A/N: Hello there! :) This is the third 'entry' in my Captain's Log series, a Kirk/OC story, Veritas et Fortitudo (Truth and Courage) :) It's certainly been a LONG time coming and I'm so sorry for the delay in getting this posted, life is complicated and sometimes it hates you and just wants to kick you when you think you're getting back on track :/ But it's finally here! :D I'd recommend new readers check out the first two 'entries,' Ad Victoriam and Amor Vincit Omnia, to understand the relationship that Victoria (the OC) has with Kirk ;) This story will be about 10 chapters long, updated 3x a week (usually M/W/F), and will largely follow the 'Beyond' movie.

A quick description of Victoria Pike, she's a tall woman with blue-grey eyes (her father's eyes), but her mother's dark, ash-blonde hair. She's got a sort of button nose and a wide grin, according to Kirk. She tends to wear her hair in a messy bun and is typically in the red engineering uniform for the Fleet. To help visualize her, an actress that I picture as being similar to her is Carey Mulligan :)

I hope you all enjoy :)

~8~ is a scene break

Disclaimer...I don't own Star Trek...or we'd have a 4th movie by now ;)

~8~

Stuck in the Middle

Victoria sighed as she half leaned on the controls in the teleportation room, sitting in a chair, bored, waiting for Kirk to finish his meeting with the Teenaxi Delegation. She should have been on the Bridge, being the liaison for Engineering, but Spock was First Officer and he could handle it there, she wasn't really needed, they weren't doing anything but hovering in space, waiting. And, truly, if she was in that room a second longer, staring at yet another planet they were floating around for a mission, she might just scream. She'd take the blank walls and mindless button pushing of the teleporter than that right now.

And, if she was being honest with herself, it had half to do with Kirk also. She wanted to be the one manning the controls for his teleport when he finished, to be the first one he'd see and greet when he got back. It was...one of the few things they could allow, a small consolation and as much of a stretch as they were willing to allow. She was worried, too. He had looked…she couldn't really find a word to describe how he'd looked before he'd gone down to the Teenaxi after meeting with the Fobonane Republic, she only knew that she probably looked much the same. The expression on his face, the look in his eyes, she saw in the mirror every day for…she couldn't count how long now. She knew how she felt, she could guess how Kirk might be feeling, but they both hadn't really talked about it either.

She jerked a bit, when the comm. crackled and Kirk's voice came through, "My name is Captain James Tiberius Kirk, United Federation of Planets," she straightened up in her seat a bit more, rubbing the side of her face where it had been pressed to her fist while she'd waited, now that Kirk was being presented to the Teenaxi, she should pay more attention, "I'm appearing before you as a neutral representative of the Fobonane Republic. I bring you a message of goodwill and present to you, esteemed members of the Teenaxi Delegation, a gift from the Fobonane High Council with the highest regard."

She gave a small smile at his speech, hearing Spock's rigidity for politics and diplomacy in every word. It was a bittersweet smile though, on one hand it meant things were likely to go well and without much issue if he stuck to the script Spock prepared, he'd be safe. But, on the other hand, it was just another sign that things were wrong with Kirk. He never would have been so formal, he would have put his own flourish on it. Right now he sounded both resigned and tired as he spoke, like he was truly reciting a script instead of actually wanting to be there to broker this peace. It was worrying, to her, to hear him like that, he always had such fire and passion and she'd noticed him struggling to bring that out in certain areas lately.

The smile turned a bit pleased for just a moment, he never struggled to do that with her, but there were other areas, areas a captain of a vessel had to manage where he did.

She was just as guilty though. She'd gotten more than enough worried glances from Uhura, Scotty, and Bones to know she likely had been giving off the same feels.

"What's wrong with it?" a croaking voice asked, pulling her back to the current situation, one of the Teenaxi speaking.

"…excuse me?" Kirk responded.

"Why don't they want it anymore?"

"Well, this was once a piece of an ancient weapon but now they offer it as a symbol of…of peace. In the Fobonane culture to surrender a weapon is an offer of truce."

"How did they come by it?"

"Oh, this isn't good," she muttered to herself, hearing an edge growing in the Teenaxi's voice that set HER on edge, too.

