2. #Density

The sun shone down on Cat. She squeezed her eyes shut against the brightness, then wondered where the little bright spots came from and how she could see them since her eyes were closed. She thought about stuff like that sometimes. She never found answers, but she liked the thinking part.

She loved living in LA, and she especially loved going to Hollywood Arts High School, but sometimes it was so bright she got worried she wouldn't be able to see where she was going and trip over someone. She had done dumber things than that before. Like the time she'd moved into the school because she didn't want to stay with her weird uncle and she didn't understand that Nona lived in Venice, California instead of Venice, Italy. That had been kind of embarrassing, especially when Jade and Robbie had found out.

But then Jade had called Cat's parents and figured things out for her and even helped her move in with Nona. It was a nice thing for Jade to do, which confused Cat because Jade wasn't that nice. Although more often than not she seemed to show a sisterly interest in Cat. And she knew it was sisterly because it reminded Cat of Tori and Trina. They sometimes did awful things to each other, but they still helped each other when it mattered. Cat didn't have any sisters of her own, just a very disturbed brother who really scared her and, honestly, was a big part of the reason Cat struggled so much every day. When your entire childhood is spent living in fear instead of learning things that other kids learned, it kind of messes you up. Cat didn't blame her brother—a lady should never place blame, it's unseemly—but she understood that because she was so afraid all the time, she may have turned out a little…different.

No matter what, she was grateful to Jade for helping her because moving in with Nona is what would lead her to meet Sam, and meeting Sam was the best thing that ever happened to her. So maybe Cat being confused about where her Nona lived wasn't dumb after all. Maybe it was…oh, what was that word? They said it in that time travel she and Sam watched last night.

Density! The nerdy guy said the pretty girl was his density!

So yeah, maybe that was it. It was all density.

"Um, Cat? Are you going to sit down?"

Cat blinked and saw she was standing right behind Tori, her lunch tray hovering just above Tori's head. The sun had vanished behind one of the very few clouds in the sky, giving Cat her vision back, for a minute at least.

"Oh. Yeah. Hi!"

Cat took the empty seat next to her friend. She felt her cheeks burning just a bit, but her skin was tan enough that no one would have seen it.

"You okay?" Tori asked. "You seem distracted."

"I was just thinking about density."

"Density?" Tori's eyebrow raised up in a perfect arc. Cat wondered how she got it to do that.

"Yeah. You know, density," Jade said. "Like the thickness of the skull between Cat's ears and her brain."

Jade's comment hurt a little, but Cat laughed it off as she always did. She pretended that it hadn't been said or that it was a joke. One of those sister-jokes like what Tori and Trina made. "No, not like that," she said. "Like when something is meant to be no matter what."

"I think you mean destiny," Tori said, smiling fondly at Cat. Cat loved Tori's smile. Her cheekbones were so perfect and her smiles were always so full of genuine affection. They used to give Cat butterflies in her stomach back when Tori first came to the school. She had a bit of a crush on Tori at first, but in the years since they had become good friends. Cat was thankful for that.

"No, that's not what they said in that movie Sam and I watched last night. You know, where the kid went back in time and met his dad as a teenager and his mom tried to get all up in his business?"

Tori's enormous eyes lit up with understanding. "Back to the Future? That line was a joke, Cat. He should have said destiny but he didn't. It was supposed to be funny."

"Since when is someone being dumb supposed to be funny?"

"Since forever," Jade said. "That's why we keep..."

Cat noticed Tori shooting Jade a stern glance. Jade's smile fell and she rolled her eyes.

"That's why we keep Sinjin around," Jade muttered.

"You were going to say me, weren't you?"

Jade looked away. Cat felt even worse for a moment. She knew she wasn't as smart as her friends, but most of the time they didn't make fun of her for it.

"Oh, hey Cat," Tori said. "I meant to ask you if you wanted to do a song at the prom? The band canceled so we're trying to get some of the students to pitch in. That way we can spend more of the money on food and decorations."

