Snips . . . snails . . . and puppy dog tails . . . . These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little boys. But, Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction; Chemical X. Thus the Rowdyruff Boys were born! Using their ultra super powers, Brick, Boomer, and Butch have dedicated their lives to fighting crime and the forces of evil!
Mojo Jojo relished the screams rising all around him. The beautiful sound of a car exploding hit his ears. He couldn't contain a laugh of joy. He pointed his huge, red laser gun at a bus and it went up in flames. Citizens ran away from it, screaming. One shot from the laser beam destroyed an entire building. Mojo obliterated a statue of the Mayor on a rearing horse. He turned and razed a row of buildings along the street. As the dust cleared, Mojo cackled, the city burning behind him.
Three brightly colored streaks; red, blue, and green, raced past him, cutting off his moment of victory. Mojo glared at the candy-colored streaks flying through the air and shot at them. They barely dodged. Brick dodged and shot a red laser out of his eyes. The beam hit its target. Mojo's laser gun melted between his fingers. He stared at it in horror.
He braced himself for the pain of a punch in the face from Butch, knowing he was defeated. "Curse you- . . ." He was punched in the back by Boomer next. "Rowdyruff Boys!"
Brick finished him off with one more punch to the jaw.
Mojo Jojo went through the motions for the hundredth time, screaming in fury. Handcuffs. Mug shot. Fingerprints. Thrown into a cell. He raced at the door as it slammed and gripped the bars, growling incomprehensibly.
His time in prison was always worth it to get out and create more mayhem. Mojo Jojo sat in his newest weapon of mass destruction; the top of his observatory, equipped with flight jets and a laser beam. Smoke rose from the city around him as he giggled with glee. Mojo noticed some fighter jets rapidly approaching. He looked through the telescope to see missile launchers on the ground, ready to fire, and tanks rumbling through the street. The jets, launchers, and tanks shot their missiles and projectiles all at once. Mojo operated the controls and zapped every missile and bomb, causing them to explode harmlessly a safe distance away. Mojo laughed at his victory.
The dreaded sound hit his ears. He stopped in the middle of his cackle and gripped the screen, staring at three colored streaks straight across it. He looked through the telescope, searching frantically for his arch nemeses. Boomer appeared right in front of the telescope. He followed Boomer as he flew around the dome and flew away. He spotted a streak of blue and followed it up and over the dome of his creation. He prepared to fire, but the telescope was suddenly knocked out of line and Mojo noticed a streak of green. He felt motion and his machine was swung in a circle, wider and wider, faster and faster. The Rowdyruff boy released it and the weapon flew all the way into outer space, taking Mojo with it.
"Curse you, Rowdyruff Boys!" Mojo growled, shaking his fists.
Mojo Jojo clenched his teeth as he endured the process for the hundred-and-first time. Handcuffs. Mug shot. Fingerprints. Thrown into a cell. He jumped up, gritting his teeth at the guards as they slammed the door.
Mojo Jojo laughed in the glass dome at the head of his newest giant robot. He shoved and kicked some buildings to the ground. He stomped on a car and crushed a ship in the bay with his hand. He punched another building, smashing it. His joyous destruction was cut off once again at the sight of the Rowdyruff Boys. Brick flew between the robot's legs and up the front. Mojo tried to smash him between the robot's hands, but Brick was too fast. He flew up to the dome and punched the glass. Mojo expected it to shatter and was pleasantly surprised when it simply cracked. Mojo went after Brick, but Boomer and Butch had stretched telephone wires across the road and the robot threatened to lose its balance. Brick flew behind the robot and gave it the last nudge it needed to trip over the wires. The force of the impact threw Mojo against the weak spot in the glass. He broke through and tumbled to a stop in front of the boys.
"Give it up, Mojoke!" Butch growled.
"You will never defeat us. So there!" Boomer blew a raspberry at him.
"The Rowdyruff Boys never lose!" Brick proclaimed.