It seemed Kirk was aware of that also, his response very careful and cautious, "They told me they acquired it a long time ago."

"Oh James…" she winced, not needing to know much of the Teenaxi to guess how that response would go down.

"So they stole it then!" the Teenaxi accused, just as she feared.

"No!" Kirk tried to salvage it, "They...um…well…"

"You don't know the Fobonanes, like we do!"

"Yeah, that's…that's very true."

"Get back on track, James," she spoke to herself as though he could hear her.

"Your Excellency, this gift..." Kirk did just that, despite the comms. on their end being muted so as not to distract him or have the Teenaxi suspect he was being deceitful.

"They are crowds of untrustworthy thieves who want to see us murdered in our own beds!" the Teenaxi accused.

"What?" she scoffed, that was just taking things a bit far…

Kirk sighed, "This beloved artifact is a symbol of trust and peace."

"They will chop us into pieces, and roast us over a fire..." the Teenaxi continued.

"I don't think that's true..."

Victoria sighed, starting to begin the sequence on the controls that would beam Kirk back, even though she had no visual of him and wasn't there, she could tell this was going down a bad path to failure.

"And eat us!"

"What?" Kirk repeated her own sentiments, before letting out a startled cry of pain, "Scotty," he shouted, opening the comms., "Get me out of here!"

"I'm offended you think I'm Scotty, James," Victoria remarked, halfway through the sequence already.

"What, Victoria!?" he cut in, "What are you…ow! Get off! Look, just get me out of here!"

"I'm trying," she warned him, "There's a lot of surface interference…" she probably should have started the sequence earlier, like when he first began talking.

"Tory!" he shouted, near panicked, right as she hit a button and activated the transport, Kirk appearing on the teleport pad not a moment later in a flash of light.

"Jim!" she huffed, hurrying over when she saw him struggling with two of the Teenaxi that had latched onto him and decided to go along for the ride. She was able to pull one off, another of the crew coming in to help assist and run analysis on the teleport, as they did after each mission, hurrying to help her. She handed the one she'd grabbed over to the second analysist and moved over to Kirk to check on him.

"I ripped my shirt again," Kirk huffed, dropping his forehead onto her shoulder the second she was near enough, a bone deep weariness in his voice as he wound his arms around her loosely.

"And not in the good way," Victoria teased, feeling him turn his head to smile into her neck at the memory of one time where a shirt might have been ripped when certain passions had run a little high...

"No, not in the good way," he chuckled, before hissing when her finger brushed along a scratch on his back where the shirt had been ripped.

"This one looks deep, James," she warned.

"It's fine," he pulled away.

"Maybe…" she shifted.

He glanced around, seeing they were alone, that the two analysts had carted the Teenaxi away first, giving them some privacy, before he reached out to cup her face in his hands, smiling at her softly, "I don't need the med-bay," he assured her, knowing how much she hated that part of the ship herself and how it conflicted with her wanting him to get checked out and cleared and get something to help the scratch. If it had really been bad she would have dragged him there kicking and screaming and shoved him into it...and then waited outside on the benches till he was finished. Since she hadn't, he assumed it really wasn't that bad, "I'll check in with Bones though."

She bit her lip, fighting a smile now, "He must have quite a lot of that salve on hand then."

He smirked, recalling the ointment Bones had taken to keeping in the med-bay (and his room) for scratches. It had become a running joke with them, for him to stop by Bones' room twice a month or so and ask for more of the cream. The look on the man's face when he had to hand it over was priceless. And really, it was only the first time that Victoria's nails dug a bit too deep into his back that required him to seek out Bones on the sly for some help. It was just that the man's face was hysterical and they loved to torment him with the thought of why they needed so much of the salve so often.

They had enough of it stockpiled away, but this would give them another excuse to see Bones' face twist in an 'I don't need to know this!' way when he wasn't officially giving a medical exams in the med-bay.

Victoria glanced at his shirt as she stepped back, hearing muffled voices outside the door and assuming the analysts were about to return, frowning when she saw a tear in the front as well though without any scratch marks, and back at him, "Didn't go so well then?" she asked.

