TemperanceTales: I do not own Once Upon a time or the characters. I'm still working on Chapter 71 for Alison. I have not forgotten. It's just been a never ending problem fest where I had to rewrite the whole chapter (which was already 28 pages long, the rewrite is 33 pages as of right now) and that this pandemic has just presented set back after set back. But in the mean time, here is more side story. Warning, this actually touches upon some past trauma with each of the characters. It sad but the ending is bittersweet.
Chapter Two: Ocean sized Fears.
She was already regretting this.
Alison was walking down to the beach, dressed in a t-shirt and shorts. Belle had wanted to have picnic lunch on the beach. She had begged them for it and Alison had reluctantly said yes (with some additional prodding from Gold). Belle was dressed in an orange bathing suit and skirt, carrying the picnic basket on her arm. Gold was carrying the blankets as they made their way to the beach. Alison held the towels that Belle insisted on bringing that made the little girl nervous on what was to come.
"It's such a beautiful day," Belle sighed, taking in the sunshine, "It just seemed like such a waste to eat inside."
"I agree," Gold said, setting up the blankets on the beach. "But I am more excited for the delicious lunch you prepared."
"It's just chicken salad and egg salad," Belle said, rolling her eyes. She set the basket down and started unpacking it. Alison put down the towels and sat down on the blanket saying, "Yeah, but it's really good egg salad. Even Henry eats it and he doesn't really like eggs."
"This coming from the girl that eats like a bird," Gold teased as Belle handed out the plates. Alison stuck her tongue out only to have him playfully poke her side.
"Well I'm glad you and your friends like it so much," Belle said, putting out the food and taking off the lids. Gold kept poking Alison's side, causing her to giggle and poke him back. "Don't you both start! We haven't even started eating lunch yet!"
"Tell that to him," Alison said, poking him one last time.
"I don't see you stopping either, dearie," Gold rebutted.
"Well I'm stopping you both," Belle scolded, but her eyes showed her amusement, "Dig in."
"Don't need to tell me twice," Gold said, helping himself to the chicken salad.
"We never need to tell you twice," Alison said, rolling her eyes, "You could eat this entire meal by yourself if we let you."
Belle couldn't help but snort, repressing her giggles as much as she could. Gold looked at Alison offended as he said, "I very well could not."
"Tell that to the ice cream tub that was in the freezer," Belle teased, serving herself food.
"Really? The both of you?" Gold said, a hint of testiness entering his voice, "Need I remind you who baked and ate all the cookies before I even got home."
"They were not cookies, it was called biscotti," Alison scowled, "And you took too long to bring home dinner. We were hungry."
Gold rolled his eyes as Alison took a bite of her sandwich. She watched Gold as he finished serving himself and started eating. He was wearing a light button up shirt with tan swim shorts. Swallowing her food, she heard Gold say, "Take a picture, Dearie. It will last longer."
"I might have to," Alison said, "I can't get over you wearing anything other than a suit!"
"I wear other things, Alison Kinsleigh," Gold said exasperated.
"Very rarely," Belle said, "I swear all you wore in the other world was leather pants and silk shirts."
"See! It's not just me!" Alison said, "Although I'm kind of relieved you don't wear the leather pants anymore. You're too old."
Alison squeaked as Gold squirted her with water from his water bottle. Belle sighed as she said, "Rumpelstiltskin."
"What? She started it," Gold said, affronted, "I have to end it."
The three sat for the rest of lunch, chatting away peacefully. Soon most of lunch had been eaten and the three were stretched out lazily on the blankets. Alison was curled up into Gold, watching the clouds float across the sky. She had almost forgotten her initial fear when Belle wiped away her sweat on her brow saying, "That sun is wonderful, but it sure is hot."
"Well we are by the water, dear. We could go cool off in it." Gold suggested.
"Mmm," Belle said, staring out at the ocean, "That sounds rather nice."
Belle stood up, stretching her arms as Gold sat up, forcing Alison to sit up as well. Her stomach dropped as he asked, "What about you little leaf?"
