If you're reading this, much love. The love is meant so much, because I literally MISSED THE INJUSTICE 2 SALE ON STEAM TO WRITE THIS CHAPTER SO FEEL IT FEEL THE LOVE MOTHER TRUCKERS DO YOU TRUCKIN' FEEL IT BRUTHERRRRR?
EN-EN-ENJOI
…
The end of vacation meant life went back to normal for the Potter family. James Sr. and Sirius returned to work at the Auror's office, Lily went back to St. Mungo's and had to work through a backlog of patient's files. Of course, they still hadn't gotten any letters from their friends from Hogwarts, and it was beginning to depress Harry. He had promised to write Ron and Hermione, and vice versa, but he had sent them each five letters already, and they were all being ignored.
James Dean, Travis, and Brian were worried about Kiara. She had promised to write them, too, and James was beginning to get angry. The clear insinuation they got last year was that her was father was abusing her, if not full on beating her whenever she was home. James Dean was worried sick, but he knew he couldn't just go to his father with it, at least not yet. He needed clear, iron-clad proof.
Otherwise, it'd have just been hearsay.
With nothing better to do, and having the run of everything almost every day, they had made full use of their free time and open house. Travis and Harry were excited for the upcoming school year, as Harry was the rising star Seeker for Gryffindor's Quidditch team, and Travis, fully ready for his first allowed attempt to tryout for Ravenclaw's, got a new Nimbus 2000 of his own for his birthday. They spent as much time as possible at the pitch, practicing.
James and Brian, however, had found a new pet project for themselves. They had both been gifted electric guitars and amplifiers for their own birthdays. James, having been gifted a beautiful and curvaceous electric-acoustic Gibson ES-335, and Brian a sleek and sharp BC Rich Mockingbird. They had shredded their way through so many songs that they were now obsessed with finding a way to be able to take their newfound musical power to school with them.
"So," James muttered as he sat in the workshop, huddled over the salvaged equipment before them. "The key here is, magic disrupts muggle electronics, but not magical radios, so we gotta scrap all the crap from the muggle stuff that isn't gonna work and fortify the stuff that will with enchantments and spell work, and then bring the speaker and the receiver together to make it work."
"Right," Brian nodded, referencing the manual for how magical powered objects work. "But what's the power source gonna be? Batteries are outta the picture, and so is the entire AC-DC current system for that matter. There isn't any way to actually power objects aside from radios since they are powered by latent magical shrouds and the received magical signals from the broadcaster."
"That..." James muttered, looking over to one of his books. "Is an excellent question."
"Is there some sort of magical battery?" Brian theorized. "Or maybe a way to protect the electronics from magical interference?"
"Christ, I dunno," James muttered as he flipped through pages. "I hope to hell somebody smarter than us figures it out before magical kind tries to go to space, because damn if you aren't gonna fly around in the void on a broomstick with a bubblehead charm."
"Well, let's temper the expectations for space travel and focus on making the guitar amp work, Carl Sagan."
"Just because you can't multitask doesn't mean I can't," James muttered, before turning to his brother. "Besides, if all else fails, we can just jump inside your head, you get lost in space well enough."
"Shaddup and read the damn book."
"Well, we're in luck," James muttered as he read on. "...And also SOL."
"How can we be in luck and outta luck all at the same time," Brian griped.
"There is a way to power it magically," James responded, rapping the page of his book with a knuckle. "But only theoretically. There currently isn't anything that will store the magical energy, convert it to electricity, and produce what we want it to do."
"So where do we get something that does?"
"In the future," James replied mournfully, tossing the book on the workbench with an air of resignation. "It doesn't exist yet."
They were not deterred. Instead, they spent the rest of the day studying up on all the books on Magical Theory their mother had in her small library, specifically on the stabilization of electrical currents when interacting with magical fields. It hadn't really been their mother's line of interest, so the texts they did manage to find was lean on the subject.
Harry and Travis had absconded off to the local hidden Quidditch pitch to practice, so the house had been quiet, save for the padding of Constance(the Potter family's half-knezle guard cat) as she patrolled the house. It was late in the evening when their Dad came home, and it was at dinner, which was takeout fish and chips, when they sprang on him.