He sighed, dropping his hands from her face to take one of hers in his, heading for the door to the hall, he didn't even get a chance to answer before he nearly walked right into Spock and Bones, waiting for him.

"Captain," Spock gave a brief nod, turning to walk with Kirk and Victoria down the hall, "Did you manage to broker treaty with Teenaxi?"

Kirk batted away the small handheld scanner Bones kept trying to shove in his face as they went, replying, "Eh...let's just say I came up short. Could you uh…" he tossed the small box with the ancient circular gear thing the Fobonane Republic had given as their gift to Spock, "Log that and put it in the vault, Spock? Thank you. Ow! Bones!" he spun around when he felt a poke at the scratch on his back.

"Jim, you look like crap," Bones got right to it.

Kirk gave him an unamused expression, "Thank you, Bones."

"You've got that little vein popping out your temple again, you ok?"

"Never better," Kirk sighed, "It's just another day in the Fleet."

Victoria smirked, leaning into him and winding an arm around his waist, something she only did in front of the crew when it was Bones and she wanted to mess with him, "Give me five minutes with him and I'll have him looking much different."

Kirk just barely managed to keep his laughter in when Bones choked on air at the words, "Only five?"

"You look like you're ready to keel over," she shrugged, "And you're getting on up there in age…"

"I'll show you 'getting on up there,'" he muttered, quickly twisting and ducking down to throw her over his shoulder as she laughed, carrying her down the hall to their rooms while Bones just pressed his face into his palm and shook his head, turning to go, grumbling about dropping off some salve outside their door as he went.

~8~

Victoria laid on her side in bed, on her elbow, her head propped up on her hand, as she watched Kirk, a towel around his waist from his shower, moving to his closet to lay out his clothing for the morning, the man staring at all the identical gold shirts, before he sighed and picked one to go lay it over the chair where her own red dress was set out with her boots on the floor beside it. He picked up a small device on the desk and clicking it on.

"Captain's Log," he began, making his recording for the day, "Stardate…"

Victoria smiled when he looked over at her for that, knowing she had always been the more precise one when it came to dates and times. She wouldn't make it that easy for him though, so she held up 2 fingers, then 2 again, then 6, then 3, and another 2.

"2263.2," Kirk winked at her, continuing, "Today is our 966th day in deep space," he gave a long sigh at that, moving to sit on the edge of the bed she was facing, "A little under three years into our five-year mission. The more time we spend out here," he absently reached out to take her hand, fiddling with it as he spoke, "The harder it is to tell where one day ends and the next one begins. It can be a challenge to feel grounded when even gravity is artificial. But, well, we do what we can to make it feel like home," he looked over at her, smiling at her softly, "The crew, as always, continues to act admirably despite the rigors of our extended stay here in outer space. And the personal sacrifices they have made," his eyes drifted shut when she let go of his hand to reach up and lightly touch his cheek, her thumb stroking over his cheekbone, "We continue to search for new life forms in order to establish firm diplomatic ties. Our extended time in uncharted territory has stretched the ship's mechanical capacities. But, fortunately, our engineering department," his smile turned into a smirk as he opened his eyes, "Led by Mr. Scott," he stifled a laugh when she rolled her eyes and pulled her hand away to whack him on the shoulder for not including HER in his log given how much more often she was called to the engine room to assist Scotty recently, "Is more than up to the job. The ship aside, prolonged cohabitation has definitely had effects on interpersonal dynamics," he waggled his eyes at her, looking her up and down along the sheets she was under, knowing she wasn't wearing much underneath, "Some experiences for the better," he nodded to himself, grinning, and she reached out to grab his pillow, whacking him with it, "And some for the worse," he teased, managing to tug the pillow from her when she tried a second blow, "As for me…" he hesitated and Victoria stilled, her expression growing more serious at how he was trying to pick his words, before he sighed, knowing, if there was one person he could be this honest with it would be her, "The farther out we go, the more I find myself wondering what it is we're trying to accomplish?" he admitted to the log, though his eyes were locked on her as though confessing something, "If the universe is truly endless then are we not striving for something forever out of reach?" he shook his head, getting back to point, feeling like he'd said too much, to the log, not to Victoria, never to her, "The Enterprise is scheduled for a reprovisioning stop at Yorktown, the Federation's newest and most advanced starbase. Perhaps a break from routine will offer up some respite from the mysteries of the unknown. End Log," he waited till the device clicked off before he turned to face the wall.

