Don't ask me why I decided to write an AU of an AU, this was really just supposed to be a "for fun" little drabble that got out of hand after my discord egged me on so here we are with some more Angst. And family drama. Cause I'm a slut for that. Anyway this is basically set like... at some point in Keys that we're not at yet but we're rapidly approaching as of the time of me posting this sooooo yeah. Enjoy!
Oh by the way, for context, this is sort of a continuation/AU of the last AU, in which Xehanort is Sora's grandfather. Basic gist here:
Survival AU: Tsuki survives Xehanort's attempts at killing him by summoning his own Keyblade; he takes Sora and Himari and flees the islands, hopping from world to world to get his son out of his father's range. Throughout the years, Tsuki becomes very overprotective of Sora to the point of stifling him, and even refuses to teach him how to use his Keyblade after he summons one. Along the way, the family eventually joins up with the other Guardians of Light, though the events of Keys still happen and when they do, family drama abounds…
Survival
"Sora!"
His father's sharp call is enough to stop him dead in his tracks. His mind screams at him to keep running, to get as far away as possible before his parents can ever hope to see his shame. But his feet remain firmly planted in place, his heart pounding with unbearable dread as he hears their footsteps rapidly approach him from behind.
"There you are," Tsuki lets out an exhausted sigh as he finally reaches his missing son. Himari trails right behind him, her expression awash in a mix of relief and concern that only grows when she realizes Sora isn't turning around to face them. "What were you thinking, running off on your own like that? You have everyone worried sick. You know you're not supposed to go anywhere without having someone with you-"
"Dad," Sora interrupts, his voice tight and tremulous. His back is still turned to his parents, his hands tucked away in front of him so they can't see his claws, his hood up so they won't see his hair. "Just… l-leave me alone. Please."
"...Sora?" Himari frowns, extending a hand out to skim his shoulder. He swiftly pulls away the second he so much as feels her gentle touch.
"Don't be ridiculous," Tsuki counters much more crossly, the frustration in his voice quite clear. "We've been looking for you for weeks now. There's no way we're just leaving you out here alone. We're taking you back to the tower and that's where you're going to stay and I won't hear any arguing about it!"
"No!" Sora suddenly spins around, largely out without thinking. Tsuki and Himari both freeze, immediately noticing the darkness covering his hands, the crimson claws his fingers have become. And as Tsuki searches the shadows cast across his face by the cover of his hood, time seems to stop entirely when he sees a flash of gleaming gold within them.
"Sora," Tsuki's voice is stern, his manner authoritative as he stands tall over his frightened son. "Lower your hood. Now."
Sora steps back, his clawed hands pressed tightly against his chest as he shakes his head. "I-I can't," he mutters, averting his father's intense gaze, his mother's fretful frown.
"Why not?" Himari asks, her voice barely above a whisper.
"I-I… i-it's-" Sora cuts himself off with a startled gasp as Tsuki suddenly grabs him by the wrist, forcibly pulling him closer. Dread and fury both flash across his father's face as he gets a better look at the claws, as he inspects the shadows staining his skin. And then, without any warning at all, he reaches up, and, in one swift and sudden movement, pulls his son's hood down so they can finally fully see his face.
Tsuki can only barely hear Himari gasp in horror behind him. His ears are ringing, his blood feels like it's boiling hot as tears immediately start to spark in the corner of his eyes. A huge part of him hopes this is merely a nightmare, that in just a few seconds, he'll wake up and his son's hair won't be mostly white, his eyes won't be overtaken by a tide of garish yellow. But as more and more seconds pass by, the realization hits him hard, like a knife to his very own heart. That this is all too real, that it's his very worst nightmare finally come true.
"N-no…" he whispers, choking on a sob. Sora's crying too, he realizes, heartbreak and shame etched across every inch of his face. Tsuki's always hated seeing his son in tears, has always done everything in his power to make those tears go away. And while usually, he would have reached out and hugged his son to offer him calming, quiet promises that everything will turn out alright, right now, he can't even bring himself to try. "H-he's really… you… you're being…" His grip on Sora finally loosens as he shudders tearfully, not even noticing as Himari places her hands on his shoulders to support him.
