Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!

"Damnit... damnit..."

Years and years of work to create the Philosopher's Stone, the ultimate form of Alchemy, a level of alchemy that could be considered reaching into the divine to perform the ultimate transmutation. Minato had worked most of his life towards this goal, and nearly all of his notes on the subject were failures where he didn't even come close to creating. He was 9th Rank Alchemist, he was the highest rank that could be obtained in his craft. He was a professional among professionals, to the point that he knew that if anyone could achieve the completed version of the legend, then it would be him.

He had created life before.

"What is the big deal about this stone again?"

"Eternal Youth, the ability to turn any metal into silver, gold, and platinum, and transform crystals into rare crystals. It's the path to infinite wealth and youth, it's also capable of being an amazing magical focus... the best magical focus." Minato explained once more to his impatient wife. It was nearly impossible for him to get her to understand.

She was a Potion Maker.

Where he was a 9th Rank Alchemist, she was a 9th Rank Potion Crafter, she could make potions that almost reached into the territory of god. It was through the combined efforts of their crafts that allowed them to concieve their child Naruto.

"I just don't get why... there are potions that can grant youth, and if you live long enough, you're get tons of money eventually." Kushina couldn't see the point behind it. She was currently going over the notes thatg she created for her newest potion. A potion that would allow... well it would be best not talked about even in her own mind. "... After all, Potions that focus on Necromancy aren't exactly... well accepted." Kushina muttered to herself.

She was reaching into forbidden territory.

"AaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAH!?"

"Was that Naruto screaming?" Kushina asked as she blinked. She looked at Minato, who was slightly confused as well. Naruto's voice did have a slight feminine quality to it, but that scream was FAR more feminine sounding than they had ever heard their son sound like. It was hard to believe that sound could be their son. "Minato?" Kushina asked.

They heard the sounds of stomping as somebody started to come down the stairs and towards them in a hurry, and they shared a glance.

The door burst open.

Jaws dropped.

"What did you two do to me in my sleep!? I TOLD you my body is off limits for experiments!"

"... Adorable..." Kushina whispered as she looked at Minato, who had dropped his coffee on the floor in shock.

Their son had physically changed.

He was now visible shorter than before, and his body was visibly thinner and more feminine, his muscles now about as large as a woman's muscles. His pajamas didn't fit him properly, so he was holding his pants up with one of his hands, and his top was hanging off his shoulders.

"Kushina!" Minato shouted at Kushina. "You said you weren't going to make Naruto drink your potions in his sleep anymore!" Minato snapped at Kushina instantly when he realized that Naruto was under the effects of something strange. "You turned our son into a daughter!" Minato pointed at Naruto as he stood up.

Kushina looked stunned.

"... I didn't do this... YOU did this and you want to put the blame on me! You used Transmutation Alchemy to transform his body, obviously! You stayed up all night last night, it had to have been you!" Kushina pointed the blame right back at Minato, the finger of blame pointed in his direction instead of at herself. "I stopped experimenting with him once he hit puberty, since strong hormones and potions don't mix well!" Kushina even explained her excuse for why it could not be her.

There was a pause for Naruto as he looked between the two of them, and he looked down the front of his pants.

"... I'm still a boy, actually..."

"A Trap, you turned our son into a trap!" Kushina and Minato pushed the blame on each other.

That was the only explanation that could possibly make sense.

-5 Hours Later-

"Ho-holy crap... this isn't... this level of Potion Making isn't possible through modern potion skills." Kushina stated with her jaw dropped as she looked at the remains of the potion in Naruto's system. She was the highest rank of Potion Crafter, and this was beyond even her understanding of the subject. "How much research went into this... no... more than that... this potion takes all factors of outside interferance into account. This is Divine Rank Potion Crafting!" Kushina leaned back in her chair with her eyes widened in shock.

Minato was bleeding from his nose.

"This isn't potion making... this is Alchemy... but... no... this isn't possible... Naruto's blood..." Minato couldn't make heads or tails of this.

This was Alchemy Perfection.

Each and EVERY one of Naruto's blood cells were infused with particles from a COMPLETED Philosopher's Stone. Naruto's very bones were showing signs of being infused with completed stones as well. This was Divine Rank Alchemy, and even beyond that since somebody had not only managed to CREATE a fucking philosopher's stone, but also MASS produce enough of them to be able to infuse Naruto with so many of them that his body was producing a liquid version of the stone in his blood cells.