Victoria shifted up on the bed so she was sitting, almost curled around his back as she moved to drape her arms over his shoulders, hugging him from behind, "You're not the only one," she told him.

His head twisted to the side so fast he nearly hit his nose to hers had she not jerked back slightly, "Really?"

She gave him a sad smile, knowing this talk was long overdue, "You know I haven't always been…invested in being part of the Fleet," she reminded him.

And she hadn't. Or at least she kept going back and forth about it. It started off an excited dream to join Starfleet. But then it devolved into more of a family legacy handed down that she'd felt obligated to take up, with only a part of her actually wanting it. She'd managed to find things to love along the way, friends, someone more than a friend, things to be interested in, things to learn and do. And Kirk was always coming up with new ideas and maneuvers and things that kept her on her toes. It was all new and wonderful and exciting again.

…but then they'd nearly lost everything, and her father died, killed by Khan, and things began to change after that, it was like she was reminded of all the things the Fleet could take away from a person too.

She'd felt that obligation more firmly than ever, that she HAD to stay, had to live up to his legacy, had to make him proud and keep to the Fleet and honor his memory.

And Kirk, even HE had begun to change after what happened with Khan.

He had disobeyed the Fleet's policy and, as a result, lost his rank, lost his crew, lost the chance to head up the five year mission into deep space. His choices had far-reaching consequences that had deeply affected him. Ever since then, since being given the second chance as Captain of the Enterprise, he'd been more rule abiding, not wanting to risk the loss of the mission, not wanting to fail his crew or endanger them as he had before, not wanting to risk punishment by the Fleet and have his ship taken from him, there was likely no other captain out there willing to argue on his behalf after Pike passed. At some point it had gotten worse, monotonous, no adventure, no stretching the rules, nothing new, just the Fleet's policy without compromise or deviation.

They'd both fallen into a funk when it came to the Fleet, living day after day the same, with the same clothes and the same people and the same stars near enough, they all looked the same after a while. There was no adventure, nothing done without the Fleet's permission, no rescuing civilizations or bending the rules.

It was hard for them both. Even in the Academy they had both been rule breakers and trouble makers, constantly in detention and one step away from suspension or expulsion. They fed off each other in that sense, getting into trouble for each other, in defense of each other, partnering with each other. When Vulcan had been attacked, they hadn't been part of the crew but stowaways in a sense, they hadn't cared for the rules. Then when they'd been assigned the Enterprise, they'd continued that behavior, helping each other bend and break the rules, for the thrill of it, the adventure, the danger and excitement.

Their behavior, both of them, had consequences. Kirk had lost control of the ship, and her father had died. If they had never done what they had, maybe her father wouldn't have been part of the meeting called to talk about Khan since he wouldn't have been an active Captain, if he hadn't had to resume control of the Enterprise...maybe he'd still be alive. They both had sworn to be more careful, not just in what they did but in how they acted. Captains and other crew members were allowed inter-ship relationships, but they were expected to remain professional while on duty.

It had cut into them both deeply, to have to force that large part of their relationship down, to keep it locked away, to keep so much of who THEY were as people stamped down. They didn't bicker, they didn't flirt, they hardly ever touched. He was 'Captain Kirk' and she was 'Liaison Pike' while out among the crew, they upheld their roles and duties, and it felt like the more they did so the more something was just...lost...between them, strained, stretched, and to think of enduring 2 more years of it all was heartbreaking.

"I…" Victoria hesitated, "I only really stay because of you," she admitted to him, "And some of our friends. But…" she gave him a guilty shrug, "I...it's not that I don't want to be here, it's just…sometimes, I wonder, where I'd be if I could choose what I want. If that makes sense."

Kirk nodded slowly, "If this is what you want to be doing for the next two years," he agreed, that was how he felt too.

"So what do we do?" she asked.

He let out a long sigh, twisting to sit more on the bed to face her as she sat against the backboard, "I don't know," he admitted, looking at her for a long while.

