Chained like an animal. It reminded Subaru Natsuki of the one time his parents had allowed him to visit the Tokyo Zoo. The animals- a variety of fish, mammals, and reptiles were all locked behind a prison of ten centimetre thick bulletproof glass. He could not reach in and grab one. As a result, the inverse occurred to the innocent creatures- they could not escape their fate in captivity. The boy remembered looking through that same glass, his hands touching the window as he stared in child-like amazement.
Petelguese had sat before him in the quiet atmosphere of the cave, but his eyes showed his undoubtably insanity. The Archbishop of Sloth's fingers were caked with blood, self-inflected from either his insanity or the frustration he felt at Subaru's lack of emotion. His cult, or at least his section of the Witch Cult stood behind him. Whether Archbishop or loyal minion, they watched, as silent as death. He was the animal, the boy had long since realised this fact.
They were strong. Far too strong for Subaru to fight alone... or maybe he was just that weak. It was most definitely the latter. He had always been weak, whether in intellect, physicality and more recently, magical prowess. His teenage body was not suited for combat, neither talented in swordsmanship or hand-to-hand combat. Since he had been summoned to this world, and a couple of months after that day- Subaru had been unable to have a complex thought.
His gate, where he had learnt mana was stored within his body, was too small to be useful. It nearly broke after withstanding a single shamac- the basic yin spell. Subaru had been thrust into this world where any random person could possess enough power to blow apart a small village with a finger, he had come to the unfortunate realisation that he was too weak to survive in this climate. It was actually kind of ironic. In a sick and horrifying way.
"Hah," a bitter laugh left his parched lips, which had drunk water for several days. Petelguese looked at him with slight confusion. As if he couldn't comprehend why the boy was laughing in such a dire situation. If it had been any other person, the Archbishop of Sloth would have been right. No normal person would laugh when chained to the stone of a cave where an Archbishop of the Witch Cult made base camp. They would be either extremely silent, hoping to live another minute, or screaming their heads off in a last effort to beg for help.
Subaru Natsuki was not a normal person.
While he may be weak in physical ability and magical prowess, what he wasn't lacking was resolve. No one could understand. No one can comprehend what he could do. In a world where everyone expects Subaru to achieve nothing, he could accomplish absolutely anything. Death wasn't the end, only an obstacle that could be overcome. Such things as mortality didn't hold him back, as the boy had died many a time. For he was the only person who possessed Return by Death- a horrid curse that could fix anything that he thought went wrong.
Subaru looked towards his feet for the first time in what felt like thirty minutes. The soles of his modern shoes had become dyed with red, and beneath them rested flower of blood that had blossomed bright red. A petite young woman rested within her own blood, her maids dress bloody and her limbs placed at unnatural angles. Broken and deceased, no matter how much he used Return by Death, the boy didn't have enough time to save her. Rem was his greatest failure, and Subaru felt nothing when he gazed at her corpse,
That statement was untrue. It was a lie to cut all responsibility towards the people he cherished. Subaru could only feel regret and misery for a person he loved so to met such a horrid fate. But he had seen this exact scene countless times and as a result, he had long since been desensitised to the sight death. The smell of decomposing flesh and the screams of loved ones, which were burnt into each of senses, had become the norm. The boy had bared witness to a village full of rotting corpses, a mansion drenched with blood and a world freezing over by a great spirit he had once considered a dear friend. Subaru had accepted it all like a bitter pill, swallowing the trauma and fear to save those he cherished.
He had realised that death was unavoidable, a necessary evil that he had to live with to move past the constant loops. He had stopped trying, as every action led to the same results and brought him pain. The failure of not saving anyone despite trying so hard- he could no longer swallow it. Subaru could no longer take that pill. He was a selfish bastard and covered his heart in despair to avoid such agony. Although once ago- in a life that had long ago faded like a light mist- he wasn't always like that. He had once prayed. He had once begged. He had once pleaded. But eventually, Subaru mourned the death of those he cared for in previous loops, but not a single soul listened. No one cared. Not a god from the heavens, nor a woman with green hair that could do so much.
