For ages, she just felt alone, in the cold vaccum between life and death. She could not physically feel, but it did feel like death was taking its time.
Her spirit felt like it was drifting in a plane, her eyes rendered themselves blind and her body felt tired and immobile.
Her montrals had a different story, she felt the ringing of white noise and different voices speaking. It was clear that they didn't speak directly to her but she could still hear nonetheless.
'Then I will avenge his Death' Her voice echoed around the chasm, her eyesight was blind, yet she could remember this defining moment like it was yesterday, one of the few times when her voice had openly cracked mid sentance, as she felt dumbstruck and lost, the cycle of grief order 66 had brought hitting like new. She never realised how much her tone had a dangerously emotional edge to it. At the time it did not concern her how much others would have disapproved at how unbecoming of a jedi the dialogue was.
'Revenge is not the Jedi Way' the monster taunted back. The thing that claimed in more ways than one to be the shell of a man anakin was; the monster shared his soul, shared what was left of his marred and mutilated body, and spoke through a disheveled and twisted mechanical voice.
'You act like a jedi... at least.. what I want them to be' Raffa had confidence in her, confidence which she feels she failed to give herself. She may have made some change in her eventful lifespan, hopefully it was enough for her to rest easy knowing she wasn't as large a disgrace as how she thought herself to be.
'I am no jedi' Her words were still true to this day, she was a force user, yes, but not a jedi. And hadn't been for many years. Something she wasn't willing to boast about. All it had brought her was uncertainty and doubt of the path she had always previously believed that she was destined for.
'Go. It's what you're meant to do' The path back to the jedi always found her, whether she wanted it or not. In time she had accepted that, but her old attachments always found a way to engrain itself in her. The seeds embedded out of habit by her former master turned sith apprentice.
'Ahsoka' the mechanical voice of her former master wheezed, a broken man hiding in the shadows. 'Ahsoka'. The man she would have travelled the galaxy for to reclaim, and bring unconditional compassion to ease the guilt of abandoning him when he needed it most. The one which knew her weaknesses and strengths like a brother, and yet he had the mental capacity to blind her with ghosts of the past and leave her in a dangerous galaxy.
'I've seen what such feelings can do to a fully fledged knight. To the best of Us.' her voice, perhaps her conscience or herself from a different time.
'Anakin! I won't leave you! Not this time!' the time where her compassion blinded her and nearly got her killed as she hung onto the hope that Anakin would someday return. But she was never the one destined to get his redemption.
'Then you will die' the final interactions between the ghost of her past and the destruction of happy memories long lost to the gunfire of order 66 and the bombing of the temple.
Despite the onslaught of voices, all she could think about was if Rex was experiencing something remotely similar, or if he was still in clutches holding on for dear life. In a blinding ray of light, she felt her limbs regain energy and she felt her conscience being forced into another body. Her senses peaked back up and she could feel the air around her and she could sense...
Powerful force users, burning brightly in the force. Perhaps they are there to uncover her body, or to give her a burial.
The jedi. The jedi temple.There was a sith temple under the jedi temple
Her body felt like it was falling; falling and tumbling through the sky and there was nothing she could do except free fall, and contain her fears and worries. She wanted to scream, silently praying to the force for peace and stability, her mind was screaming and howling, raging to be released into a state of peace.
Finally, her body felt like it had hit the ground, and the sensations of falling had ceased. Her montrals could pick up distortions of different voices, muffled but present nontheless; maybe she wasn't dead, and was about to wake up in a new republic hospital bed with the loyal troopers and Re-
Rex
Did he survive? That was the first thing she wanted to know, nothing really mattered if the final person in her childhood life had died. Sure, she may have senator Mothma, or even Hera, but none of them had really known her until she was older. They weren't even close. Nowhere near in the same way as the two ex-soldiers were.
In a loud gasp, she felt air crash into her lungs without the musty damp smell of dust or falling stones, the air was fresh and clean and so much more different to that of Coruscant-
As her body jolted upwards, her arms met a cold and solid surface. Letting out a series of coughs, the dust that was once in her lungs was now gone, as if the temple collapsong on her was but a distant memory. After a fair share of quick, hacking coughs, her chest felt like it was being squished; constricted and crushed by something. Someone. And she felt a pair of warm hands cup her back.
