Chapter 2: Contemplations
Chapter Summary: Cormac contemplates the future and reflects their families.
Friday Evening ~ 6 years after Derek's death
Cormac's Reflections
The boys and I arrive at Meredith's with dinner for everyone.
Zola is sitting with her butterfly wings and a kids book about brains so he asks Zola where her mom is, she replies, "She won't leave her room."
I signal to Liam to start prepping dinner, and head into the living room and saying to Zola, "Are you missing your daddy?"
"Yes. I think mommy is too."
"It's ok to miss those we love and have lost. Some days are harder than others," I reply sitting down beside Zola.
"I know. And he's watching over us," Zola replies with a smile turning and placing her arms around me for a hug.
"You are right. Do you want to help Liam with dinner while I go talk to your mom?"
"Yes please," Zola says, bouncing off to the kitchen. Once again I am amazed at how quickly kids can bounce back. I'm always amazed but I shouldn't be given my job working with kids every day.
Before heading upstairs, I talk to Liam asking if he would feed all the kids and not to wait for us to come back down. Liam and Zola chat about losing a parent while they make dinner. My heart swells with love as I head upstairs to cuddle and hold my girlfriend, knowing she needs the support today.
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Cormac is thinking about their families and moving forward. Their five kids get along. Her sisters accept him. They had dinner with his parents earlier this evening and his mom loves her.
This past year has held so many firsts, but so much promise. Anniversaries are hard after the loss of a loved one, but they are getting easier for both of them. This past week was another first, the first time Meredith was in a loving relationship with a promise of a future on the anniversary of her husband's death. Meredith had held him on the 3rd anniversary of Abby's passing when he'd broken down at work and now it was his turn to comfort his partner.
He thought back to Friday night after cuddling with her and calming her down; they sat quietly reflecting. While cuddling, he could hear Liam and Zola working in the kitchen, Austin, Bailey and Scout playing in the backyard, and guessed that Ellis was drawing somewhere. He heard them eat dinner, and the dishwasher loaded. They heard everyone settle into a movie once Scout had headed to bed with Link. And how their oldest children, Liam and Zola, had quietly tapped on the door leaving them with a tray of tea and strawberry ice cream.
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"Hey Jackson!" Cormac calls, jogging to catch up Jackson Avery.
"Cormac, do you need a consult?" he asks.
"No, I need to talk. So was wondering if you had time for a beer or whiskey this week?" Cormac asks, dropping his voice down so those passing couldn't hear.
"If you don't mind it at my place, I have Harriet this week. How about tonight at 8?"
"Your place is fine. Dad just brought me some whiskey from home. I'll bring that."
"Oh, Irish Whiskey straight from Ireland…," Jackson teases.
Later that evening, Cormac grabs one of the new whiskey bottles and leaves his boys chatting with their grandparents and heads over to Jackson's penthouse. He doesn't even need to feel guilty about leaving his boys as they were having a great time with his parents. Normally he tries to fit in any socializing while Liam and Austin are with friends or playing football.
He is greeted by Harriet and Jackson as they open the door and invite him in. "Sorry, someone wanted to run around naked after her bath and wouldn't get into her nightie. I just need to put her to bed. I have glasses and some nachos ready in the kitchen," Jackson says.
"No worries. I totally understand. My lads are thankfully past that point!" Cormac replies heading to the kitchen area.
Jackson returns about 10 minutes later apologizing about the delay. "Hey, I understand the single dad thing. And our kids come first," Cormac says.
"Thanks. Sometimes it's hard. Where are your boys?"
"My parents are in town, so they are hanging out together."
"That must be nice. So what have we here?" Jackson asks, looking at the bottle of aged irish whiskey.
"We can't get this over here. So dad always brings me something that isn't exported."
"Wonderful. So I'm guessing this isn't just to share whiskey… What's up?" Jackson asks, seeing Cormac staring at his glass of amber liquid.
"Well… you know Mer, and…," Cormac starts and then pulls out the small jewelry box and hands it to Jackson. "What do you think she'll say to this?"
Opening the ring box, Jackson sees a beautiful engagement ring with a sparkling cultured emerald in an open basket setting against a contrasting 14k white gold set with Celtic love knots on each side of the emerald. The band is embellished from each of the Celtic Love knots with shared prong diamond accents, allowing for maximum light reflection and shimmer.
"Wow! This is beautiful," Jackson says.
"So Mer… I want to spend the rest of my life with her. But..."
"She's a little skittish?" Jackson asks.
"Aye."
"You know that's not new. She's always been like that. Her mom and dad really hurt her. Has she told you much about Ellis Grey?"
"No… not much. Ellis' Alzheimer's and her death during her intern year. She's told me about being abandoned by Thatcher, about finding Susan and Molly her intern year, about Lexie," he admits.
"Ellis was an absent single parent who constantly told Meredith that she wouldn't make it. Meredith was raised by nannies, and often left in the halls of the hospital to wander and fend for herself. I met Ellis at my grandfather's functions. She was hard, tough, and worked long hours. And then left everything for Meredith to deal with in her last year of Med School and during her internship while requiring Meredith not tell anyone that she had Alzheimer's."
"Wow. I guessed there was some trauma there, but didn't realize…"
"She was raised with abandonment, emotional abuse and neglect. Did you hear my speech for her when she won the Catherine Fox award?" Jackson says, seeing the negative head shake from Cormac, he slips to his office and pulls out a copy of his speech and hands over.
Knowing very well that she might win tonight, Dr. Grey opted to stay in Seattle. A trauma came in and she knew that she was the right doctor for the job. That's one of the many reasons that I am so very, very proud to call her my colleague and my friend. Now, Dr. Grey has experienced more loss in her life than, I think, most of us would deem fair. She lost her little sister, Lexie Grey, who I know would love to be here tonight with us. She lost her husband, Dr. Derek Shepherd, who knew with total certainty that this night would happen. And she also lost her mother, Dr. Ellis Grey, who won this Award twice, once as a resident, and probably would've won a few more if she hadn't been taken from all of us so young. The most amazing thing about Meredith, though, is that she takes all that pain, all that loss, and she turns into drive. Drive to save lives, to make things better. And despite all that she's lost, she continues to find joy in her work as a surgeon, as a teacher, as a mother. And she managed to share that joy through her spirit of discovery and of possibility and of hope, right in the face of darkness. I am profoundly grateful for the lessons that I have learned from Meredith Grey. And it is my distinct honor to accept this Award on her behalf. Congrats, Meredith!
They sat sipping their whiskey, both thinking of how strong and amazing Meredith is.
"She might panic with the question, but she's found joy with you. And you have found joy with her," Jackson says, topping up their whiskey and grabbing some nachos.
Jackson's speech from Season 14 Episode 7, "Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story"
A/N: Your comments and feedback are greatly appreciated. I am working on further chapters for this work.