No one expected anything from him. That was the truth. Not a half-elf whom he loved so much that he would suffer through an eternal hell for her own sake. Not the village he had saved a month ago with a curse afflicting his health for a short period of time. Not even Reinhardt, a friend he had made so long ago. No had tried to help him.
But that wasn't true, was it? Reinhardt had tried to apologise for Julius's mistake, but the Subaru of the past, who was in pain and had yet to accept return by death had refused such help. Emilia had healed him and tried to listen to his despair, resulting in her death. The village had smiled and tried to cheer him up- to say that not a soul helped would be a complete lie. But despite this, Subaru was alone in an eternal hell and no one seemed to care enough to notice the cold glint in his eyes.
All they saw was a fool. All they saw was a naive boy whose only ability was to talk big, and receive utter humiliation as a consequence in a duel that he had no chance of winning. They only saw a child in a man's body, whose only vital use was to be a punching bag. Subaru may be a literal human punching bag, but he was no child. While others had walked the path of roses and daisies- taking their sweet time and smiling brightly along the way. Meanwhile, he was struggling through a path full of broken glass with bare feet, his fingers bloody from the countless mistakes he had made in his countless lives.
Subaru could no longer blamed anyone for his mistake. He could no longer hide from the reality. The Royal Election and the embarrassment the Emilia Camp received was his own fault. The result of his incompetence as he tried to become something that was beyond his capabilities. The death of Rem, Petra, Ram, Emilia and Arlam village were brought because of his own inability. Everything that karma had brought to Subaru was because he had started a chain of events no amount of utilising Return By Death can solve.
After countless deaths and loops, he was no longer had the mentality of a child, but that of a middle aged man who had become stagnant. He didn't want to scream and blame everyone, claiming that all this suffering, that all this hurt was because of other people and not because if himself. Subaru had overcome such childlike naivety. He could only blame himself and with each death of a cherished friend, the burden over his shoulders seemed to become denser.
With each loop, the acceptance of failure became harder to ignore and could only blame his lack of intellect, of ingenuity. Subaru had tried to think outside the box, to be resilient and wait for a chance to save those he cared for. All his plans failed, Petelguese tearing them to shreds with his unseen hands. Every solution became a dead end with a mountain of corpses that were the result of his incompetence. His wrist covered in metal chains, he had long since stopped struggling and rested his head against the cave that he had been taken to. Closing his eyes, Subaru rested for the first time in a long while.
Seek Subaru Natsuki.
Slam!
"Shit, where could he be?"
A young woman walked through the forest that was located near Arlam. Her clothes were shabby and a black cloak concealed her. Hiding her once highly desired feminine curves. If one looked close enough, they would see a cylindrical bulge at her waist, hidden by her cloak. Any traveler that had had enough experience could instantly tell that the bulge was a sword. The woman's hair was a dark black, reminding anyone who laid witness to it of the black opal's that the nobles of the four nations sought for. Her eyes, slightly curved that held big, round eyes that were the colour of refined coal. She was beautiful in every sense of the word and was considered beyond any common man's league.
Although, in her hands was a well-looked after gospel. A gospel that had appeared on her desk next to her bed in the barracks of the capital of Vollachia. This gospel belonged to her. Its leather back cover tatter and worn from continued use, but the paper inside was intact, no a single tear within it. The book gave directions to the users desires, but the woman's gospel only had one sentence written in black ink. That was enough. She only had one goal, to find someone to led her. She may only have a single name- a full name, but it was still only just a name. There were no hidden meanings within the text, no descriptions of the man she had to find. There was nothing else but a name to led her to the person she she was destined to serve.
Despite her excitement a year ago, when she suddenly left her barracks and the military lifestyle behind in favour of a uncertain future- Yua Ichika was slightly annoyed. Subaru Natsuki, the name she knew belonged to the Archbishop of Pride. Eleven months ago, she had searched all over Vollachia, never feeling the pull that all minions of an Archbishop felt that could serve as a lead towards where he was.
