"So yeah, it was pretty weird overall... sitting ridiculously close to me to staring at me for a long ass time while I was picking my nose, sitting in my cart that's full of incense even though we agreed that that it should be DISPOSED of, then giving me this bullshit excuse of being more worried about us doing our job, carrying me in her arm even though we were supposed to split up…it was so weird. It was like she was being out of character instead of the no-nonsense terminator she's supposed to be, but I guess that's not much better than being a freaking playboy who'd sleep with anyone, man or woman. All in all, pretty weird day, but at least it was topped off with a cup of sake...and a lungful of secondhand smoke."

That was the summary Gintoki gave to the long haired man eating next to him about the shenanigans that occurred in the red light district called Yoshiwara one afternoon. In a ramen restaurant called Hokuto Shinken no less. The man finished his mouthful of soba (because he's the only person who would order SOBA in a RAMEN restaurant, the nutter) and turned to the silver haired perm head.

"You fool Gintoki, how can you inhale so much incense to the point you start flirting with anything that has a pair of lungs?"

Gintoki gave an unimpressed look at the man. "Oi don't blame me Zura, that incense was strooong. But hey, if it got to you it might actually give you a chance to flirt with someone other than Elizabeth."

Zura responds back. "Zura janai, Katsura da. And I don't have any romantic feelings for Elizabeth. She is a comrade, not a lover and that's all I have to say about that."

Katsura returned to slurping his soba while a bowl full of ramen with some beef and vegetables on the side arrived in front of Gintoki. "Sorry for the wait." The chef who served this ramen was a woman with long blonde hair tied up in a ponytail. Gintoki puts his hands together and replies in a monotone voice: "Thanks Ikumatsu. Itadakimasu…"

The two guys simply stayed quiet as they enjoyed their meals and Hokuto Shinken's ambiance. It felt like a comfortable spot to hang out and have a decent laugh in rather than just a standard restaurant. At times it even felt like a second home. Gintoki slurps up his ramen and looks up at Ikumatsu busily preparing some more ingredients before turning to Katsura with a smirk.

"So that's my romance story done and dusted, how's yours coming along? Has it finally begun to move?"

Katsura turns to Gintoki after finishing a mouthful of soba and curtly responds: "I told you before, I don't have one." He goes back to eating his soba.

Gintoki leans in and whispers in Katsura's ear: "So you haven't made a move eh? Thats a shame, thought you would've hit * base with Ikumatsu by now, but seems you're still sucking on ramen instead of sucking on-"

Katsura coughs vigorously, desperately trying to keep the soba in his mouth from spewing out or worse still, choke on it.

He eventually calms down and swallows his mouthful while Gintoki raises an eyebrow with his deadpan look. "You all right?"

"I'm not all right, I'm Katsura! Don't say that in Ikumatsu dono's presence, have some shame!" Katsura angrily whispered back, almost raising his voice and forgetting that he's in the same room as Ikumatsu.

Gintoki continued to give his friend the deadpan stare. "I never had any to begin with. I had my third leg out in front of Tsukuyo when I was taking a leak remember? That's how the whole love incense stuff started. I mean yeah I was drunk but still, weren't you listening to anything I said?"

Ikumatsu turns around upon hearing Katsura's rather distressed tone looking bemused. "What's this about saying stuff when I'm around?"

Gintoki perks up a little at this and happily replied: "Oh nothing, we were just talking about how Zura hasn't made * base with y-"

Katsura instantly grabbed Gintoki's hair and dunked his head into his ramen quite violently, spilling some of the soup over the counter. Katsura responded in a somewhat exaggerated tone: "We were merely discussing our nonexistent love lives Ikumatsu-dono. Speaking of which Gintoki, how's yours?"

Gintoki moved his head up chewing on some ramen whilst his head was in the bowl and finished his mouthful. "Huh? I don't have one. I thought you know that by now Zura."

