LIFE IS BUT A DREAM
One of her favorite things to do was watch him sleep; the steady rise and fall of his chest as he took each breath. His head leaned against the window pane as his breathing stayed in sync with the purr of the jet's engine. The motion of his inhale and exhale calmed her. She didn't know why or when this became her thing but she always felt calmer when he was sleeping soundly beside her, that and the sounds of Chicago playing in her headphones. She couldn't help but feel hopeful for a future they both looked forward to. The past few years have been full of uncertainty and loss. His last mission was a tough one and the one that finally caused him to admit the SEALs was a younger man's job. They were now looking forward to a new assignment and a leap of faith to start their lives as a family.
With their hands intertwined she felt him startle awake. Confused, he looked around, assessed the situation, and smiled as he realized where he was.
"You okay Sailor?" She asked as she removed her headphones and tightened her grip on his hand
"Yeah, sorry, I guess It was a dream" He wiped the sweat from his forehead. "It felt so real."
Lifting her hand, he kissed the ring on her finger.
She smiled. She hated to admit she loved these small gestures he showered her with. It was one of the characteristics that made her fall in love with him all those years ago.
"Want to talk about it?" She could tell it was weighing heavily on his mind
He nodded "It didn't make much sense."
"You aren't worried about the move are you?" She knew he was
He nodded again but she could see the trepidation in his expression. "You are going to do great training those young SEALs"
"I know, it was just not how I saw my career ending. Not yet." The expression on his face landed somewhere between sadness and fear
"Be grateful you are still able to remain active until you are ready to fully retire. Besides we get to raise our family in Hawaii and you can't beat the free babysitting"
She hated to admit she was happy his time with the SEALs was over. Every deployment, every spin up, was a chance she would lose him. His last mission almost made her fears come true. He was lucky to be alive, the team was lucky they didn't lose anyone. SHE was lucky he was alive.
He didn't say anything, he knew she was right. He reached and touched her slightly swollen abdomen.
She turned to face him. "We still have another hour or so left to this flight, so entertain me Commander."
"I was hoping you were going to say that" He wiggled his eyebrows enough to make sure she understood the hidden meaning.
She swatted his arm in jest and playfully scolded him. "That is not what I meant."
He sighed and smiled. "You sure you want to hear about it? I don't know if I could explain it without it sounding like a poorly written cop show".
She scoffed "A cop show? Were you a police officer?"
"Yes, no, sort of" he was confused.
"Now I really need to hear about this" her curiosity was getting the better of her.
"I was in Hawaii…"
She interrupted to clarify "So far makes perfect sense since that is our destination".
"Yeah but I was investigating my father's death." The sadness was written all over his face
She looked at him with concern "Steve; the doctors said your dad was going to be fine. The liver transplant was a success. If he continues to take his meds and stay away from those Longboards for a while, he will be fine".
Steve took a breath. "I know. I do worry about him. With the transplant and Aunt Deb's cancer diagnosis, I can't help but worry".
"That's one of the reasons we are relocating. To be closer to our parents and be there for Aunt Deb as best as we can"
He leaned in for a kiss. "Have I told you how much I love you today? "
"A few times" She smiled "So, you are a police officer investigating a death?" She tried to get him to focus.
"Not exactly a police officer, I was the head of an elite task force." He used his fingers to place quotations around the word elite.
Catherine raised her eyebrows in excitement "Ooh, like The Justice league?"
He corrected her "No, more like The Avengers".
She scoffed, "Ha! If I have to settle for an Avenger, please tell me it's, at the very least, Captain America"
He smiled, "of course, besides I know you have a thing for him".
"As if you don't crush on Mary Marvel." With her hands on her hips, she pointed out his obsession over the brunette superhero
He laughed. "So? I have a type" He wiggled his eyebrows and gave her a devilish grin
She blushed "Continue"
"Did I mention my mom was a spy who stole millions of dollars from her drug dealing lesbian lover?" he remarked with a sarcastic tone trying desperately to keep a straight face.
