Chapter 2, in which some discover that others are crazier than they seem
The knife flew through the air, thumped sideways at the wooden wall and dropped to the floor, almost hitting the large brown tabby cat napping in the sunny spot at the bench nearby.
The cat mewed in fright and complaint against such a rude awakening, jumped off and hid under the bench.
"Pumpkin, are you ok?!" Klara ran to the other side of the house and peered under the bench at the offended cat. "Andraste! I am a menace to those close to me..." She mumbled softly, and carefully scooped up and cradled the feline in her arms. In her mind's eye she kept replaying her off-aim throw and her imagination helpfully supplied less than optimal for the cat outcomes.
She found him during her first excursion out of Haven shortly after joining the Inquisition. She flashed back to that time, it was just several months ago yet felt like much longer.
She was travelling back from Radcliffe's with Cassandra, Solas and Varric. Given Klara's general lack of physical exertion in the last ten years of her life, and the resulting lack of stamina, the group was moving quite a bit slower than expected. While Varric and Solas were content with the leisurely stroll and frequent breaks, the Seeker was not. She didn't say anything but her desire to get back to the safety of Haven was obvious. Klara could understand her irritation with the delays. After all, it was Cassandra who had the unfortunate role of protecting Klara during skirmishes with Templars and Mages and creatures from the rifts, and not to forget the simple creatures of the forest. Even healing potions had their limits and the Seeker must be physically and mentally exhausted from frequent hurts. Every delay meant more time spent in the open and in danger of ambush or confrontation. Naturally, Klara's request to stop early for the night was met with exasperated sighs , until the group noticed the abandoned barn. It was the only mostly intact building in the area. Klara insisted on staying there, arguing that staying in a safe place to sleep was beneficial to several more hours of walking, and then sleeping on the ground among wolves and bears.
Surprisingly, the Seeker agreed quicker than Klara expected, which only confirmed Klara's concern.
And that's is where they met Pumpkin. The barn had a definite mice and rats population. The rats were quickly extinguished by Solas though; and the mice hid when people settled in for the night. That's when all four became aware of the tiny whimpering sounds similar to but not quite like the hungry whines of a newborn baby.
The young cat huddled in the middle of the hollowed out pumpkin. It was large, fully grown, but very skinny, with big green eyes, and the coat so dirty and caked with mud that only some patches indicated the brown stripe coat pattern common among the local domestic felines.
"Don't touch! It could be sick!" Cassandra's warning came a bit too late. The Herald of Andraste was cradling the skinny form in her arms, softly whispering something to the animal.
"I'm not a child, Seeker." Klara's mouth spotted a soft smile. "Solas I know you are a people healer, but could you please try to help him, please?"
"Actually, it should not be that much different, not with the warm-blooded animals, at least"
Klara sighed, the rest was history. The cat, Pumpkin, stayed with her. He now spotted a small belly and shiny beautiful fur of a well-fed healthy animal. He had a peculiar trait to only eat people's food, preferably from a real plate, which certainly explained his state of starvation in the barn full of prey.
Most of the time Klara felt the cat was the only creature she was able to save. And even he had just barely escaped her ineptness around weapons.
Klara sighed again. They'd just returned from the sea coast, and all three of her companions were seriously hurt. The creatures from the coast rifts were stronger and had different tricks than what they encountered before. To make things even worse, Klara was too slow disrupting the rifts and weakening the creatures. And her companions suffered because of her.
She looked down at the purring cat in her arms. She almost killed him just now. Her desire to at least master daggers so as not to be such a failure backfired. She recalled again how the knife left her hand too soon and flew straight where the cat was sleeping, more than 10 feet off course she planned for it.
She looked further down at the bright red scar running almost the full length of her calf. This was the only reminder from the rift fight that left her team out of healing potions and still so badly hurt that they had to rest at the camp until more potions we're brewed and the horse carriage was put together to carry them back to Haven. Stubbornly she refused any treatment beyond basic bandages until they got back to Haven and everyone else got looked at, and so now she'll surely have a scar. She didn't care about her looks, this was not the main or the only flaw of hers, but this was now a very visible reminder of her failures, of the danger she presented for her team.