Katsura hit back instantly. "If that's the case then why did you keep calling this Tsukuyo 'honey'? And that confession? Surely it must be because you did it of your own free will…"

"Oi I-I was under the effects of that incense, that thing was strong remember? Like you said, I was flirting with anyone with a pair of lungs! As if I would ever have a thing for a terminator in heels!" No way, heheh…"

Gintoki awkwardly ruffled his perm whilst Ikumatsu and Katsura stared at him for an uncomfortably long time before the latter put a hand to his chin. "You've never been this bashful when talking about a woman…if at all. Isn't that right Ikumatsu-dono?"

Ikumatsu also put a hand on her chin and smiled. "Come to think of it, you never bring up this idea of romance. So you do have a soul behind those dead fish eyes..."

"Hey! Of course I have a soul, a silver soul at that!"

"But you walk around like a dead man walking every time I see you…" Katsura butted in.

"Because I either sleep late or I've been up drinking! Look we're getting off topic, there's no way in hell I'm in love with that crazy lady!"

Ikumatsu tilted her head slightly at this. "Yet you argue like a couple. Based on what I heard from your story, perhaps it's mere coincidence that your personalities mesh so well...or maybe you enjoy seeing her reactions because you like her."

Katsura nods his head thoughtfully at this as if he was a sage. "That's true, some people tend to tease their love interests because they have strong affections for them."

Gintoki narrows his eyes at him, partly because he could see the irony behind Katsura's words as he clearly remembered Ikumatsu throwing Katsura's soba in his face for mocking her ramen cooking skills during the Homeless Arc, but also because both Ikumatsu and Katsura hit the nail on the head: He liked Tsukuyo and teased her as his way of showing affection. Ever since he first met her in what should've been heroic but ultimately turned out to be embarrassing circumstances, he had a fondness for her, despite not showing it. Even if he got suplexed, stepped on his face, kicked in the face or even had a thousand kunais to his head, her reaction was well worth it each time. He remained silent and turned to his messy bowl and grumbled a little bit.

Ikumatsu and Katsura both hummed in unison whilst Gintoki continued to stare at his bowl, not daring to make eye contact now that he'd been rumbled. Ikumatsu's voice eventually broke through the silence.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of you know, I'm sure there's a way to work it out."

"She's right you know. Why don't you do something nice for her for a change?" Said Katsura.

Gintoki still stared at his bowl. "Like what?" A present or something?"

"Yeah, a present will do nicely." Ikumatsu replied.

Gintoki eventually looks at Katsura and Ikumatsu. "How the hell do I go about it though? I'm not the type of guy to buy gifts for their loved ones three months in advance, if at all."

"You don't need to Gintoki, it can be simple like giving them a special surprise." Said Katsura.

Gintoki shook his head in disbelief at what Katsura said. He has a thing for widows, how the hell could someone like him give advice on romance?

"Like what? A bomb? No chance. I don't need your advice anyway, a man can just get by through sheer willpower."

Katsura nodded his head nonchalantly. "Mmhm, and what happened when you tried doing that? Have you forgotten that time you were given the cold shoulder by that girl and went with Takasu-"

"Shut up. And that girl ended up passing on that shorty anyway so she doesn't count…" Gintoki snapped back before sighing and reluctantly listened to what they had to say...

After a fruitful exchange on handling romance from a widowed ramen chef and the man with a torch for widowed women, Gintoki soon found himself in Yoshiwara for some reason and headed for a tea shop run by Tsukuyo's close friend: The Sun of Yoshiwara known as Hinowa. As he approached one of the tables to sit down at, Hinowa gave Gintoki her usual gracious smile.

"Oh hello Gin-san, what brings you here today?"

"Eh, nothing much. I'm just bored is all." Gintoki replied with his usual deadpan tone.

"That's rather unlike you Gin-san, normally you're here for a drink. Or perhaps you're here for a certain someone…?" Hinowa asked politely.

"As if I'm here to see that alcoholic workaholic-oh shit." Gintoki impulsively replied, palming his face with embarrassment.

