.
It's too expensive, I'm not comfortable asking you for that, Sirius translated in his head.
"You need Patfoot to keep you company? So you don't have to worry about doing things you'll regret?" he offered.
Remus shifted uncomfortably,
"No, I'm sure I'll manage."
I could never ask that of my friends, I don't want to be a burden, Sirius translated.
Sirius leaned forward, giving his mate a grave look,
"Do you need me to rub ointment on hard-to-reach-places? If that's the case, you can ask me, you know. I know how rough a regular full moon is on your body."
"What? NO!" Remus's face took on a tomato-shade. "No, Sirius, you don't have to rub ointment on hard-to-reach-places."
Hmm, Sirius had a harder time deciphering what that no really meant. Back at school Remus had usually been quite grateful when Sirius had offered similar services, and it literally only took a hot minute.
"Okay… Easy-to-reach-places, then?" he tried. "Remus, I swear, I won't think it's weird. You're uncomfortable and in pain, I get it."
Remus shook his head,
"Would you stop guessing, please?"
"Fine, but just tell me what you need," Sirius said. "I know you hate it, but you know how much I love the full moon, and to spend it with you. It was among the best times I had at Hogwarts. Whatever you need from me, you've got it. It's not a burden, honest."
"Alright, well, if it isn't too much to ask -"
"It's not."
"- I was wondering if I could crash at your place until it wanes?" Remus finished. "I was thinking it might be alright since you've got a ridiculously large forest behind your house and no humans living within a 20 mile radius. I mean, we could put all sorts of protective spells around the house, maybe even ones that keep me tethered. But even if I'd get out there's still not much of a chance of me running into someone I could hurt. But only if it's alright. I know it's a lot to ask, but I'd only ever consider being here if I knew you'd be safe."
"Oh, Moony." Sirius had a hard time matching Remus's glum and pained expression when he considered this to be the best suggestion he'd heard in months. "Of course you're staying here! Like you even had to ask. But if you think even for a second that I'd let you have a blood moon's worth of full moon havoc to yourself, then you'd better think again. Of course I'm gonna stay here with you."
"But you'd have to -"
"- Be Padfoot, I know," Sirius grinned. "When has that ever been a problem? You know I'm a delightful dog. So delightful, in fact, that suggestions have been made that I should make the change permanent."
At this, Remus smiled for the first time in a while,
"Thank you, Sirius. Really."
The sincerity of that thank you and the relief it carried wasn't lost on Sirius. He knew it wasn't just because he had agreed to help Remus; it was more due to the fact that Sirius seemed to look forward to it. And looking forward to it he was. So much so that a plan had started concocting in his brain which he was sure Remus wasn't ready to hear just yet.
"Don't mention it." Sirius rose and cleared away their tea cups. "Well, we should really go out and get some supplies, don't you think? If we're gonna have a full moon lock down, I mean. We'll still need to eat, right? Come on, let's take the bike."
...
Said and done, a couple of hours later Sirius and Remus had stocked up on food that would probably last the two of them a fortnight and Sirius was now trying to convince Remus that they should make a final stop at the apothecary in Diagon Alley.
"Are you gonna try to convince me to get wolfsbane?" Remus hissed in a low voice. "I told you, it's fine. And I don't wanna buy it. Not here. People… talk… "
"Well, for the record, I do in fact think we should get some wolfsbane." Sirius said, not bothering to lower his voice. "Did you know it can be used as an antidote for the Draught of Living Death? Hmm? Quite practical to have at hand these days with dark wizards running amok and killing people all over the place, just saying."
Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius, but Sirius could still tell Remus somewhat appreciated this futile attempt at normalising buying wolfsbane.
"But that's not why I want to visit the apothecary," Sirius continued. "I still think that ointment is a necessity."
"Why are you on about the ointment?" Remus asked. "I told you, you don't have to rub it on me."
At this Sirius made a halt and turned to face Remus. This time he did lower his voice,
"I'm still on about it because I know how uncomfortable you'll be, especially if you're gonna refuse to let me buy you wolfsbane. It's a blood moon, Remus. And I don't want you laying in bed writhing in pain with a tri folded intensity because that'll pain me as well. So, if you're not gonna let me buy you wolfsbane, then at least let me buy you the ointment. For my own piece of mind, if nothing else."
Remus let out a heavy sigh,
"I understand where you're coming from and I appreciate the sentiment, I really do. But this is exactly why I didn't want to ask you in the first place; you really don't have to buy these things for me." He then looked away, mumbling, "It's not fair to you, those things are really expensive."
Ah, Sirius thought, so we finally hit the proverbial nerve.
"Remus," Sirius said, swinging his arm around his mate's shoulder as he steered them towards the apothecary, "You've been working an obscene amount of jobs trying to make an honest living and make ends meet, but our backwards and prejudice society has its nose too far up in its own arse to give you the opportunities you deserve. Me, on the other hand, have never done an honest day's work in my life, but I've still got a fortune I'm not gonna be able to spend in a lifetime because I happened to have a rich uncle who took pity on his run-away-nephew. That's bloody cocked up, but here we are. And if I can't spend my undeserving fortune to make a night with my best mates the best it can be, then what should I spend it on? Women, wine and song?"
