(AN: So, now we get to see things from the Exiles' side. For reasons that will become clear soon these next few chapters will be bumped up to 'M'. If you're not a fan of military humor or foul and vulgar language, ye be warned. For those of you who are coming in for the Harry Potter crossover, please read at least the first few chapters Of Privates, Princesses and Dragons to get familiarized with all the characters, especially the Exiles. For those of you who have jumped over from OPPD, welcome and enjoy the ride!)

(Somewhere in a forest in Sheffield, South Yorkshire England, 1239 A.D., 0830 hours local time)

The double doors that opened from the castle to the inner courtyard burst open as small crowd filed out. Incongruously this crowd was not comprised of knights in shining armor, or peasant serfs in rags, but rather 21st century U.S. Army soldiers in ACU's and Multicams. At the base of the stairs stood a tall old man sporting a long, bushy white beard and a conical cap, upon which was perched a sleeping owl. The wizard's gaze fell upon the leader of the soldiers, a tall man with a lantern jaw, dark hair greying at the temples and the oak leave clusters of a lieutenant colonel. The colonel spoke.

"Well Merlin, I have assembled the men. Now what is this all about?"

Merlin's bushy eyebrows creased his forehead as he smiled.

"Why, Colonel Long, to send you on another mission, of course."

LTC Long glanced over to his senior NCO, a gruff sergeant major by the name of Wolfe, who spoke up.

"What's this all about?"

"Well, you see," Merlin responded, "...a colleague of mine is in need of help. One of his charges is in grave danger..."

One of the soldiers, the medic named PVT Davis, piped up.

"Why send a soldier, sir?"

Merlin stroked his beard and looked over to the medic.

"Because, it is a soldier who is being sent to kill his charge."

At first no one caught on, but SSG Connors piped up.

"You mean one of Pilton's goons are going to go all Spec Ops assassination on them?"

Connors was referring to the 'Damned', the rival faction of the 33rd Battalion that was also in this world. Merlin smiled enigmatically.

"In a manner of speaking."

Sergeant Major Wolfe snorted.

"Just once I wish you'd talk straight, spinach-chin."

The wizard chuckled.

"But what would the fun in that be?"

The old NCO didn't respond, so Merlin continued.

"Now, fortunately this operation will only require one volunteer."

He noticed none of the soldiers looked interested.

"...And it also means the person whom you are guarding is a young lady. A witch-in-training, or magical girl, if you will. And it means you will have to get close to her and her female friends."

PFC Pete Gobbi pushed to the front eagerly.

"Hell yeah! Sign me up!"

Merlin chuckled.

"You do realize you will have to be close to her? Shadow her every move, and keep her from harm?"

The private nodded enthusiastically.

"Sure thing!"

The wizard clapped his hands together and started rolling up his sleeves.

"Excellent! Now, for this particular transformation spell I'm unfortunately going to need backup."

Gobbi gave a start.

"Wait, what? Transformation?"

The wizard stopped rolling up his sleeve.

"Why yes, Private Gobbi. You are going to have to be transformed to camouflage yourself."

He pointed to the private's ACU's.

"Think of it as you are wearing a disguise, like wearing a different set of clothes."

Before the private could react another person appeared in a puff of smoke, this one a grandmotherly figure in a sky blue cloak with pink lining.

"Ah, right on time."

"Indeed, It's good to see you again Merlin. And who is the candidate?"

Merlin gestured with his wand.

"That would be him. I do appreciate you coming on such short notice, but you see the gender-changing spells are not my forte, and unfortunately I can't afford to mix this one up."

Gavin looked aghast and spoke, slipping back into his New Orleans Yat accent.

"Wait, did I just hear chu right? Y'all gonna change the pri'at into a woman, now?"

Merlin looked exasperatedly at the major.

"Great Elephants! Major, have you been listening? I am not changing Private Gobbi into anything."

Gobbi let out a sigh of relief, then Merlin pointed to the Fairy Godmother.

"She is. And she isn't turning the private into a woman, she's changing him into a teen-aged girl."

In hearing this Gobbi started backing away from the wizard.

"Hey, hey! I didn't sign up to be turned into a girl, Whiskers! You can shit-can any ideas about that right now. I can go incognito and do recon an' shit..."

Merlin raised his hands placatingly.

"Now now, Pete, this won't hurt a bit, and I would like to emphasize that the spell is reversible."

He turned to the Fairy Godmother.

"It is reversible, isn't it, Margaret?"

"Oh yes, heavens yes it is of course."

She paused.

"I think."

The wizard turned.

"You see, Pete, nothing to...worry..."

Merlin's voice trailed away as he saw PFC Pete Gobbi running at full speed towards the Porta-John that was in far north corner of the castle's courtyard. He yanked open the door and slammed it shut. His muffled voice came through the door.

"I ain't comin' out neither! And Colonel Long, sir with all due respect you can NJP or Article 15 my ass but I ain't gettin' turned into no girl!"

Long looked back apologetically at Merlin.

"Well, I am sorry Merlin, but you heard the private."

The wizard looked unfazed.

"Oh, not to worry these things happen. And besides, it's not like that Porta-John is going to save him, unless the United States Army coated the interiors of their portable latrines with magic-resistant material, which I happen to know they didn't."

The Fairy Godmother pulled out a wand and started to sing a spell. As she recited the spell, the Fairy Godmother turned over to SGM Wolfe, whose dour expression didn't change.

"It'll do magic believe it or not..."

Conners leaned over to Major Gavin.

"Man, this shit's gettin' too weird..."

The major didn't have much of a response, as he and the rest of the Exiles watched as golden magic motes reached the Porta-John and gave it a light dusting. Then, when she finished her spell the Fairy Godmother looked over to Merlin.