"Dad," James said as he swallowed a fry(he refused to call them chips.)
"Yeah?"
"We need to visit Arthur Weasley."
James Sr. choked on his cod. "Whatever for?"
"James!" Lily chided him. "Arthur is a good man!"
"And a weird one," James Sr. defended.
Lily scowled at him. "And Harry is best friends with his son, want to inject that into their relationship?"
"No," James Sr. growled. "He is just obsessed with muggle technology and culture to the point of it being weird. 'Sides, he's had all the chances in the world to move up in the Ministry, provide a better life for his family, and yet he continues to waste away in the Misuse of Artifacts office like a bum, just because he likes muggles-"
"And you don't?"
"'Course I do! He's just unhealthily obsessed with them! Besides, how do we know the Weasley's actually want to see us outside of work? The boys haven't received any owls from their friends from school."
"I'm sure there's a good reason," Lily assured, giving a downcast Harry a sympathetic look.
James growled at the thought of Kiara being forced to be shut away from society. Travis's own look darkened, as he, too, probably thought about what she was going through at the hands of her father.
"This is lovely," James Dean proclaimed, shaking his hands in the air and projecting a sarcastic smile. "We're getting our feelings out there in such a healthy way… as a family... which still doesn't help me and Brian's dilemma in the slightest, so if we could work out a way for us to go see him...?"
"Brian and I," Brian corrected quietly.
"Shut it."
"What do you need Arthur's help for?" James Sr. pressed, dipping his fish in some sauce.
"Magical Theory," James Dean and Brian answered.
"Well, not to brag," James gloated with a grin that clearly meant that he thought he was going to get out of talking to his eccentric coworker. "But I happen to know quite a bit about Magical Theory."
"Great!" James grinned sarcastically, giving his father a challenging look. "So you understand the nuances of biharmonic synergy between electrical and magical currents!?"
"..." James Sr. silently mutter and looked down.
"Yeah, I think Mr. Weasley would be a great help for our project."
"... I'll talk to him. We have to join him on another one of his foolish, idealistic crusades tonight, anyways..."
"Raids," Lily corrected her husband. "His work is important, too, y'know. Just because he doesn't work in the flashier fields for the Ministry means he's any less!"
"Does this mean we get to visit Ron?" Harry asked, excited.
"No," James Sr. answered.
"Absolutely!" Lily overrode.
"Haha, nice," James muttered.
"Awesome!" Travis cheered.
"Brilliant!" Harry smiled.
"Brilliant…" James Sr. grumbled.
…
The next morning, breakfast was interrupted by a car honking. James stood and went to the front door, only to open it up to the grinning faces of the Weasley Twins.
"Fred!" James exclaimed, tossing fives. "George!"
"Alright, James?" Fred asked, returning the gesture. "Been ignoring our owls all summer and you suddenly decide you need our dad, of all people?"
"I haven't gotten any owls," James said.
"We've sent six," they chorused, scowling and crossing their arms across their chests.
"Ron!" Harry called out, storming through the door.
"Harry!" Ron hugged him back. "I was getting worried, Hermione and I have been writing you all summer!"
"I have a theory about that," Travis added as he stepped into the landing. "But we can talk about that later. What's up, pal?!"
"And its good to see you all again," Arthur Weasley greeted with a cheerful face before looking at James Dean. "Your father told me you wanted to see me?"
"Yeah," James nodded as he bit into his biscuit. "We' twyin' to so'v the magico-ewectwic synewgy pwobwem."
Arthur furrowed his brow. "Whatever for?"
"Wait," James Sr. interrupted, looking from Arthur to James Dean. "You understood that? And what have I told you about speaking with your mouth full?"
"Sowwy," James giggled.
"Of course I do," Arthur laughed. "The magical-electric synergy problem is the very thing keeping muggle electronics from working in magical communities, especially places like Hogwarts. It's an experimental theory many have tried and failed to put into practice for almost a century… It's also why there currently isn't isn't any eletricty at all up at the school or Hogsmeade, it simply woon't magical energy interferes and overrides electrical energy."