"I didn't want either of you finding out…" Sora mutters, glancing down at the ground as he rubs his arm. "T-that's why I ran away. I'm sorry…"
Something shifts in Tsuki when he hears this, his grief sharpening into anger. Anger at his father for finally making good on his cruel promises from years ago, anger at himself for letting this happen to begin with… and anger at his son for secreting it all away. And unfortunately, the most he can really do at a moment like this is focus that anger on the one who probably deserves it the least. "Y-you're sorry?" he lets out a small, incredulous laugh. Tears continue pouring down his cheek as he runs a hand through his hair. Himari slips her hands away from him, her eyes wide as she exchanges an apprehensive glance with Sora, neither of them knowing what might possibly happen next. "You knew this was happening to you for who knows how long… and you're sorry?!"
"Tsuki," Himari warns, shaking her head. But her husband doesn't hear her, nor does he even seem to hear his son as he makes an anxious attempt at explaining himself.
"I-I just-" Sora stammers, his golden eyes wide with palpable fear. "I didn't know how to-"
"You should have said something!" Tsuki snaps harshly. "How long has this been going on anyway?"
"S-since the exam…" Sora replies softly, still averting his father's livid gaze.
An entirely new wave of fury flashes across Tsuki's face when he hears this. "This is exactly why I didn't want you training," he seethes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I told Mickey and Yen Sid, but did they listen to me? Of course not! They just decided to go behind my back and encourage you to use your Keyblade anyway. Just like you did, Sora, even after I told you time and time again that I didn't want that kind of life for you!"
"But Dad, that's not fair!" Sora protests, his former fear starting to fall by the wayside. "It's not their fault. I was the one that begged them to teach me how to use my Keyblade because you never would!"
"Because I knew this is what would happen to you if I did!" Tsuki argues back every bit as fiercely. Sora nearly asks for an explanation, for how his father could have possibly anticipated that any of this could have happened. But Tsuki doesn't give him that chance. "How have you managed to even keep this hidden from us this long anyway?"
"I-I, uh… I asked Donald to cast a glamor spell on me to hide… a-all this," Sora motions to his hair and eyes. "I-it worked… until it was undone…"
"Donald and Goofy knew about this?" Tsuki raises an eyebrow. "Who else did you decide to tell about this? Who else did you ask to keep this a secret from your own parents?!"
"No one!" Sora swiftly exclaims. "Donald and Goofy only found out about it on accident. I didn't want Riku and Kairi knowing, a-and I really didn't want either of you to know…"
"But why?" Himari speaks up, her tone far more gentler than her husband's. "Sora, if we'd known about this when it first started, then maybe we could have helped you so much sooner…"
Sora wavers under his mother's concerned, yet caring gaze, his shame only continuing to rise as he forcefully looks away. "I-I… I thought I could fix it on my own…"
"Well clearly, you can't," Tsuki remarks with a dismissive huff. "You're just lucky we found you before he did. Now," he lets out a long, steadying sigh as he takes Sora's hand and begins to pull him along. "Let's just go back to the tower and we can start working on a way to undo this mess before it's too late."
"No!" Sora rips his hand out of his father's grip. "I can't go back, not now, maybe not ever. It's… it's already too late to stop this…" His last statement comes out in a despondent whisper. Himari's heart aches when she hears it, but Tsuki cuts her off before she can sweep in to give their son the comfort he so clearly needs.
"What makes you think that?" he asks, his tone still far from sympathetic.
Sora wraps his arms around himself tightly, fear flickering across his face at the thought of a clearly unpleasant memory. "I-I… t-that's… what he told me…"
"Who?" Tsuki presses insistently. His heart practically drops into his stomach when he hears the quiet, terrified answer his son gives.
"Xehanort…"
"Tsuki…" Himari whispers before her husband can even get a word out. Tsuki's breathing shallows, his eyes wide as his hands clench into tight, trembling fists, the mere thought of his treacherous father even coming anywhere close to his beloved son practically making him see red.
"You saw him?" he asks quietly, his intense gaze fixated on his terrified son. "He spoke to you?"
