Fandom: One Chicago
Title: Scars
Chapter 2: Only Forever
P O V: Sylvie Brett
A/N: Rated T for some mature descriptions of sexual acts.
A gentle breeze blows across the room through the open window, chilling my warm, sweaty flesh, which causes me to cuddle closer to my boyfriend's chest; my head lies in the crook of his arm. A soft giggle passes from my lips which are silenced when I kiss Matt's chest. In response, his arms wrap tighter around my delicate small frame, pulling me closer.
Starlight still glows outside, indicating morning has not arrived yet; it's the only light inside Matt's bedroom. Without opening my eyes, I know Matt is watching me, smiling. I can feel the smile as his lips kiss my arms and back across my shoulders. His nimble fingers run down my body's length, brushing away my tears and wiping the sweat off my body. "I never want to leave. Can we stay here forever, Matt?"
"I have no objections to your request, girlfriend. Wow, I love those two words, girl and friend combined; I can't believe it's finally official."
"Seriously, after last night, how can you not believe we're official? I can still feel you inside of me, Matt; your scent lingers on my skin." Matt's smile is devilish and adorable; I prop myself up on my elbows, leaning my body over his my fingertips, trace his impressive abs and fifteen-inch biceps. I'm smiling as I remember how his nervous fingers fumbled last night through my hair, trying to hold it free from my face as I straddled him in this position, kissing him.
"Beautiful." he breathed out his eyes, looking at my face. "more beautiful than a blooming magnolia in springtime."
"You're so sweet, Matthew."
"The truth is always sweeter than any Disney spun fairy tale."
I spent years dreaming of this moment when Matt and I would finally get it right, but no dreams could prepare for the intensity of Matt's touch, or the look of trust in his eyes, the promise of forever and only forever.
Connecting on the most intimate of levels wasn't about sex for either of us. It was a consummation of a million promises and healing shared pain. Sharing every heartbeat and erasing every fear last night was about leaving each other speechless but wanting to scream so infinitely vast because we're standing at the edge: our hearts were on fire.
Love is a thousand rose petals on one stem. It's sharing the dark times and the good times. It doesn't always make sense, but it bears no shame in bringing the tears of frustration of making no sense.
Matt held me so tightly as if I am the most treasured prize in this entire world. In his world. Kisses down my jawline over my fevered checks, our bodies rolled in sweaty tango; our breaths paused, our skin, our bodies aroused. "I love you, Sylvie."
Gentle caressing at my tear-stained cheeks, his smile so happy, so aware of how special this moment feels for the two of us. Our eyes locked last night; his hand rested on my lower back as we changed positions; he never touched me without permission. His respect only enlightened my desires: hand to head, mouth to mouth, roaming hands, overheated flesh. Soft music played to cover up our moans of ecstasy. His nervous hands were fumbling with the silver foiled package. "We don't need protection, Matt; I'm on the pill; I'm not ovulating."
"Sylvie, I want to protect you at every corner in our journey. Neither of us is ready for a child yet. We've barely gotten to know each other; we're not ready to become parents. Not yet, someday, my love, but not we don't need to create one tonight. You were worth the wait, so you're worth protecting."
I had been so touched by his words I cried openly, softly, taking the package from his hands and ripping it open with my teeth. Dancing in amusement, his eyes watched me as he held my hair back. I couldn't breathe, memorized by his smile, his sense of chivalry. "No need to rush, Matt, let's take it too slow a fire can burn for hours; I know mine isn't ready to be extinguished."
"I'm glad you said something took the risk; this pleasure is a thrill greater than any roller-coaster."
"I was scared, but I had to know, Sylvie."
"So let me show you how much I love you." Matt closed his eyes, allowing me to lead his hand down between the sheets so he could feel my warmth, my desire; his groan still echoes in my ears now hours later.
When his eyes opened again, he was staring directly into mine as I slide my legs open and settled gently on top of him. A raging fire engulfed us both gently as I used my hands to slide the protection over his readiness and guide him deep inside. I began a slow rotation of my hips. As I moved, our bodies became more engulfed in the blaze as sweat clung to the corners of our brows, dripping down over our naked stomach and thighs.
The stars created shadows of our bodies as we made love; our kisses became more profound, involving the tongue and little nibbles. Soft breezes from the open window were the only coolness felt between us, probably our saving grace from passing out from the fire which enveloped us in bodies, minds, and souls, drawing him deeper inside of me, and tried to press him out, the fire too hot for him to handle. His erection grew more prominent and harder; I felt I was about to burst wide open. It was the strangest sensation, something that went beyond simple sexual pleasure.
Our bodies, souls, and minds became one with the declaration of one word. Love.
Remembering how sweet our lovemaking was last night, I cuddle closer to Matt, now kissing his chest and his face. I can't get enough of him. I'm tired and so very sore, but I don't care; I don't want to sleep not tonight; I like the ache to burn all over my damn body; I want him in me, again and again, all the time. His weight on top of me; I want to make love to him all night.
I want to watch his face as I make love to him. I want my sweat to drop onto him to see how hard I am working to make him forget the ghosts of his pasts; he doesn't stop me as I open myself up and climb back on top of him. He holds my hair back, smiles, and kisses my jawline; his hands cup my breasts so gently.
He likes when I take charge.
Neither one of us bothers with the condom this time, too consumed by desire. I hold his hands to cup my butt; he squeezes, laughs, and thrusts deep inside of me again, and again. I push him down, moaning, feeling him so deep inside of me; I can feel every muscle working hard to grip him, take him deeper and hold him there. I might faint or vomit; I am held up by a feeling of dizzying suspension, like the one I have in dreams where I can fly, but only if I get into some weird position: Matt's bed creaks and shakes; our breaths become shorter. He holds me up tightly so I don't fall; even as my entire body is quivering, his left hand rubs small massaging circles across my breasts, arousing me, drawing me to his lips. We kiss softly and so sweet.