Catherine nearly spit out the drink she was sipping. "Your mom? A spy? The third grade teacher who can recite more trivia about Alexander Hamilton then Lin Manuel Miranda? Your mom who spends her time off doing magic tricks at the children's hospital? I won't even touch on the Freudian psychoanalysis regarding why you dreamed she was a lesbian." She took a beat "So, what was my mom, an evil scientist? "
"No, your mom was just your mom". He smirked.
"I won't ask you to clarify that." Steve got along fine with her mother since they had gotten married. It was the decade prior that had her wondering if this man was taking advantage of her daughter or was just waiting for the right time. She was happy it was the later.
"May I continue?" he asked
"Continue. Tell me about this task force" she was intrigued.
"I had three partners; no it was five, or maybe seven? I'm not sure it was unclear. Sometimes people were there and then would disappear without an explanation. It was confusing, almost like no one was supposed to notice" His brows furrowed; a sure sign he was trying to concentrate on the facts
"There was a rookie named Kono. I'm pretty sure it was the same Kono in that surf poster on Joan's wall. The one she idolizes. There was Chin Ho, that nice guy my dad had as a trainee and became close friends with. You remember him, we went to the same high school"
"Isn't that the guy whose records you demolished in football?" Cath tried to recollect who it was
"Yes, him" Steve smirked with pride. He continued "And there was a guy I don't recognize. I don't remember much, except the guy was annoying and constantly complained about everything. I think big Lou from that pizza place you like was there too but it's foggy. Oh and I'm pretty sure the Governor was Mrs. Jameson from next door"
Catherine sighed "I'm going to miss Mrs. Jameson. She is a spunky old lady and no one can put down a six-pack better than her"
"I never met a Navy man who couldn't find a woman a beer" Steve mimicked her accent "That was the first thing she said to me when we moved in to that apartment".
"She loves her beer and Navy men" Cath added
Steve smiled and continued "Ellie was there and so was Nahele but they didn't serve any real purpose. I don't know why they were there" he paused then added "Oh and Magnum PI was there."
Her eyes widened "Ooh, I love me some Tom Selleck.
He ignored her fangirling and continued "Eddie was in my dream too" his tone changed to sadness
"Oh Steve" she sighed "He is in good hands with Freddie and Kelly. We both know he is too old to make this trip. Besides, their kids love Eddie and he is going to have so much fun playing with them". Catherine tried to reassure him. Eddie was more than just a pet. Catherine was convinced he was the best therapy for Steve. Unconditional love and support only a dog can offer. They were inseparable.
He nodded in agreement "I know. They are going to spoil him rotten. I'm going to miss him"
"Me too" Catherine sighed
Pausing for a few seconds he continued "It is all kind of blurry. Sometimes I was in Hawaii, but sometimes I was in other places like North Korea, Japan, Afghanistan, and even Montana of all places. "
"Wow, that's almost as much traveling as you did in the navy." She listened as he continued
"It gets weirder. There was a robot, an elephant, and a giant claw. There was something about a flying cabin and I was stabbed in the back by a female serial killer..."
"That's odd, serial killers are usually male" Catherine focused on that one fact and ignored the ridiculousness of the others.
Steve continued "At one point I carried a nuclear bomb off a bus and dropped it from a helicopter into the ocean, but then I had a car battery strapped around my chest for protection against some kind of radioactive device" even he knew it sounded crazy.
"That doesn't sound very safe" she mocked him
He laughed "I'm pretty sure I was glowing in the dark at one point."
"Now it's starting to sound like an Avenger's movie. Was Thanos there too?" She was trying to make light of what she knew was a dream of his subconscious fears
He played along with her pretending to laugh "Ha ha ha, no but there was a villain named WoFat"
Catherine laughed out loud, immediately covering her mouth as she realized other passengers were staring. "Well considering every time you eat there you feel like you are going to die the next day, it makes perfect sense".