Mojo Jojo endured it for the final time, seething quietly. Handcuffs. Mug shot. Fingerprints. Thrown into a cell. He landed on his head, standing on the flat surface of his helmet. He just watched the guards slam the door. He fell to his side. He couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't just rage. He couldn't enjoy his destruction. He couldn't win. He couldn't get thrown in jail anymore. It had to stop. It couldn't stop. Everything he'd tried failed. He'd tried being angry. He'd tried enjoying it. He'd tried sitting and thinking everything through. Nothing worked. Nothing would ever work. Mojo Jojo couldn't do it. So maybe he had to stop being Mojo Jojo.
He felt the wild animal deep inside scratching to come out. His super-human brain was done. He let it go and felt himself turn into a wild animal. He ran around the cell, screeching like a monkey, punching everything, kicking everything, bouncing off the walls. He latched onto the bars, screeching at the top of his lungs.
The wild animal had worn itself out. Mojo Jojo was back. And he was back better than before. Smarter. Angrier. He could do it. He sat in the corner doing what he did best. What he sometimes forgot he did best. Thinking. He could think of a way. He could think forever if he needed to.
"Curse those accursed Rowdyruff Boys," he muttered, his voice echoing slightly in the silence of the stone prison at night, "They always defeat my plans! I must devise a plan so diabolical, so sinister, it will bring those tiny titans to their knees!" An idea popped into his mind. He held it and let it grow. "I need to beat them at their own game." He gasped with inspiration. "I need to fight fire with fire! I need-." His plan in his mind was complete. "I need to make a phone call." He laughed in anticipation of his greatest plan ever.
"Hey, shut up in there!" a guard growled.
Mojo closed his mouth and laughed internally.
Mojo Jojo took his one phone call, which he never used, and dialed the Rowdyruff Boys's hotline.
Someone picked up. "Hello?" Boomer's unmistakable voice answered.
"Hello, uh, may I speak to Professor Utonium?"
"Who shall I say is calling?"
"Oh, no one he'd know, just a curious stranger."
"Professor!" Boomer called, "There's a stranger on the phone!"
Mojo waiting anxiously, concerned about Boomer's wording.
"Hello, Mister Stranger, what can I do for you?" came the Professor's luxurious deep voice.
"Oh," Mojo cleared his throat, surprised it was working, and slightly changed the tone of his voice, "Uh, hi, I'm calling from Townsville Community College, and I'm doing a report on the Rowdyruff Boys, and I was wondering . . . what exactly are those little boys made of?" he finished quickly with his usual deep growl.
The Professor chuckled. "Oh, well, the Rowdyruff Boys. Well, let's see now. Eight cups of snips, a pinch of snails . . ."
Mojo pulled out a pad and pencil to write, holding the phone with his shoulder.
"One tablespoon of puppy dog tails, and . . . now this one's important. Accidentally add a drop of Chemical X. And viola!"
"That's it?!" Mojo said in disbelief, "I mean, wow, thanks."
"I also have a great recipe for pound-."
Mojo hung up. He thought aloud. "Snips and snails and puppy dog tails? That's too boyish. I need something sneakier. Crueler. More entitled! Hmmm . . . . What are little girls made of?"
Mojo Jojo acquired some sugar and spices from the dealer who always managed to sneak drugs and stuff into prison. He found some feathers in his mattress, caught a stray butterfly, and meticulously picked sparkles out of the concrete.
He stared at his collection proudly, cradled in his hands. "Let's see now. Sugar and spice and everything nice. All that leaves is . . ." He closed his hands around the spices and items and looked around the cell. "Chemical X. There's got to be something around here with that potency. Hmm . . . let's see . . . ." His gaze fell on the toilet, glowing green and emitting fumes. "Aha!" He ran to the bowl and embraced it, then took a deep breath through his nose. He gestured for dramatic effect as he spoke. "Yeees! Definitely . . . Chemical . . . X!" He coughed the 'X' and hummed with delight.
He looked out the window to see the full moon. "Ahh, the moon is in proper alignment." He looked at the toilet, imagining candles and skulls set up around it as a shrine. "The cauldron awaits! And the ingredients are ripe." He raised his hands above his head. "Let the seeds of evil bear fruit!" He opened his hands, letting his collection fall into the bowl. He reverently flushed them away. He watched the water as it swirled and gurgled away down the pipes. He stared into the empty bowl. He waited.