Klara hugged the cat carefully.
"Oh Pumpkin, what am I going to do. They surely must hate me now, everyone was so badly hurt."
She recalled the broken shape of the Seeker, her shield the only thing holding her up, positioned just so, so that Klara will have the most coverage from spirit flash attacks. She recalled Solas' motionless figure, most of the light armor charred and some parts completely burned away by the fire demons, eyes open, blindly staring at the sky. She thought he was dead. Varric was just a fraction better, his eyes were blinking.
Same anger, fear and horror as a week ago flashed over Klara. She knew it was all her fault. If she was able to at least protect herself, if she was agile enough to stay out of the way long enough to disrupt the rift, Cassandra wouldn't be looking out for two, and others would have the space and the distance they needed to be most effective and safe. Instead, Solas had to stay close enough to set the protective barriers around her, when Cassandra was the one who needed the barrier the most. And Varric had to engage threats closest to Klara instead of the most vulnerable enemies.
Klara could feel tears of frustration and despair rolling up to her eyes, closing her throat, stuffing her nose.
"If they could detach my hand without breaking the stupid rift-closing anchor, and attach it to someone more deserving to be a Herald, I suspect they would."
She scratched behind the cat's ear and the cat purred in response to signal his pleasure at the action. She stared at some distant spot at the wooden wall.
" You know, Pumpkin, you and I are quite a pair. We both are so bad at our assigned duties. Maybe that is the reason we get along so well, huh? You don't hunt and surely will starve without me. And I, well I don't 'hunt' either, and surely will die without my teammates."
Klara played with a cat for a while longer. She wanted to do the same thing she had done for several days and nights now. She wanted to wallow and feel sorry for herself.
"Enough! I haven't seen anyone since we got back from the coast. This must change. It is bad enough that Cassandra almost caught me crying on several occasions at the coast, it would be devastating for morale if people here would even suspect the same! I should check up on everyone, they saved my life ten times over on that trip."
The cat mewed his displeasure at being placed at the hard bench from the soft lap of his benefactor, but otherwise stayed put and made no move to follow Klara.
"I see you are feeling better, Cassandra" Leliana didn't leave her tent too often, but the events from the last excursion troubled her greatly.
"Good to see you exploring the camp, Spymaster" the Seeker teased, but immediately fell serious. "This was too close. I must train, and I must adapt to the situation."
"How so? Surely you don't blame yourself for the events…" Leliana read the reports on the fight and aftermath. The only way she thought the Seeker could have done more if she suddenly split into two.
Cassandra had a lot of time to reflect, first while trying not to breathe too deeply in the barely moving on the carriage to Haven; and then for several days of low mobility it took to recover enough to get back to normal.
"We keep expecting her to be more, to become more... simply because she got the mark"
"You don't believe she is the Herald of Andraste?"
Cassandra expected the question, and still it gave her pause.
"I do believe she is the Herald, even if she doesn't…. And Leliana, she doesn't, not in her heart."
Leliana knew the Right Hand long enough to know there is more. And sure enough Cassandra continued:
"I also came to a thought, we don't really know whether Andraste chose her despite or because of her… perceived limitations. And yet we have… at least I have… I have treated her as less than expected."
" Perhaps there is truth in it. What do you suggest we do to adapt to the Herald we have?"
"In the short while, I must treat every excursion with her as a protective duty rather than an assault event. If the engagement appears too hard or unexpected we must scout and prepare extensively before engaging. The creatures in that last rift were stronger, faster and with attack abilities we didn't see before." The Seeker rubbed her forehead, thinking about the events of that day made her head hurt, "We didn't have correct defenses against them and only Solas was able to be effective with his attacks. Yet we remained to fight… If I was thinking in the protective mode, I would have called retreat after the first several exchanges. "
"I see… Inquisition cannot retreat indefinitely though."
" I know."