"I think I will stay here," Alison said quickly, "I've still got lunch left."
"Suit yourself," Gold sighed, getting up and walking with Belle to the ocean. The two were soon wading into the water, laughing and chatting up a storm. Alison sighed defeatedly, watching after them for a good long while. She was not a fan of water or swimming or anything that took her one step closer to drowning. Shivering at the bad memories, she swiped a carrot off her plate and twirled it in her hand. Alison muttered before taking a bite, "I should have just stayed back."
"Alison, honey! Come enjoy the water!" Belle called over to her, "The food isn't going anywhere."
"I will pass, thank you," Alison said, in her usual polite but to-the-point voice. Belle pouted a bit but it didn't last long as Gold splashed water playfully at her. Alison sighed, nibbling on her carrot as she watched them. Maybe if she snuck back up into the cabin, neither of them would notice.
Alison looked up to see Gold staring at her with an impish smirk. Oh, that was not happening.
"No," Alison said, waving her finger at him as he got out of the water and made his way towards her, "No, no, no, no, no!"
She squeaked as Gold reached for her. She scrambled away, but the sand was the most inconvenient thing to run on. Luckily for her, she had magic.
"Little leaf!" Gold scolded, turning to see that she had poofed herself behind a large boulder.
"I said no, Rumpelstiltskin," Alison said, menacingly shaking her finger at him.
"It's just water," he said, exasperated.
"Water that pulls you and drowns you and that fish pee in," Alison insisted, "Think about that."
"May I remind you that you garden, a hobby that usually requires fertilizer," Gold rebutted, making his way over to her, "Think about that."
"Rum, it's fine," Belle said, her voice getting nervous, "She doesn't have to swim."
"See!" Alison said, "Go back to your girlfriend and have fun. I am going to go sit on the porch and read."
"Oh no you're not!" Alison screeched as Gold chased her around the rock. Gold grabbed her, lifting her up in his arms. Alison flung her arms around his neck in panic as she said, "Gold, I'm not kidding! I don't like swimming, I don't-!"
"Relax!" Gold scowled, his accent ever so apparent, "I'm not going to let you go. But I am not going to let you go hide in the house."
Alison didn't verbally protest but she couldn't help but feel the anxiety building inside her. Of all the things they wanted to do, it was the one thing she hated the most. She could hear the water rushing under them and soon against her. She gripped Gold tighter, burying her face into his shoulder. Tears burned down her cheeks, a lump forming in her throat. Gold stopped dead in his tracks, holding her with a little more gentleness.
"Alison," he said, his voice soft and confused. The anxiety was gripping her tightly now, keeping her silent. All she could do was shake her head profusely against him. Gold sighed, rocking her gently as she felt them being magically transported away. She felt him put her down, her feet touching the solid floor. She sniffed as he hugged her gently.
"Don't cry," Gold whispered softly, stroking her hair, "Please don't cry. I'm sorry, I don't know where this is coming from. We've walked and played on the beach together several times before."
"Yeah, but we weren't swimming in the water!" Alison hiccuped, "I don't like baths, I don't like swimming, I don't anything that reminds me of him…"
That last word broke up in her voice as she sobbed into his shirt. Gold closed his eyes tight, hugging her fiercely against him.
"Oh little leaf," Gold apologized bitterly, "I'm so sorry. Truly I am."
Alison sat on the window seat, staring out at the forest. The sun was setting, casting it's golden glow on the world. It had been a quiet sort of afternoon. Belle and Gold had given her space after the whole swimming incident, which made her feel even worse. She hadn't meant to spoil everything. But the thought of being submerged in water… she shuddered at even thinking about it.
"Alison?"
She looked over to see Belle standing in the doorway, dressed in a blue floral dress and sandals. She was smiling comfortingly at her, something that almost made her more nervous.
"Yeah?" Alison asked.
Belle reached out her hand, saying gently, "Come take a walk with me?"
Alison stared at her for a moment, biting her lip as she debated. Letting out a soft sigh, Alison got up and went over to her. Belle took her hand, leading her out of the house. Alison froze when she saw Belle leading her down to the beach.
