This is another Ally chapter, but the future chapters will rotate more between character viewpoints. Let me know if you like it!
Ally: "Heartbeat on the High Line"
I woke up the next morning in the same position, and Austin was still sound asleep next to me. I checked my phone and saw that it was already 9 am, so I scrambled to my feet, careful not to wake Austin. I found Trish rummaging through the cabinets in the kitchen.
"Hey, I gotta go, my mom expects me home any minute," I whispered to her.
Trish nodded and I turned to go but she hissed, "Wait, Ally, what happened last night?"
I looked at her in confusion, "What do you mean?"
"With you and Austin, duh," she answered, rolling her eyes.
I just blushed and looked at the ground. A grin spread across Trish's face. "Ok you've given me all the info I need." I slipped out of the house, mortified.
I got home at exactly the time I promised my mom I'd be home by and we had a peaceful rest of the day. Mostly I played piano and tried to write some lyrics. The thought of the previous night crossed my mind once or twice… or a thousand times. But what I really didn't expect was a text around 8 pm from Austin, which just said, "Hey, what's up?"
Which is not to say that I thought Austin didn't have my number. It's just that at the time I expected that he'd avoid me for a couple weeks and then pretend the previous night had never happened. That was his usual strategy with others girls, or so I had heard. It had been enough for me that a cute, popular boy had found me attractive enough to make out with. No harm, no foul, right? Everyone walked out of the interaction happy.
But here he was texting me, and I didn't know what to say back. I stared at it for maybe ten minutes and finally sent back, "Not much, you?" It wasn't poetry, but it was about as neutral as I could make it.
"Just chilling. Sorry I didn't get to say goodbye to you this morning," he sent back a moment later. Now I was really freaking out. I thought maybe he was missing his keys or something and wanted to know if I had them. Turns out he just wanted to talk… and remind me of what had happened between us last night.
"Sorry, Mom's pretty strict about punctuality and I promised her I'd get home early."
"No problem. What are you up to tomorrow?"
How could I try to not sound lame when all I had to do was read a book and mess around on the piano? I settled on, "Maybe writing some music, what about you?"
"You want to work on something together maybe? I'm free all day."
He made it sound so casual, but I had no idea what that meant. Was it a date? Did he expect a continuation of last night? But the more I thought about it the more I knew that whatever he was proposing sounded like a good plan. I'd be okay with a date with Austin, and honestly, I'd also be okay if he just wanted to make out some more. Or if he just actually wanted to hang out and write music.
We agreed on a time and place and then the conversation trailed off. For the rest of the night I mostly stared at my ceiling but managed to get a few hours of sleep.
The next day I was at the park halfway between our houses at one o'clock on the dot. Punctuality when taken to my extremes may in fact be a flaw, rather than a virtue. I sat on the grass, nervously fidgeting with the hem of the cardigan I had tied around my waist and checking my phone. Thankfully, Austin didn't keep me waiting more than five minutes. He had his guitar slung over his shoulder and his hands in his pockets as he strolled over to me and flashed me the biggest smile I'd ever seen.
He sat down across from me, neither invading my personal space nor sitting noticeably far away. The first thing he said was, "You look great, Ally."
"Oh, um, I don't… thanks," I said, the maximum amount of my awkwardness showing up.
He looked at me quizzically, then asked, "Are you just bad at taking compliments or do you think I'm uniquely insincere?"
It was a blunt question, and one I hadn't been anticipating, but I matched blunt with blunt. "Hard to tell if I'm bad at taking compliments, I don't get a lot of practice."
"Oh come on that can't be true. You're cute and talented and nice. You should be getting compliments all the time."
"You're really adding to the problem, you know that? But no. Maybe you haven't noticed but my body language is usually screaming 'don't pay attention to me' and most people seem to take that to heart."
He just rolled his eyes and moved the conversation along, although the topic came back around. We started messing around with music and he played some guitar riffs he had been working on. Before long we were knee deep in a song about overcoming fears.
Song-writing is often an intense emotional experience, but for some reason I couldn't identify, Austin and I were laying everything out on the line in this conversation. He poked some more about my physical insecurities, which could honestly fill a book, and he mentioned his claustrophobia and the way that being in tightly-packed crowds could give him panic attacks. In return, I told him about my fears of rejection. It was a very soul-baring experience and I would have never predicted it in a million years.
And throughout it all, he kept up his flirty tone. My fears didn't scare him away, and he looked relieved that I didn't care about his. And Austin singing directly to me felt like a dreamy hallucination. Our eyes locked when we sang in harmony and there was some kind of intense connection, something I'd never felt with anyone before. I was very confused about what this cute, popular boy was doing to my insides.
Finally, I had to leave because it was getting close to dinner time. He walked me to my car but, before I could get in, he stepped very close to me and said, "Hey, this was great. I… really like you. Can I see you again tomorrow?"
His face was so close to mine and his eyes so intense and beautiful that I didn't have a choice, really. I nodded mutely and he smiled. Then, suddenly, he leaned down to kiss me again, making it seem so natural and smooth, like we had done this a hundred times. But it was still all new to me and my heart beat wildly as his lips came into contact with mine. This was no chaste peck on the lips, and a moment later he had me pressed up against the side of my car, boxing me in with his arms, and kissing the hell out of me. When he broke away a few minutes later, he just winked at me and said, "Can't make you late for dinner," before walking away.