Sora nods. "H-he wants me to be his thirteenth vessel," he admits, defeated, dejected. "I-I don't want that to happen! I don't, but… I can't stop this… I-I don't think anyone can…"
Himari steps forward, intent on pulling her son into a warm embrace to try and chase his lingering tears away. But Tsuki sweeps his arm out to stop her just before she can. "Well, maybe we could have stopped this if you'd just told us that it was happening to begin with!" he exclaims angrily.
"Tsuki!" Himari chastises, knowing that the last thing their son needs right now is to be treated so harshly. But of course, Tsuki doesn't recant, and neither does Sora as he counters this scolding crossly.
"This is exactly why I didn't tell you!" he huffs indignantly. "Because I knew this is how you'd react! You always get so upset whenever I do something you don't like. Well guess what, Dad? Now I am something you don't like! You say you hate Xehanort so much-well now I have a piece of his heart stuck inside of mine! So I guess that means you must hate me too, right?!"
"Sora!" Himari gasps, absolutely appalled by what she just heard. And yet a part of her hopes that it's somehow enough to pierce through Tsuki's ongoing anger, something that, unfortunately, it doesn't do in the slightest.
"Of course I don't," he says, but his tone is so cold that Sora has a hard time believing him. "I've spent years trying to protect you, to keep this very thing from happening to you. I could have saved you from this before it even started, but you wouldn't let me! I can't fix the mistakes you-I mean we might have made before, but I can fix this now before it gets any worse than it already is. Which is why," he takes Sora's hand again, this time locking it into an almost crushing grip. "You're coming home with us so we can do exactly that."
"No, I'm not!" Sora shouts as he struggles to pull his arm away. "I'm not going anywhere with you! I'm not going to let you force me back into a cage! Never again!"
"Sora, what in the worlds are you talking about?" Tsuki glances back at him incredulously. "We've never tried putting you into a cage, we never would-"
"Yes, you have!" Sora argues back as he finally tears his arm out of his father's hold. "That's all you've ever done, ever since we left the islands! You never let me go anywhere or do anything on my own-you never let me have any freedom!"
"Well now that you do have freedom, look at what it's costing you!" Tsuki shoots back sharply. "You don't even know how to take care of yourself on the most basic level-by the stars, Sora, you look like you haven't eaten or slept in weeks. And that's not even mentioning everything he's doing to you from the inside out. I would have thought that something like this would finally help you realize how much you need me, but somehow you still think you can manage on your own. But it's clear to me now more than ever that you can't, at least not until he's gone for good."
"But Dad-"
"As soon as we get back, I'll be the one keeping a close eye on you personally, every minute of every day, even after we find a way to fix this."
"Tsuki," Himari says with a disapproving scowl, but once again her husband ignores her. Just as he always seems to do anymore, as if she doesn't get a say in what happens to their son anymore. "You can't just-"
"You can't lock me up like that!" Sora nearly begs, tears forming in his eyes "You can't lock me up like she did!"
"Maleficent would have never had the chance to lock you up if I had been there to protect you in the first place," Tsuki counters sternly, not even seeming to care for the remnant distress such a memory causes his son. "If you can't be bothered to keep yourself safe, then I will. No matter what it takes…"
When Tsuki reaches out to restrain Sora once more, this time Himari is the one to sweep in and stop him, positioning herself firmly between her son and her husband. "Tsuki! That's enough!" she shouts furiously, her blue eyes shining with oncoming tears.
"Himari, what are you-"
"You have to stop!" she yells at him, distraught and desperate. "Look at our son, Tsuki," she motions back at Sora, who looks between his mother and father with wide, anxious eyes. "Don't you see how scared he is?"
"I know, Himari," Tsuki counters flippantly. "We're all scared of what Xehanort is doing to-"
"Not of Xehanort," Himari interrupts, her tone as icy as her expression is. "Of you."
Tsuki takes pause at this, glancing between his wife and his son. Both of them wear the same kind of despair on their faces, the same sort of sad exhaustion. Sora's always looked much more like his mother, something Tsuki's found himself grateful for in the past, if only because it makes him look much less like his wicked grandfather. But right now, the resemblance between them, the terrified grief they both share, works against him in so many ways that he can barely stand to look at either of them. "Y-you… don't know what you're talking about," he says, glancing away. "Neither of you do."