"We're just going to stay on the sand," Belle said before Alison could say anything, "Promise."
Alison made a face, but followed her down the steps. Belle walked with her along the sand, far away from the ocean as they could get. Belle didn't say anything for the longest time. They just walked together, hand in hand for a while. It was oddly comforting, soothing whatever nervousness she still had.
"I always loved watching the ocean."
Alison looked up at Belle, who was staring out at the ocean. She swung their hands a little bit as she said, "Our castle was near the ocean. My mother and I used to walk on the shore every morning, smelling the breeze and watching the ships leave the harbor."
Belle's smile was very nostalgic and Alison was afraid to say anything to break it. However, the smile faded away as she said, "That stopped when the Ogre's Wars started. It wasn't safe to go out anymore. I was barely older than you at the time. My father had to go to the different forts. He took us one time to give the soldiers a morale boost I suppose. My mother was against it, but he told us it was necessary. We couldn't just hide away while the soldiers took all the risks."
Alison listened, watching as Belle stared ahead, as if lost in the memory. She continued on with her story without faltering, "We traveled via horses to try and decrease the noise. That's how the ogre's would find you. We had made it past the Eastern forest when we heard it. Screaming. Blood curdling screaming."
Belle shivered, letting go of Alison's hand to push back her hair. Alison swallowed as Belle said, "The Ogre's had found a family who lived in the forest. By the time we had gotten to them, all we found was a ruined house and a dead family."
Alison watched sadly as Belle wiped tears from her eyes. The wind began to blow softly, the sound of the crashing waves silencing Belle's sniffles. Shaking her head, Belle said, "I still can't help but freeze when I hear the ogre's roar or anything like it. All I can picture is that family lying in the rubble of their home… or my mother lying in the rubble of our library."
Her stomach clenched as she heard the break in Belle's voice. Alison couldn't help but wrap her arms around Belle's waist. Belle embraced her too, stroking her hair and leading her cheek on the top of the girl's head. They stayed like that for a while, neither of them paying any mind to the cool wind blowing through their hair or the ocean crashing into the shore. Alison breathed in deep before saying quietly, "Why are you telling me this?"
"We all have fears that haunt us. Me, you, even your Grandfather and Kathryn," Belle said softly, "It's okay to have them and to still be scared by them. That's nothing to be ashamed of and I never want you to be afraid to cry or be afraid to tell us about them. We love you all the same."
Alison shivered a bit, whether it was from the wind or the use of the word love she wasn't too sure. But she hugged Belle a little bit tighter, allowing some of her own tears to fall. Belle squeezed her tight before releasing her. The wind blew against them, a little more forcefully this time as Belle said, "We should head in before this wind blows us away."
Alison snorted, following Belle back to the cabin. They were quiet until they reached the stairs. Belle had started to climb them when Alison said, "Belle?"
"Hm?" Belle looked down to see the girl looking up at her with a sad yet grateful look.
"Thank you," Alison whispered softly.
Belle smiled warmly at her, reaching out to push back her hair before climbing the stairs. Alison watched her for a moment before looking back at the ocean. The waves were tumbling into the sand, the sounds of the ocean washing over her ears. Breathing in deep, Alison got one good smell of the ocean before climbing the stairs to enter the cabin.
The fire in the firepit flickered, crackling as the wood burned inside of it. The night had fallen on the world, the stars above flickering. Gold was outside, sitting in a lounge chair, skimming a journal in hopes to distract his mind. It wasn't working, as he couldn't help but feel guilty over the events from earlier today. Once again, he had pushed too far. He was always taking things too far.
When was he ever going to learn?
"Hey."
Gold looked over to see Alison coming out onto the deck, dressed in a sweatshirt and shorts. Gold closed his journal, sitting up in the lounge chair as she approached him.
"Hey," Gold said, "Belle still cleaning?"
"Nah, we finished that," Alison said, shaking her head, "She's heading up to get ready for bed, I think. Care if I join you?"
