I've been thinking about the Teddy years for a while and I'm fascinated with Deacon and Rayna's relationship and what that would have been like back then. This clearly isn't how it went down but it has been fun to think about and play around with.

Deacon knew there was something going on with Rayna, he'd known for days, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what. More than one he'd wanted to ask her, but he didn't want to invade her personal space. Something at one point he'd have had no problem in doing. But over the past few months, they'd gradually built a steady, almost intimate relationship- not intimate in the way both secretly wanted- but they were closer now than they had been in years. They were able to talk, really talk to each other, lean on each other for support, touch albeit not in a sexual way but she often let her hand linger on his arm for longer than was probably necessary. Friends. They were back to being best friends.

Deacon hadn't been able to work out what had changed for Rayna. How she had gone from shutting him out and clearly having built an invisible wall between them, he presumed to protect her heart which he understood. But now, finally after what felt like a lifetime of waiting, the barrier was starting to crumble, much to his delight. Maybe he thought it could have been the night they sang at the Opry together a few weeks ago that had solidified her desire to be close to him again, or the afternoon they spent at the park with Maddie at Maddie's insistence- because she loved spending time with her Uncle Deacon. He really did love that little girl as though he was her own, and he'd do anything to make her happy, just like he would for her Mum.

Deacon was not complaining one bit at the amount of time they'd been spending together recently. He was grateful for the tour that was about to get underway in just under 3 weeks, meaning they'd been at rehearsals everyday and often found themselves in a little coffee shop at 4pm after rehearsal had finished. Deacon also wondered what Teddy thought about their new-found relationship. He didn't suppose Rayna would fill him in much when it came to how they were now closer than they had been in a long time, and how those feelings that were simmering on the surface were pretty damn close to boiling over. He had contemplated if there had been a shift in their marriage that she hadn't told him about. They had made an agreement, more like Rayna had made an agreement, not to mention Teddy and talk about their marriage. It was too painful, for them both, but particularly for Deacon. Rayna was well aware that everytime Deacon saw her and Teddy together, or her with Maddie, it caused him an immense amount of hurt. She knew he wished more than anything it could have been him wearing the wedding band, him getting in the car and driving home with her to their daughter, him holding her hand as they walked down the street, being proud he's the lucky son of a bitch that got to share her bed every night. Some nights he would be overwhelmed with the anger at himself for throwing it all away. She invaded his thoughts every minute of every day, and despite how grateful he was he hadn't lost her altogether and she was still in his life, it didn't prevent red hot tears stinging his eyes every night as he laid alone in his bed, staring at her pillow. He hadn't wanted a family or a relationship before he met Rayna, but that all changed the moment he laid eyes on her and now it's the only thing he wants in his whole life- to be Rayna's family.

As he entered the parking lot at rehearsal a few minutes late, he noticed Rayna's car wasn't there, which was strange considering she was A) never late and B) chided him constantly for being late, claiming it wasn't professional. He'd asked her if she was going to fire him for it, and she just shook her head and walked away. He said hello to the band and to Bucky who asked if he knew where Rayna was, also expressing some mild concern at her unusual tardiness.

'I haven't heard from her, have you called her?' Deacon asked.

'Yeah, I've called but she isn't answering,' Bucky frowned and went to pick up his phone checking to see if she had called him back.

'It's only a few minutes, Bucky. She'll be here. She might be stuck in traffic taking Maddie to the playgroup, give her 10,' He said calmly. He wasn't particularly worried, more curious as to what had gone on to make her late considering he'd never known her late in her life. She was late for a lot of things, but rehearsal wasn't one of them.

After 15 minutes and still no sign of Rayna, Deacon pulled out his phone and dropped her a quick text to see if everything was ok. 'Hey Ray, just making sure you're ok? We're ready when you are.' He always had a debate in his head whether to send a kiss or not at the end of texts, but in the end he decided not to. Just as he pressed send, the door opened with a pale and tired looking Rayna walking in. Deacon took in her appearance and studied her carefully as she werely walked closer to where he was standing. Something was definitely off and he was worried. As Rayna dropped her bag beside him, she made no eye contact, just mumbled an apology, placed her jacket on the chair and made her way over to the stage to join the crew.

