"How do you do that?" asked Malcom Pace.
"Monster," Theo replied easily.
Look, I didn't want to be a half-blood.
"Who does?" no one knew who muttered that.
If you're reading this because you think you might be one, my advice is: close this book right now. Believe whatever lie your mom or dad told you about your birth, and try to lead a normal life.
"Who would be reading this?"
"Mortals? I dunno, maybe they think it's fiction."
Being a half-blood is dangerous.
"Check." Stolls, Leo, Nico, and Thalia.
It's scary.
"Check." same as above.
Most of the time, it gets you killed in painful, nasty ways.
"Check!" adding Will and Piper!
If you're a normal kid, reading this because you think it's fiction, great. Read on. I envy you for being able to believe that none of this ever happened.
But if you recognize yourself in these pages - if you feel something stirring inside - stop reading immediately. You might be one of us. And once you know tht, it's only a matter of time before they sense it too, and they'll come for you.
"Who are they?" asked an Apollo camper.
Theo exchanged a dark look with the others at the couch, sans Luke, but didn't reply.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
"You didn't -"
"We were fighting a freaking Manticore, I didn't have time!" Theo said exasperated, cutting Nico off.
"You fought a manticore?" gasped Silena.
"Uh-huh. That was right before Annie got kidnapped."
"Say what?" demanded Annie.
"Don't call me that!" whined Annabeth.
Thalia nodded to Theo's statement. "Oh, yeh, I had to practically force him to eat or sleep!"
Annabeth leveled a glare at Theo who shrank back from his ex.
Hazel laughed and leaned against him, holding Frank's hand.
"Then, of course, there was that fight between Thals and Kelpy," said Nico thoughtfully.
Theo choked. "K-kelpy?!"
Reyna decided to keep reading.
My name is Percy Jackson.
"Really?" asked Leo with a smirk. "I thought it was RARA."
He got a sharp cuff on his head for that.
Im twelve years old. Until a few months ago, I was a boarding student at Yancy Academy, a private school for troubled kids in upstate New York.
Am I a troubled kid?
"Yes!" called out all the futures, and Grover.
Percy and Theo looked at their respective friends in betrayal.
Yeah. You could say that.
"See?" Thalia pointed out. "Even you agree with us!"
"I didn't write these!"
Theo felt that he'd have to say that a lot.
I could start at any point in my short miserable life to prove it, but things really started going bad last May, when our sixth-grade class took a field trip to Manhattan - twenty-eight mental-case kids and two teachers in a yellow school bus, heading to the Metropolitan Museum of Art to look at ancient Greek and Roman stuff.
"Greek and Roman?" asked Will. "that's foreshadowing, right there."
I know - it sounds like torture. Most Yancy field trips were.
"Drama queen!" sang Thalia.
"Shut up."
But Mr. Brunner, our Latin teacher, was leading this trip, so I had hopes.
"Mr. Brunner? But that's . . . " Annabeth trailed off before nodding in understanding, leaving the rest of the camp confused.
"You'll see," Theo said in a way of explanation.
Mr. Brunner was this middle-aged guy in a motorized wheelchair. He had thinning hair and a scruffy beard and a frayed tweed jacket, which always smelled like coffee. You wouldn't think he'd be cool, but he told stories and jokes and let us lay games in class. He also had this awesome collection of Roman armor and weapons, so he was the only teacher whose class didn't put me to sleep.
"You sleep in class?" asked Clarisse scornfully.
"You wouldn't?" Theo deadpanned.
I hoped this trip would be okay. At least, I hoped for once I wouldn't get in trouble.
Frank snorted. "You're not you if you don't get in trouble," he told his friend.
Theo just shrugged.
Boy was I wrong.
"See?"
See, bad things happen to me on field trips. Like at my fifth-grade school, when we went to the Saratoga battlefield, I had this accident with a Revolutionary War cannon.
"How do you have an accident with a cannon?" asked Chris Rodriguez.
Theo gestured to Reyna.