Cat lit up. She loved the chance to sing. She had a hard time saying the things that were on her mind, so any chance to sing and express herself in ways other people could understand was so much fun for her. "Of course, of course, yes! What kind of song? Fast, slow, hip-hop, church music?"

"Whatever you're feeling," Tori said. "Except maybe that last one. I just need your choice by tomorrow so I can let the guys know." Tori glanced at her phone. "I gotta go. Andre and I are working on a project for Sikowitz. See you guys."

Tori gathered her things and rushed off, leaving an awkward silence between Cat and Jade.

"So…you got a date for the prom?" Jade asked.

Cat could tell from her tone that she was trying to move past her mean comments earlier. It was the closest thing Jade ever got to offering an apology. But the prom was a tricky subject for Cat, one she had been thinking about for a few weeks now.

"No, not yet," Cat said.

"I figured Robbie would have asked you by now."

"He hasn't. I don't think I'd say yes anyway."

Jade raised one of her angry-looking eyebrows. "Really? I thought you liked him."

"I do. I did. I don't know." Robbie was a sweet boy, but Cat never really understood how she felt about him. He was so nice to her, and he wrote her that song, and he was so funny when he was talking as Rex. Cat adored him. But she didn't quite like him like that. "I like Robbie a lot, but I think of him kind of how I think of you or Tori."

Jade smirked. "As just one of the girls? Yeah, that's how I think of him, too."

They shared a laugh.

"Honestly there's someone I want to go with but I'm too afraid to say anything."

Jade leaned forward, suddenly very attentive. "Really? Who is it? Spill."

"Spill what? I don't have a drink."

"It means tell me. Who is he?"

Cat felt her cheeks getting red. Really red. She could tell by Jade's reaction that she noticed it too. "No."

"Come on. Who is it? You think I'll tell everyone?"

"Kind of, yeah."

"Okay, you might be right. What if I promise I won't? Then will you tell me who he is?" Cat averted her eyes and shifted her hair so it covered her red cheeks. Apparently, Jade saw something in the movement. "Holy crap. It's not a he, is it?" Jade's eyes got really wide in a way that made Cat very nervous. She was terrible at keeping secrets. "It's Sam, isn't it?"

"Sssshhhhhhh!" Cat said, putting her hand over Jade's mouth. Jade's breath was hot against her palm. And oh god, what was that wet thing? Cat pulled her hand away. "You licked me!"

"You touched me," Jade said. "I'm right, aren't I? You're into your roomie. I knew it."

"How did you know?"

"Oh please. Remember when I first met her and you got crazy jealous?"

Cat shifted uncomfortably. "I was just a teeny bit jealous."

"You got her ex-boyfriend up here and tried to flirt with him. And then you tried to jump a tub full of killer tuna fish so that Sam wouldn't get hurt. That's not normal. Not over a friendship."

Cat was exasperated. She wanted to take it all back so Jade didn't know, but she couldn't. She couldn't lie or hide it or fake it. "All right, all right, okay!" she shouted. "Just ssshhhh! Please don't tell anyone."

Jade sighed. "I won't."

"Pinky swear?"

"I'm not touching your finger."

"Kay, kay."

"Just tell me one thing."

"Okay. Um…the process by which plants make food is called photo…photo…photosyntheticness."

Jade stared blankly at Cat. Cat awkwardly glanced at the table as she realized she got it wrong again. "I may have misunderstood what you were looking for."

"First of all, it's pronounced photosynthesis. And second, I meant that I would tell you what I want you to tell me."

Cat breathed a sigh of relief. "That makes more sense."

"Why do you care so much about Sam? I mean…don't get me wrong. I like her a lot. But we've got a lot in common. You two…I get the whole odd couple vibe with you being friends, I guess. I mean, it's always worked for you and me, too. But why do you want more than that with Sam?"

For once, Cat didn't have to think about her answer. She knew. She had known in her heart for years, from the moment Sam rescued her from that garbage truck. She smiled, her cheeks turning red again for very different reasons. "Because I love being with her. She makes me safe. She makes me better. She makes me happy."