He agreed "I don't know why your father insists on eating there".
"He likes to torture you" she winked
"Speaking of….there was some of that too" He tried to make light if it but that segment of his dream felt all too real.
Catherine was shocked at this revelation "Omg!" she placed her hand on his arm "Steve that sounds more like a nightmare".
"No, it wasn't really that bad. It's not like I was BEHEADED or anything" Yes it was he thought but he wasn't going to let her know that "Commander White saved me"
"So far that is one of the few things that hold true. He has done that more than a few times over the years" She was grateful for Joe White.
"Yes he has" Steve agreed with a sigh. "Especially when he encouraged me to ask you out" he winked at her and grinned
"I'm glad you took his advice" She smiled
"It was good advice. I would have been foolish not to take it" he grinned
"Handsome and smart" she leaned in and gave him a peck on the forehead.
He paused for a few seconds before continuing "Taylor, Harrington, Cole and Rhodes where in my dream too, except Nick was a bad guy and they all ended up dead at some point".
Catherine paused and gathered her thoughts on the best way to approach. This was obviously a metaphor for his team being dismantled. Steve giving up his commission and dismantling the team had taken a toll on his psyche. They were brothers but it was time for them to hand over the reins to the younger generation. They were all ready to step back even if they themselves didn't know it at the time. With a deep breath she leaned over and gently nudged his shoulder.
"Nick Taylor a bad guy? I can see that" He was the one who always got them in trouble back in their younger days at the Academy.
"I'm going to tell him you said that. Oh, and Harrington was on a mission to seduce you away from me" He mentioned that as an afterthought but she knew it was bothering him.
"Seriously? You're still hung up on that? It was before we started dating; you really need to let it go, Steve. That was over 15 years ago" She hated to admit it but she loved seeing his jealous side every once in a while.
"That's ok Greer was in it too" he added pausing for her reaction. Two can play the jealousy game
"I see" was all she said diverting her eyes.
He tried to reassure her "Don't worry she was a villain. Pure evil. She was responsible for the murder of my entire team including Joe White"
"Did she give them all a STD? " She murmured the word slut under her breath
He scoffed and raised his hand in surrender. "I can't control my dreams honey".
"Honey? Really?" He never called her that. Ever.
"Should I continue?" he waited for her acknowledgement
She repositioned herself. "What was my role in this dream of yours?" She questioned
His expression grew serious and he wiped the stubble on his chin. He was not sure how to describe that version of her.
"Steve?" she feared for his response
He carefully thought out how to put this dream version of their relationship into words "It's just we weren't really together. What I am trying to say is we were together, living together, practically engaged, you were even on my task force at one time, and then we were apart. You left me at the altar or the porch? I'm not sure, it's unclear, but you left me to become a spy, just like my mother"
"Are we spies that do magic tricks? Do I have a code name? I might like that" She sarcastically remarked.
He rolled his eyes at her mocking then his expression suddenly grew worrisome. She could tell something was wrong. Reaching to take hold of his face, she turned his head to face hers. "I'm not going anywhere commander, you are not getting off that easy". She kissed him.
He sighed and his eyes grew dark. "I know. I don't know why but we kept losing each other"he hesitated "we always found our way back. Even in my dream…I knew you were the one…my girl… the one who was meant to be."
"Look, I know the separations were difficult. Both of us deployed on opposite sides of the planet, always worried if the other was safe, but we don't have to worry about that anymore." a single tear dropped from her eye.
He reached over and with his thumb he gently wiped the single tear that fell on her cheek "I didn't mean to make you cry. It was just a dream. It doesn't mean anything"
This dream means something, she just wasn't sure what "It must be the hormones" was all she could say.
She leaned into his arms and they cuddled for a while in silence.