"What would be needed for your group to be back into attack mode while ensuring Herald's safety?"
"We need to have at least one other fighter, a warrior or rogue, and ideally one more mage."
"I do have potentially good news in that area. It should ease your part on the road"
"You have?"
"Josi and the Qunary you met at the Storm coast finally ironed out a deal. He and his group are going to join us in a couple of months, after they resolve pending commitments"
"Good. I am concerned with him being an active Qunary agent, but he is a formidable fighter."
"Also we have a lead on another potential fighter, a warden. The rumor is he camps in the plains and forests to the east from here."
" Even better! We will head out soon then to find him. Do you..." Whatever she wanted to ask she stopped, and at the same time the loud din of voices at the training ground went down. Leliana followed her gaze. The Herald was walking towards them.
"The imposed isolation is over then."
"Leliana…"
"Fine, I'll try not to expect more from her than what she has. But she could have at least visited you three while you were recovering. It is hardly the imposition on her."
Cassandra let out a small grin. Leliana may be scary and stony to outsiders but she was very protective of those she deemed her circle.
" Your Grace"
"Leliana. Cassandra. It is good to see you both. I apologize for staying in so long."
The women exchanged glances.
" I should go, Your Grace, I've been away from the tent for too long and I expect scouts any moment."
Klara briefly nodded at the departing Spymaster and looked up at the waiting warrior.
"How are you feeling, Seeker?"
"I've recovered fully Your Grace, and am ready for another excursion."
The Herald cringed at the mention of another excursion, but nodded all the same.
"Let's hope it is less exciting than the last one." She said softly so as not to carry to the sparring soldiers.
"Herald,"
"Seeker.."
". about the last…" Cassandra stopped at the raised in pause gesture hand.
" Before I lose my nerve, please let me finish." The tone was still soft but Herald's eyes were angry, though not at Cassandra.
"I am deeply sorry for the peril my lack of skill and physical ability put us in… put you in. I don't expect you can forgive me or respect me but I do hope you will help me get better."
Cassandra didn't believe her ears, if anyone should be apologizing it was her for not protecting Herald as she should have. Seeker felt the blush of embarrassment spreading over her face. If the woman didn't have a mark on her hand, if she was simply a new recruit, Cassandra would never have taken her on half of the trips they took over the last three months, and would not put her in many situations that she did. It took several days of involuntary reflection before she realized that.
"Herald.." but the short woman's hand stopped her once more.
"Please. Let me finish." Cassandra sighed unhappily but nodded.
"I don't think I can be even an average with a weapon… and we established I'm no mage." Herald sighed, a startled complaining cat flashed through her mind. " But I could learn to keep things at bay like with the stick when we first met. Of course now I know that the Shade was weak and the simple stick might not be useful in all cases… but still…"
Klara fell silent, debating something, but Cassandra remained silent sensing the woman had something else to say.
"And perhaps we can look into several artifacts I researched that are rumored to give strong protection to the wearer. They are cumbersome for a warrior or a mage…but ..." a bitter smile flashed and disappeared from Klara's features. "But that won't be a problem in my case."
Klara fell silent, eyes downcast. Talking like that was hard for her. The activities she'd undertaken before came easy for her. She genuinely enjoyed reading and research, both live and dead languages were easy to figure out she could see the patterns in the texts, and even tedious copying of the text and songs wasn't so tedious when she added art to her versions of the manuscripts.
Physical endeavors were completely different things. As a child and youth she enjoyed travels with her family, long hikes were adventures and the world was full of curiosities.
It all changed when half of her family was cut down in front of her. Adrian searched for security in rigors of Templar life and Stephan was almost relieved to be taken to the Circle and under the protection of scores of armed Templars. And Klara, she looked for security in the walls of the Chantry. And now it was all gone. She had to be in the world, had to often confront people and creatures, and change the world to her liking. She didn't think she was up to the task, she didn't want the task, and yet she had no options. It was profoundly embarrassing to admit defeat, and it was distressing to be in a place where she wasn't a useful and productive member of the community.