Reaching out in the force, she sensed two presences she hadn't sensed since...
The clone wars.
A state of panic overcame her, she squirmed in the iron-locked grip, and survival instincts cut in. Her eyes shot open, noting the familiar green glow of... No. Just like all those years ago on Mortis, what a way to mock her.
"Hey Snips" a relieved voice groaned, as if the energy had been drained out of him.
Oh, to bring Anakin back too as a reminder of the brother she had lost. She wasn't having it. Even in a vision.
Her fist flew and connected with a brown tunic, for a second, it hurt more than it should have done, as the figure yelped back in surprise. As her jaw clentched tightly to suppress a low growl in pain, her eyes adjusted to the light. Springing into action, she readied herself in a combat position, until she glanced down at her arms and..
That wasn't right..
Thats...
"What?" she questioned, as her hands flew to her montrals, all stubby and short. She reached for her belt for her lightsabers, but they were no longer present. A string of colourful curses left her mouth, spanning through approximately 7 different languages as she came to the realisation that she was in her teenage body.
and then she remembered..
"Rex. Where is h-?" her breath hitched mid second, as her eyes froze on the two young figures of Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan kenobi. Her former master looked far from impressed, with a scowl painted on his face, and her grandmaster stood there in a crouched position, similar to the way he would be when comforting a young startled padawan.
Which, biologically, she now identified as.
"Meg te haran cuyir going bat?" shequestioned, half not expecting an answer as - from memory - they never learned Mando'a.
(Mand'oa translation: what the hell is going on?)
It was then that she realised, if this was infact real, that she had already slipped up.
"Ahsoka, it's okay, your safe now" Anakin beckoned slowly, trying not to provoke his thought-to-be padawan. It was then that she remembered the rush of memories.
There was a sith temple under the jedi temple.
Palpatine had returned
Her thoughts stuck to the latter, as she realised that this could be an illusion, crafted by Palpatine to lure her into a false sense of security. Her eyes flashed with malice as she backed away from the two jedi, and the father, who appeared equally confused.
Calling her idle lightsabers to her hands from their position on the ground, it snatched out of the hands of her grandmaster, as he bent down to pick them up. She stood in a defensive position, both blades unignited. "What is this illusion?" she demanded, in absolute refusal that she had been blasted back to Mortis, despite the vivdly acurate design of the skies, and all the people accompanying the scenery before her.
It was Obi-Wan who replied to this, his calming aura trying to work its effects on the padawan who was in shock, "it's okay padawan, put the lightsabers down". Her eyes flickered between the 3 figures before her, the lightsabers still held in a tight grip.
It was then that she was smacked with the realisation that if Palpatine was watching, he would be taking great satisfaction in seeing her so openly show her fear.
She would not give him that satisfaction.
Allowing her muscles to uncletch, her arms dropped to her sides, attaching both lightsabers to her belt.
"What is going on with you snips? It is only us" Anakin managed, reaching a steady hand to her, as if she was a scared animal.
Snips, the nickname that Anakin would give to her. Oh, if this was a trick, palpatine really knew how to get under her skin. Despite this, she would not let him see the glee of that either. The mask of fulcrum washed over her, as she tried to recall the role of teenage snippy young padawan, rather than Agent of the new republic, survivor of order 66.
Oh great. She was going to have to act naaive. This will cause a headache.
"Uh.. Sorry Skyguy." she murmered, walking hesitantly towards them, whilst simaltaneously watching their signatures for any faults; any hints of darkness in them. Any sign of a trick. "I... thought you were someone else."
"Welcome back, Ahsoka" Master Kenobi greeted, appearing less conflicted about the matter than his former padawan, whos gears were clearly turning in his head.
Like a beacon of light, Ahsoka naturally drifted towards master Kenobi, as she felt more trusting of his presence, knowing that at least Vader won't come springing out of Kenobi. If it was hard to imitate a force presence for a period of time, it would be Obi-Wan's, the jedi master's presence was nearly unmatched; basked in pure, unbridled light.