Before Rayna could reach the stage, Deacon gently grabbed her arm pulling her back towards him.

'Ray, what's going on?' Deacon asked her softly in her ear, leading her away from the rest of the group.

Rayna still made no eye contact with Deacon, her eyes glued to the scuff on her boot, her hands playing with the hem of her shirt which Deacon knew she did when she was nervous or anxious about something.

'Nothing, Deacon. I'm fine. Just a rough morning with Maddie that's all,' She replied weakly, her tone making it blatantly obvious it was a lie.

'Ray, you're not fine. You're pale and you look like you've been crying. I can see you're not fine,' He knew what Rayna was like, she could be stubborn and it takes a lot for her to break down. He didn't want to be too pushy but he didn't like to see her like this, he wanted to be there for her this time.

'Deacon, please,' He thought she was going to shut him down but her response was gentle, and vulnerable. 'I can't do this right now. We've got to rehearse, we can go to our spot after?' Finally Rayna looked into his eyes and he saw anguish there, a vulnerability that hadn't been there in a long time, not the Rayna he knew, that was for sure.

'Of course, I'm here for you, Ray. Whatever you need,' Deacon held out his arm and took her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. She gave him a feeble smile before retrieving her hand and walking over to the band to begin the first song.

If Deacon were honest, it had rattled him seeing her like this. He thought he could be dramatic but he hadn't seen her like this in a long time. Something must have really affected her for her to show up at rehearsal without the perfected Rayna Jaymes performance smile. She had always been his rock, through the amazing times and the rough. Now it was his turn to be her rock, he was determined to be there for her. It was a good sign that she was wanting to meet at their spot, that meant she was going to open up to him. That was the place they always met when they wanted to talk about something big, it provided them with an air of tranquility despite all of the crazy things going on in their lives.

Rehearsal went smoothly even though Rayna's mind was clearly elsewhere. But in true Rayna fashion, she put on a brave face and powered through, he had so much respect and admiration for the woman standing on the stage, acting as though this was the most important thing in her life even though it obviously wasn't. She amazed him how, no matter what she was going through, even when she was sick with worry when he'd been on a bender and didn't know where he was, she was able to hide it and perform like she was the happiest woman on earth. Something that he hadn't been able to do. If people were to judge appearances, anyone would have thought it was Deacon on the verge of a breakdown, he was extremely anxious about the conversation with Rayna and what she was going to say. He didn't want to think worse case scenarios but his mind wandered to all of the possibilities it could be, it had even caused him to miss a chord and they had to start the song over.

Once rehearsal had finished, Deacon headed out and waited outside by her car, he wanted to give her some space and not appear as though he was smothering her, still wary that they had only just ventured back into their comfortable rhythm and he didn't want to do anything to ruin it. After 5 minutes or so, he watched her walk out with Bucky who gave her a brief hug before he headed for his car.

'Do you want me to drive or shall I meet you there?' Deacon asked.

'Erm, can you drive?' Rayna suggested even though it would make life harder as he'd have to drive her back rather than going straight home.

'Sure,' Deacon held the door open for Rayna and she climbed into the passenger seat, with a sick feeling in her stomach.

They drove in relative silence, not awkward, but not the most comfortable they'd been recently. Words weren't always necessary when it came to Rayna and Deacon, they could communicate with their eyes, simple hand gestures and body language. They didn't mind sitting in silence as it often involved leaning into one another, or simply enjoying being close to each other which they hadn't had the privilege of doing in the past few years. But there was definitely a feeling of apprehension in the air as Deacon drove them to Percy Warner. He periodically glanced over at Rayna who was staring blankly out of the window, her face solemn as she began fidgeting once again with the hem of her shirt. Screw it, Deacon thought and he reached over and threaded his fingers through hers, giving it a gentle squeeze, nothing more than reassuring he was there for her. He did worry for a split second that she would pull away but she reciprocated by gripping his hand tightly and placing her other on top. Both Rayna and Deacon felt a jolt of electricity at the ever so familiar touch. Neither of them admitted that it was these stolen moments when it was just the two of them, no pretending and hiding deep underlying emotions, no refraining from placing a hand on one another, that were their favourite.

