He never knew what family was. Never knew what being cared for meant. Sure he still had his "mother and brother". They were alive somewhere. At least he thought. He didn't really care. They never showed love to him. His family was never like what he saw in movies. So what was family? He never knew until Pike found him and joined Starfleet.

Pike took him under his wings and became somehow his surrogate father. Showed him love and discipline him when necessary.

Then there was Bones. His best friend from day one and roommates at the academy. Bones was also by himself. He had a daughter but his ex wife took her away from him. He fought like hell for her but at the end he lost the fight. Now he only saw her when his ex wife let him. Bones was a doctor. This friendship they had was wonder and Bones was always grateful they found each other. Jim dislikes doctors and avoid them if he could. But Bones... Bones somehow could treat him if necessary without getting a panic attack. Jim trust his friend with his life and he would give anything to protect his friend.

Now he was captain of his own ship. Spock was his first officer. They disliked each other in the beginning but know they wouldn't go anywhere without each other. Their friendship grew and Spock became more protective over him. When he thought about that he also noticed that with Bones. He really didn't knew what to think about it and didn't knew what to do. So he called the one person who could help him making sense of what was happening. His surrogate father.

"I don't understand Chris. We were just friends and now they are behaving like this and lecturing me that I was irresponsible or something." Jim told him.

Pike just laughed and shook his head. Jim looked confused at him. "What?"

"Kid remember how you and I behaved in the beginning and how we are now?"

Jim raised an eyebrow. Really didn't understand where this was going. "Yes" he said uncertain.

"You didn't understand it then either what I was doing. I was showing you love, took care of you when necessary and discipline you if you needed it." Pike told him.

"Yes, but you explained it to me. You said that family did that. You became my family."

Pike smiled at Jim a sad smile. He sounded like a little child telling him he had found his family. "Yes you are right. And now your family is getting bigger. Spock and McCoy have a family yes, but they don't have been in contact with them much. Starfleet became their family just like yours did."

"Yes and we are friends but that doesn't explain why they are behaving so differently." Jim told him and shook his head in confusion.

"They want to be more then just friends Jim. And I think in fact they already are. They are your brothers kid."

Jim looked up at that. "Brothers? But brothers don't..."

Pikes sighs. Jim was a bright kid but understanding family was like hocus pocus to him. So here he was again explaining what siblings were to Jim.

Now two years later after the conversation he had with Pike, he understood what brothers were and soon after that conversation both Spock and Bones explained to him how they felt. Jim was their little brother, Spock the middle and Bones was the oldest brother.

"There you both are!" Bones said as he stepped into Jim's quarters. "I have been looking for you two all over this place."

Both Spock and Jim looked up from their chess game. "Well not everywhere or you wouldn't come here. It's not logical to look in other places first if you were looking for the captain or I. You should start at our quarters or the bridge." Spock told him.

Bones rolled his eyes and took a deep breath. "You had to say it, didn't you?"

"Well he got a point Bones." Jim said with a smile.

Spock took a moment to look at the doctor and frowns. "You looked stressed Leonard. Is something on your mind? I think the stress is compromising you from thinking clearly."

Bones sighs and took a hypo out of his pocket. Jim immediately stood up with his hands up in defense.

"Wow get away with that thing from me. I didn't do anything!"

"This it not for you, you dumbass. Sit down. It's for Spock."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

"It's a vaccine I need to give you. Apparently there was a virus on Vulcan that only Vulcans could get, and they told me to give you this. Now hold still." Bones said and put the hypo on Spocks neck.

"Pff well glad it's you this time Spock." Jim said and sat down again.

Bones put the hypo away and sat down next to his two brothers. "Not so fast Jimbo."

"Leonard this couldn't be the reason you looked so stressed." Spock told him when Bones sat down.

"It's not. Well not much. I knew you wouldn't ran away like certain people." Bones said and looked at Jim who looked away when he said that.

"So what is it?" Spock asked.

"I knew it wouldn't be a good idea to drag Jimbo here down to sickbay because he would probably not stay there, so I thought a good talk with his "big Brothers" would help".

"Oh boy" Jim mutters. This can't be good and he couldn't get away. The table was in the front of him and a wall behind him. Bones had put his chair right next to him so he couldn't get away.