I wasn't aiming for the school bus, but of course I got expelled anyway.
Thalia choked on laughter, and the Stolls were looking at him in awe.
And before that, at my fourth-grade school, when we took a behind-the-scenes tour of the Marine World shark pool, I sort of hit the wrong lever on the catwalk and our class took an unplanned swim.
"Unplanned swim? Really?"
"I didn't write these!"
And the time before that . . . Well, you get the idea.
"Noooo, tell us more!" begged Nico and Leo.
Calypso and Will flicked their respective boyfriends on the head.
This trip, I was determined to be good.
All the way into the city, I put up with Nancy Bobofit, the freckly, redheaded kleptomaniac girl, hitting my best friend Grover in the back of the head with chunks of peanut butter-and-ketchup sandwich.
Silena screwed up her nose. "That's gross," she complained. "Who would eat that?"
Frank and Leo raised their hands.
"What?" Leo asked confusedly "It's good."
Grover was an easy target. He was scrawny. He cried when he got frustrated. He must have been held back several grades, because he was the only sixth grader with acne and the start of a wispy beard. On top of all that, he was crippled.
Grover snorted, nudging Percy. "Glad you think so highly of me," he said dryly.
Percy grinned. "I didn't write these."
Theo snickered.
He had a note excusing him from PE for the rest of his life because he had some kind of muscular disease in his legs. He walked funny, like every step hurt him, but don't let that fool you. You should've seen him run when it was enchilada day in the cafeteria.
A lot of people groaned. "Way to blow your cover, Goat Man," said Thalia.
Anyway, Nancy Bobofit was throwing wads of sandwich that stuck in his curly brown hair, and she knew I couldn't do anything back to her because I was on probation. The headmaster had threatened me with death by in-school suspension if anything and, embarrassing, or even mildly entertaining happened on this trip.
"How would that be your fault?" asked Michael Yew.
Percy and Theo both deadpanned.
"I'm gonna kill her," I mumbled.
Grover tried to calm me down. "It's okay. I like peanut butter." He dodged another piece of Nancy's lunch.
Piper stared at him while he blushed. "So do I, but not in my hair!"
"That's it." I started to get up, but Grover pulled me back to my seat.
"You're already on probation," he reminded me. "You know who'll get blamed if anything happens."
Leo winced in sympathy. "That sucks, dude," he said, nodding. He knew what that felt like.
Theo felt Luke retract his hand and looked at him, a question in his eyes.
Luke gently kissed Theo's crown and hugged him with one arm.
Looking back on it, I wish I'd decked Nancy Bobofit right then and there. In-school suspension would've been nothing compared to the mess I was about to get myself into.
"Yeah, no sh -"
"Shocker!" Leo jumped in before Thalia could finish her sentence. The futures all groaned and/or rolled their eyes.
Mr. Brunner led the museum tour.
He rode up in front in his wheelchair, guiding us through the big echoey galleries, past marble statues and glass cases full of really old black-and-orange pottery.
It blew my mind that this stuff had survived for two thousand, three thousand years.
"Longer," said Annie.
He gathered us around a thirteen-foot-tall stone column with a big sphinx on the top, and started telling us how it was a grave marker, a stele, for a girl about our age. He told us about the carvings on the side. I was trying to listen to what he had to say, because it was kind of interesting,
The futures all stared at Theo, who shifted uncomfortably.
but everybody around me was talking, and every time I told them to shut up, the other teacher chaperone, Mrs. Dodds, would give me the evil eye.
Mrs. Dodds was this little math teacher from Georgia who always wore a black leather jacket, even though she was fifty years old. She looked mean enough to ride a Harley right into your locker. She had come to Yancy half-way through the year, when our last teacher had a nervous breakdown.
"How much you wanna bet that breakdown was because of Per -Theo?" murmured Hazel to the rest of them.
Annabeth snorted.
"Suckers bet," said Nico.
"Aw, I'm not that bad!"
