Appointment #2

"New room?" Bucky asked as he walked into the office.

"I like this one better." Unlike the office that Dr. Raynor had been occupying, the chairs and couch were overstuffed and a few brightly colored throw pillows were tossed about. Instead of a mural of trees, the wall featured large photos of the seaside and waves crashing on a beach. It was the room she preferred when she was counseling the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents who had suddenly returned after the Snap. She had also found that the casualness of the area generally resulted in people relaxing more.

"Less formal, more comfortable, don't you think?"

"I guess," he replied slowly turning his head to take it all in.

"That chair is amazing," Alex said and pointed to a large oval-shaped bean bag. "It almost feels like you're floating. Try it sometime. You'll thank me."

Bucky glanced over in the direction she pointed and immediately vetoed the suggestion in his head. Without hesitation, he deliberately sat on the couch. She had moved the furniture around a bit in an effort to create a less structured atmosphere and her chair was now positioned slightly diagonal from where he was sitting. Alex settled into the cushions and crossed her legs at the ankle. Her bright pink Chucks were in stark contrast to his somber dark clothes.

"Have you been having any nightmares since you've gotten yourself a new therapist?" she asked with a smile.

"No."

"Would you tell me if you were?"

"Of course. That's why we're here… to talk about things like that," Bucky said with evident sarcasm.

"We can talk about whatever you want. Books; music; I can recommend movies you might have missed. If you ever want to ask me questions, feel free."

Her words were met with silence and he looked off over her shoulder at the far wall. "Where do you go?" Alex said.

"When I'm not here?" he asked with obvious confusion.

"You're staring at that wall but you're not seeing it. Are you picking out paint? Trust me, you don't want to live with this color on your walls."

Silence descended on the room again, although his attention was now directed on her and off the wall. Alex even thought she detected a slight hint of amusement in his eyes. "Going down the rabbit hole seems like a great idea… until you do it. Then it's really hard to pull yourself out," she said.

"Are you a doctor?" Bucky asked suddenly. Alex was surprised by the question but was happy to have some engagement from him.

"No. Masters in psychology. I am licensed if that concerns you and no, you're not the first person I've worked with. I can probably get you a reference or two if you want."

He shook his head, "My sessions with Dr. Raynor weren't like this."

"She's more by the book. Probably her Army background," she surmised. "My sessions are a bit more free form."

"What about the rules she gave me?"

"Yeah, those," Alex said somewhat dismissively. "Personally, I think everyone should be following number one and two, but rules... umm, not my thing."

"No…rules?" He repeated slowly. Bucky peered at her as if to see if she was serious before looking at the floor.

"If you really want some, I'll give you some. You'll end up wishing you stopped with Raynor's." When he looked up, he found himself facing Alex's steely gaze and serious expression. The change in her demeanor threw him off. He opened his mouth and started to say something but quickly thought better of it and leaned back on the couch.

Her focus remained fixed. "I'm good," he assured her.

"Now that we have that settled, tell me about your family."

After a slow, measured start, Bucky went on to tell Alex about his family and growing up in Brooklyn. She posed a question here and there, in between his pauses. Some questions were developed from what she had read in his file and others from pure curiosity. As he spoke, Alex watched his demeanor change and the air of tension that surrounded him dissipate. Even when she wrote a sentence or two in her notepad, he let it pass without remark. The memories helped him relax, even if he didn't realize it. In the middle of their conversation, he asked a question about her family. Alex shared that she was an only child and was originally from Vermont.

"Mountains. Farms. Covered bridges. Very similar to Brooklyn," she said with a laugh. "It was… is… a really nice place to just get away from it all."

She then turned the conversation to a more somber topic. "Your family didn't know that you survived the war?"

He shook his head and Alex expressed her condolences with sincerity. Silence overtook the room and Bucky looked out the window for a moment before stating that given his history it was probably better that way.

"Stop framing yourself like that," Alex said earnestly. "Look at me, James. You are perfectly good, great, okay… whichever you like… as you are right now."

Her sentiments were met with a semi-snort and shake of the head. "You. Are. I read your file. I know."

"You don't know."

"I know that Sam trusts you. I know that Steve Rogers thought you were worth fighting for. I also know that a whole lot of people think very highly of you. If they didn't, you and I wouldn't be sitting here right now."

Bucky stared at her. He leaned forward and uttered two words. "Court mandated."

"My name isn't in that government hat and, for the record, I didn't piss off my boss either. If you want to get back to the world, I can help you. But… you have to be willing to do some work."

"No rules?" he asked.

Alex paused to consider it for a moment. "No rules. But…"

"I knew it."

"But… you can't go out there and do whatever you please because they'll be coming for both of us. If that happens, I'll make sure we're in the same cell so these sessions can occur 24/7. Choose wisely."

"How's it going?" Nick Fury asked Alex as soon as she answered the phone. She was still sitting in the same chair and had been making a few notes for herself after Bucky left. Even though she was alone in the room, she instinctively closed the notebook.

"Do not tell me you're pulling him for some mission."

"My day is going well, thanks for asking Alexandra," Fury said. "I take it you've made progress?"

"I've only met with him twice," she impressed upon him.

"And?"

"And, you switched therapists on someone who has been trained to notice every little thing."

"I had cause," he said loudly.

"You're the spy. If it were you, would you trust me?" Alex asked.

"No," he said succinctly. "So, you're giving up?"

"You know me, I love a challenge. I just need some time."

"Time is something we do not have. Do I need to brief you on the situation again?"

"We did have something resembling a conversation today. Small steps," Alex replied.

"Anything I should know?"

"I've never known anyone who could sit so still for so long."

"Not what I'm looking for."

"I may not be a doctor but I do have client privileges. What we talked about stays between us. If I think he's a danger to himself or someone else, you'll be the first person I call," she said.

"Since I'm so close by, that's very reassuring," Fury said with more than a touch of sarcasm.

"That's the way it is. Don't like it, put someone else on this… or call back Dr. Raynor."