Spock raised his eyebrow at that and immediately looked concerned at the both of them. An emotion they only saw when he was with them. "What is going on?"

"Jim, I found out you dispose most of your food when you get it in the mess hall. We know you are very good at hiding so it took a while to notice that you have not been eating. Or at least not enough! You wanna tell us about it kid?" Bones asked seriously.

"Just wasn't hungry." Jim said as he moves a chess piece. "Your turn Spock."

"Don't avoid the conversation Jim. This is serious. And you knew we were going to find out or you wouldn't be hiding." Spock said and crossed his arms while Bones ran a tricorder over Jim's body. Jim was getting nervous but kept his mouth shut.

"Has this something to do with you not sleeping properly?" Bones asked concerned. Jim looked up at that with wide eyes.

"How do you..." Jim begins but immediately shut his mouth when he knew he gave something away.

"You are not sleeping? How come we didn't noticed?" Spock asked as he now took a good look at Jim, he saw the bags under his eyes.

"He is taking naps everywhere. Some of the crew told me about it and were concerned. If you look in his bathroom you will find out how he was able to hide it." Bones told him disapproved.

"You looked in my...!" Jim was getting agitated. He felt trapped. Spock and Bones shared a look in concern. Suddenly Jim felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Bones who was looking really worried.

"Kid, you know we are here for you right? You are not alone. If you got a problem you can come to us. There is no shame in that. All we want to do is help you and love you. We are concerned and worried if you hide things from us."

"We can not help you if you are hiding things. Most important it could hurt you. We don't want that to happen Jim. Now will you let us in. This is what brothers are for." Spock said and Bones looked approving at him.

Jim took a moment and looked away. He remembered the conversations he had with Pike many times. But family was still a hard part for him. Just to rely on them. He wanted to but he could not always do that. Old habits are hard to die. Even if they knew most of his childhood.

Jim took a couple of deep breaths before he finally spoke. "Nightmares."

Bones and Spock both looked at each other. "You are having nightmares? Is that why you can't sleep?" Bones asked to be sure. It was like talking to little child sometimes with Jim.

"Yes."

"Why didn't you come to us Jim? We could have helped you." Spock said.

Jim sighs. "I thought they would disappear eventually. They always do."

"But this time they didn't huh? Spock is right. You could have come to us. I could give you a sedative if you want."

Jim shook his head . "No. No sedative. Don't want.."

"Are the nightmares the reason you are not eating?" Spock asked.

Jim stood up. He needed to move. Bones saw this and this time he let him. He was always getting restless when his mind was restless. Jim was opening up to them so he wasn't worried he would leave the room.

After some pacing Jim finally spoke again. "Tarsus IV. I dream about Tarsus IV. I see them dying. I can't eat. I will just throw it up again because the nightmares are still too fresh."

Spock suddenly saw a connection. "You are taking naps over the day. Are you experiencing the nightmares then too?" Bones looked at him curiously.

"Yes, why?"

"When you normally have a nightmare you skip breakfast but you will eat lunch and diner. But now that you are taking naps..." Bones explained to him when he knew what Spock was thinking.

"I see the nightmares all day long." Jim realized and sat down on the side of his bed.

"Yes, precisely." Spock said and turned to Bones. "Does he needs to go to sickbay for his health?" He asked concerned.

"No I found out soon enough. But now it's time to fix it before it becomes worse." Bones said and walked to Jim and gave him his hand. Jim looked confused at him.

"Come on up." Jim still looked confused but took his hand. Bones then leads him to the bathroom and gave him his sleeping clothes. "Time for bed. Brush your teeth and change in those clothes."

Jim looked at him with wide eyes. "I can't just... you can't just..." he stutters.

"You can and you will. Come on Spock and I will stay with you."

"You don't have..."

"Yes we will Jim. Now do what Leonard said." Spock said in a stern voice who was already changed in his night clothes. Both Bones and Spock had clothes in Jim's room in case they would spend the night here.