At the stares he got, Theo deflated a bit. "Am I?"
"Charon."
"Kronos."
"Phineas."
"Nereus."
"Porky."
Everyone looked at Fran weirdly while Theo smirked.
"Whatever Beast Boy," he said. "Next time I'll just leave you as a goldfish in that aquarium."
"Is that when you guys were covered with sharks and Coach Hedge was talking about how he kicked someone?" asked Piper.
Theo and Frank looked at each other and tried not to laugh.
"Y- yeah," answered Theo, obviously failing.
From her first day, Mrs. Dodds loved Nancy Bobofit and figured I was devil
spawn.
"Nope! That's Death Breath over here!"
"Hey!"
"Well . . . she isn't wrong."
"They are right."
Theo laughed at his cousins.
She would point her crooked finger at me and say, "Now, honey," real sweet, and I knew I was going to get detention for a month.
Thalia's mouth fell open "wait, wait, wait."
"Waiting."
"Is that- I mean -"
"Yup!"
Thalia shook her head in amazement. "That makes so much more sense now!"
"And don't worry, she calls everyone honey."
Looks were sent, but they didn't care.
One time, after she made me erase answers out of old math workbooks until midnight, I told Grover I didn't think she was human. He looked at me, real serious, and said, "You're
absolutely right."
"Grover!" various people called out, exasperated.
Mr. Brunner kept on talking about Greek funeral art.
Finally, Nancy Bobofit snickered something about the naked boy on the stele, and I turned around and said, "Will you shut up?"
It came out louder than I meant it to.
"Course it did," Calypso rolled her eyes.
The whole group laughed. Mr. Brunner stopped his story.
"Mr. Jackson," he said, "Did you have a comment?"
My face was totally red. I said, "No, sir."
Mr. Brunner pointed to one of the pictures on the stele. "Perhaps you'll tell us what this picture represents?"
"Five drachmas he doesn't know!" said Leo.
Theo's mouth dropped open in indignation.
I felt a flush of relief, because I actually recognized it.
Annabeth and Piper collected their winnings.
"That's Kronos eating his kids, right?"
"Dang," whistled Leo.
"That early?" asked Annabeth.
"Uh-huh."
"I know I said foreshadowing before, but this . . ." Will trailed off.
"Yes," said Mr. Brunner, obviously not satisfied. "And he did this because . . . ?"
I racked my brain. "Well . . . Kronos was king god, and-"
Thunder rumbled. Most people glanced up uneasily, but Theo just gave the sky the middle finger.
"God?"
"Titan," I corrected myself. "And . . . he didn't trust his kids, who were the gods. So, um, Kronos ate them, right? But his wife hid baby Zeus, and gave him a rock instead. And later, Zeus tricked Kronos into barfing up his brothers and sisters-"
"Ew!" said one of the girls behind me.
"Ew, is right," Drew sniffed, scrunching up her nose.
"And so there was a big fight between the gods and titans," I continued, "and the gods won."
Theo got stares.
Finally, Annabeth voiced the unasked question. "You summarized one of the biggest wars in history as 'a big fight'?"
"Classic," said Nico, shaking his head.
Some snickers from the group.
Behind me, Nancy Bobofit . . . ate his kids."
"And why, . . . real life?"
"Busted," muttered Thalia, the Stolls, Luke, Leo, Grover, Will, and Nico.
"Busted," Grover muttered.
Percy cracked a smile. "You all think like the evil goat!"
" . . . "
" . . . "
"What?" asked Theo. "he has evil thoughts for a goat."
Annabeth, Annie, Percy and Grover nodded.
"Shut up," . . . hair.
At least . . . radar ears.
"Horse ears," corrected Thalia.
"I see," . . . would you lead us back outside?"
"Happy note?" came many incredulous voices.
Chiron shrugged.
The class . . . acting like doofuses.
"Cause they are."
"Hey!" objected most of the boys to Thalia's comment.
"Hey is for horses," said Annabeth.