And that was it. I was totally and utterly screwed into having a ginormous crush on this boy who made me feel like the only person in the world he wanted to be with. We spent some time together almost every day for the next three weeks. Eventually I had to cave and tell Trish what was going on, and even my mom was curious about who I was spending so much time with.
Unfortunately, Trish raised some uncomfortable questions.
"So, like, are you guys dating? Because Austin doesn't really do dating." she asked over the phone one night.
"I don't know, it seems like it. I don't see how he would have time to hang out with anyone else given how much time he spends with me. But I haven't done the define-the-relationship conversation yet or anything. I don't know, it's just so nice how it is, I don't want to mess anything up."
"Better to mess it up now before you're too attached and it breaks your heart if you're not on the same page," she said, and I could practically hear her nodding sagely.
"I think it's a little too late for that," I mumbled, knowing that I was already head over heels and I had absolutely given Austin the power to rip my heart in half, despite all my reservations and fear of rejection. Something about him wiped all those away when I was with him.
Trish just sighed and changed the topic, knowing she could never convince me to do anything I didn't want to do.
A few weeks after we had started hanging out, Austin called me one night and said, "Hey, are you free this Friday?"
"When this Friday?" I asked, opening up my phone calendar as we talked, as if I had any other plans.
"The whole day. I want to do a day trip with you."
My whole face lit up at the idea. "Yeah, I think that can be arranged," I said, suddenly shy because of how romantic this sounded.
He picked me up on Friday and drove us to the train station.
"We're going to New York?" I asked, surprised by the choice. "Don't you hate crowds, though?"
"We're going to go to all the places that aren't crowded in New York," he said, smiling at me before taking my hand and leading me onto the train.
I think the only people who find the train ride into New York City romantic are teenagers in New Jersey and Connecticut. Yes, you have to ride through industrial wasteland but you can see the approaching city, with all its experiences and excitement just waiting to happen, and the momentum of the train feels like it's working its way into the rhythm of the blood pumping through your body. And, I can tell you from experience, it's even better when the person you have an elephant-sized crush on is holding your hand.
We chatted the whole time, and as soon as we got into Penn Station we headed for the subway. Austin took me downtown first and we browsed used book stores and record stores, comparing favorites and finding the occasional bargain we were willing to splurge for. Then we took the train back up to mid-town and found a grocery store where we bought some picnic supplies and headed for Central Park. It was early afternoon at that point, but after the office crowd usually ate their lunches so we were able to lay on the grass, sprawled out and reasonably alone, as we munched on fruit and cheese and cookies.
"You seem to know New York extremely well," I commented to him, my eyes closed as I lay back and enjoyed the warmth of the sun.
"Yeah I love this city. I spent a couple years actually living here around middle school, before I moved to the suburbs for our school. Ever since then I've wanted to come back. I think I'm only going to apply to schools here next year."
"It's funny, I've lived so close my whole life but I've only come here a few times, mostly for stuff like Broadway shows with my mom or school trips. But being here with you today, I could totally see the excitement of living here. Do the crowds not bother you here?"
"A little, yeah, but fortunately in my experience you can always sneak away and find a quiet place somehow. In a place this big there are always little quiet pockets."
"I like that idea. I feel like that belongs in a song."
So, we lay there in Central Park, brainstorming lyrics and it felt like we were talking about our relationship as much as about the physical reality of escaping crowds. The idea of finding a safe place to hide from the world where you didn't have to be scared resonated with me because of Austin, not because I understood his claustrophobia, but because he was like a safe place for me where my anxieties and insecurities didn't control me.
It was still light out but headed towards evening when Austin's stomach started rumbling. "Chipotle?" he asked and I agreed.
We hopped on another subway, grabbed our food, and then he led me up a flight of stairs. I don't know what I was expecting, but it was not the High Line. We plopped down on a bench and sat, looking out over a busy street in Manhattan. Austin opened his food, but I was still preoccupied with how the elevated view changed my perspective on New York. When I snapped out of it, I saw him looking at me.
"I like the way you look at things. You have so much intensity and focus when you're really thinking about something. The look you just had is the same one you get when you're working on songs."
I blushed and looked down, mumbling, "Thanks."
"Hey, that's some improvement! You didn't even try to deny that one!" Austin said, grinning.
We ate mostly in a reflective, comfortable silence. He took my trash from me when I was done and threw it away for me. Then together we walked the full length of the High Line until we reached the end, looking out over the rail yards as the sun set. It was a reminder that we were going to have to head home soon, but I didn't want to think about that just yet.
I was leaning against the fence, looking over the city, when Austin came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me, pressing his front to my back. He felt warm and safe and comfortable to me.
"I'm crazy about you, Ally," he whispered in my ear, and I found the nerve to say, "I'm pretty crazy about you, too. Who'd have thought that after all these years of barely knowing each other and sitting in the same classes, we'd be here." I could feel him smile.
Not long after, we headed back to Penn Station, although not before he pushed me into a dark corner on the High Line and kissed me senseless. We caught the last train back. When he dropped me off at my house, all I could say was "I can't imagine a more perfect day than today." He just leaned over and kissed me, and then I practically floated inside my house.