Hello y'all!

Second OS of this compilation, one of my favorite so far. Edward thinks he's clever, but his plan backfires him.

Characters: Edward Elric, Alphonse Elric, Roy Mustang, Team Mustang

Rating: K+ (typical Ed swearing)

Genre: humour

Theme: "judicieux" = wise, smart

Enjoy!

Clever idea?

For once, Edward Elric was early to hand in his report to Colonel – bastard – Mustang. Alphonse behind him, he was striding in the hallways of East City HQ to reach his SO's office. A mischievous smile spread in his face as he approached it, and the prospect of seeing Mustang embarrassed galvanized him.

He knew his idea was smart, and whatever Alphonse opposed, all would go fine. His mission had gone without a hitch, so he could allow himself a bit of fantasy. He couldn't wait to see the Colonel's reaction.

"Brother, I still don't think it's wise." His younger brother tried to convince him.

"It is, I can assure you. You'll see, that damned Colonel will be fooled." Ed grin widened. As they arrived in front of the door he feared a bit when he'd begun his missions as a State alchemist he knocked without a bit of hesitation.

"Come in!" A feminine voice answered. The brothers entered to find an industrious atmosphere in the office where Mustang's subordinates were working. They raised their heads at the sound of the door. Fuery greeted them with a smile.

"Hello Edward. Are you here to hand in your report?" Hawkeye asked.

"Hello Lieutenant," Ed replied. "I'm done with my mission, and yeah, that's my report." He showed the brown envelope in his hand.

"That's not usual for you to be so fast, boss," Havoc said nonchalantly, chewing his pen. "You look a lot like the chief on that point."

Ed lifted an eyebrow, annoyed by the Second-Lieutenant's attitude.

"That's right, both of you tend to do things at the last minute," Falman added.

"Don't compare me to him!" shouted the young alchemist.

"Ed, they're only joking," Alphonse said, but he sounded a bit uncertain.

"I'm serious," Falman assured firmly.

Before Edward could reply, Hawkeye told them she would inform her superior. Her intervention appeased the electric atmosphere of the room, to Alphonse relief. A few moments later, they were introduced into Mustang's office.

"Ah, Fullmetal! Already done? How many buildings did you knock down this time?" he exclaimed as they entered.

"That's bold of you to assume I've destroyed State facilities during my mission." Edward replied drily.

"I'm used to receiving complaints from neighbors whose houses have been damaged by a red dwarf…"

"WHO'S SO INSIGNIFICANT HE CAN'T BE SEEN WITH NAKED EYE?" Edward couldn't refrain his rage as Mustang mentioned his height.

The Colonel kept a straight face, a smile on the corner of his lips, waiting for the storm to end.

"Give me your report, so we can get over it. The earliest paperwork is done, the earliest I can leave for my date."

"Tss… You definitely won't change." Edward handed the envelope. Mustang took it and opened it. He read a few lines on the sheet, frowning, while Edward was waiting, a mocking grin ready to bloom on his face.

"Fullmetal…"

"Yes, Colonel?" Edward raised his eyes, certain he would see frustration on Mustang's face. However, he met a mischievous smile and a mocking look.

"You are aware that Morse code is taught at the Academy, aren't you?"

Edward's will to make fun of Mustang faded away. He gulped, his throat dry, and didn't dare to answer.

"I don't think that writing that many insults and names about me in Morse code is a clever idea." Mustang declared in a serious tone. "You've proved you're immature with that paper."

A loud sigh came from the giant armor. "I told you Ed. The Colonel is smarter than you thought."

"Shit!" The oldest of the Elrics shouted. "I thought I could fool you."

Mustang put one glove on and snapped his fingers, burning to ashes the incriminated paper. Then, he extended his still-gloved hand with a threatening glare. "Now, give me your real report before I send a word to the wages department so they could deduct part of yours."

Edward gnashed his teeth and reluctantly took out of his pocket a folded paper that seemed a bit worn out. "Okay, I admit, it's only a draft!"

"Finally! Come back when you'll have a real report!"

Once both disillusioned brothers had left his office, Mustang took the paper Fullmetal had given him. As if he would burn such a treasure! He grinned widely while reading again the dots and dashes covering the sheet. Well, Hawkeye would surely yell at him for burning a page from the report he had to write. But if that meant she would stay longer with him that evening, he wouldn't complain.