Remus frowned at Sirius,
"I know you're only making an effort to be charming to make me feel better about this whole thing." A smile then spread across his face. "I hate to say it, but it's working. Alright, let's go to the apothecary."
"So, is that a yes on the wolfsbane as well, then?" Sirius grinned, but Remus only shook his head, knowing he'd already lost that battle.
…
That night Sirius cooked them shepherd's pie for dinner and the two of them had a lovely time preparing and eating it, all together with a bottle of wine that Sirius found on a dusty shelf at the back of his food cellar. Sirius wasn't really a wine-person, but more of a beer-person, but as he knew Remus did enjoy a nice glass of red every once in a while he reckoned it wouldn't kill him to drink some as well. Filled up on food and wine it was well into the evening when the two of them plopped down on the sofa in the sitting room.
"Yeah, this beats women, wine and song any day of the week," Sirius stated, swinging his feet up on the coffee table. "Hanging out with your mate, eating good food…"
"Drinking wine?" Remus mused, swinging his feet up on the table next to Sirius's.
"Fair enough, I'll admit the wine part is alright," Sirius admitted, grinning.
"And when you drink some that has been aged properly and not in the poor conditions of your food cellar you'll find it even nicer," Remus said, sniffing his glas. "I honestly think this is a little off. How old is it?"
"I've got no clue. It came with the house," Sirius said, taking a sip from his own glass.
"Is that right?" Remus gave his glass a sceptical look before putting it down on the coffee table.
It couldn't be that bad, Sirius reasoned, as they'd almost finished the whole bottle already and this was the first Remus had mentioned about it being off.
"Yeah, no, it's probably fine, though," Remus said, more to himself than to Sirius. "Hey, did I remember to thank you earlier?"
"For the wine?" Sirius asked, emptying his glass and putting it down. "Don't worry about it. It wouldn't have been drunk if you hadn't come."
"No, I meant for, well, everything," Remus clarified. "Letting me stay here, the food, the ointment, the wolfsbane, the… The everything."
Sirius sighed,
"Like I said, it's really not a sacrifice on my part, you know. I really am happy to do it. Would you stop thinking I'm not? That would be great, thanks."
One side of Remus's lips curved into a smile,
"I know, I'm just trying to say thank you. It's just that I don't take what you're doing for me for granted."
"Oi, I thought we had an understanding! I'm not having any of that, Moony," Sirius said, poking Remus's foot with his own. "I get it, you won't be my beast of burden. Your back is broad, but it's a-hurtin'."
Remus rolled his eyes.
"Really, Padfoot? Is all you want is for me to make love to you?" he deadpanned.
Even though Remus had just given the most obvious and expected retort to what Sirius had just said, Sirius still felt his cheeks burn unexpectedly and couldn't think of a witty remark to save his life. So he just stared at Remus, like he'd just made Sirius the most insane offer ever made. Except he hadn't. What Remus had just said sounded so perfectly sane that Sirius, in fact, didn't know how to respond. But the reason it sounded so sane was because that was what followed, right? In the lyrics. Not because Sirius actually wanted to say yes, right?
Say something! A voice at the back of Sirius's head shouted. If you don't you'll make it weird, but as long as you just say something you can save this. You can literally say whatever; anything would do! Ask him if you're hard enough, rough enough or rich enough! I swear, it won't be as weird as you just staring at him, dumbfounded. You're starting to scare him!
"Eeerr," was all Sirius managed to produce, arguably looking extremely unintelligent as his mouth opened and closed without producing coherent sounds.
The voice at the back of Sirius's head made a facepalm. You're on your own, kiddo.
His reaction had spurred one in Remus as well; his cheeks turning red and eyes flickering nervously, looking mortified that he'd misread the situation gravely.
"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean- I just, just thought…" Remus stammered, his blush spreading to his ears. "I mean, that was what you were doing, right? Referencing Rolling Stones?"
Remus's rising stress level rebooted Sirius's cognitive ability, at least somewhat.
"Yeah, of course," Sirius said, running a hand through his hair. "I was just, um, just thinking about the next line. But I completely spaced."
This seemed to calm Remus, as he let out a relieved breath.
"Oh, yeah, of course. Naturally."
The whole situation made Sirius feel a strong need for something, anything, to drink, so he refilled his own glass and then poured the rest of the bottle in Remus's.
"Oh, thanks," Remus said, taking a larger gulp than what would have been expected considering that not only three minutes ago he'd accused the wine of being off.
Sirius drank as well and a long silence filled the room.
"So, um, what does come next?" Sirius finally asked. "In the song. I really can't remember."
"Um, I've walked for miles, my feet are hurting, I think," Remus mumbled.
"Right, right. All I want is for you to make love to me," Sirius said, and when Remus's head turned sharply towards him he quickly added; "It comes back, doesn't it? That line. It comes back again."
"Yes, it does, yeah." Remus gave him a sideway glance. "Am I hard enough?"
For a split second Sirius thought he might have a heart failure from that question, but soon enough his brain understood what Remus was doing, and he grinned,
"Am I rough enough?"
Remus laughed,
"Am I rich enough?"
"I'm not too blind to see," they both said in unison before they burst out laughing and the awkwardness of the situation magically disappeared.
"That is a bloody good song," Sirius said once they'd finally had stopped laughing.
