Trigger Warning: Do not read if you are offended by the word retard or by human trafficking.
Maria stared blankly at professor rowan. "Well, which pokemon do you choose? Chimchar, Turtwig or Piplup?" he asked. "All of them are ugly! I want charizard!" Maria yelled. "But I don't have a chari-" "I want a charizard!" Maria interrupted.
The professor's wizened face looked troubled and he furrowed his brow.
"A Charizard takes a lot of patience and care to raise" He spoke, "It will require a trainer with a pure heart full of courage and compassion."
"I believe that I am the purest of heart. I know it in my bones" Maria said.
"Still, I don't have a charizard." Professor Rowan replied. "Yes you do! I know because I have psychic powers." Maria yelled. "Fine, whatever. You are pure of heart."
Maria snatched the balls from professor rowans' hands and ran out into the brilliant sunlight. The day was clear and calm, with only a few puffy white clouds dotting the late morning sky. The air was fresh and the pidgeys were singing in the distance. Maria stepped onto the path that led out of Fallborrow town.
"I want another pokemon." Maria looked around and instantly saw a Metagross. "I want that one!" The metagross lumbered over toward Maria. Maria tossed a pokeball and caught it. "That was easy! I'm a great trainer."
The orb shook once, twice, and suddenly-
The catch was instant!
The day passed without much more fanfare or pomp. Indeed, it seemed to have been a completely normal day in the Unova region.
Actually, Maria lived in the Sinnoh region.
Maria realized that the trees were shifting around her and the world seemed to tunnel in on a single point in the centre of her view. Her psychic powers had alerted her to the location of a strange looking man in a black coat. He stood next to a retarded looking tree, or a Soodowoodo to Johtoians.
It was the sinnoh region, you idiot!
Don't get your fucking pants stuck up your uptight ass. I'm taking a few creative liberties.
Maria stared at the retarded tree. "I want that pokemon too! Give me your pokemon or else mister!"
The man stared blankly at Maria. He began to speak in a mystic and foreign tongue.
"¿Cuál es el problema de esta chica?" The man said in confusion. He obviously didn't understand humanspeak.
"I said give me your damn pokemon or else!" Maria yelled at the man.
"Estoy empezando a sentirme amenazado por tu tono." The man said, once again in his mysterious and archaic language. He looked from side to side nervously.
Maria glared at him angrily. "Give me you pokemon idiot! And speak americanish!" Maria tossed a pokeball at the man's pokemon.
The man swiftly blocked Maria's ball with his hand. He glared daggers at Maria and pulled out a 9mm handgun.
"Estás tratando de robar mi propiedad. No tengo más remedio que comprometerme con la fuerza letal." The man shouted. He looked angry, but what was troubling him, Maria had no idea.
"You're not even speaking a real language! That's my Pokemon! Give me my pokemon!"
The man's retarded tree stood in front of the man protectively. It raised its arms and let out a cry that expressed feelings of rage and retardation.
Maria sent out charizard. "Charizard! Use Prismatic laser!" The charizard shoots powerful lasers using the power of a prism.
Using his vast reserves of power, Charizard began to suck in energy from Earth's yellow sun. His mouth began to glow with psionic energy as he unleashed a powerful beam of pure power. The retarded tree was instantly vaporized in a cloud of rocks, trees, and ozone.
You idiot! I already described the move!
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
…why?
The strange man looked on in shock and horror as his beloved tree with mental handicaps was obliterated under the sheer power of that cursed beam. Ash coated his shoulders as the full effects of the nuclear fallout began to set in. His skin turned green and he began to mutate before Maria's eyes.
"Wow, you sure are ugly!" said Maria who was miraculously unaffected by the radiation.
She could almost hear holy music playing as she walked away from the man's smoldering corpse. Then, Mew descended from heaven and gave her a prophecy.
"You, my child, are the chosen one of destiny." Mew spoke, "You will have to save the planet, and indeed, the very universe itself. Dark forces are at play, and only you can defeat them. Beware the organization with the stars and stripes!"
"Yeah, yeah, just get in the ball." Maria threws a pokeball at Mew.
End of chapter 1. We hope you liked it.
(PyrothePokefan14 and SmexySlugma)