"Not Arion, he likes precious metals."
"And Blackjack likes donuts," agreed Theo.
Grover and I . . . Mr. Jackson."
I knew what was coming.
I told. . . sir?"
Mr. Brunner . . . seen everything.
"Not everything," disagreed Chiron. "Just a lot."
"You must . . . told me.
"About the titans?"
"About real life . . . it."
"Oh."
Thalia and Nico snickered. "Classic," they said in unison.
"What . . .Percy Jackson."
I wanted to be angry.
I mean, sure . . . correctly.
"But you know now, right bro?" asked Jason innocently.
"I dunno. Do I?" Theo answered.
I mumbled . . . funeral.
"I was."
He told me to go outside and eat my lunch.
The class gathered . . . Fifth Avenue.
Overhead, a huge storm . . . hurricane blowing in.
"Ol' Zeusy is maaaaaaaaaad," sing-songed Nico.
Nobody else seemed to notice. . . . seeing a thing.
Grover and I . . . loser freaks who couldn't make it elsewhere.
Thalia scrutinized Theo, noticing how he seemed to fold in on himself a bit. Luke pulled him closer.
"You're not a loser freak," she said firmly.
Theo bit his lip, like he didn't believe her. She sighed. She'd have to talk to him later.
"Detention?" Grover asked.
"Nah, . . . I'm not a genius."
Grover . . . apple?"
A lot of people laughed, to Grover's embarrassment.
I wasn't . . . it to him.
"Okay, somethings wrong," decided Annabeth.
"Why?" asked Castor.
"Because P - Theo's never not hungry."
I watched the stream of cabs . . . remind me that I'd have to try harder . . . she'd give me.
"Mama's boy," said Clarisse.
"And proud of it," chorused the two Jacksons. They grinned at each other.
Mr. Brunner . . . motorized cafe table.
Leo grabbed a notebook and a pen out of his toolbelt, frantically scribbling notes on how he could make it.
I was about to unwrap . . . Grover's lap.
"Bad move, lady," said Leo, not looking up.
"Oops." . . . liquid cheetos.
"Ew!" said most of the girls.
I tried to . . .a wave roared in my ears.
"A wave?"
I don't remember . . . me!"
"Wrong!"
Mrs. Dodds materialized next to us.
"How can she do that?"
"You'll see, said Theo mysteriously.
Some of the kids were whispering:
"Did you see - "
"- the water-"
"-like it grabbed her-"
"Okay, really?" Thalia demanded. "You didn't even know, how could you-?"
"Theo's one of the most powerful demigods, like, ever," explained Annabeth. "This doesn't surprise me.
I didn't know what they were talking about. All I knew was that I was in trouble again.
As soon as Mrs. Dodds made sure poor little . . . "Now, honey-"
"I know, I know," I grumbled. "A month erasing workbooks."
"I know!" said Theo and Percy together. "Never guess your punishment!"
That wasn't the right thing to say.
"No, really?" asked Connor sarcastically.
"Hey! Leave the sass to the sass master!"
That got him stares.
He sighed. "Persasseous Thesasseous Jacksass, not to be confused with jackass.
Annabeth leaned over and patted his arm.
"Wait!" . . . her."
Piper whistled. "You are one brave goat," she said admiringly.
Grover blushed.
I stared at him . . . to death.
"Course, she works for the ruler of the dead."
She glared at him so hard his whiskery chin began to tremble.
A couple people snickered.
"I don't . . . said.
"But-"
"You - will - stay - here."
Grover looked at me desperately.
"It's okay, man," I told him. "Thanks for trying."
"Honey," Mrs. Dodds barked at me. "Now."
Nancy Bobofit smirked.
I gave her my delux I'll-kill-you-later stare.
The futures all shivered.
"What?" asked Clarisse. "I bet it's not that bad."
Theo and Percy both leveled their glare at her, Percy's up full amp, and Theo's on the lowest setting.
It was still enough to make her pale.
Then I turned . . . to come on.