"D-Dad…" Sora speaks up, but Tsuki swiftly silences him.
"Himari," he addresses his wife instead. "I thought you said you were with me on this. No matter what happened."
"I-I am," Himari nods. "I was. Until you decided that Sora needed to be trapped to be what you think is 'safe'."
"It's the only way, Himari," Tsuki says, a small hint of remorse finally slipping into his tone. "All I've ever done, the only thing I've always wanted is to protect my son from anything or anyone who might want to hurt him."
"He's my son too, Tsuki," Himari protests earnestly. "I should get at least some say in what happens to him, don't you think?"
"Mom, I-I…" Sora interjects, but whatever he wants to say falls short when his mother looks back at him with a soft, reassuring smile. One that comes with the promise that she's on his side, even when his father so clearly isn't.
"You don't understand," Tsuki shakes his head, scowling. "You have no idea what could happen to him if Xehanort has his way. We could lose him forever, Himari."
"We're already losing him," Himari counters, her tone as even as it possibly can be. "You've spent all this time trying to keep him close to you that you aren't even noticing that he's spent the last several years drifting away from you. You love Sora, Tsuki, I know you do. But you don't know him anymore at all."
Tsuki flinches upon hearing this, his gaze shifting over to Sora for confirmation of this fact. He averts his sight, looking down as he mutters his morose response. "She's right…. You don't…"
Only now does he start to realize his mistake. But he's in far too deep to undo it now, not when there's so much more at stake then his mere relationship with his son. Not when he could risk that son being taken from him entirely by the man he hates more than anyone else. The man who's ruined both his and his son's lives in so many more ways than one. "This conversation is over," he says, turning his back on the pair. "We're all going home, right now. We'll find a way to sort this all out. And once we do… Well, we'll figure out what happens next from there."
"Tsuki, please," Himari urges, but Sora pipes up before she can say anything else, absolutely adamant at his own father's sheer stubbornness. A trait he so clearly inherited from him.
"No! I already told you, I'm not going back!" he shouts, his clawed hands curled into trembling fists. "You can't make me!"
"I can and I will," Tsuk sternly insists. "You've wasted enough of whatever time you have left already. You're done running, Sora. From this… and from us. We're taking you back, whether you like it or not."
"What, just so you can lock me up all over again?!" Sora shouts, hating how his father feels like he has no agency here, like he doesn't deserve any in the first place. Maybe he doesn't, after everything he's done, but still, he can't bear the thought of simply falling in line with the kind of miserable, empty life his father wants for him. Not now, or ever again. "Even if you do, it won't stop what's happening to me! Just face it already, Dad; you can't protect me from this! Nothing you can say or do is going to save me anymore, so stop trying to act like you always know what's best for me, because you don't!"
"I do!" Tsuki harshly shoots back, spinning around to face him. "In fact, I might be the only one who knows how to free you from this. I'm the only one who knew this was going to happen because he told me what he wanted to do to you years ago!"
"W-what?" Sora starts, alarmed by this baffling news. His father barely hears him however, as he keeps going, prompted onward by so many different horrible thoughts and feelings that it's hard to keep track of them all.
"And every single day since then, I've done everything in my power to keep that from happening. I forced myself to summon a Keyblade, I uprooted our lives back on islands, I kept us-you-hidden from him in any I could. Every single thing I've ever done in the past 8 years was all for you, Sora!"
"D-Dad…" Sora falters at this, guilt swelling in him as he hears his father let out a heartbroken sob.
"Tsuki?" Himari reaches out toward him, but he pulls away, covering his eyes as he tries and fails to hold back tears.
"And even after all that... it still wasn't enough," he says, shame and guilt mingling in his voice. "He still got his hands on you all the same. But no more." He wipes his tears away, bitter resolve rising in him as he faces his family squarely, as he looks his son straight in his now golden eyes. "I'm not letting him win this time, not ever again. He doesn't get to steal you from me; you're my son, and I'm gonna make sure he knows that." He looks around the surrounding area, already knowing Xehanort must be waiting somewhere in the wings, lurking and watching, just as he's always done. "You hear me, old man?!" he shouts into the open air. Sora and Himari look to each other in startled confusion as Tsuki furiously shouts his piece. "I'm not about to let you ruin him like you nearly ruined me! Unlike you, I actually care about my son! I'm willing to go to the ends of every world to save him from you! And I'm going to do whatever it takes to protect him, whatever it takes to prove that I'm ten times the father you ever were to me!"