Silence. Nothing.
The toilet began to shake. The pipes rattled. Water sloshed out of the bowl.
Mojo's face spread into a wide grin. "Yes . . . yes . . . yeeessss!" he hissed.
The toilet suddenly erupted like a geyser and Mojo hid his face. He watched in horror as the brown liquid surged toward him. The water filled the cell, sweeping him away, and pinning him against the bars as he held his breath. The water quickly drained away through the bars. Mojo fell to the ground, gasping for breath. He noticed three shadows in front of him and looked up in surprise.
Three little girls stood in front of him, looking ready for a fight, their heads huge and round, their eyes enormous and adorable, and their arms and legs rounded stumps. They all wore dresses with white stockings and little, black dress shoes. The one in the middle wore pink, rather that red, had long orange hair and a red bow instead of Brick's red hat. The blue one was much lighter than Boomer, with blonde hair and two pigtails. The green one, lighter that Butch, had short, cropped black hair.
Mojo grinned with joy. He scooped them up into a hug. "Ahh, my children!" He groaned when the pink one elbowed him in the jaw and flew up to the ceiling, holding him by the front of his shirt.
"Hands off! Who do you think you are anyway, Pops?!" she growled.
"Why, yes, I am your FATHER!" he yelled, sending the girl to the ground beside the other two. Mojo landed, standing over them. "CHILDREN!"
"Hey! We ain't no babies!" the blue one growled with a shrill voice.
"We're the Powerpuff Girls!" they all said together.
"Bubbles!" the blue one said.
"Blossom!" the pink one said.
"Buttercup!" the green one said.
"We're here to kick some butt!" Blossom said, "And since yours is the only one around, we're gonna start with you!"
They advanced.
"Oh, no, no, girls. You don't want to kick my butt. My butt is as rotten as yours. What you want are butts settled on the throne of justice."
"Yeah!" they all said together.
"Butts planted in the soil of nobility!"
"Yeah!"
"Butts nestled between the pillars of peace and love! The butts you want to kick are the butts of . . . the Rowdyruff Boys!
"Let's get 'em!"
"I'd be glad to take you to them if we only had a way out of heeeee . . . !" Mojo screamed his last word as Blossom grabbed him and flew toward the ceiling behind Bubbles and Buttercup, who punched a hole in the ceiling as they all flew away.
Butch flew at the giant octopus and gave it a hard punch. Boomer and Brick dodged its tentacles as they smashed the ground. Brick stretched out a tentacle and Boomer flew through it, cutting it off. The monster looked at its chopped arm in shock and fury. Boomer and Butch punched its face, one at a time. Brick flew in with the severed tentacle and slammed the octopus so hard it spun in a circle, tangling its tentacles. It uncurled as it swayed, stunned, and began to fall straight toward Boomer.
"Boomer, look out!" Brick and Butch shouted together.
"Go away, ladybugs! Go away!" Boomer said, trying to shoo a group of ladybugs away from a patch of flowers in the monster's path. He looked up to see the creature above him. "Huh? Go away, ladybugs! Fly! Fly away!" He sucked in a breath and blew all the ladybugs away, just in time. But too late for him. "Uh-oh."
The octopus monster smashed Boomer. Brick and Butch gasped and darted after him. They landed beside the monster's blank eye, concerned for their brother. The eye began to bulge and stretch. It burst open, exploding out with green goop. Boomer landed next to his brothers, covered in slime.
"Boomer, are you okay?" Brick asked.
"I think so, I-."
"Why don't you guys pick on someone your own size?" an unfamiliar female voice called.
The boys looked across the street and gasped to see themselves in female form.
"We're the Powerpuff Girls, and we wanna fight!"
Each girl punched a boy, sending them flying into a building. Boomer and Butch fell to the sidewalk, but Brick smashed through the wall.
Brick pulled himself up out of the hole. "What's up with those girls?!"