The man who would be her everything and the man who she would give her all to. A man who wouldn't betray her, but despite her feelings of loyalty and the haste she had taken to find him- Yua was relatively unsuccessful in finding him. Until a month ago, when she first felt that pull and began to follow it like it was a rope in a blizzard. She had quickened her search and had found herself in Lugunica, where she felt the pull increase. She was close, the woman could feel it.
"So, you're here too." Her black eyes spied ten minions, dressed in black robes that were different from her own. She knew that she would receive a cloak just theirs when the met at the main Witch Cult hideout- wherever that was. She had met them once before on her travels. They were the Finger's of Sloth and belonged to the Archbishop of Sloths section of the Witch Cult. Yua didn't care all that much, for it had nothing to do with her lord.
He was all that mattered.
"Where's my lord?"
They didn't deem her question worthy enough to answer, or maybe they couldn't speak at all. She hadn't heard them speak when she had seen them last. It was unnerving, and that same eerie silence echoed across the forest. Yua's eyebrows knitted together in mid annoyance. One of the fingers raised a hand, a ball of flames roughly the size of a basketball was prepared to be launched in her direction. A Goa spell?! A ball of fury was sparked alight within her as the woman unsheathed her iron longsword in half a second. Despite their numbers and magical prowess, they were be no match for her. She was a master of the blade, her Divine Protection of the War God made that certain since birth.
But what to do about that Goa spell? Move? Avoid the attack radius completely? She had enough speed to do so without issue. No, the mage may be able to release another spell whilst she dealt with the other fingers. Yua had to kill the mage before the spell was complete. Eliminate the threat entirely. With a face devoid of expression, she moved with speed that not just everyone could react towards. Her sword glistening in the sunlight and met little resistance as the mages clothed head was decapitated. The body fell to the ground a second later, and not a single drop of blood met her shabby clothing.
Yua's black cloak waved in the wind, as if say farewell to the mages soul. In doing so, the lack of concealment revealed the tight-fitted black jeans and white shirt that had been hidden underneath it. She turned to the six others, a small smile that could send a chill of fear down a veterans spine. She had killed countless men, women and children during her service in Vollachia, what was the harm with a few dozen Witch Cultists. Despite the relaxed atmosphere, the woman's body posed in a position that could respond to any sister was a much better mage than this cultist, a fact that there was something that the talented Yua could never achieve had left a bitter taste in her mouth as a child. She was envious, as all she possessed as a weapon was a sword.
But even now, a sword would do.
"Who's next." It was not a question and the nine remaining fingers of sloth pulled out large cross-shaped daggers. The blades were covered with dried blood, showing that the wielder's of those blades lacked the care that all warriors should have for their weaponry. Yua frowned slightly, all sense of playfulness gone from her expression.
"Now, that just pisses me off."
Those nine fingers met a more brutal and painful death than the beheaded mage.
Subaru woke up to the sound of Petelguese screaming. Normally, such as thing was normal, for he was quite the boisterous when he got going. His yells of indignation, of fury echoed off the cave walls and reached the drowsy boys ears. If they had been the normal shouts of an insane man, he would have fallen back to sleep without any concern and wait to wake upon the market street of Lugunica's Capital City. But, weirdly enough, something tugged within his chest. Subaru groggily looked towards the entrance of the cave with half-lidded eyes. The five fingers that had remained in the cave were now dead, missing several limbs and a head. It was brutality that brought a sick smile to Subaru's lips.
He hadn't truly smiled in what seemed like forever.
His cold eyes could see that the person who had done such a horrid thing was a woman. Her black hair and even blacker cloak made her similar to the grim reaper that appeared within the folklore in his previous world. Her iron longsword was caked in blood and would have made any normal man curl into a ball in fear. Subaru instead laughed madly, smiling widely at the woman who had committed such retribution- sending a thrill through his ironclad heart.
The woman's cloak waved in the air as she dodged and cut the unseen hands that had claimed Rem countless times. Underneath her cloak, the boy could see that she wore a tight-fitted white shirt that hugged her ample chest and a pair of tight-fitted black jeans. She was one of the most beautiful woman he had seen and Subaru could tell that she was strong, the woman moving with grace that he had only seen from Reinhardt Van Astrea in the loot house. Ah, the good old days- where everything had been so very simple and straightforward.