He shouts this before he can even realize who he's just said it in front of. He realizes a moment later, a sharp gasp escaping him as he covers his mouth, but it's already too late. He looks past Himari, whose expression is already filling in with rising panic over the long-kept secret her husband at long last let slip. A secret she's been in on for years now, but their son who stands behind her, had no idea about in the slightest.
"Y-your father…" Sora starts, trailing off softly as he tries to piece it all together. His face is a mask of disbelief, of dawning realization and emerging horror as he stares at Tsuki, completely mystified. "X-Xehanort is… your father?"
"S-Sora," Tsuki chokes, shaking his head. His mouth is dry, words failing him as he tries to come up with some sort of excuse, some way to take back the one thing he never wanted his son knowing. But by all accounts, it's far too late for that now. Far too late to take back any of the awful things he's said, really, as much as he wishes he could. "I-I… just… listen, I-"
"Wait," Sora cuts him off as he glances down at his own clawed hands, tugs at a hanging piece of his own whitening hair. "I-if… if Xehanort is your father, then… t-that means… he's my-"
"Oh, Sora, sweetie…" Himari places a gentle hand against his face as he cuts himself off with a tight, anguished sob. "I-I'm so sorry. We never wanted you to find out like this. We-"
"Y-you knew about this?" he pulls away from his mother, distrustfully glancing between both of his parents now. "Ever since we left the islands, all the time we spent running from world to world… i-it was because we were running from my own grandfather?"
"Sora, listen to me," Tsuki says, forcing his voice to be firm and steady. "That man isn't your grandfather. He's only my father in name only. He didn't raise me, he never cared about me, and he certainly doesn't care about you. He sees you only as a prize to be won… and me as the only thing getting in the way of him winning that prize."
"So you decided to keep me from him by hiding me away?" Sora accuses hotly. "You didn't once think to tell me who he was to us or about what he wanted to do to me or to actually teach me how to defend myself from him?!"
"I-I… I thought you wouldn't have to defend yourself from him," Tsuki admits, feeling foolish even as he does. "I thought… I-I'd always be there… to protect you from him instead…"
"Yeah, Dad, you sure did a great job at that because look at me now!" Sora snaps, motioning at himself and his corrupted appearance. "You spent all that time 'protecting' me that I never even had a chance to keep something like this from happening to me. I keep thinking that it's my fault that I'm too weak to stop any of this, but it's not. It's yours."
"Sora!" Himari protests, shaking her head upon hearing such vicious claims. "Don't say things like that!
"No, h-he's right…" Tsuki mutters, tears streaming down his cheeks. "H-how could I have not seen this coming? All these years trying to prevent this, a-and I didn't even think about… I-I just… I thought I was doing what was best for you, son…"
"Yeah, and look where that's got me," Sora scowls as he turns away from both of his parents. "I hope it was all worth it, Dad. Because now I'm the one who has to pay for your mistakes. As far as I can tell, you're no better than Xehanort-or should I call him Grandfather-himself."
Tsuki says nothing to this, mostly because he can't. Sora's not wrong, he knows he's not. By all accounts, Tsuki realizes in unbearable guilt and growing grief, he might be even worse than his father had ever been.
Sora holds out his hand and a dark corridor comes to life, eliciting a shocked gasp from Himari when she sees his newfound power. "Sora, wait-" she reaches out to him, but he swiftly pulls himself out of her range.
"Don't follow me," he warns, glaring back at his parents. "There's no use anyway; you can't save me, no matter what you do. And at least now, I'll finally be able to have something neither of you ever let me have: freedom."
"Sora!" Himari calls after him, but he's gone before she can ever hope to stop him. His dark corridor disappears as soon as he steps through it, and just like that, their son is lost to them once more. Lost in so many ways she couldn't even hope to list them all if she wanted to.