"I think they're asking for a hiney-whooping!" Butch growled and flew after the girls, giggling prematurely over their assumed victory. Butch knocked Blossom away, too fast for her sisters to react, and slammed her into a dumpster. He punched her repeatedly, denting the dumpster.
Bubbles and Buttercup knocked Butch down and punched and kicked him on the ground. Boomer and Brick flew in and knocked Bubbles and Buttercup away, sending them sliding on the ground beside Blossom.
"Hey! What's wrong with you boys? You're supposed to start crying when we hit you!" Blossom said.
"Yeah!" Bubbles agreed.
Boomer helped Butch to his feet.
"What are you guys, new?" Brick asked.
"Yeah! We're the Rowdyruff Boys!" Boomer said.
"And it takes a lot more than a couple of cheap shots to make us cry," Butch said.
"Well, then. I guess we'll just have to serve it up!" Blossom said to her sisters, looking at each in turn.
They grinned. The Powerpuff Girls rushed the Rowdyruff Boys. Blossom punched Brick in the face. Brick returned with a kick under the chin. Bubbles slammed Boomer into the ground. Boomer kicked Bubbles over his head and into a building. Blossom and Brick punched each other in the air. Buttercup repeatedly punched Butch, until Butch caught her arm and swung her against the same wall as Boomer. Brick finally got in a good punch, sending Blossom into the same building.
The dust settled, revealing Blossom growling in fury.
She suddenly jumped out. "Acrobattack!"
The three girls jumped down to the ground, one at a time, and cartwheeled down the street at high speeds. Each one stopped on their hands at their male counterpart and kicked them under the chin, sending them flying into the air. The girls flew after them and caught each boy by the sneakers. They swung the boys down and kicked them back to the ground, one by one. The Rowdyruff Boys smashed deep into the pavement. They looked up from the ground, furious.
Brick jumped up. "Ballistic Barrage!" he shouted.
The three boys ran toward the girls, their feet pounding the pavement. They began jumping between buildings as they approached, confusing the girls with their crossing colors. They suddenly jumped into the air and dove into the girls, punching ceaselessly. The Powerpuff Girls smashed deep into the pavement under the assault. The boys finally jumped away, leaving the girls, furious, in the dust.
Both sides charged each other, screaming. They collided with rapid-fire punches, kicks, chokes, throws, and laser eye beams, smashing hole after hole in the road and nearby buildings. Brick rushed Blossom. She dodged, caught his leg, spun him around, and threw him into a building. Boomer flew at Bubbles, who kicked him in the stomach, sending him through a window. He slid on the counter and crashed into the cash register.
"Boomer! Are you all right?" the shopkeeper asked.
Boomer rubbed his head. "Yeah, I'm okay. Sorry about your window, Mr. Looper!" He flew back through the broken window as the shopkeeper called after him.
"It's Cooper! Cooper!"
Butch flew at Buttercup. Buttercup punched him so hard he flew straight through two buildings and into a third one, landing on a couch in a family's living room. Buttercup appeared through the hole in the wall. Butch swung the couch at Buttercup, smashing another hole in the wall.
Brick fell out of the sky and landed on his head on the front of a sports car, smashing it. Blossom landed on her feet on the back end, smashing it and throwing Brick off the front. Blossom flew after him. Boomer ran from Bubbles's eye lasers as the beams destroyed everything in their path. Brick and Buttercup flew past a car with people in it. Brick flew around a corner and skirted past a woman, but Blossom flew right under her dress and punched Brick.
"And furthermore, every Wednesday will be Pretzel Day," the Mayor continued.
Brick slammed into the window.
"Hello, Brick!"
Brick slid down out of view.
"Eh, goodbye, Brick."
Boomer slammed into the window.
"Hello, Boomer!"
Boomer slipped out of view.
"Eh, goodbye, Boomer."
Butch slammed into the window.
"Hello Butch!"
Butch slipped out of view.
"Eh, goodbye, Butch." The Mayor turned back to Ms. Bellum as she approached the window. "What kind of pretzels do you think the boys like, the Bavarian or tiny twists?"