They sat quiet for a moment after that, but this time it was a rather comfortable one and Sirius contemplated on how happy he was that he could make Remus laugh, even though Sirius knew the full moon was weighing heavily at the back of Remus's mind even this very instant. Speaking of which…
"You know, I never really asked you before," Sirius began and Remus turned his attention towards him. "What's it like to transform when you've taken wolfsbane? You never did at school, but you've had it before, right?"
"Oh, well, yeah, I've taken it before. Dumbledore had Slughorn brew me some for a mission I did for the Order last year so I could report back properly." Remus said, taking the wineglass again. "In an essence wolfsbane makes me still me, I get to keep my mind even during my transformation, which you know I don't otherwise."
"Oh, yeah, I'm aware," Sirius grinned.
"And it hurts a lot less when the bones reform. It's more of a dull, throbbing pain instead of a searing one," Remus continued. "But it also makes me very tired, like it's supposed to. The point of wolfsbane is to give the drinker a more normal life, and of course that includes sleeping through the night."
"Instead of passing out at sunrise potentially miles away from home?" Sirius asked.
"Something like that, yeah," Remus agreed with a sigh, but then a small smile crept up in the corner of his mouth. "The fact that the wolfsbane makes you so sleepy actually caused me some problems last year when I went on that mission."
"Really? How?" Sirius asked. Sirius knew Remus had been fraternizing with a few packs on Dumbledore's orders, but Remus hadn't really wanted to talk about details before.
"Well, I was scouting a place Dumbledore suspected belonged to one of Greyback's packs. I was still in the recon-stage and I had strict orders from Dumbledore not to approach them even if it turned out to be the pack we suspected. So, my job was just to keep a lookout, right? Just observe and report back, and then we'd make a plan for infiltration, and that's why I took the wolfsbane. I needed to be able to tell Dumbledore what was happening in that camp during the full moon to make an adequate risk assessment." Remus said.
Hearing Remus talk like this made Sirius's insides twist and tighten uncomfortably, and he didn't like it one bit to be perfectly honest. That Remus was a valuable member of the Order, Sirius knew and agreed whole-heartedly with. But he really didn't care for the fact that Remus was sent off on missions alone. The jobs Sirius had done for the Order had all been with someone else, usually with James and that had a familiar comfort to it. Like it was an elaborate prank they were pulling off. On their moon strolls during school it had always been the four of them, and that meant safety. But now Remus was alone, and facing danger. Without backup. Without the Marauders. Without him.
Remus hadn't seemed to notice that Sirius were having some form of serious thoughts and continued with his story,
"So, I've been staking the place out for several days, and the full moon finally comes. Now, in the days leading up to that point I've gathered that they are planning for something to happen that night, and I just know it's going to be something important. I take the wolfsbane and wait for the moon to rise. And when the moon finally rises the whole camp transforms, I'm talking like 20 - 30 werewolves starting to run towards the forest where I'm hiding."
"Shit, what did you do?" Sirius asked, his eyes wide as he hung on to every word Remus spoke.
"I panicked, obviously," Remus chuckled. "So I grab my wand and climb a tree. And I honestly think I just got lucky that they didn't pick up on my scent, because it must have been all over the forest as I'd spent days there. But I think they were on a mission of some sort, like they had a plan they didn't want to stray from. But anyway, so now I'm sitting in the top of a tree, and I've still got a fairly decent vantage point where I can still see the camp, so I decide to wait for them to return. Only, it takes them hours to return. And sitting in a tree staring at an empty camp with no movement is, well, tidius as fuck. So I fell asleep."
"What?" This was not what Sirius had expected to hear from the most responsible Marauder, and he couldn't help but to let out a laugh. "You fell asleep on the job? What happened, Prefect Moony?"
Remus gave him a smirk,
"Well, I guess what happened was that Prefect Moony was used to more action from hanging out with the Sergeant of Mischief, Padfoot, too much. But yeah, I fell asleep. When I woke up the next morning they had burned the camp and were gone; I'd missed the whole action and had no idea what had happened. I was just left stark naked in the tree since my clothes had toren the night before when I transformed. Dumbledore was not happy when I came to report back, I'll tell you that much."
Safe to say Sirius had no problem picturing Dumbledore's face when Remus had explained this to him, and it made Sirius grin. But at the back of his mind he was also glad to hear that this was how it had gone down. Remus hadn't interacted with any vicious werewolves on Voldemort's side. He hadn't been caught. He hadn't been hurt.
"Well, what I take away from this story is that you should bring the Sergeant of Mischief with you to keep you awake, should you ever happen to be assigned similar missions in the future. Might save your life. Or at least your reputation in the Order for being the bloke who always falls asleep on a mission," Sirius said, actually being more sincere than he sounded.
"I'll keep that in mind for next time. But you know that Dumbledore still doesn't know about Padfoot so you'd have to be sneaky about coming," Remus said and stretched his arms and shoulders. "But now I think I should be getting to bed, or I'll earn a reputation of being the mate who falls asleep in his wine glass."
"Yeah, sure. Do you wanna take the sofa or spoon me upstairs?" Sirius said, standing up, picking up their now empty wine glasses.