As Deacon pulled the truck on the bridge, he turned his head towards Rayna who had made no attempt to get out of the car and saw tears flowing down her cheeks and her breathing becoming more erratic. His hand immediately was on her face, wiping the tears away, stroking the side of her face with the pads of his finger tips. It was almost as if his touch fueled more tears as Rayna began to cry harder, her hands covering her face while she sobbed into them. The sight broke Deacon's heart. He reached for her and pulled her into a soothing hug, running his hands gently up and down her back while she gripped his flannel shirt and cried into his shoulder. He tried to rock her despite the restriction of being in the car

'Ray, what's going on, baby?' Deacon whispered into her hair, placing kisses on her temple in an attempt to calm her.

Her response was a shaky breath, pulling away yet keeping the grip on his arms. Again, he wiped the stray tears that still fell from her red, puffy eyes while she tried to regain some composure.

'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break down like that, I guess I've been holding it in for a while now.'

'You don't have to apologise to me, you know that.'

The worry yet compassion in his eyes almost caused her to break down again. Only Deacon was able to provide her with a feeling of safety, she was able to be vulnerable with him, she could swim so far into the ocean and he would never let her drown. He was always there to pull her back to shore. Teddy couldn't do that, and they both knew it.

'Do you want to sit on the bench over there?' Deacon asked her, knowing it may be a bit more comfortable than sitting in the car.

'Yeah, ok,' Rayna took a few more deep breaths while Deacon ran around to her side to open the door for her. He took her hand and helped her out but didn't let go as they walked towards the wall. Deacon jumped down first, aiding Rayna whilst she stepped down onto the grass, taking her hand once again. There was something about holding each other's hand that made everything seem like it was going to be ok. Like they were both feeding strength into one another.

They both sat next to each other on the bench, their knees touching. He gave her some time to collect her thoughts, knowing she'd speak when she was ready. That was one thing he'd learned from their relationship, never push Rayna into talking, she'd open up in her own time.

'So I know we agreed we weren't going to talk about Teddy, but this is about him. I just want to warn you,' Rayna spoke quietly, not knowing how Deacon would react hearing her talk about problems between them.

'It's ok, Ray. Whatever you need to talk about, you can. He hasn't cheated on you has he?' That was the first thought that entered his head as soon as she'd mentioned his name. If he had, that bastard better sleep with one eye open because he'd all but kill him.

'No, he hasn't, although it wouldn't surprise me.'

'What do you mean?'

'Teddy wants to have another baby,' He felt like he'd been sucker punched. Whilst there was Maddie, Deacon always held onto a tiny glimmer of hope she'd come back to him, but that felt like an impossibility with another baby. 'He's been on at me for weeks, months even, saying it's time and he wants more than one kid,' Rayna didn't dare look at Deacon, knowing the look that would be plastered on his face.

'And do you not want another baby?' Deacon asked, although he wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer.

'I don't know. I mean I always thought I'd have more than one kid, a house full of laughter and singing but…' she trailed off, not knowing whether she should say what was on the tip of her tongue.

'But what, Rayna?'

'I wanted that with you. I always imagined it would be us, you know. Talking about having a family. It just doesn't feel the same,' He felt tears in his eyes because he'd those thoughts. Deacon simply nodded his head and looked at the ground, trying not to dwell on that too much.

'But you're married and have been for 4 years, you've got Maddie, you seem happy. Why doesn't it feel right?' Deacon knew that Rayna wasn't 100% happy, but she seemed happier than she was towards the end of their relationship when she'd spend the majority of the day nursing him while he was hungover or crying because he hadn't returned home.

'I know, and I love Maddie to pieces. But I don't know if I'm in the right place to bring another baby into the world,' Deacon remained silent while Rayna took a deep breath. It was almost as if he could see a piece of a weight being lifted off her shoulders with each word she spoke.

'Why?' There was no judgement in his voice, just empathy.

'The timing isn't right, we're going on tour,' the only reason she'd given him and he didn't believe that was all it was.

'There's more to it than that Rayna, we're only on tour for 4 months, you could wait until you're back. Surely Teddy can wait another few months?'

'Well yeah, but, things at home have been kinda strained lately and I know i'd be having this baby for the wrong reasons.'

'When you say strained, what do you mean strained?'