There was…something he wanted to do, but that would mean bringing up another part of his discontent with the current situation. He knew how Victoria felt about the Fleet, her choice in the matter, and there was something he very much wanted to do but...Victoria deserved better than for him to do it now and have to wait another two years to actually DO it. But a part of him didn't think he could make it another two years without doing it either.

It began to feel more and more like they would have to leave the ship, if not the Fleet, but that was not a discussion to have when they were both feeling this lag and resignation and discontent. They needed to have a breath of fresh air, a bit of time away, really be in better spirits and clearer heads than to make any decisions now when they were in the middle of being unhappy with a situation they had a responsibility to see through.

"We're heading to Yorktown," he remarked, "A bit of shore leave might do us some good."

Victoria smiled, though it was teasing, "Are you asking me on a date, James?"

"I DO owe you that drink," he chuckled, teasing her about how she always used to tell him he had to buy her a drink first when he'd joke with her about them dating or being more than friends. He felt himself smile again, she always had that way of bringing them out of him. They both had forced themselves to be so rigid around the crew, distant and professional, not letting their personal relationship reflect in their working relationship...which meant this, here, in their room, was the only time they had to just be THEM, be James and Victoria instead of Captain Kirk and Liaison Pike. He wasn't going to pass up any chance to rekindle the flame that had always been between them, "I think we've gone way past dating, Victoria," he added, a little more seriously, they'd come a long way in the last near-3 years.

She bit her bottom lip in a way she knew made him want to kiss her, and looked down his body to the towel wrapped around him, "Have we?" she moved her gaze back to his eyes, "From where I'm sitting, we haven't reached the bed yet."

He grinned, lunging forward to kiss her, half taking her with him to lie down on the bed with a giggle he quickly cut off.

A moment later his towel went flying across the room.

~8~

Kirk looked up from where he was drinking a glass of alcohol in a lounge type room of the ship when Bones walked in. He frowned, leaning slightly to the side as though to try and peer around the man but Bones only rolled his eyes at the action.

"Vicky isn't coming," he told Kirk before he could be asked, "Keenser's leaking some kind of highly acidic green goo and Scotty's terrified he's gonna sneeze on the warp core and kill us all so she had to stay down in Engineering to make sure we don't die."

He honestly would have been a little concerned about Kirk and Victoria and how many would call their relationship codependent over the last few years, had he not known their personalities as well as he had. He had noticed, being the resident doctor and in charge of everyone's wellbeing and health, both physical and mental, that Kirk had been displaying signs of a depression. Not quite a full blown one, but a lack of interest, a despondency, almost a resignation, that the man was struggling to even seem engaged at times…

Unless Victoria was there.

Then he'd perk up, he'd be more active, smile more, laugh more, but it still wasn't quite what it used to be.

Victoria was the same though she hid it better than Kirk did, likely, he thought, out of her intense hatred of the med-bay. She'd do absolutely anything, act any way she had to, to not be classified as needing medical assistance, even if it meant covering up her own depression symptoms where he could see them. When Kirk was there, it was like they boosted each other up, like they were magnets that only worked well when they were together.

He had even had a few people come to him with concerns that the captain and engineering liaison were too codependent on each other to do their jobs. He'd mostly rolled his eyes and sent them on their way, casting it off as those few crew members who wanted to get ahead and saw Victoria or Kirk as standing in their way to that. There weren't may of them, he could count them on one hand really. Mostly because he had the sense that those people didn't actually understand what codependency was.

Both Kirk and Victoria were able to fully function when the other wasn't there, they didn't hinge anything on the other's opinion unless it was something specific about their relationship or a decision that could affect it, which was normal. Neither of them enabled the other, in fact they probably fought more against what the other did or planned to do than not. They could stand against each other, they didn't manipulate the other, they didn't rely on the other for everything. They could survive and think on their own and without the other, they were just in a normal relationship.

The only worrying part, to him, was how he saw the both of them a little unhappy and despondent unless they were together, in which case they were only slightly less unhappy and despondent, but it wasn't like they saw each other and the sun came out or something. The part that worried him was that, even together, there was still that note of depression in both of them. Sometimes it was hard to spot, because they both took great care to be professional while on duty, not allowing their problems to interfere with their jobs. It was the times when they were off-duty, but together, when he really noticed it, because they just...weren't acting the same.