Strictly speaking, two Marauders sharing a bed wasn't exactly unheard of, as it had in fact happened on numerous occasions before for various reasons, usually either as a result of late night plotting, passing out in the Shrieking Shack after a moon stroll or simply because the situation called for it for other reasons, so that was why Sirius was stumped by the sudden nervous fluttering he felt in his stomach when he waited for Remus to answer.
"I mean, either is fine by me. If you don't mind and don't wanna make up the sofa I'll spoon with you, Padfoot." Remus said, standing up as well. "But I do have one condition, though."
"Which is?" Sirius asked, unsure if he was supposed to be intrigued or disturbed by the fact that this had excited him somewhat.
"That I get to be the little spoon," Remus grinned.
"No, that's not fair!" Sirius protested, frowning. "The little spoon is the best spoon!"
"I know," Remus's grin spread even wider. "Deal?"
"Oh, I'll make you a deal, alright," Sirius said, smirking as he handed Remus the wine glasses he was still holding. "First one in bed gets to be the little spoon," he said, barely finishing the sentence before darting up the stairs, leaving a perplexed Remus holding the wine glasses still standing in the sitting room.
"Oi, you bloody wanker, that's cheating!" Remus yelled, setting off after Sirius.
…
Sirius had been the first one in bed the night before and had thus won the right as the position of the little spoon fair and square. But somehow during the night the tables had turned and when Sirius woke up the next morning he did so with his arms curled around Remus and his nose buried in Remus's light brown locks. As Sirius blinked the sleep out of his eyes he could only come to the conclusion that Remus must have somehow cheated.
But then again, Sirius thought, this isn't really so bad either, and he allowed himself to tighten his grip around Remus and pull him flush against his front and bury his nose even further in Remus's hair. Remus smelled like the forest after rain; like fresh moss and pine, mixed with parchment and ink. Admittedly, this sounded like an odd combination of smells, but to Sirius it was a familiar smell and a smell he associated with happiness.
Sirius felt Remus stirring, beginning to wake up, in his arms, but he made no effort to release his grip just yet. He felt Remus stretching his body, not unlike how a canine waking up would, and the result was Remus arching his back further against Sirius as he nestled his head further into the pillow.
"Stop that," Sirius muttered, his voice hoarse with sleep. "Your hair tickles my nose."
A small laugh escaped Remus.
"Right, sorry. I'll stay still." Although Sirius couldn't see Remus's face, he heard the grin.
"You better," Sirius said into Remus's neck. "How did you manage to become the little spoon, anyway? You cheated, didn't you? You sneaky sod."
"Oh, no, I did no such thing. You did this, I'll have you know," Remus said, calmly. "You're a bloody windmill when you sleep, did you know? After having been woken up several times by various limbs of yours in my face I retreated to the other side of the bed. But you followed shortly after. You're a terrible little spoon, but you do make a decent big one."
"I am, too, a decent little spoon," Sirius snorted. "You just need to be a more assertive big spoon."
"What would you have me do then?" Remus asked, amused. "Hold you down and pin you into the mattress when you start waving your arms and legs?"
Now, there was a picture Sirius was sure he definitely shouldn't find as entertaining as he did. But instead of dwelling on what sort of spanners that might possibly throw into the works he decided to lean into it and indulge his curiosity, to see where it might take him. He let a smirk form over his lips against Remus's neck,
"Yeah, that's exactly what you should do."
A shiver ran down Remus's body, so strong Sirius could clearly feel it, but when Remus spoke his voice was still even and calm,
"Alright, thank you for that note, Sirius. I'll do my best to oblige next time."
The potential that promise might hold had both Sirius's mind and body go haywire and images of various indecent nature kept appearing before his inner eye and triggered some, um, physical responses he had no control over either. This was also the point where Sirius started panicking slightly. Not because of the mental images or the physical response itself; no, that in itself was fine and all as the concept of a bloke making him hot and bothered wasn't really news to Sirius. What was news to him, however, was the fact that it was Remus. Remus, one of his best mates since he was 11. Remus, who he'd shared both happiness and sadness with and who'd always made the happiness more happy and the sadness less sad. Remus, who he'd always confided anything and everything in without hesitation and who in turn trusted Sirius with his most well-guarded secret. How much of that did this new development have the potential to change? To that, Sirius didn't have an answer, but he was sharp enough to realise that this was an unexplored territory in which he had to tread carefully not to cock it up, even though that concept seemed foreign to him.
"Um, Sirius?" The sound of Remus's hesitant voice brought Sirius out of his thoughts.
"Huh?"
"Are you alright?" Remus turned his head, trying to look at Sirius.
"Oh, yeah, sure." At this point Sirius realised he was still pressed up rather closely against Remus and that that position was probably rather revealing, so he quickly turned to lay on his back. "I'm fine."
Yeah, treading carefully really isn't your strong suit, kiddo, the voice at the back of Sirius's head deadpanned.
Remus also turned to lay on his back, but he didn't look at Sirius but up at the ceiling instead,
"Are you sure? You went really quiet just then and… -"
"Yeah, no, I'm really fine. Sorry." He wasn't really sure what he apologised for, but it seemed fitting for some reason. "I didn't mean to… " he paused, trying to find a suitable word. " … to make it weird."
"No, it's alright. No need to give it a second thought." Sirius heard a slight quiver in Remus's voice that really didn't seem to resonate with the carefree words Remus had just spoken.
