Chapter 2 - New Scientist
After finishing his lecture, Farnsworth had sent his crew home, while Cubert and himself remained behind. The professor's mind was going to be completely different in several days, therefore his metamorphosis was actually still in progress.
Cubert agreed to stay with Farnsworth all day and all night, writing down all the changes in him, as he knew that at the end of it all he should get something worth having out of it: a present worth having, like a hover car for his 13th birthday.
In the middle of the night, Cubert felt thirsty, so decided to get up for a refreshing drink. However, when he got to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, all he found was several cans of Slurm belonging to Fry.
"Hmmm... I suppose I'm too thirsty to be choosy."
While slouching on one of the chairs inside the kitchen, he put his feet up over the top of the table in front of him, kicking over a half-empty paper coffee cup; so what, he'd been working all day long in that lab, and he needed a break anyway!
Just as he thought he'd reached his own little sanctuary, daydreaming about a giant 13th birthday cake for him alone, when his dreams were spoilt by the professor walking in.
Farnsworth noticed that Cubert was in the process of slurping down a cold can of Slurm, so he grabbed one for himself and sat down beside him. He then joined his son by slouching into his chair and putting his feet up on the table, sitting back on the two hind legs of his chair.
"You've never sat down to drink a Slurm before," remarked Cubert. "You're usually drinking something like tea or coffee?"
"I know... isn't it great!" replied the grinning, and now young, scientist.
"You know, you may have inherited some of the disgusting habits of that idle layabout, Fry."
"Oh Cubert, lighten up. Maybe there's more to life than being an intelligent inventor... that's why I invented this machine. Ironic, eh?"
"Hmmm... I don't think your brains or memories have been affected... but your habits have certainly changed. Maybe I'd better write this up in my notes before I forget," stated the young boy-genius, before running off to get his note book.
When he came back, the professor told him something else that he wanted written: "I actually feel as young as a 20-year-old!"
"Well, we did turn the dial to twenty," said the clone, sarcastically.
Farnsworth seemed pretty cheerful, considering. "Oh my, you are becoming older and wiser, my dear Cubert. Maybe when we get back to work in the lab tomorrow morning, we can begin attempting to finish another one of my unfinished life works."
"With any luck, I won't become an eccentric, mad scientist like you," Cubert responded. "Thinking about it somehow makes me feel mad already!"
The professor laughed. "That's somewhere in the near future, but for now, though, both of us should go to bed and get some sleep, for we have a big day ahead of us."
Early in the morning, when they'd awoken, the last thing on Farnsworth's mind was to do another invention. His metamorphosis seemed to have circulated much further through his system overnight, and therefore his mind and bodily functions had gone through a number of quite impressive changes.
The professor then went to Fry's cabin and began a search for a particular, special something. He'd seen his uncle bring that girlie magazine into his room, just after it had swapped hands with Bender, who'd stolen it for him - at Fry's own request, of course. Finally, after searching all the cupboards and draws, as well as any other nooks and crannies, he found it under Fry's pillow. He then remained inside Fry's cabin, gawking through the pages in secret; after all, he couldn't let his son know that he was getting a buzz looking at pictures of naked ladies. It was as if, even at the tender age of twenty, Hubert Farnsworth had become not just much younger and better looking than he was at one-hundred-and-sixty, he'd also become much hornier... just like Fry.
He couldn't sit in Fry's cabin reading his uncle's magazine forever, after all, the crew will be here soon, and the prof had to return it before they started work. He therefore decided to go out shopping to buy a copy or two for his own consumption. He could also look for some brand new, trendy outfits to replace his previous geriatric look, and also buy some crazy outfits for his other little mad scientist at the same time.
After arriving at a shopping district in NNY via the tube system, he discovered how much fun it was just to keep popping in and out from shop to shop, spending money freely to acquire the latest look. He bought dozens of multicoloured shirts, shorts, fluorescent coloured jeans, and patterned T-shirts - all in the modern new look for the year. He even swapped his slippers for a decent pair of trainers, and his doctor's coat for a black leather jacket with a million zips all over it. He also purchased similar clothing for Cubert, who was awaiting the big spender to return.
Just before finishing his shopping, he went and bought the latest hover sports car, which he used to transport himself and his shopping back. It seemed as if the prof had everything. But, for him, there was still something that wasn't quite right, something that was missing to match his new look.
After returning, Farnsworth told Hermes to allow the crew to go home early, as it was the last day of the week. So after the crew had finished all their deliveries, the prof''s words were echoed by Hermes, who also left at a similar time.
Having the Weekend off, it meant there was still enough time left for the professor to fill in the missing piece of his jigsaw: he wanted a slick hairdo to go with the rest of his "sexy thing" look. While visiting the barber, he was told that women loved a tall, dark and handsome man, which was a problem because he was ginger-haired! He looked through the barber's catalogue of hairstyles and chose, to the barber's dismay, the style of Pierce Brosnan's head's, and had it done... in ginger.
As soon as Fry and Bender left Planet Express on Friday evening, they decided to go for a stroll in the park that they passed everyday on the way home to their robot's apartment, but just had never thought of going inside before.
It was quite relaxing at first, just walking about staring at females of their own kind walking their dogs, but later turned sour when one of the dogs, a pit bull terrier, chased them to exhaustion.
However, after the dog had gotten bored with them, they found sanctuary at the other end of the park, finding a bench to rest on and get their breath back. Whilst sitting on the park bench, they both couldn't help doing what was one of their favourite pastimes: gossiping about the goings on of their work colleagues.
Bender began, in his usual vulgar way, "Hey Fry, the professor looks just like you, without his specs on... now that he's become young, red-headed and ugly, of course."
"Are you saying I'm ugly?" yelled Fry, as he believed himself to be a fantastic catch.