Naruto's blood was liquid perfection alchemy.

As he tried to observe it and analyze it, his brain couldn't comprehend what he was trying to understand. It was beyond what his notes could ever compare to, and he could only marvel in awe at the sheer complexity of the alchemy before him.

"Alchemy... this isn't alchemy Minato, this is pure potion making." Kushina argued Minato.

She started to get to work.

So did Minato.

"The effects are becoming permanent, if we don't cure Naruto soon, he's going to stay like this for eternity... his body is producing eternal youth. Look at this... LOOK at this!" Minato put a drop of Naruto's blood on some metal, and the second Naruto's blood touched the metal, it started to transform into gold.

Kushina stared at that.

"No, it's POTION making! His blood is infused with the most complicated potion you could ever imagine... it's a multi-layered, multi-functional potion. Look at THIS!" Kushina grabbed a puppy that she was saving for some experiments, and she put a few drops of Naruto's blood into it's mouth. Minato watched with her as the puppy got larger, and it started to transform it's body. It's front half became more muscular, while it's tail transformed into a snake head, with bat wings growing from it's body. "This potion is so complex that any cure, ANY cure needs to take in order 1,000,000 possible potion combinations in order to just begin to try and make a cure. We have to work together to make a potion to cure this." Kushina didn't know who did this to her son.

This was some serious stuff though.

Naruto's blood was Eternal Youth, Monster Creation, and Metal Transmutation. If they didn't cure their now trap son, then all of the effort that they were going through to remain secret from magicians was going to go to waste.

"We need Mom's help, we needed her help but to combine Potion Making and Alchemy together in order for you to give birth to him... Oh lord... this isn't Potion Making OR Alchemy... this is both..." Minato lost all hope instantly when he realized that they didn't have enough time.

Not just that.

They didn't have enough time to fix this before the effects became unfixable and Naruto's body became immune to potions that could change him or alchemy to change him back. They did not have enough time to study what they needed to study, and the worst part of it was that even if they had the time, they didn't have the skills needed to do anything.

Whoever did this was beyond their understanding.

Even they, as the highest levels in their fields of study, couldn't even begin to comprehend the methods or the things they were looking at. Somebody had masterfully taken potions and alchemy, fused them together, and then proceeded to reach into the lands of the divine to create something that was so complex, that it exceeded what the normal mind was capable of creating.

"This... this is the ultimate perversion of Alchemy and Potions... This Perverted Potion Prank..." Kushina whispered with horror.

They failed as parents.

"This... I don't think I've ever seen something as divine or as perverse as this. Should we tell... we have to move. Naruto's friends, they are normal people, they wouldn't understand Naruto's knew appearance. We have to start over, we need to move to a new town... we need to keep Naruto a secret from the world of mages." Minato worked his mind into overdrive. He got out his maps of the many areas that they could move to.

They had 3 options in Japan.

Tokyo, Kyoto, and Kuoh.

Tokyo because the high population would allow them to remain hidden, Kuoh because it was devil owned territory which would allow them to easily blend in, and finally Kyoto because his adopted mother lived there and they would have a strong support network. There were downsides to each one thing.

Tokyo had a lot of secret mage societies because of the high population, Kuoh had devils in it which was both a plus and a minus, and being around youkai constantly meant putting their guards up to make sure the secret didn't leak to the supernatural world since some youkai could be spies for other factions.

"... This..." Kushina killed the monster puppy with a knife to the skull out of pure frustration that she could do nothing to help her son. "How dare... how fucking dare somebody experiment on MY son!" Kushina stood up and raged.

"You do-"

"Of course I do, it's a potion crafter's job to prepare experiment on their own children to make them even better than other children. My father AND mother experiments on me growing up too, but to experiment on somebody else's child!? That's some fucked up shit!" Kushina was a potion maker through and through, and though they didn't have the same morals as other people, she had her own set of morals.

This crossed the line.

"...I'm going to give Naruto the bad news." Minato got ready to go and tell Naruto the horrible news.

That there was nothing they could do to help him.

Chapter End!
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