Hinowa simply chuckled as she continued to smile. "It's quite easy for me to tell that Tsukuyo fell for you but I didn't expect you to be so forward with your own feelings. Not to worry though Gin-san, I might have some solutions to your dilemma."

At that point a blonde woman with two notable scars down her face and forehead smoking a kiseru stopped by, someone who Gintoki really didn't want to see at this moment. "What's all this about? Who's dilemma-oh. Hey. Looking as dull as ever I see. What brings ya here this time?"

"Well Tsukuyo, Gin-san and I were discussing- "

"Uhhhh we were just discussing some jobs that I might be able to help with here, business is kinda slow for me at the moment and I'm a little short on money to pay the rent…haha…" Gintoki awkwardly interjected.

Hinowa seemed rather amused by his knee-jerk reaction, but hums and nods her head definitively much to Gintoki's surprise. "Yes, we were discussing some potential jobs that Gin-san can take part in, I think he'll be a huge help."

Tsukuyo raised an eyebrow and stares a little awkwardly at the two for a bit before puffing out some smoke. "Oook, sure alright. But why exactly are you here though Gintoki? If we needed your help we could just give ya a call."

"Gin-san came here to see how you were doing Tsukuyo."

With that bombshell dropped, Gintoki simply narrowed his eyes at the smiling sun looking rather exasperated. Tsukuyo on the other hand, froze up and her jaw nearly dropped, almost letting her kiseru drop out of her mouth. She could feel her face burn up.

"Wha-Why would ya do that? That's so unlike ya! There's no way you'd get off ye lazy ass just to see me!"

"Well, here I am, I got off my ass and I'm here in yoshiwara talking to a drunk terminator." Gintoki casually replied.

"Technically ye not off your ass if ye sitting down Gintoki. Look, point is there's no way ye could possibly be bothered to come all this way just to see me! Your lifestyle just contradicts everything about that!"

"Oi, my lifestyle fits me perfectly so I can still go wherever the hell I want if I feel like it." Gintoki lazily replied, waving a hand in front of him.

"Then maybe ye should start thinking about fixing it like ye fix that perm head of yours." Tsukuyo retorted, folding her arms.

"Oi, that's a low blow tayuu, my hair fits my lifestyle perfectly: comfortable, low effort required to maintain and unrestrained!" Gintoki shouted as he stood up from his table and got close to tsukuyo, folding his arms as well. "Why dontcha fix that stone cold personality of yours instead!"

"Oh yeah? How about ye-"

Hinowa silently watched as the two continued to bicker between themselves, taking in the tension emanating from the pair and smiling all the way. She starts chuckling as they kept arguing over trivial things speaking up. "You two are very much alike."

This statement brings a sudden halt to the argument, but prompts a very angry reaction from the totally not couple-esque pair, both pointing their fingers at each other and shouting.

"HEY, YOU THINK I ACT LIKE HER?!"

"HEY, YE THINK I ACT LIKE HIM?!"

Hinowa delicately covers her mouth to hide her giggles as she continues to smile at the pair, deciding not to say anything for the time being, though it probably would have been amusing to get more reactions from them. Tsukuyo lets out an exasperated sigh and turns around. "I appreciate the concern but I can handle life just fine here." And on that note she took another puff of smoke and walked away.

Gintoki sighs as he sits back down on his table and crosses his leg over the other. "Sheesh she's such a handful..."

Hinowa looks at Gintoki and smiles at him reassuringly. "I'm sure she's grateful that you went out of your way to see her. After all, it's not everyday you visit Yoshiwara." She claps her hands together. "Come to think of it, I do actually have some requests for you Gin-san."

Gintoki groaned as he ruffled his hair, feeling rather suspicious of Hinowa's intentions straight away. "If you're asking me to take her out on a date like last time that ain't gonna work. You know what she's like once her lips touch a drop of sake."