The older master rested a comforting hand on her shoulder, sending seemingly endless calming waves to the padawan.
"As the balance in this world crumbles, so shall war escalate in your galaxy" she turned towards the tall figure of the father, his grey features twisted with grief and his words laced with loss and sorrow. The figure bent down over the stone cold, unmoving body of his daughter.
Caressing her face and flinching at the lack of warmth there, he added "As my son has descended into the dark side, so have the sith gained strength."
She looked briefly to Anakin, feeling the darkness that was hidden in distant orbit of his signature; the future foundations to which Vader laid.
She could almost feel the anger bubbling in him, as his fists clentched at his side, his voice replied in such determination, that it made it easier than she remembered to file through the thoughts taking place in his mind. "We will stop your son" His voice had a low growl to it, no doubt plotting revenge.
"No" the father begged, looking back up to the trio, the same look plastered on his face as that from the first time they went to Mortis. "You must go, now"
The emotion in his eyes seemed lost, she could sense the urgency and panic far more vivdly than she last remembered, as his eyes kept drifting from his daughter to Ahsoka.
"He needs your ship to leave the planet"
Ahsoka already knew this, having lived through this moment once before, as she tried sending waves of compassion and sympathy to the powerful force user before her, as she caught anakin watching her in the corner of her eye.
"You must leave, before he can take it" the soft footsteps of Master Kenobi clipped to her left, approaching the figure, his features etched with concern and worry.
"What about you?" he enquired, gesturing to the daughter as the father held her paling hands.
The force user looked down, she read the look registered on his face in the same wat she noticed the slight details that she may have never noticed before; the welling of the eyelids; the tight frown of the mouth, the tensed muscles in his body and the sudden change in behaviour, all confidence forgotten. It was clear the man blamed himself, she could see it in every spec of his body, whereas the two jedi beside her clearly only registered the sadness that nearly spilled behind his eyes.
"It wasn't your fault" her voice croaked, faltering mid sentance as she recalled how she felt after her departure in the order, and how she allowed herself to live off guilt for many years. It was asif she could hear the cries of Anakin in the same way that she could all those years ago from the Lothal Temple. Why did you leave?
You abandoned me! You failed me!
Do you know what I have become?!
She became suddenly aware of how dry her throat had gotten, and became self conscious of the water that was beginning to collect itself in her tear ducts.
In an attempt to mask her emotions, she subtly rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand.
A storm surge raged around her, with lightning igniting the sky and flashing before and behind them, signifying that they were well and truly in the eye of the storm, and in the mix of the turmoil yet to come.
The chaos she could not stop.
"I shall mourn all that I have done, and all that is yet to be" the defeat in his voice was so blatantly obvious, so much so that she wished to reach out to him, to admit how sorry she was that she let anakin fall; that she couldn't fix what had already taken place in her own timeline, but most importantly, she wanted to speak with both confidence and defiance in her voice, the rebellious spark of hope that would ignite and tell him that she was NOT going to allow what transpired previously to take place, or she would die trying.
Hearing a hoot from the trees, the two jedi masters looked around curiously as Ahsoka locked eyes with Morai, and let out a small greeting with the convor, temporarily cutting the dreary mood. The little green-and-white patterned bird landed on her shoulders, its presence a soothing light, which she allowed herself to bask in; stroking the feathers lightly with the tip of her index finger .
'Morai. It's good to see you' she greeted softly to the little bird through the force, summoning all her compassion towards both the bird and the father as Morai nuzzled its beak against the crook of her neck.
Clearly no one had sensed her conversation, which she was content with, for now, but she couldn't help but notice the curious look on her grandmaster's face as the bird comforted her.
Knowing that what was about to happen, she conversed silently to the bird, as she knew the jedi beside her were getting ready to leave, she could sense it in their body language as they gazed at one another.
As they trudged down the bank with hesitance in their step, the longer Ahsoka and Morai's silent conversation went on, it appeared all previous tension left her face and stance, however the grief still wracked her bones.