"Sir, I think the boys may be in trouble," Ms. Bellum said as three brightly colored girls flew past the window, one by one.
"Whatever makes you say that?" the Mayor asked with a wave of his hand.
The entire building shook.
Butch rubbed his head, in a deep hole in the steps of the Townsville Hall with his brothers. "Wh- wh- . . . where'd they go now?"
Brick pushed himself up. "I don't know. But if we keep smashing up Townsville like this, I-."
"Dah! Rowdyruff Boys! Look out!" the Talking Dog shouted.
Bubbles threw a school bus full of people at the Rowdyruff Boys.
"Heeeeelp!" the bus passengers screamed.
Blossom threw a plane with its wings torn off.
"Heeeeelp!" the plane passengers screamed.
Buttercup threw an ocean liner.
"Heeeeelp!" the ship passengers screamed.
The boys watched the three projectiles. "Uh-oh . . . ."
Each of them shot off after one of the vehicles. Boomer caught the front of the bus and skidded to a stop on the road. Brick rammed himself into the nose of the plane and flew against its falling momentum as hard as he could. The plane creaked as it pushed him down. He opened his eyes and realized he was floating a few inches off the ground. He landed hard. Butch rammed into the ship and it slammed him into the ground. He held it while its momentum shoved him down the road, cutting a long rut. He stopped just inches from the Talking Dog and Butch set it down with a crash.
"Hooray for the Rowdyruff Boys!" the passengers shouted in unison, "We're saved! Hooray! Hooray!"
"No problem, good citizens," Brick began, "We were happy to-."
The boys were suddenly knocked away by the girls, who immediately began arguing about who had gotten them.
"These girls aren't playing fair!" Brick said after jumping out of yet another hole in a wall.
"They're really out to get us!" Butch said.
"And they don't care who gets in their way!" Boomer said.
"We better take this fight out of Townsville before some innocent people get hurt!" Brick said.
The three of them flew off.
"Catch us if you can!" Butch taunted.
"Look at those sissies!" Buttercup teased.
"Yeah! Running like lil' chickens!" Bubbles added.
"Let's get 'em!" Blossom shouted as they flew after the boys.
The Rowdyruff Boys dodged skyscrapers, leading the Powerpuff Girls straight out of Townsville.
"Here they come!" Brick said.
The Rowdyruff Boys turned at a sharp angle, sending the girls straight off in the wrong direction. The Powerpuff Girls quickly stopped and flew after the boys, picking up speed.
"Kick in the afterburners!" Blossom ordered.
The colored streaks billowed into colored smoke full of sparkles and their speed increased.
"Uh-oh! They're gaining fast!" Brick exclaimed.
The girls zipped past the boys, sending them spinning in the air. They boys coughed and choked, their eyes watering at the unbearable smell.
"I . . . can't . . . see!" Butch choked.
"I can't . . . breathe!" Boomer complained.
The three of them fell out of the sky, coughing.
"Good thing we robbed that perfume store this morning," Buttercup remarked, then laughed.
Bubbles and Blossom laughed with her.
"Yeah, girl!" Bubbles said.
"Word!" Blossom agreed, "Now let's finish those sissies!"
The three of them charged up their energy. Lightning flashed around them.
"Yeah!" they all shouted at once.
They dove toward their falling counterparts, glowing with energy. Each one knocked a boy, zapping them and causing them to cry out in pain. The Rowdyruff Boys fell toward Townsville.
"Look! Up in the sky!" a man called.
"It's a missile!"
"It's a bomb!"
"It's a death ray!"
Ms. Bellum looked into the sky to see a triple-colored streak heading straight for the earth. "It's the boys!"
"Oh?!" the Mayor said.
A blinding white flash rose from the ground as the boys made impact. Ms. Bellum shielded her eyes from the light. The entire city stood silent at the horror and shock of what had just happened.
As the flash faded away, the Powerpuff Girls, giggling, looked down at the deep hole in the ground where the Rowdyruff Boys lay, motionless.