"Uh... huh," James Sr. nodded, before turning to James and Harry. "Well, have fun, don't do anything rude at the Weasley's, have fun, yada yada!"
"We're going over to the Weasley's?" James and Harry chorused in shock.
"They're going to come the Burrow?" the Weasleys chorused in excitement.
"They're coming to the Burrow," Arthur confirmed with a smile.
It took them all little more than twenty minutes to have their luggage, skateboards, all four guitars, amplifiers, owls, brooms, pranking equipment, and books packed. They filed out to the front drive where they packed it into an old, battered, turqoise Ford Anglia that had been magically enchanted to have more room on the inside. They said bye their father, hugged and begrudgingly kissed their mother, and were buckled in before Arthur could tell them to. With a wave to James Sr. who awkwardly waved back, they were off.
When they were out of Barnet and into the country, Arthur turned to James in the backseat and winked. With a flick of the shifter, the car lifted off the ground, and as Fred pushed a nob on the dashboard, the outside of the car became invisible. They took off, narrowly missing the roof of a barn.
"Okay, I'm impressed," James breathed, poking his head out the window to look at the invisible car.
"Brilliant!" Harry laughed from the other side, slapping the now see-through door panel.
"So, how come you all haven't been answering our letters?" Ron asked.
"We haven't gotten any letters," Harry answered.
"How is that possible?" Arthur asked.
"Like I said, we have a theory," Travis explained. "Remember Dobby?"
"That crazy house elf who tried to keep get us all in trouble in Ventnor?" Harry asked. "You think he was stealing our post?"
"It makes sense," James shrugged.
"Whoa whoa whoa," Arthur waved his hand. "What is all this about a house elf?"
James and Harry explained what happened over their vacation at the Isle of Wight.
"So he was trying to keep you from going to Hogwarts?" Arthur asked, confused. "That doesn't make sense. There isn't anything at all dangerous in the school!"
James and Harry shared a look, thinking back on the occurrences of last year, but stayed silent.
"Sounds like a prank to me," Fred and George chorused. "You're drifting too far east, Dad."
"But who would do such a thing?" Arthur asked as he rolled the steering wheel. "Surely there isn't anybody who would go that far to knock antlers with the Potters..."
"Malfoy," Harry muttered.
"Oh," Arthur said plainly, looking dark.
"Know of them, huh?" Brian asked.
"Quite," Arthur hissed. "Old blood, them. Part of the Most Ancient and Noble, the Sacred Twenty-Eight, the last, 'True Pureblood' families in the UK. Buncha nitwits obsessed with keeping muggles and muggleborns out of magic entirely."
"Sounds prejudiced," Travis muttered.
"Oh, it is," Arthur agreed. "I'm ashamed we Weasley's are counted among them. There isn't a thing those purebloods can do a muggleborn wizard can't. And the Malfoys are at the top of the list of folk who refuse to admit that. In fact, their patriarch is a man who supported You-Know-Who back in the day. Bah! Totterpot really thinks we believe he was under some bewitching spell... Shame we never found any evidence."
"Yeah, well, his son makes our cousin Dudley look like a sweet, charming angel," Brian quipped. "I don't think I've ever met a more obnoxious, mean spirited dick than Draco."
"We don't know if the Malfoy's even employ house elves, though," James pointed out. "It's possible, but..."
"If anybody were to have one, it'd be them," George asserted. "Most of the big, rich, older families have 'em."
"I'm glad we came to get you, anyway," said Ron. "I was getting really worried when you didn't answer any of my letters. I thought it was Errol's fault at first-"
"Who's Errol?" Brian asked.
"Our owl," Fred replied.
"He's ancient. It wouldn't be the first time he'd collapsed on a delivery. So then I tried to borrow Hermes-"
"Who?" Harry asked again.
"Ha ha," James giggled. "Hoo hoo? Hoo hoo? Ha ha, sorry, The Who reference."
"The who?" Ron asked.
"The Who," Brian affirmed. "It's an old muggle band."
"And who are they?" George asked.
"The Who," James answered.
"The band, who are they?" Fred pressed.