Jim sighs but did what was asked. There was no way of arguing now. Not with the both of them. A couple of minutes later all three of them had their night clothes on and had brush their teeth. Jim just stood in his room looking like a lost puppy. Bones sighs and took Jim's hand and leads him to the bed. He lay him down and sat next to him. Putting Jim's head on his chest while stroking his hair. He knew that this would calm Jim down. The sound of his heartbeat would bring him to sleep. Spock took his place on the other side of the bed and and took hold of Jim's wrist. This way he could give Jim his calm thoughts to help him sleep. Half an hour later the three of them were asleep. Taking care of their little brother who slept peacefully in the middle after a week of no sleep.

Spock was the first one to wake up. As a Vulcan he didn't need as much sleep as a human would. During the night they prevented the nightmares as well as they could. Bones now had Jim in a tight protective embrace and he wouldn't let go soon. No one would harm their little brother. Jim was curled against his side and had a tight hold on his shirt.

Spock decided to let them sleep while he showered. After the shower he would sit in the chair next to the bed while working on his PADD. He would watch over them.

An hour later Spock noticed Bones waking up and they shared a look. Bones then looked down at Jim who was still sleeping peacefully.

"You awake long?" Bones whispered.

"An hour and 14 minutes. Jim didn't had a nightmare for the last 7 hours." Spock said in also a soft voice.

"I noticed he slept more peacefully. I think it worked. He needed us. Do we have to wake him already?"

"It's still early. He can sleep for another hour and 19 minutes." Spock said while looking at Jim. Bones nodded and ran his hand through Jim's hair until it was time.

45 minutes later Jim opened his eyes and looked confused around him. He couldn't move because arms were around him. Jim panicked a little until he heard Bones voice.

"Hey calm down. It's just me. Take a couple of deep breaths. Let yourself wake up properly." Bones told him softly.

When Jim noticed it was Bones holding him he relaxed a little. He also noticed Spock sitting in the chair. "You two stayed with me the whole night?" Jim asked as he sat up and this time Bones let him.

"Yes. You needed your sleep Jim and we could help you. You did not have any nightmares while you slept." Spock told him.

Jim was running a hand through his hair. "I noticed."

"So next time you have a nightmare or can't sleep you come to us deal? I don't want any of this happen again." Bones said and gave him a stern look.

Jim sighs. "Deal." He said and stood up to take a shower.

When they all were ready they went to the mess hall to get some breakfast. And Jim would eat under the watchful eye of his two brothers.

Breakfast was almost over when Scotty came to them. "Ah captain it's good to see you here. I need your help."

"My help? With what?"

"In engineering. Remember that problem the other day? Well..."

Jim rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me it's broke again Scotty. I told you what went wrong the last time."

"I know sir. But some cadet decided to..."

Jim stood up and held his hand up to stop him for speaking further. "Please you didn't. Alright I am done here and come with you. Spock you have the conn."

"Yes captain." Spock said. Jim nodded and followed Scotty out of the room.

"And we are back to normal". Bones said as he took a bite of his breakfast.

"Nothing is normal with Jim around doctor."

Bones had to laugh at that. "Yeah that is true Spock."

It was four days later after that night and Jim still had nightmares. In the middle of the night Jim would go to either Spock or Bones room. They would take care of him. They were pleased that Jim came to them but they were also concerned. And now the crew also noticing things that were wrong about Jim.

"Uhmm Doctor McCoy? Do you have a moment?" Uhura asked nervously when she knocked on the door of his office.

Bones looked up. "Luitenant Uhura, of course. Come in. Is something wrong?"

Uhura closed the door of the office and sat down in a chair. "Have you noticed something wrong with the captain?"

Bones raised an eyebrow. "With Jim? What do you mean?"

"Uhmm well, Scotty came the other day to Sulu and asked if something happened to the captain because he was behaving strangely in engineering. He would play with things that are not meant to be played with. He should know that. Sulu didn't noticed anything until yesterday. He was annoying to Sulu. He would touch buttons on his panel and when Sulu said something about it to the captain, he told Sulu that he was boring. So Sulu told me about it and what Scotty told him. Then this morning the captain argued with everyone, every answer he gave was no. And then later, he was wondering why there wasn't a movie playing on those screens. So that is why I am here. This is not normal behavior for a captain. Something is wrong. This is not Jim."