Cassandra stayed silent looking at the top of the bent head of the shorter woman, her face obscured by thick hair. With constant travelling Klara's hair grew longer, now falling till the middle of her back in a barely tamed dark wavy mane. Seeker had trouble trying to come up with words. The Herald managed to twist reality and assign herself the blame which was truly not hers. She couldn't be more than she was, to have her apologize for that was really not fair. To say so without upsetting or offending Klara further was the tricky part for the notoriously bad with words Seeker.
"You must be quite upset with me… I… I know the feeling… Please think about what I asked."
The next moment the Herald was gone, purposely striding in the direction of the smithy.
The four Inquisition heads gathered around the war table. The only person missing was Herald. This by itself was not an unusual circumstance. She was absent in the majority of the meetings during the last fortnight. The difference this time was that Klara was the one to request the meet, and all four were very curious as to why.
"So, Commander, I hear the Chargers mercenary group arrived early, and already made an impact on our troop morale."
"Hmm.. well, Leliana, if by the impact you mean a troop wide amusement due to the unlikely winner of the sparring match between Iron Bull and Varric, then yes."
"Did they play for a dare then?" Josephine regretted staying in the temple and missing the commotion the camp was chatting about all day.
The answer was interrupted by the entrance of the Herald.
All four turned to welcome the reluctant member of the council, and all four paused.
The long flowing dress that Klara wore when she was not travelling was gone. The Herald was dressed in a form of adventurer armor with heavy-cloth pants tucked into mid-calf leather boots. A long tunic and overcoat, both enforced with hard leather and metal bands, completed the top of the outfit. Her left arm, the one with the rift anchor, had a metal contraption running along the forearm and through the outer surface of the fingertips leaving the palm side with shiny mark free and bare.
Cullen idly wondered what was the left arm contraption for and if it was a form of armor, why the right arm didn't get the same.
The unruly mane of wavy chestnut hair was gone as well. In its place two tight braids were tied neatly and solidly together into a form of a braided ponytail, only a couple of stubborn short locks still framed the woman's face.
"Apologies for my delay. I went to welcome Iron Bull and got delayed."
Something was different about the woman. Leliana frowned suspiciously. Change rarely meant good things; interesting things, sure; good things, very rarely.
"You Grace, I didn't realize we are about to leave. I'll make preparations." Seeker was not fond of the unexpected either.
"It's alright, Seeker, we are not leaving right now. I felt a change was in order. Unfortunately, dresses just aren't practical right now. "
Leliana cringed inside. Their balanced if somewhat perilous situation was about to be shaken. The Herald was on a mission path, it was in her eyes, furious and despairing at the same time. She saw a similar look in the Hero of Ferelden eyes after a particularly bitter defeat or especially grotesque cruelties against innocent people came to their attention.
"Let us begin. I want to head out with the first light tomorrow." Klara leaned heavily onto the war table, trying to still her shaking hands. This was the first time she ran the meeting. She felt like a child of the lifetime ago, running the trading stall for her parents, waiting for some adult to challenge her right to be there, to play the role delegated to her.
"I've read the reports that a Grey warden may be in the vicinity of our camp in the Hinterlands. I'd like us to pursue that, and address other issues in that area at the same time. We will include Madam Vivienne and Iron Bull into the usual team set up."
A glance around the table told her that if anything her advisors were welcoming of her initiative and waited to hear her ideas, none looked upset or offended by it.
"Would it not be too many people in the team, your Grace?"
" Ah Commander… Have you not heard , I am a menace on the battlefield. We'll need all the help available"
Leliana smiled thinly. Herald's statement was meant as a joke, and a glance around the table confirmed it was received as such. Yet for a quick moment she saw the bitter fury in Klara's eyes, flashing with new fuel, before being pulled back under control.
"Adding extra people will be beneficial, Commander. The rifts are unpredictable. The mages will practice to be effective against different creatures of the rifts. The Inquisition needs to look into ways to obtain or craft more sophisticated armor, such that it can protect against magical attacks as well as against regular assault. Until such time we should travel in higher numbers."