"It is done."

At first there was no response. Captain Velinda Pelayo was the first to make it to the latrine. She called out to Gobbi.

"Ah, Private? Sound off if you're okay."

Then a voice, higher pitched and female, shouted out.

"I'm not fucking okay! I've lost my cock and I've got boobs..."

There was a pause.

"Holy shit, I've got boobs...Wow these feel nice! Hang on a sec..."

The Marine jogged over and pounded on the door.

"Private! You better not be doin' what I think you're doing! Get yer twat-ticklers off yer..."

She looked over and saw the Fairy Godmother was close by.

"Err, that is, stop touching yourself and get out here!"

The door opened, revealing a teenaged girl about 15 years old, with violet eyes, a small, upturned nose and fine blue-black hair that came down to her waist, and porcelain skin and soft pink cheeks (visual reference: Homura from Puella Madonka Magi). Her pink lips were pursed into a pout, and the girl looked very sullen. She was still wearing Army ACU's, and was struggling to keep her trousers up. She spoke up in a soft feminine voice but with a thick Kentucky twang.

"This sucks. Boobs aside, it sucks."

Captain Pelayo shrugged.

"You shoulda known better than to volunteer for anything, pri'ate."

She looked over to Merlin.

"Don't suppose you have a hammerspace door I can go through to get the private some new clothes?"

(Meanwhile, in Wiltshire, U.K., 2005, 0845 hours local time)

2nd LT Perkins woke up with a yawn, and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He had had the oddest dream, something so weird that him subconscious had supressed any memory of it, but he was glad to be awake. The lieutenant took in his surroundings, he was in a bedroom that was comfortable but not luxurious, with a four poster bed and a sitting area off to the side with a fireplace. There was a door on the opposite wall that led to an en-suite bathroom. He shuffled towards the door and grabbed his toothbrush, closing the medicine cabinet door that doubled as a mirror. He then saw the face of a beautiful redhead with grey-blue eyes staring back at him.

Pilton, Barnes and Ross were standing at the dining room table of the flat, going over reports when they heard a shriek, followed by the sound of broken glass. Barnes was the first on the scene, he charged into the bathroom, only to see Perkins crouched in the shower. The bathroom mirror was broke, shattered by the toothglass. He glanced back at Perkins.

She was still wearing a coyote brown US Army undertee and shorts, but she was still gripping a toothbrush in one hand.

"Um, loot? Is everything okay?"

She turned, as if just noticing Barnes.

"Sergeant, am I still a girl?"

"'Fraid so, loot."

"Is everything alright, sergeant?"

"Five by five, sir."

Captain Pilton finished his coffee and lit another cigarette.

"Good. When the loot is ready I want you to take her shopping, then RV with me at these coordinates."

He pushed a sheet of paper towards Barnes. The older NCO glared at the paper.

"Why do I gotta be stuck on shopping detail, sir?"

The leader of the 'Damned' took a drag and exhaled, smiling.

"Well, you have a lot of experience babysitting boot-loots, and in Kilo Company you're the only one who has a teenaged daughter..."

Barnes narrowed his eyes.

"I had a daughter, sir,"

Pilton paused and turned towards the audience.

"Yeah, for perspective SSG Barnes had a wife and daughter back stateside. I used to give him priority on the sat-phone back in Dubai so he could talk to them. At a price, of course."

He finished off his cigarette and dropped the butt in his empty porridge bowl.

"...but then they both died in a car accident. Poor dumb bastard blames himself. But, I can use this to my advantage."

Pilton turned back to address Barnes.

"...And I am very sorry for your loss, sergeant. But, think of this as an opportunity for the two of you to bond."

The captain held up a shopping bag.

"Here's a change of close for her. At least until we get her school uniform. I want the loot ready to go in fifteen mikes."

SFC Barnes turned, and made his way back to the lieutenant's room. As he walked his face was its usual stony taciturn expression, but his mind was a different matter. For the first time in a long time Bob Barnes was trying to remember.

'Shit, how do I relate to people again?' he thought to himself. As he climbed the stairs holding the bag Barnes mentally dug up old memories. Memories of him back when he still considered himself a member of the human race, instead of just a weapon fashioned out of flesh and blood and a heartbeat.

He stopped at the door to the master suite. The prick 1SG Dossler claimed the second-largest bedroom all to himself as top shirt, and Pilton settled for the living room. Obviously Perkins had to have a single room, Miller opted to stand guard over Freebird, which left the remaining four soldiers divided up among the remaining two bedrooms. Barnes knocked on the door.

"Perkins? It's Barnes."

He heard feet shuffling and the clanking of the door unlocking, then a feminine voice spoke up through the door.

"It's alright, you can come in."

Slowly the door opened, and SFC Barnes checked all corners of the room before settling on Perkins. She was sitting on the bed covering herself with the duvet. Barnes quickly looked away and set down the bag.

"I brought you some clothes. Ol' Wild Bill's got a mission for us, we need to do a supply run."

Perkins shook her head.

"But I still have the dress."

The senior NCO snorted.

"Clearly you've never had a daughter, loot. Girls your age wouldn't be caught dead wearing the same outfit two days in a row."

He reached into the bag and pulled out some clothes.

"The supply run is to get you enough appropriate clothing for the mission."

Barnes set a grey sweatshirt and a pair of blue jeans on a chair

"Afterwards we're to RV with Pilton at a designated extract, apparently there's some special wizard shit we need to get, I think it's called Digiton Alley or somethin'."

(AN: Well, there's another chapter. As I said before, it will help if you read Of Privates Princesses and Dragons to flesh out some of the characters of the Exiles and the Damned. So, if you like this story, comment, like, fav and follow! Until next time!)