Matt knows what he is doing, binding me to him forever. He is slow, rhythmic, gentle, turning me over, so he is on top of me, spreading me apart by kissing me so deeply I can't think straight; I can't see anything except the stars shining above our heads.
I can't feel anything except love; sweet tender love, its gentle wings brushing over my delicate skin, moving down my body, sharp pain but brief as the sweet act of our love making moves beyond the physical sense.
A sweet spasm ripples through me. I seem to rise on the wings of love's embrace: no more pain, just the delighted breeze of pleasure. The world is ours tonight; we are each other's worlds, and no one else matters tonight; we are giving these stars a new story to tell for future generations. My moans fill the room as his hands grip my back and head, my legs buckle as I feel him deep inside my hot pulsating center.
They made him to be mine, and they made me to be his final detestation. When the lights go out, he becomes my moon, my sun; he is the only star in this galaxy I care to see them shine. His love makes me feel whole, like I can spend the rest of my life with him and only him. He is everything I have been praying for since I was a little girl, someone who can worship my body, treasure my soul and mind equally with my body, tonight he put his heart out on the line. He went the distance, put his trust into my hands. Lite, a fire between us, made my knees go weak.
Tonight, for the first time, I feel like Matt gets it. I need honor and promises for a man who is playing for forever, who loves me and treats me as an equal, not as candy for his arms. He'll walk through flames for me to protect me, but know he won't have to because I can defend myself. I've had promises broken, and they have left me yearning for those words to be voiced out loud.
I was already in love with Matthew Casey before he said those words back to me; now, hearing him saying those words only makes my love even sweeter. I never want to leave his arms so pulling him down. I kiss him with so much tenderness and passion he'll never want to go anywhere else as long as he lives; we laugh as our kisses break, we roll with each other as we hold each other tight and make love till the sun comes up, when we are finally so exhausted and sore we have no choice but to stop settling for cuddling in each other's arms. My head rests on top of his chest, feeling his fingers stroke through my hair. My heart beats wildly.
"I understand what you were asking for, Sylvie. Finally, it took me long enough unless commitment is made; there are only promises and hopes, but no plans."
"Yes, Matt, I need more than plans and hopes; I need a man who wants to spend the rest of his life with me and who will put in the work. I love you so much. I never knew love could be so powerful; it's sweeter than honey dripping off the comb, slow and sweet. Commitment isn't a word. It's a symbol of love. Stronger than a bottle of 100% proof, but sweeter than southern sweet tea. Thank you for giving me what I needed. I know it wasn't easy, but doing this shows me your emotions aren't purely sexual. It rooted them in a place of purity."
"They are honey; they are rooted in home. You make me feel fearless, strong, sexy, I got flaws, and I have regrets, but you make me feel like I can measure up to be the man I always wanted to be, not the man I was molded to be by my dad. So thank you, Sylvie I don't know your middle name Brett for showing me the possibilities of promises; thank you for believing in me, fighting for me and giving me space, and beating my ass when I needed it. You didn't hold back, and it's so damn sexy. By the way, what is your middle name."
I laugh, rolling my eyes. "Uh, you men are all the same, and I am never telling my middle name."
"Oh, I don't know. I thought I proved to you tonight I am above larger than the average man, and no fair you know mine."
"You did? I don't remember; you might have to remind me again." I squeal as his fingers tickle my flesh, crawling on top of me. "No, don't..Please...Matt…" his lips cover mine is silencing me again. Matt's kisses down my body, the heated glide of his mouth everywhere at once, tormenting my skin with his kisses leaving nobody part untouched, too much in some breathless gasp filled moments like how he cups my breasts in his lips, making my heart grow wider and beat wilder and never enough in others when he barley brushes my stomach leaving me shivering as if the butterflies had found a way outside my belly and are fluttering above my tummy.
I feel the strange ticklish caress of his hair on my inner thighs. I tremble with want and need and love. And then the kiss of his tongue shocks my trembling body in my most intimate of places. Until he touches me again, gently, then more boldly, and the curtain of white light descends through my body in a white flash of pleasured heat. I can't breathe!. I ball my fingers into fists, screaming as it overloads my brain in an emotional sea of blinding waves. My closed-up fists hit the sheets hard, clutching for control as he slips inside of me, completing me in the act of love; there's no turning back now. We've started on this course, and we can't stop now.
I don't want to stop either. Not for a second even to pee or breathe; I am too in love with everything with the word love and how we proclaim it. Love what a strange word so powerful, but so little, only four letters and so many emotions invoked because of them. Beauty and pain, tears, fears, validation, confidence, reassurance, Matt's kisses contain all of them and remind me of another word I have been seeking for and finally found.
Commitment.
I finally feel he's validated my confidence and reassured me of his commitment to treating my heart, mind, and soul as equally he's committed himself to please my body. Who can ask for anything more than the declaration of love while dancing in God's rain?
"I love you, Matthew. Maybe someday I'll trust you with my middle name, baby, but you have more to prove before you get that secret out of me."
"I love a woman who can be mysterious and sexy all at once. I hit the jackpot with you, Sylvie. I am so damn happy."
"You better believe you got the entire pot of gold with me, don't you ever forget it. You break my heart, and I will never forgive you."
"I would never forgive myself, Sylvie. You are my future, my now, we're finally together, that's more important to me than gold. You are priceless."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, baby. I am 100% sure."
"How sure?" my eyes linger on his mouth, which is wet and warm, so inviting. His eyes gaze over my face, with no hesitation when he says the words. "Only forever."