"Be my guest," Gold said, waving his hand in a weak flourish. Alison snorted, climbing onto the lounge chair and sitting on his lap. Gold adjusted himself so he was more comfortable. Reaching up, he tucked her brown hair behind her ears.
"Alison, about earlier," Gold started, "I'm sorry."
"I know," Alison sighed, "I'm sorry too."
Gold looked surprised, furrowing his brows as he said, "You have nothing to apologize for, sweetheart. I should have listened."
"You're right, you should have," Alison huffed, fiddling with the collar of his shirt before adding humbly, "I also should have just said why. I'm so used to having to run and fight that I forget that it's okay to just talk."
"Fear has a way of doing that to us," Gold said, miserably. Alison nodded staring out into the ocean absentmindedly. Breathing in deep, Alison said, "It kinda stinks. I love listening to it, smelling it, watching it… but I can't help but panic when I feel it. It just reminds me of every time anyone has ever tried to drown me…"
Alison's eyes became glassy. Whether it was from irritation or sadness Gold could not discern. She finally looked back at him as she said, "That's unfortunately happened a lot and Darren wasn't the only one."
"I'm sorry," Gold said, honestly and bitterly, "I'm sorry you went through any of that."
"It happened," Alison said, "There is no undoing it. At least I can hide behind the former Dark One now."
Gold rolled his eyes as he said sarcastically, "I feel so loved."
"Better believe it," Alison grinned playfully as Gold snorted. The two of them laid back into the lounge chair, Alison snuggling into his side. Gold rubbed her shoulder, staring up at the stars. Gold sighed as he said, "This was always your father's and mine favorite thing to do. We would disappear into the forest and sit on the cliffs of Greysback mountain. It was the only place you could see the stars without the fires of the Ogre Wars tainting it."
Gold fell quiet after that, his eyes growing distant. Alison watched him, a contemplating look coming over her. Lifting her head, Alison asked, "What are you afraid of?"
"Everything," Gold scoffed, which earned him a glare from his granddaughter, "But if you're just going to make me pick one, it would be losing my family."
Alison's glare turned to sadness as he looked down at her in all seriousness. He said miserably, "I've lost my family countless times in my life. My mother, my father, my former wife, my son… losing my family again is a fear that takes all others."
Alison wrinkled her nose as she said, "Your ex-wife doesn't deserve your pity."
Gold grimaced as he said, "I'm certainly not one to defend what she did. But she wasn't always like how you think of her Alison. In fact, your personality is much like how she used to be when she was your age."
Alison looked offended as Gold said, "I said used to, little leaf. People change due to experiences as they get older and Milah was one of them. We were friends when we were young. We both fell in love and married young."
Gold's expression went from nostalgic to tormented as he said, "The Ogres' Wars killed that love. I was called to the front lines and I saw the brutality of war. She was left alone to what I was told was a rough pregnancy and raising a baby soon after. She became prideful and I became a coward."
"You mean she became a jerk and you went through Hell," Alison said, heatedly, "Anyone that thinks War is anything else is stupid. I've seen what it does to people."
Gold gripped her tightly as he said, "I wish you hadn't. I forget that despite being only eleven, you lived a whole other life in Wonderland."
"It's okay, everyone does," Alison said, "Sometimes including me. I'm kinda known for it."
Gold snorted, the mood lightening at her little joke. Kissing the top of her head, he whispered, "I love you, my little Autumn leaf."
Alison leaned up again, kissing his cheek as she whispered, "I love you too, you old coot."
Gold wrinkled his nose as he said stoutly, "I want a better nickname."
"Too bad," Alison grinned cheekily, "You picked my nickname, I picked yours."
"We could pick new ones, you know."
"Nah," Alison shook her head witha mischievous glint in her eyes, "I like calling you old coot."
Gold tickled her, causing her to shriek loudly. She didn't bother trying to get away this time, after all she needed it as much as he did. Her laughter and eventually his laughter could be heard into the night, mixing with the peaceful sounds of night.