"Right," Sirius agreed anyway. "Breakfast?" he offered, hoping a change of subject would help the situation.
"Yeah, I could eat," Remus said. "What've you got?"
"Is tea and toast alright?" Sirius tried looking over at Remus and meeting his eyes, but to his disappointment Remus was still looking up at the ceiling. "Or I could make us an omelette. Or both, if you'd like."
"Both sounds good," Remus said, his tone was less tense now but he was still looking stubbornly up at the ceiling instead of at Sirius.
"Right. Both it is then," Sirius said, but made no effort to leave the bed.
Neither did Remus, though. The reason why Sirius had no desire to stand up at the moment was because he was willing himself to redirect his blood flow so his erection wouldn't be as noticeable when he eventually did have to remove the protective covers, but as of Remus's reason for not getting up, Sirius had no clue. It was first after several long moments of picturing finding Snivellus's hair in his food Sirius felt it safe to stand up and get dressed.
…
Even throughout breakfast Remus remained uncharacteristically quiet and Sirius was wondering if it was because he'd spooned his mate with a hard-on earlier or if there was something else bothering Remus.
"So, what do you want to do today, eh?" Sirius asked, trying to start a conversation Remus would engage in for what felt like the tenth time that morning. "You wanna spend the day plotting tonight's shenanigans, like the good old days? We could scout the forest. There's a pretty nice lake we could have a butcher's at."
"Whatever you want to do I'm up for. I don't really mind," Remus said, shrugging noncommittally as he buttered his toast.
Sirius sighed, deeply, as it became harder and harder not to be extremely annoyed at Remus's lack of engagement.
"A Sickle for your thoughts, Moony?" Sirius tried again, putting his tea cup down and focusing all his attention on Remus in an effort to make it impossible for the latter to give a non-answer this time.
"Oh, I assure you, they're not worth that much," Remus answered, still looking down at his toast although the butter had already been spread to perfection.
"I disagree," Sirius objected. "I'd pay a Galleon to hear your thoughts on Flobberworm diet and still think I got my money's worth. What's on your mind?"
Remus sighed, and Sirius waited for an answer to form.
"I was just thinking about my mum and dad, that's all," Remus finally said.
"Oh, really? What about them?" Sirius asked, hoping they were alright, but at the same time thankful Remus wasn't thinking about the small mishap from earlier.
"Nothing in particular, I was just thinking about them. And worrying a little bit," Remus went on and finally stopped looking at his bloody toast for the benefit of looking at Sirius instead. "I just hope they'll be alright. You know, with the war and everything. With mum being a Muggle and what dad does for a living, I wouldn't be surprised if they're targeted. And I was just thinking about them now because I know how much they'll both worry about me today."
Well, if there ever was a benefit of being disowned from having strongly disagreed with your family on at least 75 different fronts it was clearly that you didn't really have to worry about them during a war, Sirius thought solemnly.
"When was the last time you saw them?" Sirius asked instead of sharing the thought he'd just had.
"About a month ago," Remus sighed. "I had lunch with them on my birthday."
"Well, what do you say we pay them a visit today, then?" Sirius suggested. "Might do all of you some good. They don't have to worry about how your night will be because they'll know you'll be with me and you'll get to see them and know they're alright. It's foolproof."
Obviously, the Lupin's didn't know the full scope of how Remus's friends were able to spend the full moon with their transformed son as the fact that they were unregistered animagi was a Level 2 Marauder Secret, meaning that it was under no circumstances allowed to leave the four of them. A semi-exception had been made in regards to Remus's parents being allowed to know that their son wasn't spending the full moons alone as that had been a true relief for them, but they hadn't been told how the Marauders had managed it. But since Remus's father, Lyall, was an expert on non-human spirituous apparitions at the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, he still had a fairly good idea of what was happening, but they all had a silent 'don't ask, don't tell'-understanding and the Lupin's could still find comfort in that.
"Would you be okay with that? Visiting them?" Remus asked, now even putting his toast down.
"What? Of course, I love your parents, and they love me! Of course I'd be up for popping by," Sirius said. "Hey, you don't happen to know if your mum has got that new Black Sabbath album, would you?"
Remus rolled his eyes, but it wasn't really an annoyed eye roll as Sirius knew Remus actually found it rather adorable that his mum, Hope, and Sirius shared an interest in music, especially contemporary Muggle music.
"No, I haven't got a clue, you'll just have to ask her yourself," Remus said, and Sirius saw a hint of a smile somewhere there.
They finished up breakfast and proceeded to take Sirius's flying motorbike to pay Lyall and Hope Lupin a surprise visit. As Sirius smoothly landed the bike in the Lupins' driveway the front door opened and a woman ran out towards them.
"Hi mum!" Remus waved at Hope as she reached them. "We thought we'd just pop by and say hi, is that alright?"
"Is it alright? Of course it's alright, what a stupid question! Come here, Remus!" Hope said, pulling her son into a long hug and kissed his cheeks several times. "Oh, we're always so happy when we get to see you!"
"I know, mum. I've missed you," Remus mumbled, hugging her back.
"And you too, of course, Sirius." Hope turned and gave Sirius an equally warm hug accompanied by equally many kisses and Sirius allowed himself to relish the comfort of motherly love, at least for a moment.