Transitioning from the silence Steve pondered to Catherine "So, do you think your dad will let me drive the Stingray? "
"No. He doesn't let anyone drive it, except me" she smirked "but I know your dad is looking forward to working on that old Marquis with you"
He corrected her word choice "classic, not old"
Catherine rolled her eyes "of course, silly me"
"Have you thought about what kind of car you are going to buy? I am hoping to talk dad into letting me keep the Corvette" Catherine grinned.
Steve tilted his head "the Vette is not going to be very practical. I would love to get one of those new Camaros. It would be fun zipping around the island in it but I know a pick-up truck would be more practical. Maybe I will splurge and get a Silverado"
"I can totally see you driving a Silverado. Blue, you should get a blue one" She agreed with his choice of vehicles
"You know what else I was thinking? We could stop and pick up some spicy shrimp plates and some shave ice from that food truck we ate at last time we were there" Steve had a craving for it the moment they boarded the flight.
"We might need to put that off for another time. My mom mentioned she was making my grandmother's Ragu. She won't appreciate the detour" Her mother insisted on preparing a big meal to celebrate.
"I guess you are right. I am finally on her good side, I don't want to mess that up" he nodded
"She loves you….now" Catherine scrunched her nose and giggled
"Cute, real cute" Steve smiled as he leaned closer , gently nudging her shoulder.
Their playful banter was interrupted by the chime of the fasten seat belt sign and the announcement to prepare for landing.
Once the plane landed and the passengers filed down the gangway, Steve couldn't help notice the loud group of women with sashes that had the word bachelorette written in pink glitter draped across their shoulders. A blonde with sharply cut bangs and a sash labeled Bride caught his attention. She was the loudest and likely the most intoxicated of the group. He immediately lowered his eyes trying desperately not to make eye contact. He must have noticed them at some point prior to the flight because they had all made it into his dream. He did not want to have to explain their presence to Catherine. Truth be told he wasn't sure why they were in his dream, he wasn't particularly attracted to any of them, but he did know they must have been a mere distraction from the idea he and Catherine were no longer together. Even if it was just a dream, the thought of losing her must have put his mind into a downward spiral.
As they waited patiently for the passengers to file off the plane, a flight attendant with the nametag Lori motioned towards Catherine getting her attention. "Excuse me. Sorry to bother you but I love your tote bag. May I ask where you got it?" she asked
"Aw, thank you, I got it in a little boutique in Bangkok. One of the perks of being stationed overseas" she smiled
"You are in the military?" Lori was surprised.
"I was. Retired" Catherine looked down, directing attention to her belly
"Oh, congratulations and thank you for your service" She smiled
Steve beamed with pride as he listened to the exchange between the two women. He was proud of Catherine and her service.
He retreated into his thoughts as they made their way through the gangway and towards the baggage claim area. Finding himself replaying scenes from his dream, he made the connection to his insecurities and realized it was time to put it all behind. This was a fresh start and a new adventure for him and his family. Visits to the island had always given him a feeling of belonging and was the only place that ever felt like home. He was happy.
Catherine must have sensed what he was thinking "We are finally home. Home" she sighed "I can't remember the last time I felt like this" Between her childhood as a Navy brat and her own service, she rarely had a place to call home. "I can't believe your parents are giving us their house"
"To be honest, I can't believe it either. Dad said it was too big for them to maintain and wanted to downsize. I offered to pay rent, but they insisted it was a gift"
"I hope Mary isn't upset about that" Catherine and Mary got along great
"She prefers LA. As long as we have room for her and Joan to visit, she is fine with it" Steve and Mary were as close as siblings could be.
"I have to admit it is a beautiful house and the location is perfect to raise children, besides I have a feeling our parents will be spending a lot of time there" her hand instinctively cradled her belly. She found herself doing that a lot lately.
Steve smiled and leaned into her, his arms wrapped around her waist as they waited patiently for their luggage to appear.