He was used to them bickering, fighting, flirting, teasing each other, shooting barbs and witty retorts, being physically close and affectionate. He was used to them smiling and laughing and playing off each other. To Victoria tempting Kirk and to Kirk eyeing Victoria when she wasn't looking. But now? When on duty, they were the epitome of professionalism. Off duty, when he could see them at least, there was still that caution and distance. It wasn't their relationship causing their distance, he knew that, they weren't drifting apart or having trouble in paradise. There was still that softness and love in their eyes and actions around each other, it was just muted.

At first he'd been thrilled to not have to worry he'd walk into the Bridge and see Victoria sitting on Kirk's lap on the Captain's Chair, or enter the dining hall and see them jokingly feeding each other, or open a storage closet and find them making out like teenagers as they had before they'd been assigned the 5 year mission. But if he was being honest, he'd rather that than what he saw in them both now.

It was worrying him.

Times like these he almost wished Carol had stayed on and not departed at their first reprovisioning their first year out, not having been able to handle being in the blackness of space and staring down another 4 years of it. They'd parted ways amicably, but she'd been good friends with both Kirk and Victoria and he knew she'd be the first one jumping up to help him had she been there, she'd be the only one who would probably notice the signs something was off like he was.

Finding Kirk drinking while he was still technically on duty was a sign of something, but, he reasoned, they were also nearing Yorktown and would be on shore leave for a bit so he let it slide.

"What the hell are you drinking?" he asked as he came to sit before Kirk.

"Uh, I'm pretty sure it's the rest of that Saurian brandy we picked up on Thasus," Kirk eyed the near empty bottle.

"My God, man are you trying to go blind?" Bones hissed, "That stuff's illegal! Besides…" he smirked, "I found this in Chekov's locker," he held up his own bottle of alcohol he'd brought with him.

"Wow," Kirk reached out to eye it.

"Right? I mean I always assumed he'd be a vodka man."

"A vodka guy, exactly."

"I wanted to have something appropriate for your birthday."

Kirk gave him a look, brushing it off, "That's in a couple days. You know I don't care about that."

Bones gave him a look, "I know. I know you don't like celebrating it on the day because it's also the day your pa bit the dust. I was being sensitive."

"Did they teach you about bedside manner in medical school? Or is it just your southern charm?"

"You think Tory isn't going to do something?" Bones continued, ignoring him as he poured some of his bottle into a few glasses.

"She won't," Kirk shook his head, lifting his glass to sniff it, "She knows how I feel."

Bones scoffed, "Says the man who made us fly the ship to a star on the cusp of being born just for her birthday?"

They tapped their glasses on a third glass, empty, meant to be Victoria's on the table, before they tapped each others and downed them in one gulp.

"Oh yeah," Kirk sighed, ignoring Bones this time, "That's good."

"Jim…"

"Look," Kirk looked at him, "She knows how I feel about it because of my dad. If she does anything, it'll be between the two of us," he trailed off a moment, considering what she'd done for him last year and smiled, that had been what had triggered his thoughts on a few things going forward. He'd walked into their bedroom to just…a nice dinner, that she'd made herself, complete with his favorite pie, and not from the portions they served everyone, but things she'd made with her own two hands. It was just them, eating his favorite foods from Earth, and he loved it.

She'd asked him what he wanted for his birthday, he'd only said 'you.'

Which had led to some quite mind-blowing events and cold leftover food and they may have almost set fire to the room by forgetting to blow out the one candle she'd had burning for ambiance at the table.

But he hadn't been completely honest, or at least not very clear on what he meant. He did want Victoria, he had her, that was all he ever wanted for his birthday and many more to come, but…there was another aspect of Victoria he wanted to himself that he hadn't had the nerve or even conscious thought to ask her then.

"Uh huh," Bones shrugged, "Are you gonna call your mom then?"

"Yeah, of course," Kirk nodded, though it was distant, almost sounding like he was dreading the idea, "I'll call her on the day."

Bones eyed him a moment at the sound, he didn't seem very eager for it and he knew Kirk loved his mother dearly.