Hinowa shakes her head a little bit. "No no nothing like that, I'd just like you to assist Tsukuyo with her work for a little bit. Helps take some of the weight off her shoulders. The fees will be quite generous for you too. You said that you've been struggling to pay your rent right? Then this should be a win-win situation."

Even though he had a pretty good idea of Hinowa's true intentions, Gintoki studied her demeanour for some time. It ended up being very difficult to do since her serene smile also doubled as an excellent poker face, making it nearly impossible to discern her true intentions. Win-win situation? For who, me or her? If I don't take her offer, that granny is gonna give me another earful for not paying up, but if I do, this lady is gonna use this as an excuse to play matchmaker… He thought. He eventually gave up and sighed, reluctantly agreeing to help tsukuyo out.

Later that evening, Gintoki prepares for bed after a somewhat muted dinner with kagura who noticed that Gintoki was unusually quiet, with the former claiming he was just tired and wanted to go to bed, with Kagura not pushing the subject further. Gintoki gets changed into his lime-green pyjamas and takes a trip to his bathroom to brush his teeth, looking more and more deadpan. A spiral of thoughts swirled around in his mind about the situation he was in. The offers will definitely give him plenty of money to pay the rent, but if things go wrong, it'll end up like that time he 'dated' six people in an attempt to take responsibility for a wild night gone wrong, not to mention the bollocking Shu*sha will give if something like that happened again in their shonen series, but an even bigger thought clouded his mind, something more destructive than a harem: his own self-esteem. He'd always be willing to help anyone when situations were dire, stranger or friend, that's just who he is. Yet he could never make the extra step of dabbling in the concept of romance. He hated it. He hated himself. He hated his weakness since the day Shoyo was killed. Shoyo was the first person to take him in, gave him love, affection and hope, and Gintoki gave it back, only to be ripped away from him in a war that was destined to end in failure. Tsukuyo emanated that same feeling. She could more than hold her own in a fight, and she was probably the only woman who could relate to him and share his pain of losing a master they looked up to their whole life. Yet he didn't want to reach out, he didn't want to burden her with his pain. In his mind, it's probably the only way.

Gintoki wraps up his business in the bathroom and slides the bathroom door shut before laying out his futon and crawling into it. Tomorrow might be another day, but to him it would feel like hell.

Meanwhile in Yoshiwara, Tsukuyo returns to Hinowa's tea shop after a day of patrolling. A relatively mundane task but one that was imperative to safeguarding Yoshiwara. Even after its liberation from the Night King Hosen it was still vulnerable to crime and danger. She heads up the stairs to greet Hinowa and her adopted son Seita. "I'm home!"

"Welcome back Tsukuyo-nee!"

"Welcome back Tsukuyo! Oh by the way, I've asked Gin-san to help you for the next few days."

"Huh? B-but why? I don't need his help! Besides, I can't concentrate properly when he's around…." Tsukuyo replied with a light blush on her face, seeming baffled by the announcement and blows some smoke from her kiseru to calm her nerves.

Hinowa merely smiled at Tsukuyo. "Don't worry, it's only for a little while and it's simply on professional terms, nothing more." Tsukuyo shakes her head and sighs, knowing it would be pointless to argue against someone who has teased her several times about the man she's fallen for.

Hinowa perked up suddenly like she's almost forgotten something. "Oh! One more thing, the summer festival on the surface is coming up tomorrow, this might be a good time to relax for a little bit. You are quite the workaholic after all."

Tsukuyo pondered about this for a little bit before slowly nodding her head.

"Alright then, I'll come along."

A/N: This is my first time writing a fanfiction like this, so I apologise if the writing looks like giant walls of text, I'm still getting to grips with this site, plus some of the characters might seem OOC. it's one thing to visualise in a way that stays true to the spirit of Gintama but it's another thing to put it into words lol. The Rated M smut will start coming into effect with the upcoming chapters, think of it as level progression ;)

As for the hurt/comfort tag that will also kick in during the later chapters. I would put humour in there too since Gintama does every genre but I can only put in so many ;-;

Please feel free to give it a review, it would really help! :)