"The Who," James and Brian chorused. "It's their name."
"Anyways," Harry shook his head. "Who is Hermes?"
"The owl Mum and Dad bought Percy when he was made prefect," said Fred from the front. "But Percy wouldn't lend him to me," said Ron. "Said he needed him."
"Percy's been acting very oddly this summer," said George, frowning. "And he has been sending a lot of letters and spending a load of time shut up in his room… I mean, there's only so many times you can polish a prefect badge… "
The flight was a bit long, as the car cruised at highway speed over London, and into Surrey, and the subject was dropped. They all joked and pointed out landmarks, gawked at people on the ground, and enjoyed the scenery of Hampshire, Wiltshire, and Somerset counties. Arthur regaled them with the tales of his raids from his work, which James Dean found fascinating.
"So the guy actually managed to find a way to make the soccer ball defy gravity?" he asked.
"Oh, yes," Arthur tutted. "Gave the muggle neighborhood children a fright when they tried to play with it. Lifted one poor lad clear off the ground and was almost halfway to orbit before we caught him and obliviated him."
Oh, an imagination can run wild with magic's possibilities...
Within an hour, they crossed county borders into Devon, and Arthur began his descent. The Weasley's home was a small hike away from a village called Ottery St. Catchpole, and apparently was close by to a few other notable Wizarding families.
"That house over there is the Diggory's," Arthur pointed out to a house that looked almost normal, except for the extremely thick chimney coming from the roof before turning to point at another that looked like a tall, lone castle tower. "And over there is the Lovegood's, nice folk, if a bit... odd."
"Touchdown!" Fred exclaimed. They came to land on a gravel and dirt path leading up to the most obscenely amazing house James ever laid eyes on. A small front yard sat before the most obnoxious home he'd ever seen. It looked like it had originally been a chicken coop or pigpen that had been converted into a shed, then a house. Multiple stories were added onto it, heaped precariously atop one another and leaned dangerously to the left and right from center, being probably held aloft by magic. A total of five chimneys poked out from the roof, and a little wooden sign at the end of the short driveway sat crooked and in faded red paint read THE BURROW. Arthur parked the Anglia in front of a small garage, which was packed with all sorts of fun looking junk, and turned the ignition off.
"Leave it all in the car for now," he instructed them. "If we're quiet, we can get inside without your mother finding out we were even gone..."
James quirked an eyebrow and looked to Harry, who shrugged in confusion.
He led them all inside, and the four Potter boys took in the whacky, yet somehow cozy atmosphere. The kitchen was cramped and full of clutter. A small doorway led to the main floor sitting room, where a pair of enchanted floating knitting needles spun yarn into... something. A large clock rested against the far wall behind it, with nine needles, each capped with a different name for all the Weasleys and indicated where they were.
Another clock on the wall opposite it had only one hand and no numbers at all. Written around the edge were things like 'Time to make tea,' 'Time to feed the chickens,' and 'You're late.' Books were stacked three deep on the mantelpiece, with titles like Charm Your Own Cheese, Enchantment in Baking, and One Minute Feasts-It's Magic! An old radio next to the sink had just announced that coming up was "Witching Hour, with the popular singing sorceress, Celestina Warbeck."
"Ugh," Brian muttered. "Harpy music."
"It's not much," Ron muttered, turning pink. He was obviously referring to their own home, which was spacious and neat and almost spartan compared to the massive amount of clutter and chaos in the Burrow.
"It's brilliant," Harry smiled.
"Its freaking whacky, man," James agreed with a lopsided grin, walking into the living room and poking the location clock.
"And where have you been?" a low, dangerous voice hissed.
A short, plump woman with a round, kind face came marching down the ramshackle, stilted stairs with a mean sort of authority. The three Weasley brothers snapped to a sort of attention, and Arthur wilted a bit. She was dressed in an obnoxious floral print dress with a frilly trimmed, stained white apron with a wand poking out from a pocket, and she stopped before them with her hands balled into her wide hips.
"Morning, mum" Fred smiled half-heartedly.
"Three empty beds- no husband who was supposed to come straight home from work- car gone- no note!" She shrieked.