How'd she get there so fast?
I have moments
"You certainly have moments," Reyna agreed, interrupting herself.
The futures, Annie, and Grover all agreed.
like that a lot . . . misinterpreting things.
"It's not."
I wasn't so sure.
I went after Mrs. Dodds.
Halfway up the steps . . . in his novel.
"I was keeping an eye on them," Chiron defended himself from the stares.
I looked. . . entrance hall.
Okay, I thought. She's going to make me buy a new shirt for Nancy at the gift shop.
But apparently that wasn't the plan.
"I'd love it if anything was that simple," Theo complained, most of the others agreeing.
I followed her . . . Greek and Roman section.
Except for us, the gallery was empty.
"Beep! Beep! My monster senses are going off!" joked Beckendorf.
Mrs. Dodds stood . . . like growling.
Even without . . .pulverize it.
"She probably did," said Nico, nodding like he had just told them the secret of the universe.
"You've been giving us problems, honey," she said.
I did the safe thing.
Nico and Thalia coughed, like they were about to choke. "Kelp Head? Doing the safe thing?" exclaimed Thalia in disbelief.
"Impossible!" cried Nico.
Theo grumbled, "and you call me the drama queen."
He was happy that Nico was acting his age for once.
I said, "Yes, ma'am."
She tugged on the cuffs . . . away with it?"
"Away with what?" asked Miranda from the Demeter table.
"The bolt, duh," Chris rolled his eyes.
The look in her eyes was beyond mad. It was evil.
"No, really?" asked Nico sarcastically.
She's a teacher, I thought nervously. It's not like she's going to hurt me.
"Wishful thinking," muttered Theo.
I said, "I - I'll try harder, ma'am."
Thunder shook the building.
"We are not fools, Percy Jackson," . . . and you will suffer less pain.
"That doesn't sound good," said Luke nervously, hugging Theo tighter.
"Hey, I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere," promised Theo. " 'sides, the kid's here too, and he went through most of the stuff in this book as well."
"Most?"
"Uh . . ."
Luckily, Reyna decided to start reading again, to save him.
I didn't know what she was talking about.
All I could think . . . illegal stash of candy . . . dorm.
"Why have you never told us?" asked Leo and the Stolls in fake hurt.
Or maybe they realized . . . from the internet without ever reading the book and now they were going to take away my grade. . . read the book.
"I've read it now," he hurriedly assured the Athena kids.
"Well?" she demanded.
"Ma'am, I don't . . ."
"Your time is up," she hissed.
Then the weirdest thing happened. Her eyes . . . slice me to ribbons.
A lot of people yelped at the description, and Annabeth hauled Theo out of his seat, judo-flipping him and shaving her knee at his throat.
"A fury was your first monster?" she hissed, eyes flashing.
"Y -yes, can't breath - "
She lightened up but didn't take her knee away completely.
Grinning smugly, she said, "I did warn you, didn't I?"
A lot of people looked at them in confusion, so Reyna decided to explain. "It'll come up in one of the later books, but Theo disappeared for a while, and when he and Annabeth met up with each other again, she judo-flipped him and warned him to never do that again, and for us it's been about three months since he came here."
Understanding noises were made as Annabeth finally let him get up. Massaging his Throat, Theo made to go sit next to Luke, but Nico and Thalia grabbed him and sandwiched him between them. Theo grumbled but got comfortable, while Annabeth went to sit next to Luke.
Then things got even stranger.
"How does that happen?"
Mr. Brunner, who'd been . . . holding a pen in his hand.
"A pen? Asked everyone who hadn't seen Riptide.
"What ho, Percy!" he . . . through the air.
"What ho?!"
"So cool!"
Mrs. Dodds lunged at me.
With a yelp, I dodged . . . on tournament day.
"I wish I had him for a teacher," a lot of the campers grumbled.
Chiron smiled.
Mrs. Dodds spun toward me with a murderous look in her eyes.
