Author's note: Hi again! Thank you for the reviews, they made me very happy and I am glad to see some of you are intrigued. But please remember this story is not professionally edited or betad. I am writing for fun, not to be famous. It is something in my head and I have decided to share with you. I welcome helpful criticism even if it is negative. I do not welcome downright rude comments. I am an adult and can be talked to like one so if there's anything wrong that you see, let me know in a productive way.

Disclaimer: Trigger Warning! Strong language, mental health subjects, addiction, drugs, alcohol, eating disorders, sexual content.

...

"Now and then, I think of all the times you screwed me over

But had me believing it was always something that I'd done

But I don't wanna live that way

Reading into every word you say

You said that you could let it go

And I wouldn't catch, you hung up on

Somebody that you used to know"

Somebody That I Used to Know - Gotye

...

My mouth wants to fall on the floor and my stomach wants to lurch. I can't tell if it's the shock that my dad is really gone or the flood of feelings tingling like a fire is starting in my body, but I can't move. I can't do anything. I don't even think I'm breathing.

"What?" I let out the gust of air I had been holding.

My Devil pulls a chair from behind her and sits, crossing her legs and placing her hands on knees. "What are you going to do now, bitch?" She laughs at me.

"Fuck," I say.

Rose pulls my arm and we are back in my old bedroom where I don't want to leave. It still looks perfect. The rose gold and white decorations, the posters of quotes Renee made me hang as a reminder to be better than yesterday self.

I roll my eyes at the thought.

"I'm sorry." Rose paces in the small but cozy bedroom. "Emmett just texted me that he was at the funeral and after seeing him drive the same route he figured out he was coming here. I didn't know he was coming or even there... I would have kicked his-"

I shake my head and she quiets.

I take a deep breath and force my confidence to come out, pushing both my Devil and Angel to the side. She shines bright in all white with a shimmer of gold. She walks perfectly in her all white strappy stilettos I could never pull off and a suit that fits her figure perfectly. Her hair blows in the wind and her make up is spotless.

I pull my shoulders back and tuck a piece of hair behind my ear while looking up at Rose.

She's so beautiful with her perfectly curled blonde hair, completely opposite from Charlie. Her skin is pale in the all black long dress she wears. Her cleavage peaks perfectly but modestly. Her blue eyes are much brighter than my dad's. She looks like she sleeps well and doesn't miss her children's school programs. Her and her husband, Emmett, are inseparable and they love it that way. Their comfortable home sits on a hill with three acres surrounding it. Their twins are beautifully blond like her, but a flawless mixture of their parents. Boy and girl, inseparable but independent. They're smart, they know boundaries but they aren't sheltered. Rose would never do what her own parents did to her.

"It's fine. Let's go." I say with a straight face. I can't even offer a smile because who knows what that will look like.

"Ugly." My Devil smirks in the corner she was forced into.

Confidence holds both of her middle fingers up to her and Devil cowers, only slightly.

After fixing her hair and smoothing her outfit, Confidence reminds me that I am not the same twenty one year old girl recovering from a perfect mother, eating disorder and a failing marriage. I'm not wishing for attention from the people who brought me into this world or anyone for that matter. I'm not falling for lies and false hope for someone to take me away.

I am twenty five and I'm my own damn savior. I can handle myself.

I can handle him too. He's been gone for too long. He can't have the same influence over me he once did, right?

Rose continues to look at me, waiting for my forced smile to falter.

I'm honestly exhausted and if I don't put on this brave face, I won't make it in front of anyone here, mourning the loss of the one they called friend and I called Dad.

"Are you sure?"

I only nod, continuing to smile but refusing to speak afraid I will give in and stay in my room for the rest of the evening.

She doesn't look like she believes me so I make the first move and walk out my bedroom as confident as I can be.

I take the stairs one by one. I haven't slept enough to be waking in these stilettos and my feet already hurt.

Downstairs is decorated with dozens of flowers. Roses, lilies and sunflowers. Sunflowers were Charlie's favorite, but I don't think anyone really knows that.

Or maybe they did.

He did call me sunflower until I decided that "Bella" was more fitting for me. He decided to call me "Belly" even though he knew I hated it.

There's a large picture of Charlie on a stand in the living room with his old police uniform on. It's next to the fireplace I never saw him use. His friends sit around, joking and drinking. I wouldn't be surprised if they were taking turns putting needles in each other's arms despite losing their "friend".

I roll my eyes and keep the fake smile plastered on my face.

"Hi," I say to multiple people. "Thank you for coming."

I move through the room swiftly, like Renee taught me. I shake hands and smile. I make sure people are getting drinks and food because I don't need the leftovers. I know Rose and Emmett bought too much and I knew they would. I plan to be out of here in two weeks tops to finalize everything and place the house on the market. Rose knows a decent realtor or two.

I make my way outside. It is less cramped and the fresh air is welcoming. The cars fill up the grassy yard. Some of the kids from the reservation run around in the leaves, squealing with joy as someone loses their game of tag.

I make my way back to the gazebo. It looks as nice as it could for not being used in years. It could use a paint job.

"Bella." I hear him before I sit.

I came out here for a break but I won't be getting one. If he's been here since the funeral, there has to be a reason.

I hold my breath as I turn around. I don't fake a smile, I don't say anything. I think I glare and maybe even laugh at him.

"What do you want?" I spit, feeling my Confidence, Angel and Devil coming together to unite and be strong in front of this man who was once a boy... my boy.

...

Author's note: A lot of the chapters are short, it flows better that way. I hope you all will still enjoy it though. Leave a review! Also, if you spot any mistakes or anything is confusing please let me know. See you all in chapter 3!