"Now, Molly- Dear-"
"Have you any idea how worried I've been!" she thundered, and James stepped back into Travis, who had been retreating, too. "You could've been killed, or worse, seen!"
"She got her list of priorities from Hermione, did she?" James whispered to Brian, who was too shaken to reply, which seemed to be the universal reaction. The four Weasley's, all of them at least a head taller than her, shriveled at her rage. Ron, especially, seemed ready to fall apart.
"And you!" She pointed her finger under Arthur's nose. "You took them? In that possible death machine?! What would have happened if you'd been seen? You could have lost your job, been sent to Azkaban!"
"Well- I mean- it worked..."
"We never had this trouble with Bill, Charlie, or Percy! Why are you so hellbent on dragging our youngest sons into such-such- such... dribble!?"
"Perfect Percy," Fred scowled.
"YOU COULD CERTAINLY LEARN WELL FROM HIS EXAMPLE!" she thundered, and James swore even the walls swayed a bit in fear.
"We were picking up the Potters," Arthur almost whimpered.
"Oh," she turned and smiled graciously at the four before pulling them into warm, soft hugs. "It's so good to see you again!"
"Well, that was a complete one-eighty," James muttered as she released him.
"At least she's not yelling at us," Travis laughed, a little nervously.
"Well, how about a spot of lunch, hm?"
…
She wasn't as scary as she first seemed. In fact, Molly Weasley was actually quite doting. She made them a late breakfast/early lunch of bacon sandwiches that could have fed an army, with a ton different juices to wash it down with. She had taken one look at James's thin frame and made him eat thirds and attempted to make him eat fourths before he made her let him quit.
"Got to fatten you up!" she declared.
After lunch, Arthur led him, Brian, and the twins out to his garage. It was packed with old, broken TVs, disemboweled radios, ancient telephones, bicycles, sleds, rubber ducks, toys, an old longbow, and so, so much more. There was a lone, narrow passageway to his workbench, that was cluttered with old hand tools and spare parts. Brian lofted the guitar amplifier onto a clear space while James unfurled the sheets of paper they had scribbled and drew their blueprints on.
"So, tell me what you need help with," Arthur started as he took a sip of coffee.
"Well, we're trying to make the amplifier work in magical settings," James answered, plugging the amp in to the lone electrical socket. He then dragged his guitar case out of the Anglia and plugged it into the amp and struck a chord.
Fred, George, and Arthur's eyes lit up at the clean, electronic sound, and James jammed out a few chords for their enjoyment. "Wonderful," Arthur breathed, barely able to keep the wonder filled smile from his face. "So it- this ampilflyer-"
"Amplifier," Brian corrected.
"Yes, yes, amplifier," Arthur nodded enthusiastically. "Can amplify and distort the sound a music instrument makes?"
"That's the short answer, pretty much," James answered as Brian changed the amp's channel and James's guitar went from a clean, clear sound to a more soulful, bluesy tone. "We wanna be able to take it to school, but..."
"Muggle electronics won't work even if the school had power," Arthur finished.
"Yeah," Brian nodded and pointed to their notes. "We noticed that the WWN uses magical, wireless radios that work by using latent magical energy alone, but the power levels necessary to make the amps work are too high for that to work well."
"We considered maybe using a sort of magical battery that can collect and amplify magical energy," James Dean continued. "But... that's still only a theory, according to our research."
"And we all know that biharmonic magical-electrical synergy is still just a theory, too, and almost a pipe dream," Brian finished.
"We were hoping that you might have some input," James implored as he rolled the guitar from around his shoulders and propped it up against an old refrigerator. "Maybe have an idea on how to make it work?"
Arthur pursed his lips and rested his hand on his chin in thought. He looked from the amp to their notes, and back to the amp. He pointed at it, and asked, "Is it okay to take it apart? It was a birthday present, right?"
"Oh, yeah," Brian pried the back casing off. "We found this one in a dumpster so we don't mess up the good ones."
"Resourceful," Arthur commended as he began poking around the inside of the amp. "I gotta say, this is a lot more complex than I expected, but... yes. Well, I must say, it'll be easy to do, but only..."