My knees were jelly. My hands were shaking so bad I almost dropped the sword.
"Wimp," muttered Clarisse.
Percy glared at her, and she glared back.
She snarled, "Die, honey!"
Suddenly, Leo choked on laughter. He was laughing so hard, tears were coming out.
"Um, Leo?" asked Piper warily. "How is that funny?"
"Sorry, I just- I imagined a fury lunging towards honey, screaming die!"
Everyone laughed at this mental image.
And she flew straight at me.
Absolute terror ran through my body. I did the only thing that came naturally: I swung the sword.
Everyone stared at Theo and Percy. Finally, Theo asked, "what?"
"How does that come naturally?!" burst out Jason.
Theo shrugged, clearly uncomfortable.
The metal blade hit her shoulder and passed clean through her body as if it was made of water. Hiss!
"A water reference? Really?" deadpanned Thalia.
Mrs. Dodds was a sand castle in a power fan. . . eyes were still watching me.
I was alone.
There was a ballpoint pen in my hand.
Mr. Brunner wasn't there. Nobody was there but me.
My hands were still . . . mushrooms or something.
"No," chorused Katie and Miranda before anyone could ask.
Connor, Travis, and Leo pouted.
Had I imagined the whole thing?
"Nope!"
I went back outside.
It had started to rain.
Grover was sitting by the . . . she said, "I hope Mrs. Kerr whipped your butt."
"Who?" asked the seven minus Theo plus Will, Calypso, Thalia, the Stolls, and some others.
I said, "who?"
"Oh no! We think like Percy!" cried out his cousins.
Theo scowled, but his eyes showed that he wasn't really mad.
"Our teacher. Duh!"
". . . that makes no sense," blinked Piper.
Hazel shook her head. "It's the Mist," she explained.
"Ah," nodded Piper in understanding.
I blinked. We had no . . . was talking about.
She just rolled her eyes and turned away.
I asked Grover where Mrs. Dodds was.
He said, "Who?"
"I'll bet you that Percy would have been convinced, but Grover let it slip," Will said to Calypso who blinked and said, "no deal."
Will pouted.
But he paused first, and he wouldn't look at me, so I thought he was messing with me.
"Called it!" said Will.
"Not funny man," I told him. "This is serious."
"You're not black," said Leo, finally looking up.
"You're not named after a constellation, either," Piper agreed.
"Maybe not, but Sirius is the best way to go," Theo said solemnly.
"Amen," Agreed Frank and Nico.
Annabeth rolled her eyes.
Thunder boomed overhead.
I saw Mr. Brunner . . . as if he'd never moved.
I went over to him.
He looked up, a little . . . Mr. Jackson."
I handed Mr. Brunner the pen. I hadn't even realized I was still holding it.
"Sir," I said, "where's Mrs. Dodds?"
He stared at me blankly. "Who?"
"The other chaperone. Mrs. Dodds. The pre-algebra teacher.
He frowned and leaned forward . . . are you feeling alright?"
"Now that's how you lie!" exclaimed Travis, Connor, Luke, and some others nodding in agreement.
"That's the chapter," said Reyna.
"I'll read," said Luke.
He opened the book to the right page and was about to speak, and then closed it. He opened his mouth again, and finally got out, "um, is this . . ."
Theo leaned over to see. "Oh! Um, yeah, that's right.
"Chapter two: three old ladies knit the socks of death."
Whoo! First chapter done! I know I made Nico a bit OOC, but, c'mon, he's 14! And Luke . . . he's one of my favorites, okay? Review or PM me if you want any other characters, like Sally and Paul, maybe, or Gabe, or Clarisse, or anyone else! You can even ask for Magnus or Sadie! (If you do want Magnus, just know that I'm gonna put Alex in their too, she/he's my favorite character from Magnus Chase!)
Again, review if you like, or need something to be explained, like why Percabeth broke up, or how Theo got there in the first place.
And yes, I did do the sass, thank you. Not the kwami, though.
-Bug out!