Silence lingers between the couple for what feels like years. Tsuki is beside himself in despair, his own remorse threatening to suffocate him completely. But the longer Himari stands there, the more she thinks about how miserable her son had been, how miserable he's always been really, the more she realizes she's shared quite a bit of that misery herself over the years. What had once been a happy family on the shores of a picturesque island had been ruined over the last several years, as they fled from that island, as they found themselves entangled in a conflict that courses through her husband's very blood, through her son's blood as well. And now, in the wake of the hurricane that continues to tear their lives apart at the seams, all Himari can really do now is try to find some sort of refuge from it. Even if that refuge isn't by her husband's side.
"I'm done," she speaks, her voice soft and sad.
"W-what?" Tsuki glances over at her, tears still streaming down her cheeks.
"I'm done, Tsuki," she looks back at him, her blue gaze sharp and piercing. "I'm done with this, with running and hiding and fighting and standing on the sidelines as you try to do exactly what Sora accused you of. As you try to keep him locked in a cage."
"H-Himari, no, I-"
"Don't," she hisses as he reaches a hand out toward her. "Ever since we left the islands, you've always acted like you're the only one who knows how to protect our family. But look what's happened, Tsuki! Our son is gone, his heart on the verge of being corrupted by your own father! And it's all because you never trusted him enough to defend himself. And because you never trusted me enough to do the same…"
Tsuki shudders, his heart aching under her beautiful, yet bitter gaze. "I-I was just… I was only trying to-"
"I know what you were trying to do," Himari sighs, glancing away wistfully. "Your heart has always been in the right place, Tsuki. You only wanted to keep him safe, and so did I. But… we failed. You failed…"
"I… I know," Tsuki admits, hanging his head in shame. "I'm sorry…"
"That's not enough," HImari gently skims the side of his face, her eyes shining with tears. "I love you, Tsuki, I always have, through everything we've been through together. But I can't stand by and watch you, or your father, or your legacy hurt our son any longer. Which is why… I-I think we need to head our own separate ways."
"W-what?" Tsuki freezes at this, his heart plummeting as he looks to his wife in disbelief. "H-Himari, no, we… y-you can't, I-I… I love you, I need you, please, don't-"
"Shh," she places a gentle finger against his lips, smiling sadly as she does. "Our family is broken, Ki… Someone has to fix it."
"I-I'll fix it then," he insists, taking both of her hands in his and holding them tight. "I'll do whatever it takes, I promise, I'll do better, I'll be better, j-just, please, Mari, don't leave me!"
"No," she shakes her head, pulling her hands away. "I have to leave you, Ki. I'm going to find our son and bring him home, but I'm not going to force him back like you wanted to. Whether you like it or not, Sora is growing up so quickly. E-even if… when he makes it through this, you can't hold onto him forever. Neither of us can."
"I-I know," he nods as he lets out another soft sob. He realizes how pathetic he must be, standing here crying his eyes out in front of his wife while she remains constant and calm. But he can't help it. At this point, she's the only shred of family he really has left. "I just… I-I only wanted to give him what my father never did, I-I wanted him to have everything I never got, I… I just... wanted him to be happy-"
"But he never was," Himari protests earnestly. "And that's the whole problem." She leans in, carefully kissing him on the cheek before she pulls away, leaving him desperate for more. "I don't know what's going to happen next," she admits as she turns away from him. "I don't even know how to begin to stop your father once and for all. I'll leave that to you and the other lights. But I do know this; my son-our son is out there, struggling and hurting. He's alone and he feels unloved and unwanted and afraid of his own family and of himself. So I'm not going to stop until I find him and find a way to help him. And maybe while we're both gone, Tsuki, you'll manage to find yourself in the meantime."
With that, she walks away, disappearing into the night as she leaves him behind to slowly, tearfully fall to his knees. As she leaves him alone to mourn everything he's just lost. To grieve his family, now torn apart and scattered and ruined, not by his father's doing as he always feared would happen-
But by his very own.
Oof Big Drama Hours over here huh? Anyway I'll just shut up now and crawl back into my regular hole to work on the next real chapter of Keys. But before then, please don't forget to leave a REVIEW on this letting me know what you think! Until next time (whenever that is, idk let's see the next time I get inspired)