Cullen nodded, Cassandra's explanation made sense.
"Speaking of better armor. Leliana, I have a set of items for your agents to track." Herald pulled out a parchment from the inside pocket of her overcoat.
Spymaster nodded and took the parchment quickly scanning the contents.
"The Chains of Tevinter.., The Amulet of the Stone, The..." Leliana stared incredulously at Klara. " Herald, these are some interesting choices you've listed. You really don't like your companions, do you?"
Klara's cheeks burned from embarrassment; the joke was a bit too close to home so shortly after the last disastrous trip. She wished her Spymaster was true to her name and kept the items for herself. Next time she'd save this type of request for private conversation. The other three looked curiously at them.
"What are the Chains of Tevinter…"
"An ancient artifact that is supposed to have unusually effective protective capability against magic. The downside for battle mages and warriors is that it dampens the magic and threat level of the wearer."
Leliana threw the sharp glance at Klara. She knew this was not the complete story, but decided to keep silent at the warning stare she got in response.
"The artifacts are for me, mainly. They are supposed to make me less noticeable to enemies. If my research is correct, they should give me space and time to disrupt and close rifts more effectively. All items on the list have limiting factors, and so they are not of use to most fighters. Yet the downsides they supposedly have will be irrelevant for me, as I don't have any meaningful skills to limit in the first place."
"I'll have my people look into these items." Leliana nodded and hid the parchment inside one of many pockets of her outfit.
"Thank you. Please let me know when you have the items... or the information on their location"
Leliana nodded.
"Herald, in preparation of the coming trip, do you have more information on the areas you want to visit?" Pushing back her curiosity about the items on the parchment, the Seeker focused on the practical items of tomorrow's trip.
"We will look for the main camps and root out the warring Templars and Mages. This should help stabilize the region." The nods around the table confirmed that all were on the same page.
"We will close the known rifts and any other rift that we will come across." This was also met with everyone's agreement.
"During the first excursion in the area we learnt about Carta channel for Red lyrium, but the opposition was too strong to pursue. I'd like to try to close that operation this time. Varric explained what the red lyrium is and I believe this should be our priority whenever possible."
Cullen nodded: "Clear enough, I'll prepare the resources for the three week trip, and send word ahead to the camps in the area. If you find good spots, we can use a couple more camps to completely secure the area."
Klara nodded.
" Thank you all for your patience and help. I'm going to turn in. See some of you in the morning."
She headed for the door. Then turned.
"Oh and, I'd like us to take the horses we secured from Master Dennem. Cassandra, I trust you to find me either a half dead horse or a skilled rider to ride with. Andraste knows I certainly won't be able to ride anything spry on my own."
With that the Herald was gone.
"Is it me or is the Herald different?" Cullen was never afraid to state the obvious, and the others chimed in.
"Her outfit is surely unlike her previous dresses. And the hair. I didn't know it could be tamed."
"Leliana, what is going on with these artifacts? I have a feeling Herald didn't tell us everything" the Spymaster smiled thinly, trust it to Cassandra to be suspicious.
"It is as Herald said, the items had their purpose long ago but the side effects make them useless for most people." The red haired woman looked up with a sincere and thoughtful expression in her blue eyes. "I have to say some items on the list, I'm doubtful they actually exist, but Herald's notes are very thorough and detailed."
Josephine nodded. "She started looking into it awhile ago. Maybe after the very first trip… She wanted me to procure some rare books to replace sources lost in the underground library of the Temple of Sacred Ashes."
Cassandra looked up at that. "I am surprised but relieved in a way that Herald was researching these."
" You mean because sometimes it looks like she is not really here, huh?"
Cassandra shrugged. "She was certainly present today."
Josephine bid everyone a good night and headed for the door. Cullen took the advantage of lull in the conversation and headed out as well.
"I wonder…"
Cassandra looked up at the Spymaster.
"About what?"