Bones was silent for a moment. This was something big. "Where was Spock? Why didn't he come to me? He would notice something." Bones was wondering.

"That is the weird thing. Jim would only do those things when Spock was away." Uhura told him.

Bones ran a hand through his hair. Something was indeed wrong with Jim. He should have seen it. Jim never would come immediately to Spock or his room when he had a nightmare. He never would just come for comfort. And now this behavior what Uhura told him. It was almost childlike. He needed to examine his friend so he pressed a button. "Doctor McCoy to Captain Kirk."

"Kirk here. What is it Bones?" Came the voice through the speaker.

"I need your help in sickbay."

"Okay Bones. I'm coming. Kirk out."

Uhura looked at McCoy. "You think it's something serious Leonard?"

"I don't know Uhura. But we know for sure that something is wrong. You better go back to the bridge before Jim sees you. He would know immediately that something is wrong if he noticed you."

Uhura nodded and stood up. "You are right."

"Uhura, thanks for letting me know." Bones said when Uhura opened the door. Uhura smiled before she left.

A couple of minutes later Jim came to his office. "Hey Bones. What can I do for you?" Jim asked playful.

Bones sighs. "Come follow me." Bones said and sat Jim on a biobed.

Jim looked confused and a little panicked. "What's going on Bones? Why am I sitting on this bed! I not sick or injured!"

"I need to take a look at you. Look at the light for me." Bones said and shone a light into his eyes to check his pupils. His pupils were fine but his eyes were more blue than before. At least he thought. "Any headache, nausea, dizziness, confusion?"

Jim shook his head agitated. "No! Yes to confusion. Why are you doing this. Put that thing away!" Jim said as Bones held up a tricorder as he tried to get off the bed.

"Because something is wrong with you and I need to find out what it is. Your behavior is getting stranger every day. I need to take some blood."

"No! No way! Get away from me with that thing!" Jim yelled now. He moves again and this time he succeeded to get away and ran out of sickbay. Bones shook his head and sighs. This was going to be difficult. Something happened. Bones walked back to his office. He needed to call someone who maybe knew more.

"Doctor McCoy, what can I do for you?" Admiral Pike asked when his face appears on his screen.

"Admiral Pike. We got a situation and I hoped that maybe you knew more. Has Jim been on a secret mission in the last 2 weeks?"

Pike looked confused. "A secret mission? Not that I know about. What is wrong with him?" He asked concerned. Bones hesitates to answer. He knew if he told him officially that Jim would be put off duty immediately no questions asked.

Pike noticed McCoy's hesitation and knew immediately what he was thinking. "It's off the record son. You know how I feel about that kid. I will do anything for him."

Bones sighs and told him what Uhura told him earlier and what happened just a couple of minutes ago in sickbay. "He has nightmares for over a week now. Except for one day. But then they came back and he would come to me or Spock. He is not himself. So I was hoping you knew more if something happened."

Pike frowned. "Does he have a concussion? Did he hid his head."

"No I already checked that. It was also the first thing I thought about."

"Why does he have nightmares everyday except that one day? What happend on that day?" Pike asked suddenly.

"Uhmm I noticed he wasn't sleeping and then some of the crew noticed he didn't eat either. So I confronted him with Spock in his room and he told us. So we both stayed that night with him so he could sleep."

"He needed his brothers huh. It's almost if he is behaving more like a child. Looking for comfort, playing with things, attitude."

"Yes I came to the same conclusion. Only I don't know why, how and what we should do." Bones said desperately.

Pike leans forward. "Leonard you have to take him off duty. It's not safe, we both know that. Check his last mission and if he took something. Search his room. Maybe something is there to give us answers. Let Spock help..." suddenly there was a beeping noise.

"Spock to Doctor McCoy." Bones looked confused at Pike but answered.

"McCoy here."

"Doctor I need you to come to the captain quarters immediately. It's urgent."

Bones looked worried. "I am on my way. McCoy out." Bones then looked at the screen.

"Keep me posted Leonard. Go now. Spock sounds worried and that is something for a Vulcan." Pike said.

"I know. I will contact you soon." Bones said and went to Jim's quarters. Something was so wrong.