'We've been arguing a lot. Fighting more like. He can't see my point of view and…' she felt the tears begin to form, a single one falling onto the tip of her lip. She quickly wiped it away, struggling with how much to reveal. Deacon placed his hand on her knee and gave it a reassuring squeeze, letting her know it was ok. 'He's been saying some not very nice things to me and I could block it out at first, but he keeps saying them and I'm starting to think he's right.'

Deacon could immediately feel the tension in his body building up, his protectiveness towards Rayna was constantly on hyper-alert, and anyone who hurt her he'd be coming for.

'What kind of things has he been saying to you?'

'It started off with things like I'm not committed to him and the family, that's why I don't want to have another baby. Then he's said that I'm a bad Mom because I spend more time singing and I quote 'prancing around on stage' than I do with Maddie. He thinks that you and I are sleeping together and I've been having an affair this whole time, and no matter how many times i tell him it's not true, he doesn't seem to believe me. I think me having another baby is his way of getting me to confirm that I'm over you and it's him I want to be with, I don't know. Last night got pretty intense.'

'Ray, listen to me. You are not a bad mother, you hear me?' He stared directly into her eyes, his own wide, she felt a stab in her heart at how serious he was when he said that, knowing that she needed to hear it. 'You are the best momma that little girl could ask for, she doesn't realise how lucky she is to have you. You've worked so hard to give her this incredible life, all while staying true to yourself and doing what you love. That ain't easy. She adores you, Rayna. I've seen her smile when you walk into the room, you mean everything to her. Don't you ever think for one second that you're not fit to be her momma because you are,' She was surprised with the intensity of emotion that powered through Deacon's voice, close to tears himself.

'Thanks, Deacon. She's my baby, I love her more than anything in this world and the idea that he thinks I'm I don't know neglecting her and I'm not good for her breaks my heart,' she choked on a sob but held back, not wanting to break down a second time.

'What happened last night?' He recalled how she'd said it had gotten intense.

'Huh?'

'You said last night got intense? What did he do?' His hand was still on her knee, and he placed his other on top of hers that was holding onto his fingers.

'Oh, well after Maddie had gone to bed he brought it up again, saying he couldn't understand why I'm so against the idea. Then the usual he accused me of not loving him, I'm still in love with you so I stormed off into the music room because honestly it's like a broken record. I couldn't be bothered to get into the same argument again. So I wrote some stuff down for a song idea but it was getting late so I decided to go to bed. I caught him in the bathroom taking my pills out of the packet and throwing them in the bin, and it looked like he was trying to pierce a hole in a condom or something. Like he believed I'd actually have sex with him after what he'd said.' she laughed slightly, in disbelief more than anything that she was actually having this conversation with Deacon. 'I confronted him because obviously he was trying to get me pregnant without me agreeing to it. But then he got quite aggressive, he threw my perfume bottles across the room, trashed the bathroom and broke the shelves. It was like he was possessed, I've never seen him lose control like that. He's getting obsessed with it Deacon. He actually tried to compromise my birth control, putting a hole in the condom? Who does that?'

'He didn't touch you did he?' That was at the forefront of Deacon's mind, because if he'd laid a hand on Rayna, I'm going to smash that smug son of a bitch's face into a brick wall and stick it where the sun don't shine.'

'No, I could hear Maddie screaming so I ran into her room before he completely lost it. I was scared he would though.'

'Ray, I'm so sorry. He doesn't deserve you, you know that. I know I screwed up bad, that bastard is the luckiest bastard on the planet getting to call you his wife, share a family with you and he's treating you like this? I'd kill to wear that wedding ring on my finger, to go home to you and Maddie every night. He isn't going to get away with this, he isn't taking Maddie form you, I won't let him,' Rayna, even though she expected nothing less, was touched at Deacon's words. She felt incredibly guilty sitting here talking to her ex-lover about problems in her marriage with her husband. But Deacon is the one person on the planet she trusts the most, she couldn't open up to anyone like she could him. 'I don't understand why he thinks we've been having an affair. We hadn't so much as touched each other in years. You're the most loyal person I know.' Deacon continued, there were plenty of times where he wanted to throw caution to the wind and pin Rayna against a wall and kiss her senseless, take her hand and pull her into a closet, make love to her and just straight up fuck her, making her scream. But he knew that it wasn't right, not while she wore another man's ring.