But the woman couldn't defeat Petelguese, for he was an Archbishop of the Witch Cult that had plagued Lugunica for a hundred years. Unlike mages and spirits with their mana, an Archbishop was someone who had a certain power that could be used infinitely. Not just anyone could kill such a man who possessed strength that Subaru knew was close to Julius's own. This woman, no matter how strong, was not Reinhardt Van Astrea. She was no Sword Saint.
"Stay right there, my lord!" She called, her voice smooth like velvet and would have made any man's heart warm. However, Subaru ignored her beautiful pitch completely, pondering on how she could call him lord. Not a single soul expected anything of worth to come from his own ability. He was a burden, dead weight- everyone thought so. So why was there a certain amount of affection this woman's voice.
Shaking his head in pure confusion, the boy began to forsake such thoughts. He no longer cared not. Subaru knew that this woman would die soon. A new loop would begin anyways, even if she so happened lived. Even if Petelguese died, he had already lost this fight when Rem had been murdered. He would begin anew once more- an eternal loop of suffering that was so familiar to him that he no longer cried in outrage. The boy couldn't care less if that happened.
He had already repeated countless times, one more loop wouldn't impose on his already crumbling sanity. Closing his eyes, Subaru waited as he ignored the aching pain on his wrists. With his pitiful strength, he would try again to save everyone he cared for. He wouldn't fail to save those he cherished. Even if they cast him aside, even if they thought him completely useless- this resolve to save was what had kept Subaru going. After several minutes, it was surprising that Petelguese had yet to tear the woman apart. She was still moving, her blade slicing through every hand that the Archbishop had created. It seemed like she had even broke a sweat whilst doing so.
Could, she perhaps see them?
No, that wasn't possible. Only he could do so! Subaru firmly believed this and for each passing second, the advantage was slowly being tilted in the woman's favour. Petelguese was losing. He was losing! "Hah," a soft, hopeful laugh left his parched lips. He had been faced with so much despair during these countless loops, so much so that the boy had accepted that defeating the Archbishop of Sloth was an impossible feat. Maybe if he had Wilhelm, or even that bastard Julius at his disposal, slaying Petelguese could have been possible. He had firmly believe this, but as he watched the woman fight, he felt... hopeful. He thought that his desire to save everyone was a fools dream- but an actual possibility. The impossible burden on his small shoulders eased somewhat with this hope and a small smile made its way to Subaru's face. "Why?! Why can you see my hands?!" Petelguese's screams of frustration were glorious to his ears- but the woman didn't deem such a question worthy of a response. His shouts and screams of fury made Subaru shiver with satisfaction and this was only furthered when the woman ducked under an unseen hand whilst slicing through the arm, dispelling it completely without halting her charge. There were only six for a brief moment before another hand burst from the insane man's back.
Yes, somehow, she can see the unseen hands.
Petelguese could only summon seven at a time, he never summoned any more and Subaru was forced to believe that seven unseen hands was his limit. They were so what slow and the only advantage they had was that the hands were invisible. If they could be seen by a person strong enough- then it was gamer over for the Archbishop of Sloth. The boy knew this well, having gained sight of his hands during his third loop during this particular series of events. However, he was never strong enough to avoid all seven unseen hands. That woman was so close, close enough that a single false move would end Petelguese's life. It was close enough that Subaru began to pray, even when he knew that gods wouldn't waste a second to listen to his plea.
She propelled herself forward with her right leg, her sword aimed for his next in a horizontal slice. Without hesitation nor pity, the woman's sword met flesh and the Archbishop of Sloth's head came clean off. Blood sprayed in a show of gore that Subaru had long been used too. The blade had passed through the gaps in Petelguese's unseen hands and he couldn't have block it. He paid the smell no mind as he laughed madly.
"Hahahahahahahahah!"