"So, what are you lads up to, today?" Hope asked when she'd released Sirius. "Come, let's go inside and tell me all about it, I'll put the kettle on."
Well seated in the Lupins' cosy kitchen Sirius and Remus started telling Hope and Lyall about how they'd spent the day before mending Sirius's motorbike and their plans for the night.
"Is James and Peter joining you as well?" Hope asked, refilling their tea.
"No, it'll just be Sirius and me tonight," Remus said, but Sirius was careful not to neither confirm nor deny this.
"We got wolfsbane," Sirius said instead. "So it'll probably be a somewhat uneventful night, at least in comparison to… well, you know… " He trailed off before he gave away any incriminating details of the usual nature of their moon strolls. "It'll be fun, I'm looking forward to it. Say, Hope, you don't happen to have heard Black Sabbath's latest album yet? There are some real gems there, I reckon. "
As Sirius had expected Hope chose to focus on the last part and gave Sirius a fond smile, but Lyall, on the other hand, didn't seem to miss the implication of chaos and recklessness. He didn't say anything, however, and Sirius was grateful for the faith Lyall had in him and the other Marauders; trusting them with his son under such conditions.
"You know, I have listened to it, but I still think his solo projects have the edge," Hope told Sirius, who had to agree, although they both admitted it might just be the novelty of Ozzy Osbourne's solo career.
Hope insisted that Sirius and Remus stayed for lunch, and since the two of them didn't really have anywhere else to be they happily did. After a delicious mash-topped beef and Guinness pie Remus helped Hope clear away their plates and Lyall asked Sirius for his opinion on a project he'd been working on in the study.
"So, there isn't really a project," Lyall confessed as the two of them were out of earshot from Remus and Hope. "But I do still want to get your opinion on something."
"Alright," Sirius said, not really surprised as he couldn't fathom a project where his two Knuts on the matter would be better than Remus's. "How may I be of assistance?"
"Well, it's about Remus," Lyall said, sitting down at his desk. "But equally it's about you."
"I'm sorry?" Sirius blinked a few times, not sure how to interpret this. Did Lyall know something Sirius wasn't even sure he knew himself yet?
"No, no, it's not about you and Remus." Well, that didn't clear things up for Sirius. But luckily, Lyall continued. "I know we have a don't ask, don't tell-agreement about what really happens during the full moon, but tonight is a blood moon, Sirius. It's a particularly trying one. I just want to make sure you are really safe."
"Oh, well, that's very nice of you, Lyall. But as we told you, we got wolfsbane so we'll be alright," Sirius said, but Lyall wasn't having it.
"The wolfsbane doesn't make it safe for a human to be alone with a werewolf during a blood moon, you know I know that. And I know you're a sharp man; you know that as well," Lyall said. "Sirius, I'm only asking you this because I don't want to see you get hurt or Remus having to live with hurting you; but you need to tell me what you're doing tonight and how you're doing it."
Shit. Fuck! The last thing Sirius wanted to do was lie to Lyall and Sirius knew Lyall could be trusted with the truth and that it would bring Remus's parents peace. But this was something he just couldn't tell. It was a Level 2 Secret.
"I'm sorry, Lyall, I can't tell you how it's done," Sirius said. "But I can tell you, in confidence, that I've kept Remus company during the full moon since we were 13, without wolfsbane, I might add, and we've come up with a system that works. You just said I was a sharp man, so all I can ask is that you have faith in me and trust my judgment."
"Merlin's beard!" Lyall gasped. "Since you were 13? I had no idea it had been that long. You were so young. But… How? And without wolfsbane, nonetheless?"
"Still can't say, I'm afraid. But I hope you know how much Remus means to me and that I would never let anything that could hurt him happen. And that includes him accidentally hurting someone else," Sirius said. "So, I'm afraid it comes down to whether or not you trust my judgment."
There was a long pause as Lyall mulled this over.
"Of course I trust your judgment," he finally said. "I just wish you'd tell me how you do it."
"One day we might be able to," Sirius said. "But just for a laugh, do you want to share your hypothesis?"
"Oh no, I'm not doing that. I've got my theories, though, each one as unlikely as the next one," Lyall laughed. "But I'll make you a deal, Sirius. The day you tell me how you're managing to keep Remus company with no danger to anyone of you I'll tell you my wildest ones, alright?"
"Alright, old chap, you've got yourself a deal!" Sirius grinned, shaking Lyall's hand.
…
"Can I tempt you, Moony?" Sirius was dangling a beer bottle in Remus's line of vision once they were back at Sirius's house.
"In a couple of hours I'm about to transform into a savage murdering beast, I hardly think lowering my inhibitions beforehand is a wise choice." Remus muttered, pushing the bottle away from him.
"But we got the wolfsbane!" Sirius argued, opening his own bottle and taking a sip. "And you're a grown man, one beer will hardly lower your sense of self control to a disastrous degree." He opened the second bottle anyway. "And besides, just as you said; you'll transform in a couple of hours."
He offered Remus the beer again,
"Come on, relax and have a beer with me."
Remus hesitated for a brief moment before he accepted the beer.