A young Navy officer approached with trepidation and made his introduction. He saluted "Commander McGarrett sir" he acknowledged Catherine "Ma'am. Special Operator Junior Reigns. I don't know if you remember me sir, but I was in your weapons training class a while ago"
"Junior Reigns! Of course I do. What brings you to Hawaii?" Steve beamed
"I'm on leave. I just completed BUDs" the pride in Junior's face radiated
"Excellent! Congratulations" Steve patted the young officer on the back
"I just wanted to thank you for the recommendation sir. I would have never gotten in without it"
"Not true, you were the top of that class. But you are welcome" he accepted graciously.
As they continued with some small talk, Junior's eyes diverted to a young woman racing towards them shouting his name in pure jubilation. He excused himself as he ran towards her "Tani" he shouted as they embraced in a hug that rivaled any Amanda Savage romance novel.
"Remember when we were like that?" Catherine smiled at the scene playing out before her.
Steve smiled and tightened his grip as his arm was wrapped around her waist, leaning in for a kiss, he declared. "We are still like that"
Staring into each other's eyes they both knew that was true. After all these years they were still madly in love with each other.
Their romantic exchange was interrupted by a commotion happening near the customer service desk. They couldn't help but watch as the scene played out
"Every time! Every single time I come to this pineapple-infested rock in the middle of nowhere you destroy my luggage!" The short blonde man with the New Jersey accent was yelling at a young airline employee. The employee was doing his best and going out of his way in an attempt to comfort the man but was having no luck.
Steve started to approach in order to diffuse the situation when Catherine grabbed his arm "This isn't your fight Sailor. Let them handle this."
There was an urgency in Steve's voice "Cath, that's the guy in my dream; the annoying partner. We argued so much people thought we were a married couple".
"Couples who argue shouldn't be married" she pointed out the obvious "Steve, that's the same guy who caused a scene at the gate back in Houston."
"That's right. I didn't connect the dots. That's the guy who was trying to skip the line at the gate because his flight from Newark was delayed. He almost knocked you down! You should have let me confront him then".
"And get us all kicked off the flight? No way" Catherine was right. If Steve confronted him, things would have not ended well for anyone.
"I should go help the employee until security shows up" Catherine held a tighter grip on his arm "Steve, you are no longer obligated to be the hero. We are here to settle down until your retirement kicks in and have a calm normal lifestyle for once in our lives. We are not here to save the island from bad guys. You have been protecting everyone for so long it's time to take care of yourself. Let's leave this up to the HPD. Okay?"
He nodded reluctantly. Not engaging went against every fiber of his being "okay, but with all four of our parents on the same island, I'm not sure how calm or normal it will be"
"Like I said, free babysitting" she smiled a wry smile that he loved so much.
Keeping a safe distance from the chaos but remaining close enough in case the situation escalated, they waited for security to arrive before leaving the scene. Steve and Catherine approached the luggage carousel and as Catherine spotted their luggage coming around the corner, she reached to grab it when Steve stopped her. "Cath, no" he blocked her hand from grabbing the suitcase.
"Don't be a caveman. I am more than capable of doing this myself" she was angry with his action
"I know you are but please let me do this. We can't take any chances at your age" his protective instinct had taken over
"Are you saying I am getting soft?" she was annoyed
"Maybe a little" he smirked turning what could have been a heated exchange into playful banter
"Fine" she stepped back and allowed him the space to retrieve the suitcases. She was used to doing things for herself but she was also fully aware Steve was just being protective of her and their unborn child. Deep down she knew it was a SEAL thing and embedded in his persona.
After gathering their luggage they proceeded to stroll toward the exit where her father was picking them up. Stopping in their tracks, they were surprised to see both sets of parents holding leis and a large banner with the words ALOHA! Welcome Home! written across.
Holding hands, Catherine turned to Steve and with a smile asked "you ready?"
A grin stretched across his face as he looked her directly in the eyes "Yeah"
….
MAHALO
ALOHA, A HUI HOU