Chapter 2: Bad News Pit
Master Hand browsed through his gigantic phone since you know, he's a giant floating hand. He browsed through Instacart to get some groceries for the fighters for the time being. Despite currently being in the middle of the pandemic, the Smash Mansion continued to receive new fighters and residents. Recent new faces consisted of Pyra and Mythra along with Rex and the others of Alrest in the Xenoblade 2 universe.
He was able to check out the groceries with ease.
Meanwhile, Pit was browsing DoorDash which was him just logged into Palutena's account because she insists they use the same account because she's technically his mother figure. He looked around, browsing aimlessly until he saw it... the most magical restaurant ever... CHILI'S! His eyes lit up in anticipation as he clicked it! Aha! Now he can finally have his crispy chicken crispers with French fries and corn on the cob!
As he went to process the order something happened...
ACCESS DENIED!
DUN DUN DUN!
Pit's eyes widened as he almost dropped his phone. "No... no... noooooooo! This can't be!"
He tried to reorder again and again, but he was denied! There was no way it was Palutena low on funds because she's a goddess and is obviously loaded. Dark Pit managed to pass by and saw his twin in distress. While he found Pit's pain hilarious most of the time (since they're brothers), at the same time, he could not help but be concerned. He walked towards the other angel, raising an eyebrow.
"What in the world is with you Pit-stain?" he said.
"Pittoo! this is an emergency- Chili's is denying my order!" Pit answered, hyperventilating a bit.
Dark Pit crossed his arms. "Seriously? That's your emergency?! I expected it to you know, actually be a real issue but nope, just something stupid. And besides, Chili's isn't even that great. It's mediocre at best."
Pit gasped as if his brother said something extremely offensive. "Don't you ever insult chili's ever again!"
"Fiiiiine," Dark Pit said flatly. "Anyhow, try ordering from another place. I'm curious about something."
Pit nodded. He decided to attempt ordering some chicken nuggets from McDonalds. When he was at the checkout, he was denied! It was as if someone or something had banned the entire Smash Mansion location! Oh no!
Palutena came by, noticing the two angels were in distress, or rather, Pit was as opposed to Dark Pit.
"Is everything alright?" she asked gently.
"No Lady Palutena," pit began, "I think someone or something has prevented the entire Smash Mansion from obtaining any delivery of sort! I mean, Pittoo's trying UberEATS right now and it won't let him go through either!"
"Interesting..." Palutena tapped her chin for a few seconds. She was in deep thought before something clicked. "Perhaps we may need to make a journey to the headquarters. In the meantime, I'll let Master Hand know of this."
Pit nodded while Palutena left to Master Hand's office. He glanced over to his brother who shrugged.
"Perhaps it's time to interrogate the nerds of Smash Bros!"
With those words, Pit and Dark Pit went to assemble who they deemed to be some of the most intelligent and dorkiest members of the roster. Such consisted of their reading teacher professor Byleth, the tactician twins Robin and Reflet, Samus Aran due to growing up in a world full of technology, to even Shulk whom Dark Pit had to drag out of the library despite Fiora wanting to kick his ass.
As Byleth made their way towards the study hall to meet up with Pit, Sothis floated alongside them. Despite being newcomers from the first DLC pack, Sothis was able to sense that Shulk was the former vessel to some bitchface god. She turned towards Byleth.
"Hmmm," she began, "something tells me that angel might have to work alongside the Lord of the Underworld to figure out this endeavor."
Byleth nodded. Sothis was onto something.