"You're a bad influence on me, Padfoot," he said as the two of them sat down in the small sitting room. "All of you were. You know, you should never have run around with a werewolf all over the school grounds. When I think of how many times it could have ended in disaster… " He trailed off, staring into the fire with, by the looks of it, some heavy thoughts on his mind. Eventually he seemed to think better of it and he shook his head. He then smiled. "But it never did. And you, James and Peter made the full moons not only bearable, but actually something to look forward to. And for that I'll be forever grateful."
Yes, this is it. Now is the time, the voice at the back of Sirius's mind said. Make the suggestion.
"You know, speaking of which… " Sirius said, casually, as if he hadn't been brewing this idea since yesterday. "What do you say we ask James and Peter over? You know, like a last full moon-havoc feast, so to speak? I mean, with an open war upon us, who knows when we'll have the chance next time?"
"Are you out of your mind?" Remus almost shouted.
Bollocks. I knew I should've waited until he finished the whole beer.
"How can you even think about something like that? Lily is six months pregnant! We can't ask James to go on a moon stroll with us. What if something happens? What if Lily goes into labour while we're out in the forest just monkeying around?" Remus went on as he was now pacing the sitting room, evidently too upset to be sitting still. "What if, Merlin forbid, I'd hurt one of you? What if I'd hurt James? How could I explain that to Lily? And later to their child?"
"Okay, before you spiral any further with these hypothetical disasters… " Sirius interrupted, "I was obviously suggesting everyone would be in their animagus form, hence not being in any danger. And obviously we'd check with Lily first if she's alright with it. It's just a few hours and she'd be sleeping anyway while he's gone. And couldn't she, like, I dunno, hold it in for a few hours if she happened to go into labour while we're out?"
The eyebrows shot into Remus's hairline and for a few moments he was at a loss for words.
"You know, it's really quite astonishing how little working knowledge you have about human reproduction," he said when he eventually found his words again.
"Oh, well," Sirius shrugged, noncommittally. "I'm sure I'll work it out if I ever really need to know. So where are we at with getting the old gang back together? Should I send a patronus?"
"No, you absolutely won't!" Remus barked. "You're not making James that offer. I don't want him asking this of Lily." He ran his fingers through his hair. "I need to use the loo, be right back."
"Sure. Second door on the right. You know where it is." Sirius gestured vaguely as Remus left the room, an ominous smile spreading across Sirius's lips.
But you never said I couldn't ask Lily.
Perfectly content in having found this loophole, Sirius grabbed a handful of floo powder and stuck his head into the fireplace as he called out the Potter's residence. A moment later the Potters' sitting room appeared, and to his great delight he saw Lily sitting in the armchair right in front of the fireplace, reading The Daily Prophet.
"Good day to you, Mrs Potter!" Sirius greeted with his most charming smile. "You're looking very lovely and pregnant today."
"Merlin's saggy left..!" The small shock of being unexpectedly interrupted by a face in her grate had Lily throwing the newspaper right in Sirius's face.
"Ouch! Watch it!" he complained and blinked soot out of his eyes.
"Oh, Sirius, I'm so sorry!" Lily said, now realising the face in her grate was a friendly and, for all intents and purposes, a harmless one. "Are you alright? Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, everything is just brilliant." Sirius grinned. "I was just popping in to say hi. Hi!"
Lily's features immediately relaxed,
"Oh, how nice of you." She gave him a smile. "But I'm afraid you just missed James, he just went out on an errand. I'll tell him you popped by, though."
"Oh, no, that's alright! It's actually you I wanted to talk to." Sirius said.
"Really?" Why Lily sounded so surprised, Sirius didn't know. Sure, James was his best mate in all the world, but Lily being James's mate, so to speak, made her an equally important member of the pack. At least in Sirius's mind.
"Of course, really!" he assured her. "For one, I haven't talked to you in a while. And second, it's my godchild you're baking in there. How are you both doing?"
"That's really sweet of you, Sirius," Lily smiled. "We're both fine. The baby is kicking, but luckily only during the day so I can still sleep through the night."
"Well, what did you expect? Naturally you and James would make a ballsy kid," Sirius grinned to which Lily laughed. "Have you thought of names yet? Are all of James's suggestions horrible? Do you need me to talk some sense into him and tell him you can't name my godchild something ridiculous like Linfred?"
"See, you're already a great godfather, looking out for their best," she said. "But that won't be necessary. We've actually agreed on two names."
His eyebrows shot up into his hairline,
"Oh, you have? Let's hear 'em!"
Lily beamed, placing a hand on her belly,
"We're thinking Heather if it's a girl. Harry if it's a boy."
"Are you really? That's excellent!" Sirius beamed. "Little Heather Potter. Little Harry Potter." He tried the names. "I do like both of them, but don't be crossed with me when I still call them Pronglest."
"Of course you will." Lily shook her head, but she was still smiling fondly. "Do you wanna step through and have a cup of tea?"
"Oh, I can't actually, sorry." Sirius said, glancing over his shoulder to check that Remus still wasn't back yet. "I'm, um… entertaining at the moment."
"You've got someone over? And you decided to floo me in the middle of it?" She frowned suspiciously at him. "It's not a date you've got over, is it?"
"What? No, it's just Remus." Sirius said. "He's staying with me for a few days but stepped out for a bit just now, you know…" He lowered his voice for some inexplicable reason. "Full moon is coming up and it's a bad one. It's a blood moon."