His prayers had been answered! Petelguese Romanee-Conti- the Archbishop of Sloth, was finally dead! It was possible, with this woman, he could save everyone. The woman walked towards him, flicking the insane man's blood off of her blade skilfully. She carefully and gracefully stepped over Rem's corpses, noticing the look at warning he gave her. He may be used to death, but he wouldn't have her corpse disrespected. Rem deserved that much, at the very least. Suddenly, the woman flung the sword at him like it was javelin.
Ca-chunk!
Subaru didn't close his eyes nor flinch in fright, for he didn't sense any killing intent from the woman. Something he had learnt to sense through the countless deaths he had experienced, both with Elsa and more recently, Puck and Petelguese. Bloodlust was just as familiar to him as blood and death. The iron chains that had restrained him to the cave wall were severed. As easily as a hot knife cutting through butter. The woman kneeled as she carefully, nervously undid the cuffs at his wrist. His wrists were red with blisters and rashes from the several days he had remained in the cave. She gently gripped his hand with her small, callous one before pulling him to his feet. Up close, she was a beauty that could rival Emilia.
This woman can save everyone and Subaru felt eternally grateful. "Thank you," his words were quiet because of his hoarse throat, but they were just as sincere as when a thanked Emilia in that very first loop. The woman smiled sweetly, her features seemed to brighten by just how grateful he was. Her coal-like eyes burned with a fire of accomplishment and she bowed low enough for her hair to cover her pretty face. "It feels my heart with great warmth to be praised by you, my lord." Subaru was left somewhat confused (and speechless) by this confession. A feeling he felt every so often when something unexpected had occurred during a loop. He may have the ability to rewind time, but unexpected variables do appear every so often.
This woman was just one of them.
He took a deep breath before he asked a question, a question he wanted answered.
"Why are you treating me with such respect?" Subaru was worthless, everyone thought so. Abandoned and treated like shit by just about everyone- no one thought he would amount to much. The woman, still bowing, tilted her beautiful face towards him, her eyes wide in shock.
"How can I not respect my Archbishop?"
His confusion swiftly turned to anger, but the boy restrained any visible outbursts. This woman may be a cultist, but she had saved him and had thus saved Emilia in this loop. She could also be utilised easily, judging by how loyal she seemed to be. But this loop was lost- it had been since Rem drew her final breath. He had to restart. He still had to save Rem. Although, something was different now, he was hopeful. Subaru now knew it was possible, all thanks to the woman.
"What's your name?" The woman had stopped bowing and was suddenly standing straight, her ample breasts jiggled visibly due to such a fast movement, and her expression had shock written all over it. Subaru had long since learnt that this world had no such things as bras. Which once made talking to the opposite sex difficult for the once innocent and lacking boy of the past. However, after witnessing every atrocity that could be committed, he no longer cared about such trivial things. The him of the past was buried deep within his cold heart. A boy who was once arrogant and prideful was replaced by the current him- a man forged by the cruelty of the world. The man who had accepted his horrid ability and had all but given up.
Somehow, some way- the hope within Subaru's hearted didn't waver nor fade and he gave the woman a soft smile. His cold, narrow eyes watched as she stumbled over words in a nervous stumper. She had been clam and calculative during the battle with the Archbishop of Sloth but yet a few words from him installed such a reaction. It was cute and the man knew that no one had such high respect for him- not even Rem. "Yua. Yua Ichika." She uttered, brushing a loose lock of her black hair behind her left ear to hide her obvious shame at stuttering.
"Thanks Yua, you've helped me a lot." She nodded shyly, her eyes gazing into his own- as if to be praised by him was the only thing that mattered. Yua was differently a cute woman.
Still though, Emilia is much more cuter.
"I'll see you in the next loop." Yua didn't respond, her expression full of confusion. Despite her lost expression and before she could utter a response, Subaru suddenly grabbed her sword that rested by his feet. With speed that was unfamiliar towards those who had knew him, he picked it up by the blade and used the end of the blade to slot his throat.
"Nooooo! Don't leave me!" It was faded and distant, as if the young man was underwater. Then his world went black as a familiar sense of hands grasping his body, sending him back to his previous check point.