It was just…he'd gotten something from his mother a very long time ago and each time he called her, she asked him the same question about if he'd used it, and she always sounded so let down when he said no. Knowing what he did now, about what he wanted to do and knowing he couldn't do it, having to tell her no again felt that much heavier.

"I'm one year older," he remarked, shaking his head.

"Yep that's usually how it works," Bones said slowly.

"A year older than he ever got to be," he mused, a year older than when his father had gotten to be, a year older than when the man had had a newborn son, a year older than when George Kirk had a wife and a child and a future to have…and he had none of that, "He joined Starfleet because he...he believed in it. I joined on a dare."

"You joined to see if you could live up to him," Bones corrected, "Same with Tory, I think," he reminded the man, "You both signed up for your fathers, to make them proud, but now they're um, gone, and it's just you and…" he took a breath, letting it out, starting to work out a little bit of the depression he'd seen in them, "Uh, you both spent all this time trying to be better than your dads and now you're wondering just what it means to be Jim and Vicky."

"Are we?" Kirk asked, looking at Bones, though he doubted Bones would understand the question and the numerous layers to it. On one hand, how could they learn to be Jim and Tory, when it felt like nearly every second of the day was them being Captain and Liaison. On the other hand...

"Yeah," Bones nodded, giving Kirk a smug look, that he was sure the alcohol from before was getting to him finally, "I'm pretty sure everyone on this ship knows you're Jim and Vicky."

"No," Kirk shook his head, because he was right, Bones hadn't gotten it, "Are we Jim and Tory? Because, right now, we're just Jim…and…Tory."

Bones' expression morphed into worry, "Exactly how much of that did you drink before I walked in?"

"No," Kirk huffed, Bones STILL wasn't getting it, "I'm Jim, and she's Tory. Jim Kirk. Tory Pike. We're not Jim and Tory. We're not Tory and Jim Kirk."

Bones, who had been halfway to lifting his second glass to his mouth, gave him an odd look. The way Kirk was staring back at him made him feel like the man genuinely thought that what he'd said made any sort of sense. But to him it was just the man repeating the same thing four different ways, "How much DID you drink?" he repeated, because he might have to figure out a way to get Kirk back to his room to try and sleep off the alcohol than risk letting him command the Bridge in this state.

Before Kirk could even respond, his comm. beeped, reminding them of his official duty as captain, "Kirk here," he answered instinctively, shooting Bones a look at the man's wide-eyed expression.

"Captain," Sulu came on, "Approaching Yorktown Base."

Kirk rubbed a hand down his face, "I'm on my way, Mr. Sulu," he clicked the comm. off and turned to Bones, patting him on the shoulder as he nearly stumbled to the door, the alcohol hitting him now, "Let's keep this birthday thing under wraps huh?"

Bones let out a scoffing breath, "Yeah," he agreed, "You know me. Mr. Sensitive."

He kept a close eye on Kirk as they headed for the Bridge, if he got caught being even slightly drunk while on duty there would be hell to pay from Victoria, though he wasn't sure how well his plan to keep that part 'under wraps' would work, Kirk was an affectionate drunk. And Victoria was often the object of his affections.

By the time they reached the Bridge, Kirk had seemed to sober up enough to at least pass as sober, maybe the sense of duty had gotten through the alcohol, but whatever it was Bones kept watch on him as they saw Yorktown approaching in the window.

"Wow," Chekov whistled, "Zat is impressive."

"She is a masterpiece," Victoria remarked, having come up to the Bridge when it became clear either her or Scotty would have to take Keenser to the med-bay and the other to the Bridge. Given her status as the literal Liaison to the Bridge and her own phobia of the med-bay, Scotty had taken that short straw.

She looked over when Kirk stepped to her side and draped an arm around her shoulder, almost leaning on her as he looked out at the base, not even seeming to realize he'd done it. It had been more than he'd done when the other crew were around to see in a very long time.

"What a damn monstrosity!" Bones grumbled, "Couldn't we just rent some space on a planet?"

"Showing geographical favoritism among inducted Federation worlds could cause diplomatic tension," Spock remarked.

"Oh, you don't think that looks tense?" Bones gestured aggressively at the window, "Looks like a damn snow globe in space just waiting to break!"