"Only what?" Fred asked.
"Well, I'm not ready to try here," Arthur said sheepishly. "I'd rather try it out on something else first, with less power, but I think it should be doable. We can take some old wireless parts, specifically the latent energizer, and try applying it to a battery hooked to some kind of alternator."
"Like a car alternator?" James asked.
"Sort of," Arthur held up a finger. "But it would alternate latent, residual magical energy into electrical, and back again. It would work like this."
Arthur pulled a notebook down from a shelf and used a carpenters pencil to start sketching. "See, this swirly stuff would be magical energy, and the energizer would pick it up. It would go into the battery via way of the alternator, which would convert it into electricity. Then, whenever the energy was needed, it would send it to the output via the alternator again, to be converted back into magical energy to power the system."
"Like a piggyback," James muttered in awe. "Make the magical energy electric, store it, then convert back as needed!"
"That is brilliant!" George laughed. "It would bypass the need to design a synergizer or a magical battery entirely!"
"Yes, but I still doubt it would be able to power something that needed as much power as a guitar amplifier," Arthur shrugged as he laid the pencil down on his diagram. "But it could work for something simpler, like, say, a short range, two-way wireless."
"So, like, magical walkie-talkies?" James asked.
"Uh... yeah, exactly!" Arthur smiled and lifted up an old rotary dial telephone. "Wanna get to work?"
…
They had worked well into the early evening. They had made decent progress, cannibalizing a broken wizarding wireless's energizer and connecting it to an alternator and car battery scrapped from a wrecked Triumph Spitfire. With some modifications, they got the alternator to convert magical energy to electrical and store in the battery, but only just barely.
Molly called them in for dinner, which consisted of braised chicken and vegetable soup. Just as James was about to take a seat, a red haired rocket flew into the dining room, bowling him over. It landed with an "oof!" on his chest, and he had to hold the small person up off of him.
"Ginny!" Molly called out. "What have I told you about running in the house!"
Ginny, however, wasn't listening. She stared at James, bright brown eyes wide and face frozen in mortification. She clamored back, unintentionally kneeing James in the groin, making him lash out and throwing her to the floor.
"Here, lemme help you," Harry tried to reach to her, but she merely "eep!"ed and flung herself backwards, knocking a platter of bread rolls from her father's grasp.
"Ginny!" he yelped.
"My 'nads!" James cried.
"Ginevra Weasley, what has gotten into you!" Molly roared.
Whatever had gotten into Ginevra Weasley, it had made her squeal and run from the kitchen. She scrabbled on all fours out of the kitchen and flew up the stairs like a fiery haired wild animal, squeaking something that probably was supposed to be "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" but came as "IsureeIsureeIsuree!"
"What the hell was that?" Travis asked as he and Molly helped James up.
"And why did it own me in the junk?" James rasped.
"That was Ginny," Ron explained sympathetically. "She is obsessed with you two, you've been all she's talked about all summer."
"Could she have kept the excitement about us away from my groin?" James asked as he found his seat.
Brian snorted. "Phrasing."
"Well, eat up," Molly bade him. "We have a long day tomorrow- got to de-gnome the garden, they're getting bad again."
Groans filled the dining room. The four looked around in confusion, all the Weasley's looked dejected.
"Did I miss something?" Brian asked.
"We have gnomes in the garden," Percy explained, looking pale. "They're mostly harmless, but their burrows are underground and they eat at the roots of everything."
"Gnomes..." James muttered as he ate with a grimace. "Just great."
"What?" Harry asked.
"They're like magical moles," he explained to his twin. "They're practically sentient pests. Worse than that house elf, too, since they fight back..."
…
The next morning dawned, and Ginny had come down to breakfast. She had seen Harry and almost fainted as she bolted back to her room. The rest of them ate boisterously and were in good spirits. James and Brian had spent the night on the Twins' floor while Travis and Harry slept in Ron's room, and Mrs. Weasley provided them with enough pillows and blankets that it almost felt like they slept on real beds.