So it was real.
Once she clambered down the bank, she noticed Obi-Wan's outstretched hand, that was ready to help her, given his selfless nature. The reminder of the people she lost to order 66 flared up a sharp wave of woe in her insides, and she tried hiding it in a sad smile, grateful for his kind gesture.
As the two jedi walked off, their eyesight was locked onto the ground, and they all had that all too familiar hunch in their shoulders, the look of a defeated soul who was helpless, as the situation had escalated beyond their control. The thought that she had a cause to play in this filled her with even more guilt, and against her better judgement, the togruta didn't want to stay as an unfriendly remind. She stopped in her tracks, as she turned around in hesitancy; to face the imposing figure of the father clutching his daughter close to him and appearing hopelessly lost.
Morai chirped and the old man's eyes left his daughter once again; watching the bird with mild interest, before reverting back to his own pain.
Communicating with the bird, she informed her that she wanted to speak with the father; send him one last message before their untimely return in yet another battle against the darkness.
Using Morai as a communicator, she sent out a heartfelt and sincere'I will make this up to you'
He just solemnly nodded in reply.
Fixing her gaze back onto the two biologically elder jedi, they wandered off in silence, the strikes of thunder being violent in the background.
Rex felt nothing. He felt at peace, lifted from the burden he carried from being a clone wars veteran and the guilt that followed from leading his brothers to their deaths on the battlefields, forgotten by time.
He always wondered if anyone would remember him, perhaps 'Soka would if she was still alive, scrounging her way though the rubble.
'Vod' Wake up!'
'Captain, briefing in 10 minutes, when we rendevouz with the Generals'
His vision was hazy, all he could make out was distortions of white with specs of orange and blue, as he felt the people around him scrambling for things.
"Rex" Fives called out to him, shaking him out of his stupor, his eyes lulled around the room, trying to make out the situation he awoke himself in.
As the blurried aspects of his vision cleared up, he let out an unrestrained gasp at the familiar faces that haunted his dreams; the brothers he failed to save.
"Fives?"
"The one and only" the arc trooper smiled back in confirmation, unaware of the memories flooding back into Rex's conscience. "Are we at a new republic medbay?" Rex asked, rubbing his head with his own rough, scratchy palms, which traveled down his face to pinch the bridge of his nose.
"You must have hit your head there Vod" fives laughed in amusement, "there is only one republic and it has been the same one as it ever has been for the past, the clankas can't get rid of us that easily."
"Wha..?" Rex mumbled, biting his tongue from bringing up the empire, and going full out aggressive on Fives for his mocking attitude of the last 30 ye-
His hand went to his face and met the smooth skin of a young body, the cricks in his neck was gone and the cracking in his back had disappeared. He looked down in not-very-well-contained panic, and noticed the dents in his armour was gone, with the blue paint on his chestplate sharp and fresh.
Was it a dream? he asked himself over and over, unconvinced that he had been sent back in time, considering how impossible that idea is.
Where is 'soka? Is she okay too?
He pondered quietly, trying to figure out if the former jedi had found herself in a similar predicament.
Fives' words about him hitting his head filled his mind with doubt that the memories in his head was ever experienced in the first place.
In an attempt to get up from the seat he found his juvenile body in, his foot made contact with a heavy and bulky object by his foot, producing one of his toe bones to click out of place.
Letting out a smooth but colourful variety of curse words, his eyes followed down his foot to the origin source of his pain.
His breath hitched in his throat, as he recognised the familiar markings on the backpack which he carried with him during the time of the temple collapsing.
Hoisting the bag up, he noticed the sleek and prestine symbol of the new republic, and the crisp condition as it rustled in his hands. Hesitantly pressing the zip open, all the belongings were left as neat and organised as it was right before the temple collapsed upon itself.
"Holy Kark" he cursed, as the realisation hit him full force that he had time travelled. He stroked his chin, where his beard would have been - a habit he had developed in his temporary retirement and exile - and muttered under the conversations of his brothers around him " 'Soka, I hope you made it back okay"
He could REALLY have used her optimism and experience right now.