"Oh, that's the spirit, Bones," Kirk laughed, patting the man on the shoulder with his free hand.

It took Victoria less than a minute around Kirk to work out the fact that he was buzzed, and if it hadn't been for how comfortable he was in being this close to her among the crew when they worked so hard to keep things professional, or the way he had turned his head to nuzzle his nose to her temple while everyone else was fixated on the base, it would be the alcohol she could smell on his breath.

She turned and shot a glare at Bones that had him hurrying out of the room.

…maybe he should go hide out in the med-bay, she couldn't get him there.

A/N: Surprise! :) I just finished my OUAT Gold/OC story, just posted the last chapter an hour or two ago, and thought I'd keep the momentum going and post the first chapter of my next story too :)

Just putting it out there that, contrary to my other Star Trek story, Victoria is NOT pregnant and won't be pregnant in this story ;)

I imagine, with the tech available, she probably has a sort of 5-year birth control because, come on, you can't tell me the Fleet hasn't thought about the relationships likely to escalate in close quarters for FIVE years and planned ahead for that. I don't think they'd make it a requirement, but they'd probably encourage both men and women to take precautions because you can't have a baby on board for a five year mission which means the parents both leave to go to a base or something and lose their chance at the mission. At least in this story ;) Victoria was a child on many starships, but I also imagine they were ones designated for specific missions and areas of space where it would be safe for a child to be on board. I don't doubt that there could have been children on the Enterprise, but probably not during the 5-year mission type thing.

We're going to see a very different Kirk and Victoria than we've seen in the last two stories. They went from bickering and fighting in the first, to flirting and sweet in the second, to...this. The events with Khan really impacted them in many ways, and it's going to put a real strain on them as people in this story for a while :( But I feel like it was needed, to explore this side of them and the consequences of the strain and pressure we put on ourselves. They're taking action to try and prevent something, and in doing so it's sort of hurting another aspect of their lives. I look forward to exploring how they eventually cope with and move on from the things hanging over them :)

Lastly, just putting this here because I've promised my sister I would always put it in at least one chapter, I made a page called ko-fi, where people can show support of a person by contributing a 'cup of coffee' to them. It's not a real cup of coffee, it's a donation that is roughly the cost of a cup of coffee, or about 3 dollars. The link is up on my profile or on my tumblr's LINKS page if anyone is interested. There's no obligation, requirement, or commitment, it just sort of feels to me like a little 'let's talk about your work over a cup of coffee' ;) They should really make one for tea though, I love tea :)

Some notes on reviews...(from the end of Amor Vincit Omnia)...

Just starting by saying I'm SO sorry it took so long to get this story up :( I know the 3rd movie has been out for a while now and I was so touched to see so many people were interested in the next story in the series. Life just kept getting in the way and each time I thought I'd reached a good place to come back and update it would kick me down again :/ A lot happened beyond the mess that was 2021 but I finally got to a stable place with life and I've been updating consistently (not as frequently as I'd like but I'm working on it ;)) and I was focusing on completing my unfinished stories and then trying to wrap up a few other series. But I really wanted to get to Beyond for Victoria and we've finally made it! :D I hope you all enjoy the story :)

Yup, Kirk and Victoria are finally really together :) Here they are almost 3 years into the 5 year mission so they've had a long time to get to a very good place in their relationship ;)

Oh yes, we'll be getting a Bones/OC probably...next year? If everything pans out because I'll have both Star Trek series caught up and can start working on Bones :)

I'm not sure if there'll be another Jim/OC story, I try to never say never so it could happen one day if an OC pops out at me :) If not, I might have a spin-off planned of rewriting the entire Star Trek show to incorporate Victoria into it so we might get a little more of Kirk/Victoria if I manage that :)

That's perfectly understandable :) The first story in most of my movie-stories is usually half original to really build up and show the foundation of the relationship between the OC and the character they're paired with and, from then, I try to see how things might change or be interpreted differently with an OC there too. The stories after the first usually try to blend original scenes with parts of the movie so it's less entire chapters that are original and more many parts of the chapters that fit them in. It may not always work and so I completely get your preference for the first story in the series :)