After eating their breakfast of eggs and sausage, Mrs. Weasley tried to instruct them on how to de-gnome the garden with a book by Gilderoy Lockhart, which was met with groans and protest. James recognized the name as an author of a book he'd read from his mother's collection. When his father had found out, he'd almost flipped his lid and told James Dean to never, ever read that "sinister, simpering drivel" ever again.
James found his father's statement so hilarious, he had stopped referring to the author by his name and only now by the shortened moniker of "Simp."
"Mum fancies him," he explained. "But his techniques never really work, they mostly just come running back after a day or two."
"Well, if you know so much, do it your way, then!"
"Planned on it," Fred and George chorused, to James and Travis's laughter.
The twin's led them out into the back garden, and James fell in love all over again. It was a chaotic mess, with overgrown weeds and gnarled trees pressing into the back of the house. Plants and flowers of all sorts raised from the flower beds, and James made a mental note to harvest some potions ingredients. The grass was in terrible need of being cut, being well up to mid-calf in height, and a big, green pond filled out the last half of the large space, croaking with frogs and toads and ducks.
"Muggles have gnomes, too," Harry told Ron as James followed Percy to a flower bed.
"Don't they look like little people dressed like Father Christmas?" Ron balked as he bent over into the weeds.
"Well, yeah," Harry affirmed.
"Watch," Percy told James as he knelt and grabbed the first gnome. It was a disgusting looking creature, dirt covering its naked, portly body. Razor sharp teeth lined its mouth, and it had bony feet that looked painful to be kicked with. All in all, they looked like bald, big nosed potatoes with limbs, and Percy grabbed the thing by its feet.
"Geroff! Geroff me!" it squeaked.
"Now you gotta confuse them," Percy instructed, holding it above his head and flinging it around like a rock in a sling. James couldn't hold back his laughter as the creature screamed in its squeaky, terrified voice before Percy slung it over the fence and clear into the woods.
"Nice one, Perce!" George laughed as he wheeled the gnome in his own hands high above him. "Bet I can go farther!"
He slung it, and its cries filled the air as it arced well above the tree tops. A loud, squeaky "oof!" could be heard in the distance, and it seemed the thing landed in a tree. James, not one to be outdone, leapt onto one trying to escape from Percy, and quickly started slinging it over his head before gripping it like a football and launched it like he was Dan Marino. The gnome got sick and loosed its breakfast behind it like a sick green tail, and it landed feet first into a tall oak tree.
"Whoo!" James roared in triumph.
"Nice arm!" Ron laughed.
Harry had tried to be nice to the first one he caught and plopped it on the other side of the Weasley's fence, but it had sensed weakness. It buried its dagger-like teeth into his finger and wouldn't let go. It was rewarded with Harry launching it easily fifty yards in anger.
"They aren't too bright, are they?" Travis giggled as Brian threw one up into the air for him to punt like a football, launching it high in the air.
"Nice hang time!" Fred clapped. "And no, they pretty much are stupid. You catch one, the rest come out of their holes to see what the ruckus was all about."
James roared victoriously as Percy soft-balled one to him and he launched it like a baseball with a make shift bat he made from a dried up old fence post. "Woo! Jimmuh Dean with duh Gran' Slam, behbiieee! Yankee Stadium is on its feet! Knocking it outta duh pa'k straight tuh 164th with the bat outta hell!"
"Doesn't this, y'know, hurt them?" Harry asked, looking disturbed by his twins behavior.
"Not really," Ron shrugged. "They're tough as nails."
"Hell," George grunted as he tossed another gnome. "We use 'em as Quaffles and Bludgers on occasion if we can't find ours."
Soon, an army of defeated gnomes, rattled, beaten, and worn, trudged out into the open field, many of them muttering curse at James and Travis for their cruel behavior. James waved his makeshift baseball bat at them giddily as he jumped onto the fence-post, swinging his bat at them threateningly.
"Come on back when y'er ready to go anuthuh nine innings against the Behb, behbiiiieee! The New Yahk Knockuh will be waitin fer ya's!"
"He really lets loose on the New York accent when he's excited, doesn't he?" Ron asked Harry.
Harry shrugged. "I've never seen him like this before in my life."