"Oh, don't worry, you're not the ugliest human I've ever seen... you're the second, after that ugly little Cubert clone."
Bender was just being nasty for fun, so in return, his best friend began to whack him over his shiny metal head with a newspaper he'd found on the park bench... just for fun of course.
As they were play fighting, a sly male voice suddenly came from behind them, "Did I hear one of you two mention that the professor has become young again, with an entire head of red hair?"
It was Walt, the eldest and bossiest of Mom's loyal sons. His other two brothers, the fair-haired Larry, to his right, and the scarlet-haired Igner, to his left, stood either side of him in that unforgettable line up.
The sneaky mummy's boy, Walt, took a step forward from his centre position. "Let me rephrase my question," Walt stared hard into Bender's binocular shaped eyes and slyly put his question straight to Bender's face, "If you want to be Mommy's very favourite robot, to be loved forever and ever by her, then I suggest you tell us what's going on. If you don't tell us, forever may never come.
"You see, if Farnsworth has gotten younger, then so can Mom... and she'll be very interested in that, might I assure you. She's very old and may die soon." It was here that Igner started to cry at the thought of his mother dying, resulting in Walt slapping him quiet. "Anything that can keep her young will keep her alive for longer... which means more love for you, my dear friend. So, tell us what the professor is up to, or suffer the blame and consequences at Mommy's funeral."
Fry and Bender sat on the bench, staring at each other in silence. They both knew that what Walt was asking for were the plans to the top secret invention.
Although Fry could see that the darkest sort of blackmail seemed to be taking place, Bender seemed to be struck down by guilt. He couldn't be responsible for murdering Mom, as he loved her more than he loved anybody else in the entire Universe.
Walt cut in again, "Just think about it. If you love her as much as she loves you, you'll come and see her tomorrow... I'll tell her she may expect you."
Afterwards, the three brothers left to go back and tell their evil, conniving mother that the robot should come and see her during the weekend, after their devious little talk.
As Bender sat on the park bench, he seemed to have already made his mind up to side with his "mother" in order to save her life. Fry, himself, couldn't see how it was even worth a second thought, therefore he wondered what on earth could have come over his friend. Why couldn't he see what was on the other side of the coin of this dilemma? He therefore began to argue frantically with Bender over their different compromising positions on the situation that just past.
"You're not actually thinking of going, are you?" he shrieked, after all, he'd never actually thought that his best friend would even consider something like this.
Bender sat there blankly. "And why not?"
"But what about the professor's secret, you tin head?" yelled Fry to his metallic friend.
"Yeah, what about the professor's secret, you empty head!" blurted back Bender sarcastically, who didn't particularly care that much at all for anyone or anything other than himself... or his mother.
"I can't believe you're saying this!" came Fry's return.
Soon, this disagreement became a row. The two friends could feel a lot of tension growing between them, and began a loud and lengthy debate on what was the right thing to do.
As they sat there on the park bench arguing, Bender decided to try and get his friend to see his side of the argument. "Tell me, Fry, if you were still in your own time and a crazy serial killer was holding your mother to ransom in return for just one lousy secret, wouldn't you snitch, too?"
Fry stopped yelling at Bender and tried to think about what the robot had just put forward. At first, he tried to remember any old memories that he still had of his mother. She wasn't particularly that bright, but one of the better things about her was that she had thick, shiny, orange hair, just like his own. He thought he'd use this common feature as the basis of his mental picture of his mother. He saw her as a big orange button, to match the colour of her hair. She sat next to a multicoloured button, which represented the amazing, kaleidoscopic secret, never to be told. The two buttons sat on a large computer, with just one problem: one had to be disposed of. But, which one?
If he'd still been living in the same time period as his mother and if he'd been given the same ultimatum, he wondered what the consequences would have been if he actually pressed the orange button down, to rid of her. Could he really be so immoral and worthless, though, towards his own mother? What would his future have been like? His father would have become so lonely and depressed, losing the will to live without her, and finally committing suicide. He would then have been left with his bullying, big brother,Yancy; to be blamed and tormented for the death of both their parents, and who would probably ended up murdering Fry for the trouble, then committing suicide himself, just to escape it all. The mechanical man's feelings began to appear much clearer to Fry: why somebody would reveal a lifesaving secret for the sake of their mother.
Fry stopped thinking, as it was now hurting his head, so he then decided he would have to apologize to Bender for his insensitive point of view against the robot's creator, Mom, who he "loved like pastrami".
As Fry lowered his tone of voice to a much calmer, more relaxed one, he began his apology: "I'm so sorry, Bender, please forgive me for wanting to do your mother in. I wasn't really thinking straight. Anyway, I shouldn't think that telling a small secret about that large piece of junk could do that much harm. And even if the worst did come to the worst, what is the worst that could possibly happen?"
"Thanks, Fry. I knew you'd see it my way in the end," Bender answered, hugging his buddy for his loyalty.
Fry suggested they left the park soon to go home and get some sleep for now, as Bender had a big day ahead of him on Saturday. He then added, "We'll have to also keep our little meeting with Mom's sons a secret, too, though, just between you and me, 'cos if any of the others find out, God knows what they'd do to you! I hate to say this, but now's the time to beware and wonder if that 'What If' machine was telling the truth, when it said that Leela would microwave you if you start wagging your tongue around."
Bender then remarked, in answer to Fry that he, too, was involved in their little ordeal with Mommy's boys, "As my assistant in crime and hearing everything, do you think that they'll do something wicked to you, too?"
Fry said nothing, he just looked at the robot quietly, as they both stood up from the bench. Then, after a while, he then whispered into the robot's ear, "And that's why the both of us have to keep really, really quiet about this entire thing... OK!"
"OK!" agreed the robot. Then he hugged his comrade, before making it back home to get some sleep for the next day.