"Well, that takes care of them," Blossom said.
"Let's go back to Mojo's pad and celebrate!" Buttercup said.
The girls flew off.
The police tried to keep the crowd back as horrified citizens approached the scene, but it was useless.
Mojo Jojo saw the blinding light through his window and laughed with ecstasy. "Goodbye, Rowdyruff Boys. Your end has finally come. Your reign of goodness has come to an end, and my reign of evil has just begun!"
Mojo yelled in surprise when he was suddenly doused with a huge cooler of a green sports drink. The Powerpuff Girls laughed and he joined them.
"Oh-ho-ho, you guys!"
His evil plan had finally worked. He had rid himself of the Rowdyruff Boys . . . and gained three daughters in the process.
A crowd surrounded the hole, weeping at the fate of their heroes. Tears fell to the ground, Ms. Bellum's included.
A tiny, sparkling drop of water passed all the pipes on its way down the hole and splashed on Brick's forehead. He moaned. Tears dripped on Boomer and Butch and they began to moan and mumble.
The crowd dispersed out of despair.
"We're . . ." The Mayor sniffled. "Oh we're too late . . . ."
The Rowdyruff Boys slowly floated out of the hole, holding hands, somber and full of despair.
The Mayor noticed and brightened immediately. "Rowdyruff Boys! You're alive!"
The Boys floated to the ground, heads hung.
"Yes . . . but . . . we lost," Brick said concisely, "We've failed you, Townsville."
"Guess you won't want us protecting you anymore," Butch said.
"We're sure you'll find new, even better superheroes," Boomer said.
They faced the edge of town. The citizens watched in stunned silence.
"Goodbye Townsville," the boys said in unison.
Ms. Bellum ran to them and dropped to her knees. "Boys! Boys, wait! We don't want new superheroes. We love you!"
"What?" the boys questioned.
"Besides, you haven't lost. You've just been attacking the problem from the wrong angle. Listen. What do little tomboys fear more than anything in the world?"
"Bugs!" Boomer shouted.
"No, Boomer, that's what you're afraid of," Butch said.
"Oh yeah."
"Guys . . . you have what tomboys fear most. Instead of fighting, try being nice."
"Huh?" the boys questioned.
"You know . . . nice." Ms. Bellum spread her hands for emphasis.
Boomer giggled.
"I get it!" Brick said.
"Eww, gross!" Butch growled.
"What are you people talking about?" the Mayor asked, scratching his head.
"Come on, boys. Let's go . . ." Brink winked at his brothers. "Get 'em."
The Rowdyruff Boys flew off.
"Good luck, boys," Ms. Bellum said.
The Rowdyruff Boys flew to Mojo Jojo's observatory. They looked in the window to see Mojo and the girls laughing and toasting around a map of the world, discussing their conquest. The Powerpuff Girls gasped, shocked to see the boys alive, and Mojo spit out his drink. The boys flew away.
"What the-?!" the girls shouted.
"Get them!" Mojo yelled.
The girls crashed through the window and raced toward the boys, but stopped short, stunned. "What the-?!"
The boys leaned in the air, as if against a wall, with shades and their shirts open. Boomer and Brick had their hands in their pockets and Butch had his arms crossed. They tipped their heads slightly, slipping their sunglasses down, and looked at the girls over the rims. Brick floated nonchalantly to Blossom and kissed her on the cheek. Her face contorted in disgust. Boomer and Butch followed suit. The girls, disgusted and offended beyond words, screamed and glowed until they exploded, separating into their three components. Sugar, spice, and everything nice rained on the ground.
"Curse you again, Rowdyruff Boys! I'll be back, but next time I will not be defeated!"
The doors of the police car were slammed shut on him as he ranted.
"It is you who will be defeated, and when you're defeated, it is you who will have lost!"
The vehicle drove away.
"I kinda liked kissing," Brick said, a little embarrassed.
Boomer chuckled. "Yeah!"
They both laughed.
"How about you, Butch?" Brick asked.
Butch spit and growled in disgust. He glared at his brothers as they laughed at him.