"Oh, he's gonna be with you?" Lily asked, letting out a relieved breath without even realising it. "I'm glad to hear he won't be alone. I was actually just thinking about how this would probably be a particularly bad one."
"Yeah, well, we're all doing what we can for our lovely Moony, aren't we?" Sirius grinned. "Speaking of which, I actually wanted to run something by you… " He checked over his shoulder again. Still no sign of Remus. "And Remus would absolutely kill me if he knew I was asking you this, but seeing as this one is a particularly intense hell for him, and let's face it, he's already gonna be sick of me even before night falls… You're well within your full rights to tell me I'm way out of line even for asking, but would you consider lending us your husband tonight? I know it would mean a lot -"
"Sirius! What the hell are you-? Did you floo Lily while I was out?"
Oops, that wasn't the opportune moment for Remus to reenter the room.
"Do you mind, Remus? I'm on a private floo call!" Sirius chastised over his shoulder, but before he had a chance to adress Lily again he felt a tug on his waistband and Remus tried to pry him from the grate. "Remus, knock it off!"
When Remus wasn't successful in getting Sirius away from the fireplace, he did the next best thing; he stuck his own head in the grate.
"Lily, I'm sorry!" he said, pleading up at Lily who'd advanced from the armchair down to the floor in front of the fireplace to get a better look at the comotion. "I told him not to ask you. I know you need James a lot more than I do right now and I'd never once wish for you- "
But Lily cut him off,
"Remus, it's fine. Really." She gave both men in her fireplace a warm smile. "I know you'd never ask, but I'm glad Sirius did. I'd love it for you lads to have a full moon feast again."
"You- You would?" Remus stuttered, and Sirius had to admit even he had thought Lily would've needed a bit more persuasion. "But you're… pregnant!"
"Why, thank you, Remus, for reminding me. But I feel it's time to let you know that pregnancy is a condition quite different from dying." She leaned forward, lowering her voice a bit. "But just between us… James really is the best husband I could've asked for, always tending to my every need. But honestly, I wouldn't mind some alone time. I mean, he's just here all the time."
At this, Sirius grinned,
"Well, say no more, milady! Your knights in shining armour will rescue you from… " He paused, thinking for a moment. " … your knight whose armour shines so bright it hurts your eyes? By relieving your eyes from it for a few hours? By dulling it up a bit?" He turned to Remus, although it proved quite difficult with both their heads wedged in the same grate. "What's a good analogy for this situation?"
Remus merely rolled his eyes at him before turning to back Lily,
"Are you absolutely sure you're alright with this?"
"Yes, I'm sure, Remus," Lily said. "You shouldn't feel the least bit guilty, you really would be doing me a favour. But don't let him know I said that!" She quickly added. "I don't want him to think I'm ungrateful, because I'm really not!"
"Your secret's safe with us, love." Sirius winked at her. "Level 1 Secret. We won't breathe a word about it."
"If anything happens, just send us a patronus and he'll come right home. We'll be in the forest at Sirius's." Remus said.
"And we even got wolfsbane!" Sirius filled in. "Can you believe how responsible we've become?"
Lily laughed again,
"Yeah, you lot really are the poster boys for being reliant. Have fun tonight, alright? And be careful!"
"We will, thanks, you're the best! Bye now! Talk to you later!" Sirius grinned before pulling his head out of the grate.
He heard Remus bidding his goodbyes to Lily and a moment later Remus, too, pulled his head out of the grate, giving Sirius a sour look.
"I told you not to ask her. But you did anyway," he muttered.
"Yeah, and she was absolutely fine with it, wasn't she? So, who's got doxie eggs on their face now? Hmm?" Sirius gave his friend a pointed look. "See what can happen when you don't assume the worst all the time?"
Remus didn't answer but just continued to look grumpily at Sirius.
"Moony, come off it, will you?" Sirius continued. "I get that you don't want to be a burden and what not, but when are you gonna get it through your head that you've got mates who gladly support you when you're having a rough time? You do realise that none of us are actually making any sacrifices by spending the full moon with you and that we actually want to?"
At this, Remus face relaxed a bit,
"I do know that. And I am grateful for it."
Sirius gave him an uncharacteristically shy smile and punched his shoulder lightly,
"You do deserve good things, you know that, right?"
"No, don't start with that. I get it. Just drop it, please." Remus rolled his eyes and Sirius was reminded of just how adorable he thought it was that Remus still was so bad at receiving compliments.
"Alright, but do me one favour, will you?" Sirius asked.
"Whatever you want," Remus promised.
"Promise me you'll try to relax and have a good time tonight?" Sirius asked. "Because I know I will, I'm stoked for tonight! But if you'll be going around worrying your hairs grey I'll worry too."
Remus looked at him, and Sirius could already see the worries beginning to melt away.
"Alright, I can do that."
Sirius wasted no time to send out patronuses to both James and Peter, telling them the full moon feast was a mandatory celebration at his house that evening. It didn't take long before both James and Peter had replied, announcing they wouldn't miss it for the world. As they waited for the sun to set Remus took his wolfsbane and his mood immediately improved. Sirius guessed that could only be expected since wolfsbane soothed the pain that was no doubt starting to get quite noticeable at this point. As they were preparing dinner they both joked around and laughed together and not before long Remus even seemed to be looking forward to the escapades the night had to offer.