"Well, I wonder if any of us are ready for her to take charge… She is like none of us. We are all in our own right are accomplished fighters, leaders; all of us strove for more and strove to be more all our adult lives; through faith, through Game, through service. She strove all of her adult life to be invisible, inconspicuous, alone. Her way of doing things may seem strange or wrong to us. Will we be able to follow… Will she be able to lead… I wonder."
The silence was long but not uncomfortable. Both women lost in thought.
" I must say I didn't consider this, Leliana."
"Honestly Cassandra, this is your fault I am so introspective. After your revelation that we expect her to be more than she is I wanted to understand who she actually is…"
"And that is what you come up with. The Herald is an ordinary loner?"
" That is too simplistic Cassandra even for you." The Seeker shot a look at the smirking Spymaster. "I'm just saying don't expect her to behave the same as any of us would under stress."
"We'll see soon enough. I must head out to prepare. The inclusion of horses was unexpected."
Leliana headed out as well. She had plenty of stuff to do before the day was over.
The door in Klara's cottage opened silently, but not silently enough. Klara was reading before bed as was her habit as long as she could remember. So the barely audible click and a soft gust of chilly air was very noticeable.
She turned and was momentarily relieved to see a familiar face.
"What can I..uphf" the rest of her sentence was abruptly cut short, and sharp pain coursed through her at the punch to her midsection, she tried to move away but the taller and stronger body held her close. And then another sharp hit landed at her lower back. She barely held a scream. Her eyes watered from pain. She could tell a blade was running along her side before warm liquid and a sting told her the woman actually cut her.
"This is how it is going to feel when the Amulet of the Stone is activated." The softly accented voice hissed in her ear.
"Are you quite done?" Klara choked out, still catching her breath from the first blow.
"I'm not sure"
Klara was still in the vice like grip of the deceptively slender arms, but the woman gave her enough leeway to turn to face her.
" Thanks for the demonstration, Sister Nightingale. I trust you will keep this to yourself."
"I'm not sure about that either"
Klara's gaze hardened.
" This is not a request, Leliana. You will keep this knowledge to yourself. I won't have my team worried about my safety on the battlefield."
"Sure, you'll have no mark or injury on you, but you will feel every blow, every cut. The device was created for torture, Your Grace. What do you think it will do to your mind?! Why would you do that to yourself..."
"Because if I won't, the blows and the cuts will be real, only it would be on Cassandra and Varric and Solas and whoever else comes along sacrificing themselves for me. I won't have that!" Klara's voice lowered to an angry hiss as well, as she tried unsuccessfully to get out of Leliana's grip. "I suggest you let me go. Now!"
The arms eased but didn't let go completely.
"Unless you have a more exciting activity in mind."
"A more exciting activity?" The softly accented voice turned light and seductively low. Leliana made her point, pushing Herald further would only be met with more opposition. They didn't have the Amulet yet anyway.
This new direction the conversation was taking, this was interesting. Her research into Klara didn't indicate any personal connections in the past or present with anyone but her brothers. No lovers and no close friends.
Leliana let her hands ease even more and travel down and settle just below Klara's waist. The Herald was not wearing her reinforced leathers and boots, and now that Leliana wasn't focused on restraining her, she noticed just how much shorter and softer than she expected the woman was. Klara inhaled sharply, her startled gaze flew up and ran into the unreadable blue. She cleared her throat refusing to back down now, "Yes, a more exciting activity."
With warring fascination and alarm the wide hazel eyes stared into the pensive blue as they slowly moved closer.
"Perhaps another time" a whisper, and Spymaster was striding to the door. Before leaving the house she turned to look at still stunned Klara."You should be careful what you ask, Herald." a The Spymaster was back to her composed and solemn self.
"It appears so." Klara was still catching her breath. "Thank you for the warning, Sister Nightingale."
Leliana left. The parting statement from Herald ran through her mind. Whether the woman was going to heed her warning about the artifacts she requested was not yet clear. Whether the Herald was lonely or actually flirting with her was a curious puzzle.
End of Chapter 2