'I know, trust me if I knew I was going to be accused so often I would have just gone and done it,' she wished that hadn't come out of her mouth, admitting she would have had an affair with him. She didn't want to complicate things any further but she had such a sense of freeness about her that she really didn't care what came out of her mouth at that time.

'You saying you still got the hots for me, Ray?' Deacon joked, trying to lighten the mood just for a second.

'I've always had the hots for you Deacon, always will,' she smiled shyly, blushing slightly as she caught his eyes. His eyes had changed from anger to lust and she knew they were about to step foot on a high wire, and probably plunge face first to the ground.

Rayna felt a sudden rush of cold on her knee where his hand had been, he moved it to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, the heel of his hand resting on her cheek. The desire in his eyes as she stared lovingly into them, the eyes of the man she'd loved for over 20 years and was still very much in love with. Deacon cautiously inched his head closer to hers, testing her, ready to pull back at any time. To his delight, he felt her hand snake around his back, landing on the nape of his neck. She was tired of fighting it, the undercurrent between them overpowering, she didn't feel as though she had the mental or emotional strength to refrain any longer, she needed to feel him, be close to him in the way her heart truly desired. She pulled his face closer to hers so they were almost touching, the heat from each other's breaths resonating on each other's lips. It was Rayna who made the first move, her lips brushed his, lightly at first, startled by the contact. She slowly increased the pressure, feeling Deacon respond by shifting her body closer to his. It was the moan that Rayna emitted from her throat when Deacon opened his mouth that tipped him over the edge and they lost themselves in a hungry battle for dominance. Their tongues tangled, demanding entrance to each other's mouths, hands exploring their bodies as they became re-acquainted with the deliciousness of their lips. Rayna groaned with pleasure as Deacon bit down on her bottom lip, one hand running through her hair, the other dangerously close to her breast. They both felt their whole bodies were on fire, not being able to get enough of how good it felt to be kissing each other again. It was better than either of them had dreamt of. Rayna had completely forgotten about any of the conversation she'd just had, just basking in the sensations that Deacon were supplying. They had no idea how long they stayed there, if they were being honest it wasn't long enough.

Deacon reluctantly pulled away, knowing that what just happened shouldn't have, but he also was in no way going to apologise for it.

'I'm sorry,' Rayna spoke first. Her face was flushed, lips swollen and it took him all his strength not to lean in and kiss her again.

'Don't be sorry, that was my fault.'

Realisation dawned on Rayna about her situation. She'd let herself for those few minutes throw Teddy out her mind, allowing herself to be all encompassed by the exquisite sensations that came from kissing Deacon. Her body still on fire and showing no sign of being put out any time soon.

'What am I going to do, Deacon? I don't want to go home, I can't face him. But I need to see Maddie and I don't want her seeing us arguing, not after last night.'

'You can come home with me, Ray. You're staying with me tonight, I'm not letting you go back to him tonight you need a night away.'

'I can't, Deacon. He'd know that I was with you, he'll come looking for me and Maddie and I don't want to give him a reason to take her away from me. I couldn't handle it if I lost her,' Rayna's breathing increasing as the thought of losing Maddie filled her mind.

'Baby, I've told you you're not going to lose her. Tell Teddy you're staying with Tandy tonight, I'll even speak to Tandy. I won't tell her what's going on if you don't want me to but I want to be there for you, look after you and Maddie. Please let me help you,' Deacon pleaded with her and she didn't have it in her to say no. More than that, she didn't want to say no. If anyone could get her through this it was Deacon.

Deacon placed a kiss on the top of Rayna's head before encasing her. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, taking in the musky, masculine smell that she had craved for so long. Everything about being in his arms felt so right. Even though it had resulted from a bad situation, she couldn't help but feel a tiny bit grateful that this had brought her back into Deacon's arms, where she felt safest.

'Let's go home,' With that, Deacon threaded his fingers through Rayna's and guided her back to the car. Making a promise to himself and to her that he would do everything he could to protect her.

She was finally going home.

I have a second chapter written that is set one year later if anyone would be interested.